


A Tale of Isolation, Rivalry & Love

by nj_1996



Series: Covid-universe [1]
Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Depression, Fluff, M/M, Oral Sex, Rivals to Lovers, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-14
Updated: 2020-09-19
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:09:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 36
Words: 100,612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25897969
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nj_1996/pseuds/nj_1996
Summary: Locked in isolation after Covid19 cancels the first race of the 2020 season and all races for the foreseeable future, a charity streaming event reunites all the young dogs on the F1 grid as they raise money.Through their rivalry, it brings together Charles Leclerc and Max Verstappen, who along the way realize that despite all their differences, they might feel more for each other than either of them realize.
Relationships: Charles Leclerc/Max Verstappen, Past!Daniel Ricciardo/Max Verstappen
Series: Covid-universe [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2044273
Comments: 326
Kudos: 259





	1. All by Myself

**Author's Note:**

> Trigger warning: This work deals with Covid19 and the isolation that all of us have had to deal with. Please keep this in mind and please, if you are dealing with issues from all...this *gestures wildly*, find someone to talk to. You’re worth it.
> 
> This is my very first fic, so I would love to get your feedback and general comments, so please feel free to tell me whatever you want!

January 2020 was a good time to be Charles Marc Hervé Percival Leclerc. The 2020 season had ended with him cementing his status as Ferrari’s golden boy and with the full support of the team behind him as their undisputed number 1 driver, 2021 was only going to get better.

Then...everything happened. First, during pre-season testing in Barcelona, the 2020 Ferrari turned out to be, shall we say, not quite the championship-winning car everyone back in Maranello was hoping it would be. To make matters worse, the verdict about last season’s engine was released, casting doubt on Charles’ race wins and his season-winning pole position record.

It only got worse from there. Even during pre-season testing, the situation surrounding the corona-virus pandemic was starting to worsen. Back then though, things still seemed to be somewhat under control, nobody could fathom the impact it would all have just a couple of weeks later. 

Things only really changed when they got Australia to finally kick-off the 2020 season. After finding multiple positive cases within the paddock, the race was cancelled before FP1 even started and the season itself was indefinitely postponed as the pandemic worsened and ravaged the world. 

Charles was forced to return to Monaco and stay in complete isolation there, only allowed personal contact within his own little bubble. A few weeks into the lockdown, that bubble had reduced to what amounted to basically just his brothers and his mother, who had their own lives and were too busy to just come and see him all the time. It had originally included his now ex-girlfriend, who, after already never seeing her ever travelling boyfriend, had decided it was better for them to “take a bit of a break” now that she was stuck all the way across France for god knows how long. Charles knew what “taking a bit of a break” meant of course. It was over.

Then there was his personal trainer. He had a family of his own after all, and because of that he couldn’t be a part of Charles’ bubble for safety concerns for everyone involved. So Charles had to connect with him through a little screen. Nonetheless, he looked forward to his session every day, anything to not just have to sit in silence on his own, drowning in his own thoughts and despair about the state of the world.

So there he was. All alone in his apartment in Monaco. It felt like his life was crumbling. Racing was his life, his everything. He raced in memory of his father, Jules, Anthoine. If he couldn’t even do that, then there was nothing he could do to honour their memory.

He couldn’t even remember the last time he’d left his building at this point. All the fresh air he ever got was on his balcony. Groceries were delivered to his door and all he did during the day was workout to stay in shape and race on his simulator to keep his reflexes on par. He didn’t really eat either. Food just seemed to taste less good now that he had nobody else to share it with.

He felt like he was slowly starting to go insane on his own. Everything just felt so empty and meaningless without a goal to work towards. There came a point where he just wanted to spend the entire day in bed, soaking in his own misery and self-pity. All that kept him going those days was the continued support from his brother, his friends and his team, but his heart still wasn’t in it even then.

After those long, seemingly endless weeks of isolation and ever increasing existential dread, Charles was finally saved by a seemingly joking suggestion from Pierre on one of their calls to cheer each other up a little. “Charles, if you feel like you need more social contact, why don’t you just start streaming your sim training? Lando seems to enjoy his streams a lot.” Pierre offered, turning Charles eerily quiet for a second or two.

“You think people would want to see me practice?” Charles asked, sending Pierre into an absolute fit of laughter. “Charles, mate.” He managed to say between giggles. “You’re the good looking golden boy of the most popular team in Formula 1. People would watch you do a freaking crossword puzzle.”

Pierre was pretty sure he could hear Charles’ eyes rolling at that suggestion, but it was clear in his voice how pleased he was with the compliment. “Well, then I’m sure I have to give it a try, as long as you promise to be my first viewer!”

Over the course of the next week, Charles installed his full setup with some helpful pointers from Lando. He got a professional camera, microphone, streaming software, all he needed to be a real Twitch streamer. He made his account, even hired some graphic designers to make him a cool logo and transitions. He was more than ready. He had a goal again, something to look forward to after just sitting and waiting around for what felt like a century.

When it was finally time to go, Charles was beyond excited. He started off with some technical difficulties, but after a couple of minutes of stress and a string of curses, he finally managed to get it going. “Hi guys! So, this is new. From now on, to try and connect with you guys a bit more, I’m gonna stream my racing sim sessions. I hope you like it! And I’d love to hear from for suggestions and maybe other things we could do and things like that!”

From then on, Charles’ streams absolutely skyrocketed. Before he knew it, he was a Twitch partner, had thousands of subs and tens of thousands of viewers. He was building himself a huge online platform and it wasn’t long before people started to offer or ask for things. 

Time and time again, Charles resisted. He earned a ton of money from his Ferrari contract and personal sponsorship deals, he didn’t have to sell out his streams and market things to his loyal viewers and subscribers. The only thing that interested him was when his agent forwarded a request from a mental health agency, asking if Charles would at all consider doing a charity stream for them to help those people dealing with depression from the ever-continuing lockdown.

Charles instantly jumped at the opportunity. A seemingly endless stream of ideas instantly started coming to him and he spent the next couple days recruiting every F1 driver he knew with a streaming setup to get their audience as large as possible. He recruited Pierre, Lando, George, Nicholas, Alex and his brother Arthur to do a 6-hour stream in which they would do their own mini-F1 championship.

Just when Charles had pretty much finished setting everything up, Lando called him up and suggested he invite Max as well. Charles and Max had had a...rocky relationship ever since their karting days. As the best two drivers of their generation, they got into their fair share of squabbles, and it had ended at the side of the track instead of on the finish line more than once. Additionally, given the fact that they were both a tad competitive and didn’t deal extremely well with loss, their personalities had clashed a great number of times.

However, Charles’ rational brain won from his more combative heart and he finally decided to relent and call Max. Annoyingly, the guy didn’t even pick up on the first attempt, and so Charles had to summon all of his willpower to call Max a second time.

“Hello, who is this?” A familiar Dutch accent on the other side of the line asked after answering the call. “Hi Max, it’s Charles. I wanted to invite y-Wait. Do you not have my number?” More than anything, Charles felt offended. How dare this guy not have his number saved?! He was Charles Leclerc, people would kill to get his digits.

“Uhm...I guess not? I guess I never really needed to speak with you before? Anyway, what’s up? What’s this invitation?” Max finally replied casually, seemingly not bothered in the slightest. Charles let out a little huff and rolled his eyes on Max, already thinking this a bad idea. “I wanted to invite you to this charity stream that I’m doing with the other drivers. George and Lando and Alex and everyone. Are you interested?”

Max stayed silent for a second, seemingly considering the offer, before he finally replied to Charles “Ooohhh yeah, Lando told me about that. Sounds pretty fun. Yeah, sure I’ll participate, just make sure to send me the details and get ready to see my rear wing.” He joked, chuckling a little at himself.

Charles grumbled a little to himself and mumbled something about showing someone someone else’s rear wing before he managed to end the call politely. “Sure, I’ll text you everything. Just be sure to save my number so you know who it’s from.” He ended the call there, not wanting to give Max a chance for a witty comeback.

“That was so rude, wasn’t it?” Charles thought to himself as he ended the call. They had been racing together for so many years now. He had Max’s number saved, so why didn’t Max have his? Max was right, they didn’t talk much, or at all really, but he still could’ve....Charles sighed deeply. Even though he wasn’t Max’s biggest fan, he still had this compulsive need for everyone to like him. He was super nice, always polite, a really fair racer if he did say so himself. So why didn’t Max like him enough to save his number?

After he finally managed to shake those thoughts off, he texted Max all the details of the charity stream and confirmed to the other guys he was joining too. He got extremely excited texts back in the group chat from most of the others, and spent the rest of the week making sure everything was set up and promoting the stream on all the solo streams he did.

—————————————————————

2020 was supposed to be Max Verstappen’s year. It was supposed to be the year he became the youngest F1 world champion in history. It was supposed to be the year that he finally beat those damned Mercedes. Instead, Max was now stuck at home, with any hope of racing getting further away with each day of watching the news.

He was bored out of his mind. Yes he still worked out, did his sim work and all that. Yes he played a ton of games with Lando and the other guys, but he just really wanted to get back to racing. He missed it like crazy.

So it was a pretty nice surprise when Lando started to mention this mini championship they were going to be doing for charity. The only problem being that Charles was organising and he hadn’t invited Max. And there was no chance in hell Max was going to ask himself. He was way too proud for that.

When his phone finally rang, Max had already given up on joining the event. Lando had been pestering him to just ask Charles of course, but Max just wasn’t having it. He was in the middle of a game when he heard his ringtone, but he couldn’t pause an online race, so he just let it go to voicemail.

The second time, he was just crossing the chequered flag, so he picked up without really checking the caller-ID. “Hello, who is this?” He asked politely. “Hi Max, it’s Charles. I wanted to invite y-Wait. Do you not have my number?” The voice on the other side replied. For a moment there, Max was about to reply seriously, but really, if there was a chance to rile Charles up, Max wasn’t going to let it slide.

And so he did just that, despite of course having Charles’ number in his phone. “Uhm...I guess not? I guess I never really needed to speak with you before? Anyway, what’s up? What’s this invitation?” Max could hear the annoyed huff coming from Charles at his reply and he had to bite on the inside of his cheek to keep himself from bursting out laughing.

“I wanted to invite you to this charity stream that I’m doing with the other drivers. George and Lando and Alex and everyone. Are you interested?” With Charles finally asking him, Max instantly broke into a grin. He finally got to race everyone again! Virtually, but...still. It was something. He had to play it cool though. Pretend that this was pretty much the first time he really heard about it. Like he wasn’t jumping at the opportunity.

“Ooohhh yeah, Lando told me about that. Sounds pretty fun. Yeah, sure I’ll participate, just make sure to send me the details and get ready to see my rear wing.” Max replied casually, though he was once again completely unable to hold back from sending a witty reply in Charles’ direction.

“Sure, I’ll text you everything. Just be sure to save my number so you know who it’s from.” Charles was quick to end the call with that, and Max instantly bursted out laughing. Charles really was just the easiest guy in the world to tease. God, he really couldn’t wait for the charity stream.


	2. Old Rivalries Never Die

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: This work deals with Covid19 and the isolation that all of us have had to deal with. Please keep this in mind and please, if you are dealing with issues from all...this *gestures wildly*, find someone to talk to. You’re worth it.
> 
> This is my very first fic, so I would love to get your feedback and general comments, so please feel free to tell me whatever you want!

The entire day leading up to the stream, Charles was absolutely bouncing with excitement. There had been a lot of buzz online and Charles had even done a few interviews to make sure that as many people as possible knew about the event. The donation website had been launched earlier that morning and they had already received a couple hundred euros worth, getting Charles even more hyped for what was to come.. The charity had already sent their thanks to Charles for organizing all of this, and the whole thing made Charles’ heart just feel so full for what felt like the first time in forever.

The stream was scheduled to start at 5 in the afternoon, and so Charles was fully ready at about 4.30. He had enough water and snacks with him to make it through the entire 6 hours, and for the occasion he had put on his favourite bandana and glasses to be able to read all of the comments to the stream. He was ready, he was excited, it was time to get started.

He quickly checked all of his streaming equipment, his software, his internet connection, started his game, headed into the Discord call, everything he needed to do to make sure this went off without a hitch.

Annoyingly though, he hadn’t seen that Max was already waiting in the Discord call, and so there was no way out of this. “Heeeeey, Charles!” Max said excitedly. “You ready to raise some money and lose some races?” He asked, the tease in his voice and the grin on his face clear in his words.

“Haha, very funny Max. But I think we both know that I’m a little better at this game than you. So why don’t you just focus on raising as much money for charity as you can and stop trying to beat me so hard.” The first thing Max did was snort at the implied innuendo of that sentence, the second was to smirk. “Oh I’m not trying to beat you Charlie boy. I’m just telling you that it’s going to happen, whether you like it or not.”

Charles just let out a little groan when Max had the audacity to call him Charlie and was just about to say something that might escalate the situation when Lando joined their call. “Heeeeeeeey, there’s my two little lovebirds! How you doing boys? Ready to race without me once I lose connection?!” He called happily, only picking up on the tension in the call once it stayed quiet after his words. “Sooooooo, I guess not then…? Maxy have you finished practicing?”

Max finally spoke up again once he was adressed directly and finally informed Charles why he was bejng so cocky. “Oh yeah. I’ve barely slept since Charlie invited me. I’ve only been practicing so I’ll be sure to beat all you jokesters.”

“Well, we’ll just have to wait and see whether there’s anyone out there who can defeat the legendary lando-bot.” Lando replied with a grin, making both Max and Charles laugh. “I’ll do my best Lando, but to remind you, this isn’t about winning, it’s about raising money.” Charles told his friend. “Yeah yeah. That’s the overall goal, but some spicy action on track will entertain more people and entertained people will pay more!” Lando was quick to assure. 

Over the course of the next thirty minutes, everyone else joined both the Discord call and the game, so that they were all ready to go when the stream started. Everyone started their own individual streams, and so did Charles, saying his hellos and introducing all the thousand upon thousand of viewers to the purpose of the stream itself.

“Hi guys! So tonight we are doing the big charity stream for people who are suffering from depression because of the pandemic. First of all I need to tell you that if you are suffering from depression, it really is okay to ask for help. You’re not weak for admitting that you need it, you are strong and brave for having the courage to speak out and say so. Now then, for all of you goes that I hope that all of you will be giving generously, if you are able of course, and we are all going to have a fun night together! Now, I wanted to save this to the end of the stream, but to get things started I have decided to donate €20.000 myself!”

Charles comments whent absolutely ballistic at the announcement and he couldn’t but chuckle as he read them. “Thanks guys, you’re all very sweet. Now, let’s go to the link in the description of the stream and donate!” He already had the donation page lined up, and so all he had to do was click donate to submit the cash to the charity. 

“There it is everyone! Let’s have some good races now and let’s raise as much money as we can for a good cause!” Charles went back into the general chat then and decided to get the actual racing bit of this stream going. “Alright guys, a reminder for all of you and an explanation for all the people watching. We are going to do a 10 race mini championship tonight. 25% race distance, one-shot qualifying. Full simulator damage, but no safetycar, we can do that ourselves. We’re starting off with Australia, followed by China, Spain, Monaco, Canada, Germany, Spa, Monza, Japan and finally Brazil. Uuhhmmmm, if there’s anything else, we’ll talk about it during the game. Let’s go!”

And with that, Charles started the game. He was feeling pretty sure of himself. The stream was running smoothly so far, they had already raised a couple thousand in addition to his own donation and all together, they seemed to have close to a hundred thousand people watching all of their streams.

They started off with the Australian Grand Prix and immediately, Charles’ ego took quite the dent. He was P2, which was….okay, but Max was P1, over half a second clear of him. “What the hell?!” He called when he rejoined the general chat. “Mate, you must’ve cut some corner somewhere!” He yelled at Max. He had felt like his lap had been pretty much perfect, this was just impossible.

Lando’s giggle was clearest in all the laughing and the Brit just couldn’t help himself. “Not so easy with a normal engine Charlie, is it?!” He replied, instantly making Charles go silent for a second. Charles usually didn’t run out of words, and he looked a little flustered as he tried to think of something to say in response.

Luckily, George saved him. “No but honestly guys.” He called out. “How the hell are you all so fast in this game? It’s absolutely ridiculous.” There was a general chuckle at George’s despair at his own pace, and Charles quickly decided to start the race then, cutting off all the chatter.

The race was eventful to say the least. Immediately at the start, George managed to take Alex out by ramming fully into the back of him at turn 1, earning him a full “GEOOOOOORGE! USE YOUR BRAKES FOR GOODNESS SAKE!”and instantly taking the both of them out of the race. The midfield was a huge battle, with Lando, Nicholas, Arthur & Pierre jostling for and changing positions practically every single lap. 

Driving off into the distance were Max and Charles, locked into a heavy battle for the lead. Max led up until the pitstops, but a bad stop from his team handed the lead to Charles. They battled lap after lap, with Max managing to get a wheel in or even alongside Charles a number of times, but never quite managing to send it through to the lead.

Eventually on the final lap, Max fully went for it. He managed to get side-by-side with Charles’ Ferrari. He was on the inside, but off the racing line, so he had to brake slightly earlier than Charles heading into turn 1. He locked up, his tyres screeching as they slid across the track…and straight into the side of Charles’ Ferrari.

As they approached turn 1 for the final time, Charles was determined not to lose the lead. Max lined his Red Bull up right next to him, but he was on the dirty side, so he’d have to brake earlier. As they went in for the corner, Charles even decided to steer in a little early, not giving Max a chance to stay on his side as they continue into turn 2 and the next straight.. As soon as he did though, he felt the impact of the collision through his steering wheel, causing him to curse loudly as they went off.

The both of them went straight into the gravel, cursing furiously at each other, as neither was ever going to admit they did anything wrong.. It took him a few seconds, but Max finally managed to get out of the gravel and limped home to barely secure third after Arthur and Pierre. Charles on the other hand was not so lucky. It took him way longer to get out of the gravel after the crash, having even knocked off his front wing against the barriers, and he only crossed the line behind the other finishers in 6th.

As soon as everyone re-entered the general chat, the accusations started flying. “You rammed me off the track, you completely missed your braking point!” Charles called, making Max laugh dryly. “Are you kidding me? Even in karting they know to leave more space than you did!”

“Oh, you wanna talk about karting? Because this is Milan 2012 all over again Verstappen, and you know it!” Charles was right back there in his mind,, the first time Max managed to drive him off the track. This had all the same characteristics as back then written all over it. 

“Yeah, it is!” Max immediately yelled back at Charles. “Because you didn’t leave me any space back then either, you littl-“ He went on, but was cut off by George. “Gents, gents, calm down. It’s just a game. Or you know, get a room, but that’s your choice.” Max and Charles both grumbled a little at that, but decided not to fight over this any longer. Or at least…for the time being. Instead, the both of them both silently decided that there was no chance in hell they were losing this championship, virtual game or not.

The next 8 races on the schedule went fairly standard for the most part. There were some crashes, a good number of safety cars and more than one internet crash on Lando’s side, but overall the situation was pretty good. Now, with only the final race in Brazil left, Max and Charles were still neck-and-neck in their little championship. The others were left in their dust at this point and had shifted to really focus on the money raising part of the stream, but Max and Charles were as competitive as they had ever been. Neither of them was prepared to lose this. Not after how the first race had gone.

Before they entered the final race, Charles decided that it would be good to go through the standings to build some extra tension. “So okay guys, the standings are as follows: Last is Nicholas on 59 points, George on 73, Lando and Lando-bot on 75, Arthur on 93, Pierre on 94, Alex on 103, Max on 177 and Charles on 181. That means a lot can still happen in the final race, including the championship decider!”

There was a bit of grumbling at the standings, mostly from Nicholas and George, while Lando sang the praises of Lando-bot to the Spiderman theme.. “Lando-bot, Lando-bot. Does whatever a Lando bot does. Does he win, no he doesn’t. But he’s still, better than George!”

Everyone giggled at that one, and after a few more jokes and teasing here and there, Charles decided that it was time to start the final race. “Alright guys, I’m going quiet. See you on the other side once I win the championship!” He called, before he pressed to start the quali session.

The quali session ended with quite the shake-up of the field. After locking up heading into turn 12, Max had lost quite a bit of time, meaning he only qualified as 5th, whereas he needed to make up four points on Charles to win the title.  
The line up of the grid came to:  
1\. Charles  
2\. Alex  
3\. Arthur  
4\. Pierre  
5\. Max  
6\. George  
7\. Lando  
8\. Nicholas

Neither Max nor Charles joined the general chat again after quali, both too focused on trying to win this thing to talk niceties. And given that they were already running about 20 minutes over time, they went straight into the race.

It was five red lights and away they went on the final race of the mini virtual F1 championship, the 18 lap Brazilian Grand Prix! They all made it safely through turn 1, the only changes being Max passing Pierre for P4 and Lando passing George for P6. 

In the next couple of laps, Charles started to slowly pull away from Alex, while Max overtook Arthur for P3 on the fourth lap of the race. He got closer and close to Alex, but he just couldn’t get the pass done.

The strategy the game had selected had called for Max to come in for his stop on lap 12, to swap out his medium tyres for soft ones to finish the race on. Given that he was now behind Alex, and they were part of the same team, that was quite a risk. If they went in on the same lap, Max would have to wait for Alex’ stop. If he went an extra lap, he might lose too much time, ending any hopes of victory.

So instead, at the end of lap 11, he dove into the pits to try and get the undercut on Alex. His team managed to do an absolutely incredible stop, and after racing the best out lap of his virtual racing life, Max managed to just squeeze it in ahead of Alex heading into turn 4. Now, with just 6 laps to go in the championship, Charles was only 3 seconds ahead.

Charles was on edge from the moment he saw the Red Bulls fighting behind him. He couldn’t manage to really get away from them even as they held each other up, and he feared he would be a sitting duck once Max finally got past his teammate. He pinned most of his hopes on the pit stop, thinking that maybe the soft tyres would be more to his liking and he could still win this thing.

Charles’ pit stop went off without a hitch, but his heart sank a little when he spotted Max completing the undercut on Alex behind, meaning the Dutchman would come charging for him next. The gap was steadily declining, and Charles knew he would have to drive his very best to keep Max behind.

At the end of lap 13, the gap was 2.8 seconds. Lap 14, 2.2. Lap 15, 1.7. Lap 16, 1.1. Charles knew that towards the end of lap 17, Max would be in DRS range. He would have 3 chances overtake. The start finish straight, the back straight, and the approach to the finish line on the final lap.

First was the start finish straight. The gap at the exit of turn 12 was about 0.8 seconds. Both Max and Charles gave it everything they had. Max opened his DRS, came closer and closer…but couldn’t quite nail it, staying just behind at about 3 tenths of a second.

Next, the back straight. The dirty air behind Charles’ car meant that Max had a worse exit coming out of turn 2, but still, he had his DRS. He moved in for the kill, coming closer and closer. Charles deviated from his line, moving to the inside to defend, while Max moved alongside the Ferrari on the outside. They braked at the exact same time, but instead of turning in, Charles kept it straight, pushing Max out of turn 4, forcing him to lift off the throttle and setting him back a couple of tenths.

Max let out a string of curses under his breath, feeling like Charles was deliberately pushing him off the track and trying to steal his win. Pushed by pure spite alone, he proceeded to close the gap on the next couple of corners. Charles’ advantage heading onto the final straight, the last approach to the finish, came down to just over 4 tenths of a second.

Max’ exit out of turn 12 was incredible. He immediately started creeping closer and closer to Charles’ Ferrari, managing to place it alongside his once he had his DRS open. They went side-by-side to the finish. Charles was still ahead, Max was still catching him and then……the chequered flag flew.

“YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES. P1! TAKE THAT!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oofff. I hate reading cliffhangers as much as everyone, but apparently I can’t resist it while writing...
> 
> Next time: The winner! More yelling! Other shenanigans!


	3. In Love and War

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: This work deals with Covid19 and the isolation that all of us have had to deal with. Please keep this in mind and please, if you are dealing with issues from all...this *gestures wildly*, find someone to talk to. You’re worth it.
> 
> Warning: This chapter contains smut!
> 
> This is my very first fic, so I would love to get your feedback and general comments, so please feel free to tell me whatever you want!

“YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES. P1! TAKE THAT!” Charles was absolutely ecstatic as they crossed the line and the game informed him he had somehow held on to P1. As it turned it, by just 0.049 seconds, an absolutely razor-thin margin. He dropped his hands in his lap and let out a long sigh, which relieved some of the tension and adrenaline in his body. “My god that was close.” He told the camera, chuckling a little to himself. “That was the kind of racing you came here to see though, right?!”

He stayed in solo chat for just a little bit longer, reacting to the incredible amount of excited messages he was getting in chat and completely ignoring some of the trolls. Once his heartbeat had finally come down, he decided to join the others again in the Discord call.. “Alright guys, let’s go back to the others.” He finally announced, unmuting the general call and immediately informing the others of his presence.

“Your champion has arrived!” He said with just the biggest grin on his face. “How was that, eh? Racing masterclass!” He added excitedly. It stayed silent for just a second or two, before the yelling started. “Are you fucking kidding me?!” Max exclaimed. “First you cut me off in the Australia race and now you push me of the track because you are unable to lose like a man and just race fairly!” 

Max was absolutely furious. Charles was such a terrible loser. And a bad sport. And a dangerously driving moron. “You should’ve been penalised then, and you should definitely have received a penalty for that bullshit move in turn 4.” He added, his knuckles still white from how hard he was gripping his steering wheel in anger. 

“I hope you have a long fucking think about this Charlie. Is this really the example you want to be for all the little ones out there idolizing you?” Charles was more than a little taken aback by the hostile response he was getting from Max. He figured the Dutchman would be angry about the move, but he hadn’t anticipated getting such a telling of from him. “I-“ he started, but Max interrupted him. “Goodnight.” He said, and with that, left the Discord call.

The silence was deafening for a couple of seconds, until Lando let out a low whistle. “Weeeeell, at least you can’t blame him for not taking this thing seriously.” He said and started laughing a little. “So Charles, I think we probably should end it there. We’re already more than half an hour over time and it’s getting pretty late. So, thanks for organising all of this and hopefully see you soon!”

After Lando left the call as well, the others one by one said their own goodbyes, before leaving the session, leaving Charles with just his own stream to deal with. “Soooooooo…..” he started, still feeling a little flustered from being called out like that by Max. “Let’s uhm…let’s check how much money we raised tonight!” He said, heading over to the donation page and letting out a bit of a gasp at the number he saw on screen.

“Oh my god everyone!” Charles exclaimed excitedly. “We have raised almost three hundred thousand euros! That’s amazing!” His eyes drifted to the side, where the top 10 largest donations were listed. Charles was still on top with his 20 grand donations, but he was very pleased to see the other top donations all going over €1.000. He started to read out some donation messages, when the page suddenly refreshed and showed a new top donation.

€25.000, donated by one M. Verstappen. Charles simply stared for a second. It was super, super generous of course. But something in the back of his mind kept telling him that this was just another way for Max to get one up on him by beating his own donation. He couldn’t let that show though, he had to be the bigger man.

“Oh wow!” Charles finally managed to get out. “25 thousand! That’s such an incredible donation, thank you so much Max!” He said, smiling brightly. No matter if Max was doing this to spite him, he was still donating a lot of money to a cause Charles cared about, and that was something to be applauded. 

“So guys, it’s been real fun hanging out with you for all this time, but with that huge donation and how much I really have to go pee right now, I think that’ll be it for tonight! So thank you all so, so much for donating whatever you could and we’ll speak again soon!” With that, Charles ended the stream and quickly jumped out of his seat, running off to go and pee like he said.

Given that it was already approaching midnight, Charles decided to go to bed right after. It had been a really intense evening and now that it was over and there was nothing but quiet around him, the Monégasque really felt just how tired he really was. He undressed himself and dove right into bed, falling asleep pretty much straight away.

When Charles opened his eyes again, it was after feeling a soft kiss on top of his head. “Good morning, Charlie.” A very recognisable accent whispered into his ear. Charles let out a blissfully happy sigh in return and snuggled into the man’s warm embrace a little further, nuzzling his face into his chest as he was held. “Hi Maxy.” He mumbled.

He was still feeling rather sleepy and would’ve loved to just stay like this forever, but he nonetheless easily went along with it when Max gently tipped his head back and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. “Goodmorning, my golden boy.” The Dutchman said quietly, giving Charles a wink. “How about you stay right here for another little while and I go and get us some breakfast?” He suggested, making Charles groan quietly and Max giggle in response.

“I know how clingy you are in the morning, gorgeous. But I promise that after you eat all of your breakfast, you can have me all to yourself.” Charles hummed softly at that and licked his lips as he looked up into Max’s kind eyes. “You promise? All to myself? For whatever I want?” Max instantly got a playful little glint in his eyes and nodded as he stared Charles down. “Down, boy. After breakfast.” He teased and winked, then started to kiss Charles again as he slowly untangled the Monégasque from his own body.

Once they were separated, Max stepped out of bed, and Charles couldn’t help but sigh at the way the Guthman looked absolutely sinful. He had gotten so muscular over the years, and his tight boxers showed off his ass and bulge in a way that had Charles going crazy already. “I don’t know if I can wait until after breakfast.” He told Max, who grinned and put on some sweatpants. “Anything you want, my love. As long as you finish your breakfast first.”

Max left the room then, leaving Charles all by himself. He curled himself back up underneath the duvet and smiled, feeling so lucky to have a boyfriend that cared so much about him to even force feed him breakfast before being allowed to do more fun activities with him. Thankfully, it seemed like practically no time at all had passed when Max walked back in, carrying a tray with beautifully cut fruit, fresh orange juice and a waffle for each of them.

“Oh that’s looking spectacular!” Charles told Max, finally coming up from underneath the duvet and sitting up to eat. “And I have to say, the food honestly isn’t looking bad either.” He added with a smirk, making Max laugh as he walked closer and put the tray in front of Charles. He leaned in, giving the Monégasque a sweet smile before giving him a soft kiss on the lips. “You’re such a flirt.” He whispered. “And you know I absolutely love it.”

Max got back into bed with his boyfriend and proceeded to share a breakfast with him until they had finished everything that he had brought to the bedroom with him. Now, as soon as Max had put the tray to the side on the nightstand, Charles was on top of him. He had his legs straddling the Dutchman’s thighs, his hands in his soft hair and his lips strongly planted on the other’s. 

“My my, someone’s in an exciting mood this morning.” Max quipped with a smirk as he put his hands on Charles’ hips. “I want you so fucking bad, Max.” Charles whispered in return, holding on tightly to the man as they made out. He could feel his boxers growing tighter with every passing second, and he let out a low moan into his boyfriend’s mouth as Max’s hips moved up to meet his own. 

“I’m going to make you feel so fucking good, gorgeous.” Max told Charles between kisses. “My champion deserves the very best.” As he finished his sentence, Max grabbed a hold of Charles’ body and rolled the both of them over, never breaking their kiss. He pulled back slightly, smirking down at his boyfriend as he held him down below him. “Just relax and enjoy, my love.” He told Charles, before he kissed him again.

Their kiss went on for another minute or so, after which Max started moving to Charles’ neck, kissing and biting softly at the skin. “N-no don’t want marks.” Charles mumbled weakly, making Max smirk. “You’re mine, aren’t you? Why hide it?” He asked, simply continuing where he left off.

After making Charles fall apart underneath his lips, Max decided to stop teasing the poor boy so much. He moved down his boyfriend’s body a little, kissing his chest and abs as his hand slowly disappeared into the left leg of Charles’ boxers.

Charles gasped and let out a soft moan, as he felt Max’s hand gently cupping his balls, before his fingers closed around his achingly hard cock. “Fuck, Max. Please.” He mumbled, closing his eyes as he just couldn’t handle the look of Max looking so sinful for him.

Max hummed softly to Charles in response and gave his boyfriend’s cock a soft squeeze, before he started to gently stroke him, creating a wet spot on the front of Charles’ bright red boxers. “Hmmm, I don’t think so, baby. Fucking is for next time. Today I’m going to suck that pretty cock of yours.” As he said so, he leaned in and licked the wet spot on Charles’ boxers, making the boy shiver visibly and moan deeply before he bit down on his lip.

“Please, Maxy.” Charles said quietly, completely at the Dutchman’s mercy because he was just so fucking desperate to get off at this point. Max grinned at Charles words, and placed a kiss on Charles’ clothed cock. “Your wish is my command, my love.” He said and winked, before freeing his lover’s cock. He helped Charles to get his boxers off entirely, humming softly as he took in the sight before him.

“So beautiful and ready for me.” Max said with a grin. He moved down completely between Charles’ legs and wrapped his fingers back around Charles’ rock hard cock. He gently pulled the foreskin down, exposing the wet head as he leaned in and gave it a soft kiss and a kitten lick. “Mmmm, tasty as always, babe.” He said, winking up at Charles.

Charles was an absolute mess by now. Max was looking so fucking hot between his legs and he felt like he was going to come as soon as his lover actually started sucking his cock. When Max leaned in and finally closed his lips around his cock, Charles felt like he was on fire in the best possible way. It felt incredible. Max seemingly knew his body better than Charles knew it himself. The way he teased the head with his tongue, how he managed to deepthroat Charles and take all of his impressive size down in one go, how he knew Charles loved it when he gently tugged at his balls and how he had to keep his hips down against the bed to not get choked.

It was the best blowjob Charles had ever gotten in his life and he wished it didn’t have to end as suddenly as it did. Out of nowhere, Charles suddenly felt a finger prodding at his hole, and the anticipation alone was enough to send him over the edge. He came hard into Max’s mouth, his boyfriend’s piercing blue eyes staring up at him. Charles felt so fucking good, so fucking happy, so fucking pleased with his life….and then suddenly everything went black as he blinked and his eyes opened again.

Charles’ chest was quickly moving up and down as he caught his breath. His heartbeat was going crazy, he was covered in sweat and he could feel a distinct wet spot on his boxers. “Fuck…” he whispered out loud, remembering every instant of his dream in vivid detail. He was in such big fucking trouble.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time: The aftermath! Rivals! Crushes! Perhaps even more...?


	4. Surprise, feelings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the feels chapter guys. Charles is a precious cupcake and I try not to hurt him too much, but he has to cause plot ):

Charles wasn’t able to sleep for the rest of the night. All he could think about was that dream. What the hell did it mean? Why did it still kind of turn him on when he thought about it? And most importantly; Why couldn’t he help but smile when he thought about what it was like waking up in Max’ arms? It was infuriating to Charles. 

Only when the first beams of sunlight started to come through between the drapes and hit the side of his face was Charles ripped from his own thoughts. He had a startling realization how disgusting he currently was and quickly scrambled out of bed. He lost his filthy boxers and walked into his en-suite, getting in the shower and just standing underneath the hot water for a little while as he collected his thoughts.

What even were this weird feelings. He didn’t even like Max, did he?. They were huge rivals, they fought all the time. Charles would admit that Max was hot. He had grown a lot more muscular over his years in F1, much more sure of himself, and yes Charles had forgotten his train of thought a time or two when those piercing blue eyes stared into his and Max smiled, but that wasn’t a crush right? Fuck.

Charles realized he needed some help. If he just kept trying to deal with this on his own, he would just keep diving further and further into whatever this was until he drowned in the endless swamp that was his own mind. He needed to talk to Pierre. He would normally talk to one of his brothers, but that was just a little too close for comfort, especially concerning matters of the heart. 

He stayed in the shower for another little while, taking his sweet time to clean himself up and collect his thoughts before he finally stepped out. He grabbed the fluffiest towel he could find for added comfort and dried himself with it, before he went to put on some underwear, sweatpants and a comfy sweater he’d feel a little safer in.

He took a long, good look at his bed, before sighing deeply and putting all of it in the washer, really wanting to wash all that night’s filth and shame away. He finally headed downstairs and, after realizing that 7.30am was probably too early to call Pierre, went to make breakfast.

As Charles fixed his breakfast, he once again found himself lost in thought about his dream. He really hadn’t ever had a wet dream before. Not about his ex, not about any of the other people he’d dated before. Not about Max either. This was the first, and it was quite the experience to say the least.

When Charles finished making his breakfast and looked down, he realized he’d been so preoccupied with the dream that he had pretty much exactly copied the fruit platter Max had made him in his dream. “Oh…” He said quietly, unsure as to exactly what that meant.

Pushing thoughts about that aside, at least for now, Charles quickly ate his breakfast. He retrieved his phone from his pocket, ignored the gigantic amount of e-mails and texts about the charity stream, and instantly called Pierre, putting his phone on speaker on the breakfast bar and his hands in his hair, his elbows on the bar as Charles stared at his phone and waited for Pierre to pick up.

After a couple more dial tones than usual, Pierre finally picked up, still sounding pretty sleepy. “‘Allo? Charles? Is something wrong, mate?” He asked, before letting out a pretty big yawn. Charles instantly felt guilty. It was too early to do this.

“I…fuck. Pierre, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have called you this early I just…I really need to talk to someone and I can’t call Arthur about this.” Charles said. His voice sounded a little broken, given that he had only gotten about 4 hours of sleep that night, and given the tone of his voice, Pierre instantly knew that brushing Charles off now would be a pretty bad idea.

“No Charles it’s fine just…give me a second to wake up.” Pierre told his friend. He put his phone down for a second, rubbed the sleep out his eyes, pushed a hand through his hair and took a deep breath, before he put the phone back to his ear. “Talk to me, mon frère.”

Ever since Pierre had put the phone down, Charles’ heartbeat had been steadily rising. How the fuck was he ever going to explain this to Pierre? Should he even mention Max? Should he just keep it as vague as possible? Fuck this was difficult. In the end, Charles decided to just be as open as he could be without getting into disgusting detail. Pierre was pretty much as close to him as either of his brothers. He knew everything about Charles. If anyone could help him, it was him.

“Pierre, so…something happened last night.” He finally said, resting his face against his hands. It was just easier to be open that way. “I had a dream. A weird dream. Of the kind I’ve never had before…” as Charles finished his sentence, Pierre started to chuckle and tried to lighten the mood a little. “Charles, you’re not calling me to say you’ve had your first wet dream, right?”

Charles stayed silent for a moment, before he let out a slightly shaky breath. “Well…” He mumbled, making Pierre’s laughter stop instantly. “Wait, what? Really? But that’s…is there something you’re not telling me here?” He asked Charles, who bit down hard on his lip as he considered his answer.

“It’s not the what of the dream, Pierre. It’s who it was with…” Charles closed his eyes as he spoke, and the whole sequence of Max feeding him fruit and giving him kisses played itself out again in his mind. “Pierre, I dreamt about Max.” He finally said, so quiet it was just above a whisper. 

“You…ooohhhh.” Pierre replied, unsure for a second about how to reply to that. “Well, but…wait. Just to be sure, we aren’t talking about the fact that it’s a guy, right? Just the fact that it’s Max?” Charles had come out years earlier to Pierre about being bisexual, but he still just wanted to be sure about what to focus on here.

Charles let out a humourless laugh and shook his head. “Just that it’s Max? Fucking hell Pierre. No. I mean, no it’s not about it being a guy, you know I’m bi. It’s just…it’s fucking Max. Why is it Max?” He asked. It was clear in his voice that Charles really was going through a crisis and he was in desperate need of a hug. 

“Pierre, I’ve never had a dream like that before. About anyone. And the worst thing is that I…I loved it. Not…like…not just the wet part. I mean before. We were cuddling and kissing and it just felt so fucking right. I can’t stop thinking about it. I haven’t slept for a second since, Pierre. I’m so fucking scared of what it means. I can’t fucking have a crush on Max. I just…I just can’t.”

Pierre waited patiently for Charles to finish his rant, before he carefully considered his answer. “Why not?” He finally asked gently. “Why would it be so wrong for you to have a crush on Max?” Charles once again laughed dryly and let out a long and deep sigh. “Ooohhh, you mean besides the fact that he hates me, is probably not into guys to begin with and is probably going to be one of my biggest rivals for a world title in the coming years? Not so much really.” He replied sarcastically.

Pierre chuckled softly at Charles and smiled a little as he listened to his friend. “Well I’m glad you haven’t lost your sense of humour, mon frère.” He teased, before he turned to a more serious answer. “You know I’ve spent some time working pretty closely with Max last year. And I also spend a lot of time with you, since I love you like you’re my own brother. I have seen the way Max has looked at you, Charles. I don’t know if he actually knows it yet, but there’s at least some mutual interest there, trust me. And the whole rivalry thing? Fuck that. Every self-help book in the world always tells you to keep your work life and private life separate. So that’s the last thing you should be worrying about.”

Charles listened closely to Pierre, and it helped to at least lessen some of his worries. Even if it was okay to be true though, whether it was actually true was still gnawing at the back of Charles’ mind. “Pierre?” He asked quietly. “Do you think that I actually have a crush on Max?”

Pierre sighed softly in response. “I’ll be honest, Charles. I…suspected something like this for at least a little while now. It hasn’t been super obvious, but I know you well enough to see the little signs. Your eyes linger on him whenever you see him. Whenever he talks to you, you lose your words a little. You fucking always talk about him. Even when he doesn’t have anything to do with what we’re talking about.”

Charles winced at Pierre’s response and shook his head. “Fuck. What the hell did I get myself into?” He asked, still finding it incredibly difficult to process and accept this. “Take some time for yourself today, Charles. Try and relax a little and do something you enjoy to feel better, alright? You need to take care of yourself, maybe take a bit of a nap too if you can.” Pierre told him. If he could, he would’ve already been in the car to go and visit his friend, but that was impossible in this lockdown. “Can Arthur maybe come over to keep you company?”

“No.” Charles instantly replied. “I don’t want to bother Arthur with this. He has his own things to deal with and it’s…it’s all still just bullshit. Thank you for listening though. It really means a lot, Pierre.” Pierre smiled softly at Charles’ words and decided to not push the subject any further. “Anytime, Charles. Promise to call me whenever you feel bad. I’m always here for you.”

“I promise.” Charles said quietly, and finally smiled a little again. “This really helped, Pierre. I think I might go and take a nap and have a good workout after.” Pierre smiled in return and nodded softly. “I think that’s a great idea. Send me at least a tekst later today, I worry and I want to hear from you.”

Charles easily agreed to that and said his goodbyes to Pierre, before he finally ended the call. The call had lasted quite a long time, so his laundry was pretty much done, too. He put his bed in the dryer and put all fresh sheets onto his bed, before he laid down in it and quickly drifted off into a blissful, dreamless sleep, sufficiently reassured by the call with Pierre.

When Charles finally woke up again, the time had just crossed noon. He stretched himself out and sleepily started to finally go through the e-mails and messages on his phone. The incredible amount of positive messages really made waking up a lot better than it usually was.

Charles wouldn’t be Charles though, if his eyes weren’t automatically drawn to the negative tweets he was getting, calling him a cheater; a bad racer, and so, so much worse. It instantly brought Charles’ mood down again. He stayed in bed for another half an hour or so, going through his tweets and even liking a number of particularly creative insults.

When he finally got out of bed, he decided that it was time for his workout. Not just to keep himself in shape, but also because it usually helped him to sort his thoughts. He put on some shorts, socks, shoes, a tanktop and a bandana to keep his hair in place, before he went to his training room, jumping on his treadmill and going for a high intensity run.

He was about 45 minutes into his hour long run, when the doorbell suddenly started ringing. Which was…weird. Charles had already had his groceries delivered the day before, and he wasn’t expecting Arthur to come over. Besides, the sound he heard was from his actual door, not from the front of the building, so they would’ve already been inside.

Charles stopped the treadmill and grabbed his towel. He dabbed his face a little and took a glance at himself in the mirror as he walked by. He looked like an absolute fucking mess, if he said so himself. His hair was everywhere, he was glistening with sweat, and the tanktop had stuck so much to his torso that it had basically become skin tight. Oh well, it was probably just a neighbour anyway, so Charles didn’t mind much. 

He quickly closed the distance to the front door and swung it open. The person standing on the other side made Charles gasp, his eyes going almost impossibly wide in shock. Fuck. Why the fuck was he mid-work out. Why did he look like such a mess. How the fuck did he even get past the building’s security? Charles was only ripped away from his rollercoaster of thoughts when the other person started to speak. 

“Hey,” Max said with a soft smile. “Your security let me in when they recognized me, I hope you don’t mind. Could I come in to talk?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time: What is Max doing there? Will Charles die from shock? Will they start making out?  
> Find out at the next update!


	5. An Unexpected Visitor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhhh things are happening. People talk. Also other stuff. Enjoy! (Hopefully)

“Hey,” Max said with a soft smile. “Your security let me in when they recognized me, I hope you don’t mind. Could I come in to talk?”

Charles couldn’t believe what was happening here. Max had never been to his place before. Ever. Charles didn’t think he would even know where it was. And now he was here, one night after their public fight and Charles’ very much more private dream. What the fuck did it mean? Was he here to apologize? To fight some more? To take Charles into his strong arms and kiss him until he felt lightheaded? Fuck. Lose those thoughts Charles, not now.

He couldn’t help it though. While Charles thought he himself looked like an absolute mess, Max looked his very best, like he had just walked off a freaking photoshoot or something. He had his hair styled like it was just messy enough to look hot, and he was wearing a dark, navy coloured jacket with rolled up sleeves over a tight white shirt, some fitting ankle height jeans and white sneakers that looked brand new. He looked like a picture and Charles had to hold back from actually telling him so.

Charles only realized he hadn’t actually said anything and had really just been staring at Max when the man cleared his throat and stared at him a little awkwardly. “Sooo…?” He asked Charles, who was finally quick to step aside. “Y-yeah, come in. Sorry I’m looking such a mess, I was just in a workout and my mind is still there.” He told Max, who smiled at Charles as he walked into his apartment.

“That’s alright, Charlie. We all have to keep in shape after all.” Max replied easily. “Can we sit down somewhere so we can talk?” He asked, as he looked around the apartment and whistled a little. “Damn, this place is pretty spectacular.”

“Thanks.” Charles said with a small, unsure smile. “It was my family’s, I inherited it.” He explained to Max, walking him to the kitchen. “Uhm, we can sit down here at the table. I’m just gonna quickly freshen up, would you like something to drink?”

Max looked Charles up and down for a second, before he finally nodded softly and sat down at the table. “Yeah. I’ll take some water, thanks.” Charles noticed how Max was taking him in and felt fucking seen. It only increased his need to go change his clothes and freshen up.

He quickly got Max a bottle of water and shot back over to his bedroom, grabbing some jeans and a shirt and heading into the bathroom. He quickly splashed some water in his face and texted Pierre, before putting on the other set of clothes. “PIERRE. MAX IS HERE ‘TO TALK’. WHAT THE FUCK DO I DO?!”

Charles had barely managed to put his shirt on before Pierre was calling him. He quickly picked up and had to remind himself to keep his voice hushed so Max wouldn’t hear anything. “Pierre! I just…I was working out and I heard the door and it was fucking Max and he’s now sitting in my kitchen and he wants to ‘talk’. What the fuck does that mean?!” He asked his friend.

“Relax, Charles. Relax. Breaaaaaathe.” Pierre chided, chuckling a little at just how freaked out Charles was. “I mean, I don’t know either why he’s there, but you won’t really know until you talk to him, right? So maybe go and try that. How have you managed to get away and call me anyway?” 

“So uhm. I went to freshen up and I’m about halfway through changing clothes now…” Charles answered, making Pierre laugh. “Oohhhh, so you went to quickly make yourself looking prettier for Max.” He teased, causing Charles to groan in return.

“That’s not…I don’t…fuck you.” He grumbled. “I just felt disgusting and sweaty.” Charles told Pierre. “I…fuck, I can’t leave him alone too long. I’m gonna put some pants on and talk with him and I’ll call you after.”

“Alright, mon frère. Good luck and don’t do anything you might regret later.” Pierre told his friend, before he ended the call. Charles finally put on his pants and made his hair look somewhat presentable, before he finally returned to the kitchen for his talk with Max. 

To his shock, he found the kitchen empty. Panicking, he started running around and finally found Max in the living room, admiring his trophy cabinet. “Oh, there you are.” Max said when Charles finally returned to him. “Took your sweet time there.” He commented with a soft chuckle.

A small blush appeared on Charles’ cheeks at the accusation and he hummed softly, but ignored the comment. “We can sit down here to talk if you’d like, Max.” He offered, sitting down on the couch himself. Max lingered a moment, looking at another of Charles’ pole position trophies, before he sat down in a chair across from Charles.

“So I’m sure you’re pretty confused as to why I’ve come over to talk to you.” Max said and chuckled softly. “I mean, it’s not like I’ve been here before. Well, I’m here because I wanted to apologize for my reaction last night. We were just playing a game and raising money for a really good cause. Even though I didn’t agree with the way you drove, it’s not like we were out on track in a real race. So….I’m sorry, Charlie.” 

Charles just stared at Max for a really good while. This was the absolute last thing he would ever expect Max to say to him. It was completely, utterly out of character for him to ever admit any mistake, let alone apologize for his actions. “Did someone put you up to this? Lando? George? Alex?”

Max frowned at the accusation and looked a little disgruntled. “No. Of course nobody else put me up to this.” He lied. Lando had been pestering him ever since the stream ended to play nice and make up with Charles. “I just felt bad for yelljng at you for those unfair moves after you organised all of the stream and got everyone involved and everything. That’s part of why I donated so much. To say sorry and show my appreciation.” 

He gave Charles a genuine, sweet smile then, but it wasn’t returned. Instead, as competitive as he was, Charles could only manage to focus on one part of Max’s words. “That’s not an apology.” He stated as he stared Max down. “That’s one of those, ‘I’m sorry if you were offended’-bullshit non-apologies. You’re still saying my moves were unfair? I never race unfairly, Verstappen.”

Max’s smile faded with the change of tone from Charles and he narrowed his eyes a little. “Yes your moves were unfair, Charlie. You squeezed me in Australia and you fucking pushed me off at turn four in Brazil! That’s not fair racing, that’s just being a terrible loser.” 

Feeling his blood starting to boil, Charles stood up. All of his earlier feelings for Max suddenly flew out the window as his quick to anger racing heart took over. “Are you fucking kidding me?! Those were valid defensive moves! You are the one with the crashing problem here, Crashtappen! Or did you somehow manage to forget that?”

Max jumped up from his chair too and stood threateningly close to Charles as he yelled at him. “I fucking knew it was a mistake to come here. I never should’ve let fucking Lando convince me it would be a good idea for us to make up. You’re just another arrogant, loudmouth, little rich boy whose daddy didn’t tell him ‘no’ enough times in his little life!”

Charles balled his fists then and looked like he was about to punch Max right in the face. “Don’t you dare say another fucking word about my father, you absolute piece of shit.” He wasn’t even yelling anymore. His mind had turned to pure anger and somehow his voice sounded almost calm as he stared into Max’s eyes. 

They stared into each other’s eyes for what felt like eternity, before Max finally opened his mouth again. “You know what, Charlie?” He asked, his voice sounding a lot smoother and quieter than before as he had a second to filter his thoughts.. “What, Verstappen? What could you possib-“ Charles was cut off completely mid-sentence, as out of nowhere, he suddenly found Max’s lips pressed aginst his own.

Max had one hand around Charles’ neck, and the other in the hair at the back of his head, pulling him in closer. Charles didn’t even realize it at first, as he was just in complete and utter shock at this turn of events, but he almost immediately found himself desperately kissing Max back.

It was so heated, still so filled with anger, with emotion, with uncertainty, but Charles never fucking wanted this to end. He wrapped his arms around Max’s neck and allowed the Dutchman to deepen the kiss, to get access to his mouth, to hold him tightly in his arms and never fucking let him go again.

Fuck. What was this though? What the hell were they doing? Was it real? Was it just a fit of passion? Was this leading to anything more? Should they even be doing this?

Apparently Max had the same thoughts, as he pulled away as suddenly as he had started kissing Charles. He tried to slow his heavy breaths and wiped his mouth, before he glanced at Charles, who looked like a deer caught in the headlights. “Fuck…” Max mumbled. “I…fuck. I’m so sorry Charles, I shouldn’t have. But you looked so…and I….fuck. I gotta go.” 

Max practically ran out of the room and the apartment, leaving Charles standing in the exact same spot until the loud sound of the front door slamming closed reverberated through the apartment and Charles was brought back to the world of the living.

He gingerly touched his lips before licking them. He wasn’t 100% sure that had really just actually happened, but he could still taste Max’s breath mint on his tongue. All of a sudden, his body felt incredibly heavy and Charles just sank back down onto the couch, staring ahead at the wall, unsure of what to do, to say or to feel. This wasn’t what he expected. This wasn’t what he expected at all.

They were yelling, fighting, Charles had been so angry he wanted to punch Max in the face and instead the Dutchman just…kissed him. What the fuck did it mean? Was Max into him, too? Was he just overcome with emotion and passion? Did he regret it? Would he maybe like to do it again…? Fuck, this was going to become a freaking nightmare.

Max started cursing as soon as he closed the door of Charles’ building behind him. “Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuuuuuuuuuck. You stupid fucking idiot, Max!” He told himself, slamming the wheel a couple of times as he got back into his car.

He had his chance and he fucking blew it. Why the fuck did he always become so emotional while talking to Charles? Why did that stupid boy look so fucking hot when he was angry that Max just couldn’t resist kissing him? Why did he fucking run away like some freaking high schooler, afraid to kiss their crush and get rejected. Ugh. He was just such a fucking idiot. He drove home in complete silence, took the elevator up to his floor and completely collapsed onto the couch once he got to it.

Instantly calling Lando, he let out a long, annoyed groan the second he heard it was picked up. “Lando, mate. I fucking blew it. Again.” He mumbled against the couch pillow. “What’s that Maxy? You fucking blew him? Atta boy!” He said and chuckled a little to himself. “Come on then, talk do dr. Lando. Tell me what’s wrong.”

Max let out a long, deep sigh and turned onto his side, so he could actually talk to Lando. “So, like we talked about, I went over there to apologize for being a dick last night and to maybe bond a little. It basically went wrong as soon as he opened the door. He was mid-workout, so he was sweaty as fuck, and wearing a tanktop and a bandana and…he just looked fucking sinful, Lando. I wanted to kiss him right there.”

“Okay…so Maxy got a bit turned on by workout Charles. That’s nothing new though. Go on.” Lando said, making Max sigh again before continuing. “He invited me in and gave me something to drink, then went to freshen up and get changed. When he finally came back, we started talking, and that’s when things really went wrong.” 

Max needed a few seconds then to collect his thoughts, but Lando didn’t interrupt him, not wanting to break his train of thought. He knew this must be really hard for Max to talk about, so he wanted to be supportive of his friend.

“I apologized to him for being an absolute asshole last night about a videogame, but I might’ve also mentioned that I still thought his moves were unfair?” Max said, making Lando groan. “Oh, Maxy. You know that our Charles doesn’t really do well with criticism.” He told his friend. 

“Yeah…” Max replied with a sigh. “Things kinda only escalated from there. We started yelling and at one point I was pretty sure he was going to punch me in the face.” Max explained to Lando. “And so that’s when you left?” Lando asked for good measure.

“No…that’s when I kissed him…” Max mumbled. “You fucking WHAT?!” Lando yelled, making Max wince and hold the phone a little further away from his phone. “I concince you to go over there and make amends, so that you can start growing closer and finally fucking dating, and the first time you go and see him you KISS?! Max, honestly. Such a rookie error. I don’t even know what to say to this.”

“You’re supposed to help me!” Max replied, making Lando let out an annoyed groan. “How can I help you when you insist on sabotaging yourself?! Really Max, the only way you could’ve made this worse was if you’d kissed him and than just ran off like a loser.”

It stayed quiet for such a long time then that Lando figured out the answer to that one himself. “Noooooo. Maxy. Please tell me you didn’t do that…” He practically begged. “I…didn’t not do that…?” Max finally offered.

“You are fucking hopeless. That’s what you are. You have been talking to me about that boy for months now. Oh Lando he’s so pretty. Oh Lando, did you see his Armani photos? Oh Lando, do you think he maybe likes me too? And then I fucking help you and you still fuck it up!” He loved Max. He really did, but the boy was more than a little beyond hope when it came to love. Particularly with Charles.

“Landooooooo…” Max finally whined. “You have to help me. I don’t want to fuck this up any more than I already have.” Lando couldn’t help but laugh at that. “Honestly Maxy. I don’t know if you could if you tried. Only thing I see working here is if you go back over there, apologize in person for standing him up, and confess your feelings. That’s it. Don’t text, don’t call, in person. And thank god that you’re even allowed to go and see him in this pandemic crap.”

Max let out another deep sigh and finally nodded softly. “Yeah, okay. I’ll do that then…I’ll let you know after I go and see him, alright?” He asked. Lando agreed with that and after saying their goodbyes, they finally ended their phonecall.

Max took a deep breath, making in a decision in his mind. Lando was completely right. He had fucked up so bad that he really only had one move left to try. That night, he would go back to Charles and confess his feelings for him. Anything better than being stuck in this limbo of not knowing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time: Max going back to Charles? Rejection? Kissing? Love? Who knows.


	6. Through Despair and Hope

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a warning: Charles is in a pretty bad place in this chapter. Please find yourself some help if you ever have depressed thoughts. You are loved <3

Charles found himself sitting silently on the couch after Max left for a very long time, playing out the whole thing in his mind again and again and again. The kiss of course, was very prominent in it, but Charles was having a lot of trouble processing the things that Max had said while they were fighting and how he’d reacted afterwards.

He’d started off by telling Charles he never would’ve come to apologize if it hadn’t been for Lando pushing for him to do it. That wasn’t a great show of character in the first place. He then insisted that Charles was an unfair driver, which was just blatantly untrue. He wasn’t! Well, his move in Brazil might’ve not been the very cleanest of moves, but it certainly wasn’t an illegal one!

Worst of all though, was the last thing Max had said before he had kissed Charles. He had talked about his father. And that was something Charles couldn’t just get past. His father was his everything. The person he could always count on, no matter what. Losing him was without a doubt the worst thing Charles had ever had to deal with in his life. And Max had dared to spit on his legacy. It was practically unforgivable in Charles’ eyes.

And that kiss…it was everything Charles had dreamed of, literally. The passion, the way Max had held him, the taste of his lips on his own…It had made Charles feel so happy and complete. So for Max to then just pull away, say he didn’t mean it and run off, that made it so much worse.

Charles didn’t really know how to feel about everything that had happened. His head was filled with all these emotions, each fighting to come through the strongest. He felt confused and saddened about the way that Max had acted around him, he felt anger about the way Max had spoken to him, but he realized that most of all, he felt rejected. It felt almost like in that kiss, he had finally opened up to feelings that had been stirring underneath the surface for months. Like he was finally accepting that he had a big crush on Max Verstappen, and he was finally ready to go out and act on it. 

But instead of welcoming it, it felt to Charles almost like Max had tried him out, decided he wasn’t worth it, and thrown him away. The day before he didn’t even know for sure that he did like Max this way, and now he was sitting here, feeling like his heart was broken into tiny little pieces.

He hadn’t really noticed how much time had passed until he glanced at his phone, and saw that he had 17 missed messages and four missed calls from Pierre, who was obviously worried sick about his friend. Reluctantly, he picked up the phone and called the man back. He pulled his knees in to his chest as he sat on the couch and let out a shaky breath as he waited for the call to be answered.

Charles didn’t even remember the last time he had felt this small and vulnerable. He just really needed someone to sit with him and hug him right now, and that stupid fucking virus took that away from him too. When Pierre finally picked up, Charles let out a shaky breath before he spoke, closer to crying now than the anger that had engulfed him before.

“Hi Pierre.” He said timidly, even surprising himself with how weak and broken his voice sounded. “Oh…oh god, Charles. What happened, what did he do to you?” Pierre asked, immediately distressed, the worst possible scenarios shooting through his mind.

“We fought, Pierre.” Charles added quietly. “He said he came to apologize about last night, and then we fought about it and it got heated and…he said things about papa being a bad father, Pierre.” He had to swallow thickly even as he said the words, and his fucking breath just wouldn’t steady out as he sucked in a deep breath. Pierre was about to react, his mouth already open to tell Charles that he would kill Max if he ever spoke about Charles’ father again, but the boy continued.

“I…I was ready to punch him, Pierre. I was actually going to fight him over that, but then…then he suddenly kissed me. And I kissed him back. And it was the most amazing feeling I have ever felt in my life.” Saying all of these things out loud really brought them home for Charles, and he could feel the tears starting to well up in his eyes.

“But then he pulled away. He said that it was a mistake. That he shouldn’t have done it and…and he just left.” A tear slowly rolled down Charles’ cheek then, and he let out a little sniffle as he wiped it away. “I just don’t know anymore, Pierre. I’m just so confused. I feel so helpless, like he tried me out and threw me away again.”

Pierre listened to Charles talk, his heart shattering into tiny little pieces as he heard his friend’s sniffle. Charles was without a doubt one of the strongest people he knew. He had persevered through such immense hardship in his life that Pierre had been certain that there was nothing else that could take this boy down. Apparently he was wrong.

“Oh Charles. I am so, so sorry you have go through this.” Was the first thing Pierre said after Charles had finished talking. “You genuinely are the strongest, most capable person that I know. If there’s anyone that I know that can deal with all of this and come stronger out the other end, it’s you, mon frère.”

Charles let out another sniffle at Pierre’s words and wiped at the tears that just wouldn’t stop coming now. “I’m done fighting, Pierre. I’ve been fighting for so long, against so much loss and pain. I don’t know if the have the strength left to fight this battle, too.”

Pierre sighed deeply in response and shook his head. “I know it’s hard Charles. You just got your heart broken and it feels like you’ll never be put back together again. But you will be. And I’ll always be here for you to do my part. You can count on me. Any hour of any day.”

Charles nodded softly at Pierre’s words and could feel some of the tension leaving his shoulders. “I love you so much, Pierre.” He told his friend honestly. “You are the best friend I could ever wish for and so much more. I don’t know how I deserve you.”

Pierre chuckled a little at that response and smiled. “You deserve it by just being you, Charles. Your sweet, loving, strong, amazing self. Now here’s what you’re going to do. I know I can’t be there right now for you, but it’s good for you to do it anyway. I want you to get the cheatiest snack you have lying around in the house and eat all of it while watching the most nostalgic movie you can find to feel better, okay?”

“Okay…” Charles said quietly. “I don’t know how many snacks I have though…” he added with a small frown. “Well, your ex probably left some ice cream in the freezer, so eat that. I know it scares you, but once is fine, Charles.” Pierre said, trying to cheer Charles up with a little tease.

“Fine. Yeah, okay.” Charles finally said, a tiny smile appearing on his face as he considered just how grateful he was to have a friend as amazing as Pierre. “Thank you again, Pierre. Can I call you if I need to?” He asked, which Pierre was quick to jump on. “Like I said, Charles. Day and night, every hour of the day, whenever you need me. I’m here for you, promise.”

Charles really did feel a little better after his call with Pierre. Once they had said their goodbyes and ended the call, he finally got up from the couch. Seeing himself in a miror, he realized he didn’t have to be dressed up anymore, and so he went back to his bedroom, changing into his oldest, comfiest pair of sweats and sweater. The kind of which the colour on had long since faded, but you just kept holding on to, since they were the comfiest piece of clothing in the entire world.

He put on his glasses too, since he would be reading subtitles, and made his way back down to the kitchen. He rummaged around in the freezer for a little while, until he finally found what he was looking for; a tub of half eaten strawberry ice cream. 

He brought the entire thing along with him and curled back up on the couch underneath a blanket, putting on Jurassic Park on full volume, so that the beautiful music and dinosaur schreeches would at least drown out his own thoughts.

Annoyingly though, Charles hadn’t even managed to get to the “Welcome…to Jurassic Park.” Section of the movie, before the doorbell was ringing again. In his current mood, he decided to ignore it and just keep watching, but whoever it was insisted and just keep on ringing.

Letting out a loud groan in annoyance, Charles threw his soft, comfy blanket aside and walked over to the door, swinging it open “What i-….Max?” Charles was more than a little shocked to see the man back at his door, especially after the way he had left a few hours before. 

“Hi Charles. I…wow you look cute.” Max said awkwardly. “Those glasses look really cute on you.” Fuck. This was already going wrong. Max had spent a couple hours at home thinking about how to go at this the best, and it was already ruined by Charles looking the absolute cutest he probably ever had in his life.

Max had been planning to go over there and apologize profusely to Charles, explain that he was an absolutely gigantic idiot and most importantly, to finally come out for his feelings for the Monégasuqe. Instead, he was being a bumbling moron who couldn’t say anything more than how pretty Charles was.

Charles narrowed his eyes a little at Max and crossed his arms as he stared him down. “What do you care how I look? Or are you here to insult my looks too?” He asked the man. Max sighed deeply and shook his head. “No, that’s not why I’m here. I’m here to tell you, from the bottom of my heart, that I am sorry for the way that I treated you before. I panicked and I would really love to explain without insulting or offending or fighting with you if were to please let me in.”

Charles was very ready to stand up for himself here and send Max away, but he just couldn’t resist those piercing blue eyes staring into his own. “Fine…” He finally said, stepping aside. “But if you do or say anything to hurt me you will never set foot in this apartment again.”

Max nodded softly in response and gave Charles a relieved smile as he walked into the apartment. They made their way to the living room again, and instead of sitting down across from Charles, this time Max sat down next to him, with just a single seat separating them.

He looked around the room a little, and the partially eaten tub of ice cream, comfy blanket to the side, the movie still paused on the tv and the red around Charles’ eyes told Max everything he needed to know. “Oh fuck, Charles…I’m so sorry.” He said, nervously biting his lip a little. “I….fuck this is really hard for me.”

Max took a deep breath, and decided to just get it all out in one go, and deal with the consequences as they happened. “First of all, I am genuinely truly sorry. For how I acted, for the things that I said, and most of all for…kissing you without your permission. That was wrong of me. I…Charles. I like you. Like….a lot. I have for a while now. You’re gorgeous, you’re sweet, you’re smart and god, you’re just so passionate at everything you do. And I guess that when we were arguing it just kind of got the best of me and I couldn’t resist kissing you.” 

Max swallowed thickly. “So I guess what I’m trying to say is, I’m sorry for the way that I kissed you, but I’m not sorry that I did…and I would like to maybe do it again…” He went out on a limb here, risking everything. But the way Charles had kissed him back before…there was no doubt in Max’s mind that Charles felt something for him, too. He just hoped that he hadn’t ruined his chances for good.

Charles was absolutely breathless as he listened to Max talk. He wanted to instantly forgive him and start making out with him. He really, really fucking did. But he couldn’t. Not yet, at least. “There are some things we need to talk about first.” He said quietly, earning him a quick nod from Max. “Anything, Charles. Of course.” He quickly assured the Monégasque.

“You said earlier that the only reason you came here was because Lando forced you to apologize. Is that true?” Charles asked Max. He was sitting with his knees pulled in again, just feeling safer that way as he talked to Max. “Uhm…yes and no?” Max offered. “So…I’ve had a bit of a crush on you for quite a long time now and Lando knows. So time and time again he’s been trying to get me to act on it. So I guess he did give me the last push to come over today, but I would’ve come to you on my own at some point.”

Charles nodded softly at that answer. The situation was slightly different now anyway. “So…the other thing is what you said about my father…” He added quietly, closing his eyes on the last word to keep himself from crying again.

“Fuck…” Max mumbled underneath his breath. “Charles I…It was just something I said in the heat of things. I didn’t even realize what I’d said until it was already out there. I-I’m sorry. I didn’t want to offend his memory. I would never willingly do that. I know how much he means to you. I…I never want to hurt you, but you know how it is. When we race, we’re almost different people. Things are said and done, things that we regret after. But that isn’t me. This is. The Max that is sitting here in front of you, asking you if he can please give you a hug.”

Charles kept his eyes closed until Max finished speaking. Once Max was done, he finally slowly opened them and dropped his knees down from the couch, before he nodded softly. “Okay.” Max smiled a relieved smile then, and moved to sit down right next to Charles. He took the boy in one last time, before he gently wrapped his arms around his torso and pulled him into a hug.

Charles couldn’t help but sigh the moment Max’s arms closed around him. He could feel all the tension leaving his body in that sigh, and he desperately hugged Max back, melting completely into it. “Why are you such an idiot?” He asked the Dutchman. “You could’ve just kissed me and not insulted me or ran away and we wouldn’t have had to go through this.” He mumbled into Max’s shoulder as they cuddled together. 

Max chuckled softly in return and gently rubbed Charles’ back. “I’m sorry, Charlie. I’ll try and make it up to you, I promise.” He whispered into his ear. He gently pulled away from the hug and used his index finger to tip Charles’ head up a little, looking into his eyes. “So how about that kiss now then?” He asked, making Charles finally smile for what felt like the first time in forever. “My pleasure.” The Monégasque whispered, closing the distance between their lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaahhhhhhh we made it you guys. Our boys <3  
> We have earned some fluff after going through all this, so expect that next time...or not, we’ll see!


	7. Kisses in the Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, this is absolute pure fluff and no, I will not apologize for it. I think all of us, and especially poor, precious, sweet Charles deserve a bit of a break. Hope you enjoy!

Charles felt bold as he leaned in and kissed Max, but it was absolutely worth it. This kiss could not be more different than their first one. It was soft and gentle, like was Max afraid he would hurt Charles again if he kissed him too roughly. “It’s okay, Max. I’m not gonna break.” He whispered. “You can actually kiss me like you mean it.”

Max hunmed softly in return to Charles and managed to lift the Monégasque up to sit in his lap. “I know, Charlie.” He said quietly. “But I already hurt you today, so I want to be as careful as I can be to just make you happy.” He gave Charles a sweet smile and started into the boy’s eyes as he carefully caressed his cheek. “Thank you for kissing me.” He added with a soft hum. “Have I told you yet how fucking adorable you look in this outfit? 

Charles chuckled softly in return and shook his head as he smiled down at Max. “No, you haven’t. But I’d love to hear more actually.” He replied happily, his arms moving up to loosely wrap around Max’s neck. “Hmmmm, well, first of all, you look like the cuddliest boy in the whole world in those big sweatpants and sweater. Your hair is just messy enough to be cute as fuck and my god. Those glasses. You are so incredibly fucking cute in those glasses. And the best thing is; they make those beautiful green eyes of yours even bigger and prettier.” 

Charles sighed happily as Max finished talking and kissed the boy again, holding him a little tighter as they lazily made out. “Thanks for coming back, Max.” He said quietly, making Max smile back. “I was afraid I had already ruined my chances.” Charles nodded softly at that and pecked Max’s lips before he answered. “I think you would have if you hadn’t come back and apologised the way that you did.” He said honestly.

Charles had been in such a bad place before Max returned that the more he thought about it, the more he thought he might’ve gotten stuck in jt. The whole pandemic situation had already had such an impact on Charles’ mental state that this might well have been the thing that would’ve sent him over the edge to a very bad place. He was still in a very vulnerable place though, and so he was so happy Max seemed to notice that and adjust his acts on it.

“Then I’m really glad I stopped being a dumb idiot for just long enough to get to kiss you again.” Max told Charles, and pressed their lips together again. They made out for another couple of minutes, until Charles pulled away and nuzzled his face a little into Max’s neck. “Will you stay for a while? We can watch the rest of the movie together, I’d barely gotten started with it.”

“Of course I will, Charlie. Max easily agreed to Charles’ proposal. “I mean, it’s not like I was planning on letting you go anytime soon now that I finall ly get to hold you in my arms and do this.” As he spoked he leaned in and kissed Charles again, licking hi slips as he pulled away. “Mmmm, real good strawberry ice cream.” He said with a bright smile, making Charles laugh a little.

Charles stayed in place and cuddled with Max for another few minutes, before he finally decided to get things ready for them to watch the rest of the film together. He got off of Max’s lap and got both of them some water to drink in case they got thirsty. He then ordered Max to take his shoes off and get comfy on the couch, after which Charles curled up against his side and draped his blanket over the both of them. “There.” He said, and gave Max just the cutest smile as he laid his head down against the Dutchman’s chest.

Max chuckled softly as he watched Charles and placed a gentle kiss on the top of his head. “You are so fucking cute.” He told him quietly. He wrapped his arms snugly around the waist of the boy cuddled up against him and hummed softly as they settled in their place on the couch together. “You can start the movie now, Charlie.” He whispered.

Charles did just that. He made himself as small as he could in Max’s arms and pressed play. This was everything Charles had wished for. He was in the arms of the man he really liked, being held close. He felt so pleased, so happy, and so freaking comfortable. Like he could just close his eyes and sleep there forever. In fact, after snuggling with Max for a good ten minutes or so, Charles could start to feel his eyelids getting heavier and heavier. He fought it for a little while, but in the end, this was a battle that he just couldn’t win. He let out a couple of small yawns and finally completely gave in, falling into a deep, peaceful sleep in Max’s arms. 

Max was fully aware of this, of course. He really only had eyes for Charles anyway, the movie was just some entertaining background noise to their cuddling. He waited for a few minutes as Charles fell asleep, before he very gently took off the boy’s glasses and put them aside, not wanting them to get damaged. He turned the volume down on the tv too, not wanting a random dinosaur to wake Charles up, and spent the rest of the movie’s runtime holding Charles’ hand and gently caressing it as the Monégasque slept soundly against his side.

God, he was so beautiful, even as he slept. He had this look on his face, somewhere between a small smile and a frown. Whatever it was, Max thought that Charles looked absolutely angelic. As he looked down at the sleeping boy in his arms, Max felt another pang of guilt, still feeling so fucking guilty for hurting his Charles, and sure he would be spending a long time making up for it.

Charles continued to sleep even after the movie had ended, and Max didn’t have the heart to wake him up, so he just stayed there, placing gentle kisses atop Charles’ head every so often. He even thought about taking a picture to send to Lando to show him that he had actually freaking done it, but ultimately decided against it. This was a private moment, and it would stay that way.

The movie had been over for about half an hour when Charles finally started to stir. He turned around in Max’s arms and nuzzled into his chest, making Max chuckle softly. “Goodmorning, gorgeous.” He said quietly. He held the boy a little closer and kissed his head a few times, humming softly. “Do you want me to take you to bed, Charlie?” He whispered.

Charles groaned in response and shook his head. “No. Wanna stay with you.” He mumbled. Max smiled sweetly down at Charles in return and nodded. “Okay, Charlie. I’ll stay a little longer.” He assured the boy, letting him wake up slowly on his own.

Charles finally stretched himself out a little and opened his eyes to look up at Max. “Hey.” He whispered, earning himself a chuckle from the Dutchman. “Hey there, sleepyhead.” Max whispered in return. “I’m sorry I fell asleep, Max. I just…you felt really comfy and I was sleepy.” He mumbled as he blushed.

“Oh that’s more than okay, Charles. You’ve been through a lot today and it was really nice having you in my arms like this.” Max admitted with a sweet smile. Charles let out a happy little laugh and turned to look at the tv. “Oh shit, the movie is over already?” He asked, before he gasped softly. “Oh god, what time is it…?” He asked, staring up at Max, who hummed soffly.

“Oh, it’s only 11.30. Why, do you another appoin-Oh fuck. Fuuuuuck, the curfew.” Max said with a groan. “Fuck, I’m sorry Charles. I should’ve remembered. I…shit. Can I stay here for the night..?” Max really felt bad asking. They really weren’t at the sleeping over point of their relationship yet. Or…whatever they were calling this now.

Charles swallowed thickly at the question, all kinds of images from his dream shooting through his mind once again. “Y-yeah, of course you can spend the night. Would you…uhm. You should probably stay in the guest bedroom, right?” Charles asked. He sat up a little on his own, still covering himself with the blanket as he rubbed at his eyes. “Yeah, that would probably be best.” Max agreed, not wanting to push things along too quickly.

Charles finally got up from the couch and offered Max his hand with a small smile. “Yeah, come on then, I’ll take you to your room for the night.” Smiling, Max got up too and took Charles’ hand. “Thank you very much, gorgeous.” He told the Monégasque and easily went along with him. Charles guided him over to his guest bedroom and showed Max in. “Well, here we are. The guest bedroom…which you will be staying in…without me.”

Max couldn’t help but laugh a little at how silly Charles was being and pulled him in for another kiss. “Charlie. Are you very subtly telling me that you would really like for me to come and join you in your bed?” He asked the boy as he pulled away. 

“I…yes, please.” Charles told Max, giving him a soft smile. “But like…not for doing stuff or whatever. I just really liked sleeping in your arms and I kinda want more of it if that’s okay.” He really, really wanted Max to come with him, but he didn’t think he was ready to go beyond that yet, not like in his dream.

Max pretended to consider the offer for a second or two, before he finally sighed deeply. “Well, I guess I’ll just come with and hold the most gorgeous boy in the entire world as he sleeps in my arms. The things I do for you Charlie.” He said with a grin. 

Charles fondly rolled his eyes and took Max’s hand again, pulling him along to the master bedroom as he silently thanked whatever god was out there that he had changed all of his sheets earlier that day. “I sleep on the left side.” He informed Max, as he pulled his sweater off and started to pull down his sweatpants, too. “Oh…is this okay? I normally sleep in just my underwear, is that alright?”

From the moment Charles had started to undress himself, Max had been staring at him, unable to look away. How Charles went from absolutely adorable to fucking sex icon the moment he took off hjs sweater was beyond Max, but he absolutely loved it. He opened his mouth to answer Charles, but found it had gone a little dry. “Y-yeah, that’s absolutely fine with me, gorgeous.” He finally answered. “I do the same.”

With a bright smile, Charles finally pulled his sweatpants off and quickly crawled into bed, getting comfy and not at all staring at Max as he undressed. Max was still wearing his expensive clothes from earlier that day, so he was a little more careful than Charles, who had just thrown his clothes to the side. He folded up his pants and put his shirt and jacket on a hanger, before he crawled into bed next to Charles and leaned over, giving him a small peck on the lips. 

“Well…I didn’t think I’d end up in here when I woke up this morning.” Max stated with a bit of a chuckle. “But I certainly don’t mind it at all.” Charles hummed softly and moved in closer as Max got comfortable in bed. He put his head down on the man’s chest and closed his eyes for a second as he listened to Max’s heartbeat. “I really like it tbat you’re, too.” He said quietly, letting out a pleased sigh as once again, Max’s arms found their way around his waist. 

Max very gently caressed the soft skin of Charles’ waist as he held him and placed a kiss on top of his head every so often as they cuddled together. “Bit of a strange first date though, wasn’t it?” He asked quietly as he started to chuckle a little. Charles giggled softly in response and smiled a cute smile up at Max. “Is that what this is now then? Are we dating?”

Max smiled down at Charles in response and managed to lean down just enough to place a kiss on his lips. “I would like us to be.” He said quietly. “I would absolutely love nothing more than to call you my boyfriend.” He added, giving Charles another kiss.

“I…I would really like that, too.” Charles said quietly, his fingers gently dancing over Max’s bare chest as he laid there in his arms. “I can’t believe this is actually happening. It feels almost like a dream.” Max chuckled softly and grinned as he thought of a funny joke.”I might be the man of your dreams, but I’m very much real, Charlie.” He said, as Charles groaned loudly.

“Oh god…what did I get myself into? Goodnight Maxy. I’ll see you in the morning.” He replied, closing his eyes. “Goodnight Charles,” Max whispered in response. “I’ll see you tomorrow. I’ll even make you breakfast in bed. How do a fruit platter and waffles sound to you? It’s my cheat day after all.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that was amazing to write. Like I said, I looooooove me some well deserved fluff. Our sweet babies. Finally together like they should be forever and ever <3
> 
> Next time: More fluff...? Less fluff...? Smut...? You’ll find out!


	8. A Dream Come True

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: this chapter contains quite a lot of smut. Skip the second half if you’re uncomfortable with that. Thanks for reading as always!

Charles woke up the next morning in practically the same position he had gone to sleep in. Max was still holding him protectively close in his arms, and Charles felt like he had had his best night of sleep in a very long time. He also was the kind of person who got very cold in the morning, so he snuggled in a little closer to Max and placed a small kiss on his chest as he pulled the duvet up a little higher, almost covering his entire head.

Max was still sleeping soundly, and a bit creepy as it was, Charles just couldn’t resist watching him as he laid there in the man’s arms. He looked so relaxed as he slept, so carefree, and Charles just loved the tiny little smile that showed on Max’s face as he dreamt. He leaned up then, placing a gentle kiss on those soft lips and staying close by in case his boyfriend, was that official now?, wanted more kisses as he woke up. 

The kiss from Charles did trigger Max, and his eyes slowly started to blink open as his arms tightened a little around the Monégasque’s waist. “Well goodmorning to you too, gorgeous.” He mumbled sleepily, smiling a tired smile Charles’ way. “Too impatient to kiss me that you just couldn’t let me sleep?” He asked with a soft hum.

Charles let out a happy little laugh at Max’s accusation and shrugged. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Maxy. Am I not allowed to kiss my boyfriend whenever I want to?” He asked and hummed softly. He was running a slight risk by using the word boyfriend, but it felt less awkward than to just ask outright what the hell they should be labeling this.

Max hummed softly in return and finally smiled at Charles. “Well that does sound very reasonable.” He agreed as he leaned down and kissed Charles’ forehead. “But only if it counts the other way around as well.”

Charles was quick to nod and placed another kiss on Max’s chest for added effect. “I absolutely love it every time you kiss me, Maxy. So yes please, whenever you want to.” Max grinned down at Charles in response to his answer and gently started to play with the boy’s hair as he woke up fully.

“Have I told you how pretty you’re looking yet? Because holy shit Charles. Early morning you might be the sexiest thing I have ever seen in my life.” Charles was looking absolutely sinful in Max’s eyes, and he could only barely resist acting on it. “Your hair is looking even more wild and untamed than usual, the slight stubble on your face only works to accentuate your already unfairly handsome face and in the early morning sunlight, your eyes seem to shine an even deeper shade of green.”

Charles simply smirked in return and let his fingers trace over Max’s chest again, tracing his pecs and abs as he sighed happily. “Right back at you, Maxy.” He told his boyfriend. He hummed softly as a thought entered his mind, and within a second, he was acting on it. He gently undid Max’s embrace around his waist and sat up, throwing his right leg over Max’s thighs to straddle the Dutchman. 

He sat up then, his weight resting on Max’s thighs before he leaned down and kissed his boyfriend deeply, a hand already in Max’s hair to play with it as they made out. “Mmmm, Charlie? What are you doing exactly?” Max mumbled against Charles’ lips, as his arms instantly found their way around his boyfriend’s waist again.“You aren’t trying to seduce me, are you?”

Charles pulled back to look down at Max and pulled an impressive faux-offended face. “Who, me? No, of course not. I’m simply admiring my incredibly sexy and handsome boyfriend and making out with him super platonically.” He told the man, giving him an innocent smile that made Max laugh.

“God, you’re so fucking manipulative.” Max said, smiling up at Charles as he gave his boyfriend’s ass a cheeky little squeeze. “But I can’t say that I don’t love having you on top of me, having this gorgeous body and pretty face all to myself.” 

Max was about to go further, his hand already placed on the waistband of Charles’ boxers, when both of their stomachs started rumbling at almost the exact same time. At that, Max put his hand back where it originally was around Charles’ waist and looked up at the man for a second, before leaning up and kissing him again. “I hate asking this, but if you move off of me I can go and make your breakfast, babe.”

Charles hummed softly at Max’s question and smiled down at him. “And if I stay right here and don’t move at all, does that mean I can get Max Verstappen as my breakfast?” He asked. Max started chuckling at that and kissed his boyfriend again. “Nope. I’m taking care of you here, and I’m saying you’re gonna have to eat an actual breakfast. Then afterwards we can stay in bed for as long as you like and maybe you can have me for lunch.” He said and winked. 

With a loud, very much disagreeing groan, Charles finally rolled off of Max and looked at him with a bit of a pout. “Fine. But you better make that breakfast really fucking good, Verstappen.” He added, narrowing his eyes a little. 

Max fondly rolled his eyes at Charles and leaned over to peck his pouty lips one last time, before he crawled out of bed and stretched out all of his limbs. He thought for a second, before he finally grabbed Charles’ sweatpants from the night before and put them on. “I’m borrowing these.” He informed the Monégasque, who just nodded in response, his mouth still a little dry from staring at his half naked boyfriend.

Max winked at Charles one last time, before he finally left the room and headed to the kitchen to make them some breakfast. He had barely left the room before Charles was reaching for his phone, absolutely dying to tell Pierre about this. He smiled when he noticed that he already had a few concerned texts from the Frenchman, asking about his wellbeing, and he instantly pressed the call button.

“Bonjour Charles! How are you, mon frère? Feeling any better?” Pierre asked as he answered the call. “Oh my god, Pierre. So much has happened. Good things. I-I don’t even know where to start!” Charles replied, incredibly excited to tell him what had happened.

Pierre chuckled as he heard Charles’ excitement, it was a big relief. “Why don’t you just start at the beginning, Charles? And go from there.” Charles nodded softly, and finally just started to talk. “So, last night, I did exactly as you said. I got some ice cream and a blanket and I started watching Jurassic Park when the doorbell rang. And…it was Max. He’d come back to apologize. He was so sweet and kind and he explained everything and I forgave him. And then he asked if he could kiss me again, Pierre. He said that he had feelings for me and we kissed and we kissed and we kissed. And then I asked him to watch the rest of the movie with me. Only…I kinda fell asleep in his arms and I didn’t wake up until past curfew….so he had to spend the night here. And I may have kind of invited him to sleep in my bed with me so we could cuddle. But nothing else happened!”

Pierre listened to everything Charles said. It was a lot to say the least, and the only thing he managed to think of at the end was “Wait…where is he now then? Did Max go home?” He asked, making Charles giggle a little. “Uhm…so he’s kinda in the kitchen right now, making me breakfast in bed.”

“You have Max Verstappen in your kitchen right now making you breakfast in bed? Holy fucking shit Charles.” Pierre finally said. “I…I’m so happy for you. Are you…are you dating then?” Charles sighed happily just at the way he would now be able to answer that question and nodded. “Uhhu, we are. He even called me his boyfriend.” He replied with a grin. He heard footsteps then, and realized that Max was probably coming back. 

“Oh. Pierre, I gotta go. Maxy is returning with the food.” He told his friend, making Pierre laugh out loud. “Fucking Maxy?” He asked and smirked. “Oh you are so far gone my friend. Good luck!” They ended the call, and Charles quickly put his phone away before Max entered the room.

“So, I know that I promised you waffles…” Max said as he walked back into the room, carrying a tray of food and drink. “But you have the most difficult, futuristic waffle iron I have ever seen in my life….so I just made us a granola breakfast bowl for the diet freak in this room.”

Charles nearly beamed when Max informed him of breakfast and sighed happily. “You are an absolute angel, Maxy.” He said, moving his pillow so he could sit up against it and eat his breakfast. He did the same for Max and held the tray for him, so the Dutchman could come back into bed with him. 

Max crawled back into bed with Charles and moved close to his boyfriend’s side. He took the tray back and put it on his legs, before handing Charles a glass of juice and his breakfast bowl. “Here you go, gorgeous.” He started eating his food too then, feeling happy and comfortable in the silence with Charles.

Charles finished his breakfast first, and put his bowl and glass on the nightstand. He rolled onto his side then and hummed softly, gently running his fingers over Max’s abs. “I dreamt about this yesterday.” He admitted quietly.

Max stopped eating for a second and raised an eyebrow as he looked down at his boyfriend. “Oh?” He asked. “And what exactly happened in this dream if I might ask?” From the way Charles’ cheeks suddenly flushed and how he suddenly found staring at the sheets a lot more interesting than into his eyes, Max figured that it was something pretty good.

Charles cleared his throat a little and bit his lip, before he finally started to tell Max. “So, in my dream, we woke up together. We cuddled and made out and we were about to go further when you insisted on making me breakfast, just like today. But you promised that you would be mine afterwards, for whatever I wanted to do.” He told Max, finally looking back up into his eyes. 

“And so then after breakfast we did….continue.” He admitted, clearing his throat a little as he just cuddled closer to Max’s side. The boy in question was practically done eating anyway, so he put everything away and laid back down next to Charles, leaning in and kissing him softly.

“That sounds very fun.” Max whispered as he smiled at Charles. “Would that be something that you’d be interested in now, Charlie?” Ever since touching his ass before, Max had been more than ready to take this to the next level. He wanted Charles. All of him. He just didn’t want to do anything without getting specific consent from his boyfriend.

Charles hummed and nodded in response to Max, before kissing him deeply. “Yes, please.” He whispered against his boyfriend’s lips. Max grinned in response and kissed Charles back, before he rolled them over, leaving Charles on top of himself again. Without any hesitation, Max pushed a hand down underneath the waistband of Charles’ boxers and squeezed his boyfriend’s ass as he held him tight. “You’re so fucking hot, Charlie.” 

Charles moaned against Max’s lips as he felt the Dutchman’s hand on his ass. “Fuck, Max.” He mumbled in return. “I want you so bad.” He could feeling himself growing hard in his boxers, and he was only spurred on by how he could feel Max’s cock growing harder against him as well.

Max was gently kneading Charles’ ass with his fingers, and he pulled away from their kiss to look into his boyfriend’s beautiful eyes. He smirked a little when he noticed just how wide-blown Charles’ pupils were, and hummed softly. “Tell me what you want, Charlie.” He quietly told him. “How can I make you feel good?”

Charles stared into Max’s eyes. He was so fucking horny for his boyfriend, and he wanted everything that Max could possibly give him. He finally settled on an answer though, knowing just what he needed. “I want you inside me, Max.” He finally said.

Max let out a low moan at Charles’ words and pulled him a little closer. He was already so fucking hard, and Charles’ proposal made it almost feel painful. “Fuck, babe. I would fucking love that. Are you…are you sure?” He asked, making Charles nod quickly.

“Yes. I want you inside me, Maxy. Fuck me.” Charles said, which nearly sent Max over the edge then and there. “I will baby. I will make you feel so fucking good.” He promised his boyfriend. He rolled them back over, leaving Charles underneath him this time. He kissed Charles deeply one final time, before he moved down his boyfriend’s body, taking his boxers off and leaving him completely naked.

He got down between Charles’ legs, and pressed soft, teasing kisses on the boy’s thighs. “Do you have some lube and a condom for me to use, Charlie?” He asked. Charles was already panting a little. He was looking down at Max, so fucking close to his cock. He could barely think at all anymore. “I…uhm…it’s…this side.” He said, pointing over at the nightstand on his side of the bed.

Max chuckled at the way had he made Charles already fall apart, and he pressed a teasing kiss to the head of his boyfriend’s cock, before he finally got up. He rummaged through Charles’ nightstand and finally found what he was looking for. He threw both the lube and the condom onto the bed and quickly stepped out of his own boxers. “Like what you see, babe?” He asked with a wink, before he got back onto the bed.

“Roll over for me, love.” He told Charles with a sweet smile, pressing a kiss between the boy’s shoulderblades once he did. “God, even your ass is spectacular.” He said as he looked down at it. “So nice and round. I bet it looks even better once I’m inside it.” Charles let out a longing moan in return and tried to push Max downwards. “Maxy, please. Do something.”

“Patience, Charlie. Patience. I told you I’d take care of you and I will.” Max assured his boyfriend. He grabbed the lube and generously coated his fingers, before he moved to Charles’ ass, his index finger prodding at the Monégasque’s hole. “Now just relax, love. Be good for me.” He said, as he gently pushed in.

Charles gasped softly, because that lube was fucking cold, but he couldn’t shake the feeling that this was Max’s finger. Max fucking Verstappen was fingering his ass and was going to fuck him very, very soon. He let out a moan and wiggled his ass a little. “I’m a big boy, Max. I can take it. Now fucking hurry up and fuck me already.” He told his boyfriend.

Max whistled and smirked at Charles. “So bossy. But your wish is my command, love.” He told Charles, before he added another finger into his hole. He gently fingered him open, with Charles becoming more of a moaning mess with every thrust of his fingers.

After adding a third finger and Charles demanding again and again for Max to finally fuck him, he relented. “Alright baby, you’re ready.” He finally said. He rolled Charles back onto his back and grabbed the condom, ripping it open and putting it on his cock. He grabbed the lube again, making sure that he wouldn’t be hurting Charles too much, before he finally moved into position.

He grabbed Charles’ legs and put them on his shoulders, placing a kiss on his boyfriend’s ankle. He grabbed his cock, put it against Charles’ hole, and hummed softly. “Are you ready, gorgeous?” He asked, earning himself a loud groan from Charles. “Verstappen, if you ask me one more time whether I’m fucking ready I will fuckin-Ooohhhhh.” Max shut Charles up effectively, by finally pushing his cock into his boyfriend’s waiting hole. 

“Oh fuck, Maxy. Fuck, you’re big.” Charles moaned, only slightly regretting hurrying Max up. His boyfriend was big, but he could take it. Max was nearly breathless as he bottomed out. Charles just felt so insanely fucking good around him that he could barely believe it. “Feel so good, babe. So fucking sexy.” He told Charles.

He didn’t wait too long before he started to fuck Charles. Like he’d said, he was a big boy, he could take it. Max started to move his hips, pulling back and thrusting back into his boyfriend as he moaned deeply. He really wasn’t going to last long like this. Charles was feeling fucking incredible. It had felt a little uncomfortable at first, but having Max inside of him just started to feel better with every snap of the Dutchman’s hips.

“Fuck, Max. It feels so fucking good.” He told the man, reaching for him. “Kiss me, please.” He asked. Max didn’t need to be asked twice. He managed to lean down between Charles’ legs, folding his lover a little as he kissed him deeply. “You’re so amazing, Charlie. You feel so fucking good.”

Max kept on fucking Charles exactly like his boyfriend was asking him. After a little while, Max started to feel a familiar feeling in the pit of his stomach. “Fuck, Charlie. I’m gonna come.” He kissed the boy deeply again, and snapped his hips a final time, before he moaned deeply against Charles’ lips and came deep inside of him, filling up the condom.

Charles moaned along with Max and held on tightly to him as he felt his boyfriend coming inside of him. The feeling was incredible and it almost sent him over the edge, but Charles just wasn’t there yet. Max noticed of course, and continued to kiss Charles deeply, wrapping his fingers around the Monégasque’s cock and jerking him off. 

“Oh fuck, Max. Max, please.” Charles mumbled, almost begging Max for a release as he came closer and closer. “You’re doing so good, baby.” Max whispered back. “You’re gonna come for me, aren’t you? Gonna come after I fucked you so good.”

Charles gasped at Max’s dirty talk and could feel himself getting closer and closer. It only took a few more tugs from Max at his cock, before he moaned loudly, and almost screamed his boyfriend’s name as he came hard over his hand.

Charles almost instantly collapsed completely, completely spent after Max had taken such good care of him. Max wasn’t done yet though. He first licked his hand clean of Charles’ cum, before he finall pulled out. He threw the condom away, and got a wet washcloth from the bathroom, cleaning the both of them up a little before he crawled back into bed.

He noticed how spent Charles seemed, and so he collected his boyfriend in his arms and kissed him softly. “Thank you, love. You were absolutely incredible.” He said quietly. Charles hummed softly and nuzzled into Max, sighing happily. “You’re amazing.” He mumbled, feeling a little sleepy all of a sudden.

Max chuckled softly and kissed Charles’ head as he gently rubbed his back. “Sleep, my beautiful prince.” He whispered into his boyfriend’s ear. “I’ll be right here to watch over you.” Charles did just that. He let sleep take him, and finally drifted off with a sweet little smile plastered on his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! PSA: writing smut is awkward. Posting it even more so. Love you all very much <3


	9. The Morning After

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is just a nice, fun chapter. Not much plot, but a lot of cuteness <3  
> Thanks for reading!

Max looked on as Charles fell asleep and sighed happily. He held him nice and close and placed another kiss on top of his boyfriend’s head. He managed to reach over and grab his phone, taking a cute picture of the both of them together that would be excellent to tease Charles with. 

He went into his messages, and saw that he had…a lot of texts from Lando, ranging from “How did it go?” To “HOW DID IT GO?!” To “MAX FOR THE LOVE OF GOD TELL ME HOW IT WENT OR I WILL STOP BEING YOUR FRIEND.” He chuckled softly and shook his head as he read them, and decided to finally text back.

“It went super well, I’m still at his place. I’ll call you later when I get home ” He replied to Lando. When instead of a text, Lando immediately called him, Max was quick to reject it, something Lando apparently didn’t agree with. “WHY AREN’T YOU ANSWERING?! I NEED DETAILS.” He texted Max, who considered his response for a second, but finally answered with. “I can’t talk right now. Charles is asleep right next to me and I don’t want to wake him.”

Apparently, that answer wasn’t precisely to Lando’s satisfaction, who still seemed just slightly freaked out at all of this. “What the actual fuck happened last night?! How are you still there?! How is he asleep next to you?! Did you sleep with him using your powers of seduction?! I need to know things, Max! It’s important. For science.” He texted back almost immediately.

Max rolled his eyes then and decided he was going to end this conversation now and would get back to it later. “I will call you when I get home, mate. Right now I have a sleeping Charles next to me, and he’s a much prettier sight than your profile picture.” He put his phone away after pressing send, and looked back down at Charles, who still seemed as blissful and happy as when he first fell asleep.

Max spent the next half hour or so gently tracing his fingers along all of Charles’ exposed skin. Watching and mapping every square inch of his boyfriend’s body in his mind. He was just the most beautiful creature Max had ever seen, and he wasn’t planning on letting him go anytime soon now that he was finally his.

He noticed the prominence and curvature of Charles’s cheek bones, making his beautiful face seem almost sculpted from marble. How his slim hips made his torso seem just that little bit bigger and more impressive than it already was. And those hands. Those large, veiny, rough looking hands. They did things to Max on a deep level. They were the softest, most delicate hands he had ever touched of course, but damn they looked good.

Before long, Charles inevitably started to stir again, and did his now seemingly normal routine of turning further into Max and nuzzling his face into the Dutchman’s chest. “Good morning, my beautiful boyfriend.” Max whispered into the Monégasque’s ear, making him smile sleepily as he looked up into Max’s eyes.

“Good morning, Maxy.” He said quietly, rubbing at his eyes a little as he sucked in a deep breath to wake himself up a little more. “Did I have another dream or did you just actually have sex with me?” He asked as he stretched himself out like a lazy cat.

“Oh that was very real, Charlie.” Max replied with a smirk. He leaned down to press a kiss to Charles’ forehead and hummed softly as he ran his fingers over his boyfriend’s ass. “How are you feeling then? I wasn’t too rough on you, right?” He had hurt Charles enough emotionally already, he wasn’t about to start doing so physically as well.

“I’m fine. Maxy.” Charles easily replied. “A little sore, but it had been a while, so that’s to be expected. And I have a very big boyfriend too, of course.” He said with a grin. “So I think that I am very much in need of a shower now, and I was hoping that my lovely, caring, handsome boyfriend would join me and help me wash my back.” He said, batting his eyelashes a little as he glanced up into Max’s eyes.

Max laughed in response to Charles and pressed a kiss to his lips,, before he just smiled. “Have I told you yet how manipulative you are? Because you are. A lot.” He said, still smiling widely. “But I would absolutely love the burden of putting soap all over your naked body. I think people would literally kill for that job.”

Charles chuckled softly to himself and slowly sat up. He stretched a little again and finally stepped out of bed, glancing behind as he walked towards his bathroom. “Well come on then. I don’t have all day.” Max did not need to be told twice. He threw the duvet off of himself and already had his arms wrapped back around Charles’ waist before he even reached the doorway, placing little kisses in his neck.

“You look absolutely delicious, babe.” Max whispered into Charles’ ear, “I could just eat you.” Charles hummed softly in return. He was absolutely loving the sweet touch and the soft kisses, but they were doing something. “Maxy, if you keep this up we’ll never even get to the shower.” He informed his boyfriend.

He undid the embrace and took Max’s hand, dragging him along into the bathroom and finally the shower, where he turned the water on nice and hot, just how he liked it. “There will be plenty of time to enjoy all of this after we shower.” Charles said, gesturing to his own body. 

Max sighed deeply in response and shook his head, looking a little sad. “Actually, there isn’t. I have a sponsor call later today and tonight I promised Lando I’d stream with him. He already announced it everywhere. And my schedule is pretty full for the rest of the week too….”

“Oh…” Charles said quietly. He didn’t know why, but he had just assumed that they’d be spending a lot of time together from now on. He certainly had a lot of free time on his hands, but with the way their teams were set up, Max apparently had a lot more sponsor activities to take care off. “I mean…when do you have some time for me?” He asked, slightly more timidly than he’d hoped.

“Oh Charlie.” Max instantly said. Charles already sounded so sad again, and Max would do anything to stop that from happening. He took his boyfriend back into his arms and kissed him gently, before pulling back to look into his eyes. “We’ll talk on the phone every day, and you can come over to my place on Sunday. I’ll cook and you can stay the night and we can spend that time however we damn well want.”

Charles did smile in response to Max asking him to come over on Sunday and he nodded. “Okay. It’s a date then.” He said, before kissing his boyfriend again and turning around. “Now you can wash my back, please. But don’t you try anything funny back there, I’m still sore from this morning.”

With a smile, Max started to very gently wash all of Charles’ body, showing him just how much he enjoyed all of it. He ended up sitting on his knees as he washed his boyfriend’s legs and hummed softly as he thought of something. “Hey why don’t you join me and Lando tonight? You guys like each other and it’s a simple excuse for us to spend some more time together, be it online.”

Charles looked down at Max as he considered the offer, seemingly still a little unsure of it. “Are you sure, Maxy? I don’t want to be the third wheel or something and ruin your fun because you think you have to please me all the time…”

“Nooo, it’s nothing like that!” Max quickly assured him. He placed a kiss on Charles’ knee once he finished and got back up so he could properly look into his boyfriend’s eyes. “It’ll just be fun with the guys, I promise. There’s no third wheeling, it’s just the three of us having a really good time together.” Sufficiently satisfied with that answer, Charles finally nodded. “Yeah, okay. Sounds fun.”

After Max had quickly cleaned himself too, they stepped out of the shower and dried themselves off, after which Mad realised that he very much did not have a change of clothes. “Uhm, Charles could I…” he asked, looking on as Charles had already started getting dressed.

Charles looked confused for a second, before he finally figured out what Max meant. “Oh yeah of course. Pick anything you want. We’re pretty similar in size so most things should fit you anyway.” He said and hummed. “Actually, I would love to see you wear my clothes. It probably looks hot.”

Other than Charles, Max really wasn’t the most difficult when it came to clothes, so he just went with a pair of old sweatpants and what was apparently an expensive designer shirt. It just looked like a plain white one to Max, but Charles was the fashionista here, not him.

They had a quick bite of lunch together, before Max finally decided it was time for him to leave. Charles walked him over to the door, where he gave Max just the longest goodbye kiss he had ever gotten. He wasn’t complaining though. “I’m gonna miss you, Maxy.” Charles said quietly. “I enjoy having you around.

Max smiled warmly in response and kissed Charles’ nose before he answered. “It’s just a couple of days, gorgeous. Before you know it you’ll be back with me and I’ll be all yours again.” With a final short kiss, Max pulled away and left the apartment, carrying yesterday’s clothes with him in a bag.

Once Max had left, Charles first spent a little while cleaning up after the both of them and making his place looking somewhat presentable again, before he finally laid down on the couch and did what he immediately had wanted to do: Call Pierre.

Pierre was quick to answer, and seemed pleased Charles was calling him again to tell him about what happened. “‘Allo, Charles! How are you? How are things with your Maxy? Any shenanigans I need to know about?” He asked and hummed, making Charles laugh happily.

“Well, a couple?” Charles previewed, still chuckling a little. “So the short version of total events is that we’re dating now, we’re a couple, and after breakfast this morning we kinda had sex. And it was fucking incredible, Pierre. Mon dieu. Max was so good. He took such good care of me.” He told his friend, sighing happily.

It was silent on the other end for a while, before Pierre let out a hum that Charles instantly recognized as his ‘concerned’ noise. “What? Pierre, is something wrong?” Charles was quick to ask. “No, no. Not wrong per se.” Pierre replied as he sighed softly. “I’m just afraid you’re moving too fast, Charles. You know you do this thing where you always completely go hard and go deep into your next obsession, and I just want to be sure you won’t come crashing down.” He thought for a moment, unsure of how to really say this to Charles.

“Don’t you think that you’re moving a little fast? You were so angry with him after he first came by yesterday. So disappointed and heartbroken. And then when he comes back you suddenly forgive him easily and have sex with him? I’m not there of course so I only know what you told me and I’m not saying that there’s anything wrong. I just want you to think about it because I worry about you and I want you to be happy.”

Charles’ smile made way for a frown as soon as Pierre started talking and it didn’t go away. “I…I mean…We did go a little fast, yes, but it’s not that crazy, is it? There was just a misunderstanding which made Max admit his feelings which made me admit my feelings and after that we were just two very attractive people in a relationship who really wanted to have sex with each other…” He explained to Pierre.

“No, no, that’s what I’m saying, mon frère. It is nothing crazy, I just worried a little because you seemed to forgive Max so easily for what he said to you, that’s all.” Pierre assured his friend.

Charles hummed as he thought about it, but finally shrugged a little. “I…it’s fine with me. He said he misspoke about papa because he tends to be an idiot sometimes and we both know that’s very true. And since then he has been nothing but amazing, always taking care of me. He held me while I slept, he made me breakfast, he even washed my back in the shower.” Charles said, sighing happily as he thought back on it.

“Alright, Charles. If you’re happy, I’m happy.” Pierre finally replied. “But if he ever does hurt you, you come to me. I’ll go and kick his ass.” He added, making Charles giggle a little. “Sure Pierre. Thank you. Love you.” He replied. “I love you too, mon frère.” They talked for a little while longer, changing the subject to some more everyday things, before Pierre had to take his leave and they ended the call. He spent the rest of the day like he usually did. Working out, making dinner, and finally getting ready for the stream that night with Max and Pierre, waiting until it was finally time.

As promised, as soon as Max finally got home, he called Lando, putting it on speaker as he got himself a drink. “FUCKING FINALLY DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW LONG I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR YOU?!” Lando immediately yelled as he picked up the phone. “Tell me fucking everything. Everything Max.”

Max chuckled softly at Lando’s…whole deal, and hummed a little to himself. “So I’m gonna go out on a limb here and assume that telling you fucking everything does not include telling you everything about the fucking?” He asked with a smirk. “Eeewwww, n-wait. You two had sex? Like actual, full on sex? After you went there to apologize? Daaaaaaaamn my boy’s got game.” 

Max fondly shook his head at Lando, but did decide to cut off that line of thinking. “Nah. I’m just an idiot who went over there to apologize and finally come out for his feelings. If anything, it’s that Monégasque seducer who also calls himself my boyfriend who’s got game. He’s such a manipulative little shit and I love it.”

“So what’s the timeline here then?” Lando asked. “You apologized, you came out for your feelings, he had them too, he seduced you, you fucked til morning, you slept over? Cause that’s what I’m getting here.” Lando explained.

“No, it’s not like that. It’s cuter.” Max said happily. “So after we admitted our feelings, we went to watch Jurassic Park and he fell asleep in my arms. Then when he woke up, we realized it was past curfew and I would have to sleep over. He then manipulated me into sleeping in bed with him, but nothing happened. Cause apparently, mornings are when Charles gets a little horny.” Max said and chuckled softly.

“So I made us breakfast first, and then we had sex, and then the pretty sleepyhead decided to take a nap, which is when you and I texted. Then later we took a shower together and I left and now I’m here.” Max said, explaining the whole timeline to Lando, who stayed silent for a second.

“So we texted post fuck and you didn’t even tell your bro? Bro. I’m so disappointed in you right now, bro.” Lando finally said, making Max nearly choke on his juice as he laughed. “Fuck you I was drinking!” He told Lando, who went off into a giggle fit. 

When Max had finally cleaned himself up again, he decided to shift the conversation. “Hey so Charles wants to play COD with us tonight on stream. That’s fine, right?” He asked Lando, who was quick to agree. “Yeah, that sounds real fun! I bet he’s gonna be really shit at it and easy to kill, so he’ll make me look better!” He said excitedly.

Max rolled his eyes on Lando and shook his head. “Haha, very funny. I’m sure Charlie will surprise you though!” He replied, making Lando laugh some more. “Ooohhhh look at you, mate. Defending your boyfriend so gallantly. Max and Charlie, sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G.”

“You are so fucking ridiculous.” Max said as he laughed happily. “Hey man. Duty calls, so I’ll see you tonight yeah?” He told Lando. “Okay, mate. See you then!” Lando replied, after which they ended the call.

Max was still chuckling a little to himself after the call had ended. Lando was just so fucking ridiculous. He was really pleased he had agreed to Charles joining them though, their night was promising to be a lot of fun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time: more streaming! Who will be the third wheel? Will Charles be somewhat competent at COD?


	10. Cars & Balls

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a couple days, cause I've been super busy, but here we are again! Hope you enjoy!  
> This chapter: Streaming with Charles, Max and Lando. Just some good fun and a little friction here and there....

Charles had been counting down the hours, minutes & seconds until the start of his stream with Max and Lando at 8.30. Even though Charles had still been on cloud nine after his boyfriend had left, later on he found himself simply alone again in his big, empty apartment. Going through the same routine that he had done for the past couple of weeks. At least at he did have something to look forward now. First the stream tonight and on Sunday, date night!

Charles was really wondering what Max's apartment looked like. Max really gave off the vibe that all he ever did there was workout on the balcony, which…yum, and play videogames in the dark, so it was pretty hard to picture anything else.

So Charles was really relieved when it was 8.15 and almost time to finally get started. He had put on a great looking outfit, if he did say so himself. Max seemed to really enjoy the bandana and glasses look, so he obviously went with those, as well a cute white sweater, because it was April and the evening and it was still kind of cold sometimes. He picked a matching black/white bandana and finally sat down at his PC, where he was really pleased to see Max was already in the call.

“Maxy!” He called excitedly when he entered, making his boyfriend chuckle. “Hi there, Charlie. Did you survive the rest of the day without your lover around then?” He asked with a smirk, while Charles let out a very pained sigh. “Ugh, barely. It is just so boring in this apartment without you to torment.” Charles admitted as he pouted a little. He then realized Max couldn’t see that, and so he turned his camera on too, pouting a little extra for emphasis.

Max’s eyes suddenly lit up as he looked at the screen and he made a very approving sound as he took in the sight of his boyfriend. “Damn, Charlie. You really can’t just come in looking like that without warning me first!” He told his boyfriend, who laughed happily. “Really, Charles. You look incredible. I wish I was with you right now so that I could hold you and kiss you and mayb-PING” Max was interrupted by a third person joining their call: Lando.

“STOP WITH THE DIRTY TALK I AM HERE TOO NOW.” He called. Lando had his camera turned on too and he was shielding his eyes. “Is it safe to look yet? Is nobody naked?” He asked, making Max just look annoyed while Charles burst out laughing. “So I guess it’s safe to assume you told Lando about us?” He asked Max with a smile, who just looked a little sheepish in return. “Yeah….” He admitted. “Are you angry with me?”

“No, of course not.” Charles said and continued to smile at Max. “It’s fine. I told Pierre too…I just think we should wait with making it public or something, but there’s nothing wrong telling the people close to you.” He informed Max, who nodded. “Yeah, public seems like a bad idea…” He told Charles, before he clapped. “So, streaming and videogames. Rocket League tonight.”

“Yessssss!” Lando said excitedly. “So we’re gonna play some Rocket League tonight online and if it turns out we are really fucking terrible which of course it won’t cause we’re awesome, we’ll switch and probably just play some 1v1 in turns or something to see who is the best out of all of us which is obviously me.’’

‘’Yeah…I have never actually played the game before.’’ Charles admitted. ‘’I just installed it earlier today and did the tutorial and stuff, so I know the buttons, but just so you know, Lando.’’ Max chucked softly at Charles’ worries. ‘’Don’t worry, Charlie. Lando isn’t gonna be much better than you are anyway. He just doesn’t have the same knack for driving cars that we do.’’ He said with a grin, teasing Lando a little. ‘’And I haven’t played the game before either. Lando just insisted on playing it tonight because it is, and I quote ‘real good fun’.’’

Max wasn’t streaming tonight. He already had Charles’ page open though, and he figured he would probably be watching more of his gorgeous boyfriend than actually playing the game. And he didn’t feel bad about that in the slightest, given the way Charles was looking tonight.

‘’Who do you think will get more viewers tonight then, guys?’’ Max asked teasingly. They all knew that it would 100% percent be Charles, given his status as Ferrari golden boy and all around very pretty person. Nonetheless, it annoyed Lando very much, given his dedication to the whole streaming thing, whereas Charles was just doing this on the side.

Lando just grumbled a little, exactly knowing what Max was doing there, but it did draw a reaction from Charles. ‘’Oh, Lando! I hit three and a half thousand subs! Isn’t that amazing?!’’ He asked excitedly. ‘’I’m so happy that Pierre suggested to me I should start streaming. It’s just the most fun to do.’’

“Yes, Charlie. That’s really amazing.” Lando did manage to reply, before he changed the subject. “So I’m gonna start my stream. You guys go ahead and start your games and we’ll make a party and get going!” He told the pair of them, before muting.

“Yeah, me too.” Charles said happily. “Are you not streaming, Max?” He asked his boyfriend, who shook his head. “Nah. I’d much rather have you on my other screen to look at than chat, babe.” Max replied with a grin, making Charles blush slightly. “Yeah…okay. I’m gonna get started too now.” He quickly said, muting Max and heading into his own stream to start it.

Charles pressed start on his own stream and waited for second, making sure everything was actually working before he started to speak. “Hi guys! Welcome back!” He said excitedly. “So tonight I’m gonna be streaming Rocket League together with Max and Lando, and we’re gonna play 3v3 matches online and maybe some one on one if we think that’s more fun. The goal is to win at least a single game tonight, so we’ll see if that actually happens!” 

Charles went off into a much longer introduction then, talking to chat and answering some questions and Max just couldn’t help but smile. His boyfriend was looking so beautiful and was so good at this. He finally glanced to the side of Charles at his chat too, and his smile immediately faded. The amount of hate aimed at Max was overwhelming, to say the least. It was bad, and some of the things said made Max feel so nauseous that he quickly closed the chat window.

Apparently though, Charles had noticed too, judging by the frown that was growing larger and deeper on his face. “Hey, chat!” He finally called out. “Stop with the hate towards Max! Yes we had an argument and stuff, but we talked it out and we’re really close...” He stumbled a little over the end of that sentence, almost saying something a little more newsworthy. “So anyone insulting him can get lost and banned, mods.”

Charles seemed a little overly combative and protective to Max. They were all just anonymous trolls after all, but the sentiment was greatly appreciated, and he couldn’t resist sending Charles a little kiss emoji for defending him so well. Charles, always so super prepared for these things, of course still had his WhatsApp application opened on his computer, and so he saw the message when the notification popped, making him smile like an idiot and give a knowing glance at the camera.

Lando and Charles got the rest of their stream introductions out of the way, and finally got back into the Discord call with Max. ‘’Alright, who’s ready to kick some ASS?!’’ Lando called as he launched their party into an online game. It wasn’t long before they were behind a full 5-0 with both Max and Charles getting progressively more annoyed as the match went on, extremely competitive as they both were.

‘’Nooooo, this game is so unfair, Lando!’’ Charles whined. ‘’It makes no sense! The ball is constantly flying everywhere and the cars are uncontrollable and jump and its chaos.’’ Then however, Charles managed to somehow jump up at the right time and hit the ball, sending it flying all the way across the field and into the opposite goal.

‘’OOOOHHHHHHHHHH!’’ Charles exclaimed, almost falling out of his chair as he jumped up excitedly on it. ‘’I did it, I did it! Max, Lando, did you see?! I scored!’’ Max was just laughing happily at Charles’ explosion of happiness, while Lando reacted a little calmer. ‘’Well done, Charlie! Good goal. Only 4 more to go in 1 minute to make overtime!’’

This obviously didn’t work out, and in the end they lost the game 6-1 overall. Over the next 2 hours or so, the three of them kept playing game after game, and got demonstrably better as time went on. They even went into overtime twice, but sadly lost both games.

Once they got into their 12th or so game of the night, things suddenly started to click into place. Lando was absolutely killing it on defence, and when Charles managed to even nudge in a goal after a particularly great clearance from the Brit, they both nearly lost it.

‘’OOHHHHHH, GET IN THERE CHARLIE. WE ROCK!’’ Lando exclaimed, while Charles was yelling just as loudly. ‘’YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAS. LANDO! LANDO WE’RE AMAZING! WE COULD GO FUCKING PRO LANDO!’’ Once the pair of them were done celebrating, Max cleared his throat a little. ‘’Yeah guys, great goal. What a team.’’ He was feeling a little salty. Lando and Charles were improving a lot more than he was, and it was starting to annoy him a little that he couldn’t keep up with their level of play.

This, much to Max’s chagrin, continued for the rest of the stream. Lando and Charles were improving by the game and while Max was getting better, he was progressing a lot slower and started to feel like he was holding the others back. And he absolutely hated that. ‘’Yeah guys, I’m starting to think that this isn’t really my game…’’ He finally said.

Charles didn’t understand what Max was saying at all. They were currently on a 4-game winning streak and things were going amazingly well. Of course this was their game! Lando however, was less kind to his friend. ‘’Ha ha! Maxy’s getting salty cause he can’t score a goal!’’ He teased, getting Max back for what he had been doing earlier. ‘’Don’t worry, Max. You just need another 500 or so hours of practice and then maybe you’ll be on the same level as Charles and me.’’

Max rolled his eyes on Lando then and remained salty and annoyed for the entire rest of the stream. It really wasn’t fair, right? Lando being better was fine, he had already played loads of this game. But Charles? Charles hadn’t ever played this game either, why was he better than him? It’s bullshit. Max was convinced he was good at video games, so Charles shouldn’t be beating him.

‘’Are you sure this is your first time playing, Charles?’’ Max finally asked. ‘’You seem surprisingly good at this.’’ Charles smiled brightly at the question, convinced his boyfriend was giving him a very sweet compliment instead of being salty. ‘’Yes!’’ He said happily. ‘’But I apparently have a real talent for it, right Lando?!’’

Lando, knowing Max through and through, did easily pick up and the salt and just nodded happily at Charles. ‘’Yeah you do, Charles! Really we should just probably move on as a duo and leave all that dead weight in our dust.’’ He teased with a grin, trying to get under Max’s skin.

‘’Oh fuck you, Lando.’’ Max replied as he rolled his eyes. ‘’We all know that I’m the best sim driver out of all of us, you just happen to be slightly better at driving little cars towards a ball.’’ Lando just started laughing loudly at how serious Max was taking all this and shook his head. ‘’Just calm down, Maxy. We’ve just been having a go at you. It’s been a really fun night.’’

Max just sighed softly in return. ‘’Yeah guys, alright. I’m think I’m gonna call it a night though. It’s been fun, talk to you soon.’’ He said, before he left the game and the call. Charles and Lando continued playing, there were having way too much fun to stop already. They did decide to stop playing online and instead play each other, to see who was better at Rocket League.

After another 4 games though, there were tied and they decided to play one final game to determine the overall winner. As they played, both of them were busier trying not to lose than they were trying to win, which resulted in a 0-0 score at the end and an overtime situation, in which whoever scored first would be crowned the winner. 

‘’Alright Charlie boy. This is it! This is for everything and eternal fame!’’ Lando said excitedly. Charles narrowed his eyes a little, looking very serious and wanting to win this badly. ‘’You’re going down Lando.’’ He told the Brit, before they finally started.

Charles went hard on the attack now, forcing Lando on the defensive. Annoyingly though, the Brit was just too good a defender, and after Charles went all in on a final move towards the goal, Lando’s deflection meant that the ball was sent towards the other side, rolling over the finish agonizingly slowly as Charles tried and failed to race towards and save it. 

‘’BOOM!’’ Lando called excitedly as he jumped out of his seat and let his controller fall on the floor. ‘’I AM THE ROCKET LEAGUE MASTER OF THE WORLD FOREVER AND ALWAYS.’’ He yelled, taking a few steps around the room before he finally sat back down with a grin. ‘’Good game, Charlie. Good game.’’ Charles was just chuckling a little at Lando and smiled even in defeat. ‘’It was! That was really fun, despite it being the wrong result.’’

They played a couple more games just for fun, before they finally too decided to end it for the day. They said goodbye to each other and went back to their own streams, ending those too after hanging out for a little while longer, just relaxing and talking to their chats.

The rest of the week went by agonizingly slow for Charles. He managed to speed things up a little by streaming a couple more times, playing some race sims, some truck simulator and some other dumb little games that his chat was suggesting to him left and right.

He was texting a lot with Max as the week went on, and they got their calls in when they got when they both had some free time, but it just wasn’t the same thing as being physically close to each other. Not even close. 

So he was extremely excited when it was finally Sunday evening, and time to head over to Max’s place for their date. Their date was casual, so Charles had just put on a simple shirt and jeans, although he had made sure to pick clothes that would accentuate just how fit he had gotten in the lockdown, given that he had nothing better to do.

He finally left his apartment and drove over to Max’s place, taking a deep breath before he finally knocked on the door. Max opened the door quickly after, and immediately pulled Charles inside. He closed the door behind his boyfriend, before he turned back around and kissed him deeply. 

‘’Hey, you.’’ Max said quietly. ‘’I missed you, you excited for tonight?’’ He asked quietly. Charles was still a little breathless from Max’s greeting and blinked a few times before he could answer him. ‘’I…yeah.’’ He finally said, earning him a chuckle from Max.

‘’Good. Cause I have a really nice evening planned for the both of us.’’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time: Date night! I'm so excited! :D


	11. Date Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really like this chapter, which makes sense, given that it's the longest so far. It's fluff and it's smut and it's everything I love about these dorks <3

‘’Good. Cause I have a really nice evening planned for the both us.’’ Max said excitedly. He took Charles’ hands in his own and placed a kiss on one of them, before he sighed happily. ‘’You’re looking absolutely amazing, babe.’’ He said, making Charles chuckle a little again. ‘’I just put on a shirt and pants and did my hair, Max. We’re just gonna have a nice, relaxed time, right?’’

Max nodded softly and placed another kiss on Charles’ lips before he pulled away. ‘’Yes we are. We’re gonna have some dinner and then we’re gonna watch another movie together. Buuuuut would you like a tour of the place first?’’ He asked, raising a curious eyebrow at Charles.

‘’Yes!’’ The Monegasque said immediately. ‘’Show me how my boyfriend lives. I can’t believe I have no idea what your apartment is like!’’ He said, turning his head around so he could start looking. Max chuckled softly at Charles and smiled at him. ‘’Well it’s nothing special. I still just rent this place as somewhere to come home to between races….or a little longer now, apparently.’’

He let go of one of Charles’ hands and walked inside with him, entering his open plan living room/kitchen. ‘’Oooohhhhh.’’ Charles commented as he looked around. ‘’Yeah this is obviously a rental apartment.’’ He teased, chuckling softly.

‘’Hey, no hating on my place!’’ Max replied, but couldn’t supress a smile. Charles was right. Compared to his apartment, Max’ place was indeed pretty shitty. But it had been home for a while now, and Max still liked it a lot. 

‘’So anyway, this is the living room/kitchen. Over there are the doors to the balcony, there’s a really pretty view of the harbour and it’s an amazing workout spot. And then through here is my bedroom.’’ Max told Charles, who had let go of his boyfriend’s hand so he could walk around and inspect things a little more closely.

‘’It’s pretty nice.’’ He finally said, before he walked out onto the balcony. ‘’Oh wow you weren’t lying. This place is huge and the view really is incredible.’’ He commented, leaning over the balustrade to take it in a little better.

Max looked at Charles with an adoring smile and walked over, hugging him from behind and placing a little kiss in his neck. ‘’I know I shouldn’t be doing this in public, but you’re looking way too cute not to kiss.’’ He said quietly. 

‘’Such a charmer.’’ Charles said in return, leaning backwards a little against Max as he was held in the man’s arms. ‘’That reminds me, how about you show me your bedroom?’’ He suggested with a hum. ‘’I’d love to see where I’ll be sleeping tonight.’’

Max chuckled softly at Charles’ suggestion and placed another sweet kiss in his neck, before he let go and walked him back inside. ‘’Alright, the bedroom then.’’ He said and winked at Charles as he opened a door. ‘’Have a little lie down if you want. The bed is super comfortable.’’

Charles didn’t need to be told twice and jumped onto Max’ bed as he ran into the room. He laid down on his back and sighed happily, feeling the sheets a little as he looked around. ‘’Very nice.’’ He commented with a bright smile. ‘’Feels expensive at least.’’ He added happily. 

‘’Only the best for my boyfriend of course.’’ Max replied with a wink, before he too got onto the bed and laid down next to Charles. ‘’Fancy seeing you here on my bed.’’ He said with a grin, before he leaned in and kissed his boyfriend.  
Charles easily leaned into the kiss and moved against Max as they made out a little. Max tried to keep it lazy and relaxed for the time being, but he could feel the Monegasque’s hand moving underneath his shirt. It made Max pull away and hum a little. ‘’Charlie, how about we have dinner first and maybe watch the movie and then later on before bed we can have some fun if you like?’’ He proposed, placing a quick peck on his boyfriend’s lips.

Charles let out a long, pained sigh and let his head hang a little, before he finally nodded. ‘’Fiiiiiine. It’s not like I had to miss you all week long and I finally wanted to enjoy my absolutely insanely gorgeous boyfriend.’’ He said as he pulled away and got back up, offering Max a hand. 

‘’Since when are you such a drama queen?’’ The Dutchman asked with a teasing little smile, as he let Charles pull him up from the bed. ‘’Since you became my boyfriend actually.’’ Charles easily replied as he helped Max up and kissed him a final time. “For some reason I got a lot more needy of someone’s attention now that I know he likes me back.” Charles replied, before Max pulled him along with him to the kitchen.

“So here’s the thing…” Max started. “Dinner was a bit of a challenge. Cause I can’t cook to save my own life, and I know your diet is waaaaaay too strict to be any fun. So I was thinking that maybe we could just make some burgers. I got like all the veggies you got possibly want on a burger for you, and if you’d like I even got the vegetarian of the meat.” Max said, making Charles smile. He let his boyfriend finish, before he kissed him again.

“That’s alright, Maxy.” Charles said happily. “I can allow myself one cheat day every once in a while. Which will probably be whenever you make us dinner.” He said and laughed a little. “You should really take some cooking lessons, you know.” He shook his head a little on his boyfriend and went to the fridge to get everything out.

“I’ll chop the onions and the lettuce and the tomato and you can put the burgers on and try to see to it that they don’t burn.” He told Max with a wink. “Think you’re up to the challenge?” Max rolled his eyes a little on Charles, grabbed a pan and started grilling the burgers. “I’m not THAT hopeless in the kitchen. I can grill a burger, Charlie.” He informed his boyfriend, as he watched him chop the vegetables.

“You know you look hot doing that.” Max commented as he leaned against the counter and looked on. “But that’s kind of a moot point cause you pretty much look hot doing anything.” Charles started laughing at that and shot Max an annoyed look. “Stop making me laugh when I’m handling sharp knives, you dick.”

Max started laughing in return then and hugged Charles from behind again, kissing his neck as the Monegasque worked on their dinner. “You rather I distract you by telling you the things I want to do to you later tonight?” He asked quietly, grinning when he could feel the shiver running through Charles’ body.

“I’ll take that as a yes.” Max said, before pulling away. “Sadly though, I’m on grilling duty, so you’ll have to wait for tonight to figure out what it is.” He said and winked when Charles looked at him very unamused.

“I’m not sure I like you anymore.” Charles told his lover as he finally finished his task. He rinsed the knife and put it aside, crossing his arms and leaning against the counter as he watched Max. “You look somewhat like you know what you’re doing though. That’s a start.”

Max just fondly rolled his eyes on Charles then and decided to not let the teasing escalate any further from there. He grilled the burgers until he and mostly Charles were happy with them, before they dressed their plates and sat down together. “Bon appetit.” Charles said, kissing Max’ cheek. “And thanks for inviting me over for dinner, it’s nice being together like this.”

Max, having already dug into his burger when Charles started talking, nodded and quickly swallowed his bite. “Yeah, really nice. Now, just eat your food so we can go and cuddle on the couch.” He said and chuckled a little. “No rush.”

They ate the rest of their dinner in mostly comfortable silence. Max cleaned up after them, while Charles searched for a blanket and booted up Netflix to find something nice to watch together. “You really need to invest in softer blankets, Maxy.” Charles commented when he finally found the rag Max had called a blanket. “This is a joke.”

“Hey don’t you disrespect my stuff!” Max called from the kitchen. He finally headed out a minute later and sat down on the couch, opening his arms wide. “Come on then, Charlie. Did you find a movie you like?” He asked, wrapping his arms snugly around Charles as the man sat down and cuddled in against his side.

“Yeah I wanna watch the last Spiderman movie. I still haven’t seen it.” Charles said happily, making Max smile. “Oh yeah, it’s great. I don’t mind watching that again with you.” He told his boyfriend, giving him a kiss as Charles started the movie.

They got a little ways through it before Charles finally found the nerve to ask something he’d been thinking about for a while now. “Hey Maxy? Can I ask you something personal?” He asked his boyfriend, waiting for Max to meet his gaze. Max hummed softly and looked away from the screen. “Of course, love. Whatever you want.” He replied easily.

“The rumours that went around about you and Daniel. Were they true?” Charles asked, making Max burst out laughing. “Really, Charlie? That’s your deep and personal question? Did Dan and I hook up?” He kept chuckling for a little while longer, before he finally just shrugged. “Yeah it’s true. Dan and I used to hook up from time to time if we both felt like it. But it was just super casual, nothing like how I feel about you.”

Max looked down at Charles and kissed him gently. “Know that I only have eyes for you, gorgeous.” He said quietly, making Charles chuckle. “I know, have you seen me?” He asked with a smirk, before he kissed Max back. “I was just curious, because the thought was kinda hot.” He said quietly, subconsciously licking his lips a little. 

Max hummed and pulled Charles a little closer. “Really, Charlie? The thought of your boyfriend having sex with another man is turning you on?” He asked, raising an eyebrow as he had a playful little smirk on his face.

“I mean, not now obviously. If you did that now I’d end you.” Charles replied with a smile. “But the thought of you doing that in the past is kind of hot. Just the thought of you, naked and sexy is hot to begin with.” Max kissed him again then, and pulled Charles in nice and close against his own body.

“How have you managed to make me want to take you into the bedroom before we’ve even gotten through the first act of the movie?” He whispered against his boyfriend’s lips. He could feel Charles smile in return, the bastard. “It’s a talent of mine.” He replied and hummed softly. “So how about you take me into your bedroom then, handsome? I would love to try out that bed of yours.”

Max really didn’t need to be told twice. He moved Charles around in his arms and got up from the couch, carrying his boyfriend bridal style to the bedroom. Thank god he’d been working out, or he never would’ve been able to carry him. He placed his lover down on the bed and got on top of him, kissing him deeply. “Have I ever told you before that you’re a manipulative little shit?” He asked Charles, who just fucking giggled in return. “I’m aware of that.” He said with a sly smile.

Max sat back up then, looking down at Charles and grinning. “Do you have any idea how amazing it feels to have Charles fucking Leclerc in my bed right now, looking like an absolute fucking present for me to unwrap?” He asked, humming softly as he ran his fingers over the visible veins on Charles’ hand.

Charles hummed softly, looking down and smirking as he gently grabbed hold of Max’ bulge. “I think I’m starting to understand now how you feel about it.” Max smirked too. He wasn’t embarrassed in the slightest. Charles was looking hot as fuck and it clearly was his goal to get him hard, so mission accomplished.

“I would love to watch you suck on it, love.” He whispered into his boyfriend’s ear, giving it a little kiss as Charles let out a moan. “Fuck, I’d love to.” He told Max, pulling at the man’s shirt so he could take it off of him. He wanted to get his boyfriend naked as quickly as possible, and he had to start somewhere.

Max was quick to oblige and sat up again, taking his shirt off and throwing it aside, before he grinned down at Charles. ‘’Your turn, babe.’’ He told his lover, pulling his shirt up and over his head, before throwing it in a similar direction. Charles made a little noise as Max did. ‘’That’s an expensive shirt…’’ He said, before Max shut him up with another kiss.

‘’That’s really not what you should be thinking about right now, babe.’’ Max mumbled against the Monegasque’s lips. He undid Charles’ pants as they made out, and only pulled away so he could pull them down along with his socks and send them flying into the same general direction as their shirts.

He then quickly undid his own pants and in an attempt to take them off as quickly as possible, managed to roll off onto the bed and straight onto the ground, making Charles burst out laughing. ‘’Oh my god! Maxy, are you okay?’’ He asked in between tears of laughter.

Max got up from the ground and finally took his pants off completely, looking a little sheepish. ‘’Uh, yeah I think so.’’ He told Charles. ‘’I didn’t ruin the mood, did I?’’ He asked, prompting Charles to grab Max’ hand and pull him back in. ‘’Not in the slightest.’’ He told his boyfriend, before kissing him deeply again.

They made out for a couple of minutes, getting themselves back into the mood, before Charles was finally the one to roll them over, leaving himself on top of Max. ‘’I think I promised to suck on something for my boyfriend.’’ He said and grinned at the Dutchman. ‘’You’d like that, wouldn’t you?’’ He asked as he started placing kisses in his boyfriend’s neck on the way down.

‘’Fuck. Nothing would make me happier, babe.’’ Max said, letting out a little moan at the feeling of his lover’s lips on his neck and his hands all over his body. He watched breathlessly as Charles slowly moved down, his fingers almost on instinct going into the man’s hair to be able to touch him.

Charles finally moved all the way down between Max’s legs and placed a kiss on his boyfriend’s inner thigh, before he pulled down the Dutchman’s boxers and with a smirk, threw them into the same direction as Max had thrown the rest of their clothes. He finally laid down between his lover’s legs and finally took a hold of his cock, stroking it very slowly.

A shiver went through Max’s body as soon as Charles touched him and he let out a sigh that turned into a soft moan halfway through. ‘’Fuck, Charlie. You fucking do things to me.’’ He mumbled, putting his biceps over his eyes for a second as he tried to cope.

Charles chuckled softly to himself and smirked. ‘’I haven’t yet, Maxy. I’m about to though.’’ He said, before he leaned in and licked a thick stripe from the base of Max’s cock to the tip, before he closed his lips around the head.  
He used his tongue to tease Max a little, before he moved further down, taking more and more of the Dutchman’s cock in his mouth. He started off slowly, just getting Max hot and bothered and desperate for more, before he finally started to properly bop his head and suck him off.

As Charles worked his absolute fucking magic, Max just had to close his eyes. He was about 90% sure that if he were to watch his boyfriend as well as feel what he was doing to him, he would instantly come and pretty much ruin the night.

‘’Fuck, Charlie.’’ He moaned, his fingers threading through Charles’ hair as the Monegasque blew him. ‘’That feels so fucking good.’’ Charles was seeing what he was doing to Max. On the one hand, he wanted to make his boyfriend absolutely fall apart. On the other, he also really wanted Max to fuck him, and if he made him come right now, there was a chance of that not happening.

So after just a few minutes of sucking Max off, Charles pulled off with a loud pop and hummed softly. ‘’How would you like it if I rode you, Maxy?’’ He asked, gently running his hands over his lover’s thigh as he asked the question.   
Max nearly stopped breathing at Charles’ proposal and finally just nodded. ‘’Y-yeah, that’s…I…Yes please.’’ He stammered, unable to really have any structure to his sentences anymore after Charles’ blowjob and the prospect of what was still to come.

Charles smirked down at Max at the reaction he drew from his lover and leaned down, giving him a slow, long kiss before pulling away. ‘’Tell me where you keep your condoms and lube, Maxy.’’ He whispered, pulling away and raising an inquisitive eyebrow at Max. 

‘’I…yeah…fuck.’’ Max mumbled, scrambling over to his nightstand. He opened the middle drawer and grabbed both items, tossing them back over to Charles as he got back into his previous spot. Charles chuckled softly and ripped open the condom, putting in on Max with a soft hum. He grabbed the lube too, and started to lube up his boyfriend’s cock, while Max looked on.

‘’Are you…don’t you need to prep yourself?’’ He asked Charles, biting his lip a little as his lover’s hands still felt amazing on his cock. Charles looked up into Max’s eyes, and smirked when he saw his pupils had blown so wide with lust that the blue was nearly gone. ‘’I already prepped myself at home, Maxy. That’s why I was so excited to get going.’’ 

He leaned over again as he got into position, giving Max a final kiss, before he positioned himself over Max’s cock and slowly sank down with a low moan. ‘’Fuck, you’re thick.’’ He mumbled, biting down on his lip as he got all of Max inside of him.

Max felt like the breath was knocked from his lungs as Charles sank down onto his cock. He felt so fucking amazing, and it somehow felt even better than when he fucked him before. ‘’Fuck…Charlie.’’ He moaned, his hands moving to his boyfriend’s hips as he just wanted to touch some part of him. ‘’You’re so fucking beautiful.’’

‘’Fuck, you should see my view.’’ Charles replied, leaning down to kiss Max hard as he started to slowly move his hips, getting used to the feeling of having the man inside of him again. When the ache finally started to dissipate and it just felt really fucking good, Charles finally started to properly ride his boyfriend, moving his hips in a steady rhythm with his hands leaning on Max’s chest.

Max almost couldn’t decide what was better. The absolutely incredible feeling of fucking Charles, or the sight of the man all sweaty, wild looking and so fucking sexy currently hanging over him. It really didn’t take him long, before he started to feel like he would be coming pretty soon if Charles kept this up.

Not wanting to make his boyfriend wait, he moved his hand to Charles’ cock, stroking him in tandem with the man’s bounces. The double stimulation made Charles gasp loudly, and he looked down into Max’s eyes as he moaned. ‘’Fuck, Maxy. I’m gonna come. Feels so fucking good, you’re gonna make me come.’’ He told his lover, who managed to flash Charles a grin in return. 

‘’Come on, babe. You can do it. Come for me.’’ Max said. With a final, loud moan, Charles did, coming hard all over Max’s chest and even managing to get some on his lover’s chin. The incredible sight in front of him, and the way Charles was still bouncing on his cock sent Max over the edge too. He gripped Charles’ hips again, holding on tight as he came hard into the condom with a long moan.

‘’Fuuuuuck, Charlie.’’ He said, his head falling back down onto the bed. He saw that Charles was about to collapse into his arms, but he was currently pretty disgusting, so he kept his boyfriend upright for a moment, laying him down next to him. ‘’I’ll clean us up, love. No worries.’’

He gave Charles a quick kiss and got up, running to the bathroom. He quickly cleaned himself a little and returned with a wet cloth, cleaning up his boyfriend as well before tossing the cloth away and crawling back into bed, collecting Charles in his arms. ‘’You….you are fucking incredible, Charlie.’’ He said quietly.

Charles hummed softly in return and grinned as he curled up against Max. ‘’You’re not so bad yourself, Verstappen.’’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time will probably be a transitional/time skippy chapter, as we're starting to move towards the actual racing season!


	12. The Season Commences

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, now that all the pieces are where I wanted them to be and we've had some real nice fluff, we're skipping to the start of the season! So today are a summary of what has happened in the rest of the lockdown and the first race, the 2020 Austrian GP!

Compared how slow the first few weeks of the lockdown crept by, the last 2.5 months to the start of the season seemed to absolutely fly by for Charles. Now that he was in a relationship with Max, he finally had things to look forward to again, to get excited about. It seemed like the difference between night and day for the Monegasque.

After the first couple of weeks, their relationship fell into a nice rhythm that the both of them seemed very pleased with. They committed to at least spending the evening and night together once every week, thereby forcing themselves to not be surprised by their schedules and missing out on some time together. In reality, they were more likely to spend 2-3 nights a week together, excited as they always were to see each other.

A couple of weeks in, they decided to share the news with their families, not wanting to keep any secrets from them. Charles invited his brothers and mom over for dinner and properly introduced Max to them as his boyfriend. They took it incredibly well, seeing as they had seen Charles at his lowest and had already begun to try and figure out what he had happened that made it look like he was doing so much better over the last couple weeks. The reason was obviously Max and if he made their Charles happy, then anything was fine with them.

Things were…slightly different, with Max’s family. They had to do this over Zoom to start with, which wasn’t really an ideal way to introduce your new partner. His mother and sister took the news well, as was expected. They were just really happy that Max had found someone to share the lockdown time with and they just wanted him to be happy. And who couldn’t love Charles? The pretty, polite boy was practically perfect son-in-law material.

His father was a bit more sceptical, to put it lightly. In his opinion, Max’s racing career should come first, always. And getting in a relationship with your biggest rival wasn’t really a great move in that respect. It dulled your senses. After Jos had pretty much told him so directly to his face, Max politely told him to fuck off and to call him back whenever he could talk to him like an adult and respect his choices.

It was about a month and a half into the relationship when it finally happened. Max was still in bed when Charles had an early morning call with some guys back at the factory that they somehow managed to end early. He decided to make his boyfriend a fancy breakfast in bed and grinned when he saw that Max was starting to wake up as he walked in.

‘’Good morning, sleeping beauty.’’ He said happily. ‘’I made you some breakfast in bed cause I am just that incredible a boyfriend.’’ He added with a grin. Max stretched himself out as he saw Charles and gave the man a sleepy smile. ‘’You’re so amazing.’’ He said and sighed happily. ‘’That’s why I love you.’’

Charles’ breathing stopped for a moment and he nearly dropped the tray at those words. ‘’I…do you really?’’ He asked, not really sure given the manner in which Max was telling him this. Max seemed to have shocked himself there for a second, but he never really was one to not take a risk. ‘’Yeah…Yeah, I do. I love you Charlie.’’ He told his boyfriend. It was a little awkward, because he was still naked in bed from the night before, but now seemed as good a time to say it as any.

Charles nearly dropped the tray again, but managed to put it down on the nightstand before he pretty much dove onto Max, kissing him deeply and holding him tight. Max kissed his boyfriend back and sighed happily, before he looked Charles in the eye. ‘’You love me too, right…?’’ He asked, making Charles laugh and smack his chest. ‘’Yes you idiot. Of course I love you too!’’

Their relationship only really accelerated from there on out. They started to spend even more time together, and Max found himself spending almost more time at Charles’ apartment than his own. When Max finally managed to almost expose them by walking behind Charles half naked as he was in a call with the factory, they decided that the time had probably come for them to actually inform their teams about their relationship.

Red Bull took the whole thing quite well. They made Max have a talk with someone from the legal department who walked him through and reminded him of all the confidentiality agreements he had signed, but other than that they were pretty alright with it. As long as he didn’t do any dangerous things, they never really got into his personal life. Max’s team had made sure of that too during contract negotiations.

How different it was at Ferrari. As soon as the word was out, they deemed Charles’ relationship completely unacceptable. They told Charles that if this were to ever come out, he would be absolutely killed in the conservative Italian press and it might mean the end of his career. Charles however, could not care less. He was finally feeling happy again with Max, and a few negative articles weren’t going to change that. Besides, he was Ferrari’s golden boy, had won the Monza GP last season and the Tifosi adored him. How bad could it possibly be?

So he told his team to stop whining about it and deal with it, because Max was in his life now and he was there to stay. They didn’t have control of his love life and Charles wasn’t about to let some corporate strategy and bullshit tabloid papers dictate who he was and wasn’t supposed to love. He was way too stubborn for that.

The final stretch to the first race was a little tough. They both knew that they wouldn’t be able to really see each other all week, and they absolutely hated it. They spent the night before they’d leave at Charles’ place, with the Monegasque all curled up in his boyfriend’s arms as they got ready to sleep.

“It’s just not fair.” Charles whined for what was about the 618th time. “None of us are infected and we get tested all the freaking time, so it’s bullshit that we cannot go see each other.” He told Max. “Our engine is shit this year, and the car isn’t much better, so I need my Maxy to cheer me up when I get sad about it all.” He whined with a big pout.

Max let out a long, deep sigh and shook his head. “Charles….you know I love you.” He started, choosing his words carefully. “But I cannot let you sneak out of your hotel room to come and see me. The consequences of being caught would be insane.” He said and placed a gentle kiss on his lover’s lips. “Besides, just think of how amazing it’ll feel to touch each other after being forced apart for a whole week.” He whispered.

Charles sighed deeply at Max and finally just shrugged a little. “Fiiiiiiiiine. But the sex next week better be freaking amazing or I won’t stay away another whole week again.” He added as he nuzzled back into Max and closed his eyes. “Goodnight, Maxy. I love you.” He said quietly, making Max smile. “Sweet dreams, babe. I love you too.”

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

At the race weekend itself, their already slightly dampened moods only got worse. Qualifying was a relative disaster for the both of them. Despite Red Bull having, as they called it themselves ‘the best winter in years’ they were far behind Mercedes again as the season started, despite giving themselves a real shot at the title this year. They already figured during free practice that they’d probably be behind again, but Max had really hoped to keep it below 2 tenths to give himself a shot at the title. Instead, the gap was over half a second.

For Ferrari, the situation was much worse. Charles had only managed to qualify in 7th after an incredible lap, and it really seemed like they were just going to be a midfield team this season, given Sebastian couldn’t even get into Q3. A result absolutely unacceptable for a team with the stature of the Scuderia.

After qualifying, Charles just found himself moping back in his hotel room. He had gotten through the press questions as quickly as he possible could and couldn’t even bring himself to watch Max’s press conference. He just was too disappointed. In himself, in the team, in everyone around him, really. It just wasn’t good enough.

Max returned to his own hotel room about an hour later, after finishing up at the track with all his top-3 duties. He noticed he hadn’t yet received any messages or calls from Charles, which was surprising him a little. He thought he’d at least have a text or so congratulating him on a good lap. So he went to take a shower, laid down comfortably on his bed, and called his boyfriend to talk to him.

Charles had mostly been staring out the window or flipping through channels on the tv while not understanding a single word of what was said when his phone finally started ringing. He groaned a little when he saw Max’s name. He didn’t really want to talk to anyone, but it wasn’t like he could possible ignore his boyfriend. So he finally reluctantly picked up his phone and answered the call. ‘’Hey…’’ He said quietly.

Max frowned at the manner in which Charles answered the phone and hummed a little. ‘’Hey, babe. Are you okay? You’re sounding a little….off.’’ He told Charles, who sighed softly. ‘’I’m just disappointed. Didn’t really wanna talk to anyone…’’ He admitted.

Max shook his head and smiled a little to himself. Charles was so extremely competitive and so predictable that even when he outdrove his car, he was still disappointed that he wasn’t further towards the head of the field. ‘’You’re being ridiculous, Charlie.’’ He told his boyfriend, who scoffed. ‘’No, I’m not! I got the most pole positions out of anyone last year and now I’m 7th! 7th Maxy!’’ Charles replied with another deep sigh.

Max rolled his eyes then and started to chuckle a little. ‘’Your competitiveness is gonna be the end of you one day, babe.’’ He told his boyfriend with a fond smile. ‘’You did absolutely amazing though. You easily beat Seb and your lap was incredible. It’s not like it’s your fault that your car isn’t amazing. Your job is to get the best out of that thing and you did! And then some!’’

Charles couldn’t help but smile a little at Max’s attempts to cheer him up and hummed softly. ‘’You really think so?’’ He asked Max, who grinned, knowing he had Charles exactly where he wanted him. ‘’Yes I do, babe. You know I only used to dislike you cause you’re the only driver who can pretty much keep up with me.’’ He said, making Charles scoff.

‘’Keep up? I’m faster than you I’ll have you know, Verstappen.’’ Charles replied as he rolled his eyes, making Max laugh. ‘’Sure you are babe. Do you feel a little better though?’’ He asked with a soft hum. Charles sighed again, but less of utter frustration this time, and more because he really wanted to be with Max right now, kissing him as thanks for making him feel better. 

‘’Yeah, I guess so.’’ Charles finally said with the tiniest of smiles. ‘’Thank you, Maxy.’’ He added, before he smiled a little more. ‘’You did really great though. Sucks that those freaking Mercedes are in front again though.’’ He said and sighed deeply.

Max hummed softly and response and shrugged a little. ‘’Yeah, but we kind of expected as much. It’s alright. As long as we’re getting closer through the season, things should be a lot more interesting next year.’’ He told Charles, before he heard a knock on his door. 

‘’Damn. Sorry babe, I have to go. Have to do another interview I forgot about.’’ Max said and sighed softly. ‘’That’s okay.’’ Charles was quick to say. ‘’Thank you for calling me, I feel a lot better.’’ He admitted to Max. ‘’I love you and we’ll talk later.’’ Max smiled at those words, like he always did when Charles said them, and nodded. ‘’Love you too, babe. Bye for now.’’ He said, before ending the call.

Both Charles and Max spent that day and the time the next day until the race pretty similarly. It was time filled with sponsor talks, press interviews, Q&As and strategy sessions with their teams. They didn’t really have any time for each other besides a quick good night message before bed, and only saw each other again on the grid. Which was….difficult, but they managed to just great each other with an elbow bump and a nod before walking on, instead of making out in front of the tv cameras.

The race itself was an absolute rollercoaster. Both Max and Charles remained in their respective positions for the opening laps of the race, but that was the end of the calmness. In the 11th lap of the race, Max’s engine suddenly gave out on the second straight, and he couldn’t believe this was happening to him again. ‘’NO POWER, NO POWER!’’ He called on the radio, but it was already too late. ‘’I’m sorry, Max. Nothing we can do from here. Park the car, we have to retire.’’ His race-engineer replied, sounding just as defeated as Max felt.

Max absolutely lost it. He was more than sure they had the pace to win this race, to go first in the championship, to finally take the fight to those goddamn Germans and their incredible cars. This was so fucking unfair and the endless string of curses that he yelled into the void only helped a little bit to calm him down.

As he went down the straight, Charles suddenly saw a slow driving Red Bull on the side. He looked with wide eyes, and he kind of already knew the answer as he asked. ‘’Is that Max?’’ He asked his engineer. ‘’Yes, Verstappen is out we are P6. P6.’’ The man confirmed, after which Charles cursed under his breath. He wanted to win, but fairly, not with Max having technical issues.

He shook his head then. He had to stay focused, had to do his best to get the best possible result out of this race. He could deal with Max afterwards, keep private and racing life separate. From there on out Charles managed to somehow stay mostly out of trouble, despite the race falling into complete and utter chaos. In the end, he crossed the line in a completely unexpected P3, which was even upgraded to P2 after Lewis’ penalty.

Max didn’t even end up watching the end of the race. When he left, Charles was still stuck in P6 and with his own race long since gone, there was absolutely nothing to stay there for. He went back to his hotel to mope and be grumpy, while Charles remained at the circuit for the celebrations and the champagne. 

The Monegasque excitedly celebrated his podium with Valtteri and especially Lando. He looked in the crowd a few times to see if Max was there, but as he didn’t see him, he figured he would be celebrating with his boyfriend later on. 

As time went on though, and Charles celebrated for a little while longer with his team, Max continued to be a no-show. Charles got more and more annoyed with his boyfriend. Yes he hadn’t been there either for Max the day before, but that was just a qualifying. And Max had only been third then! This was a race. In which Charles had scored a completely unexpected second. Celebrating was in order, and Charles was feeling genuinely hurt that Max hadn’t even bothered to stay and watch him.

On the drive back to the hotel, Charles only continued to get more worked up about this. Max should’ve been there. He might’ve been disappointed about his own race, but that really wasn’t an excuse for not at all supporting the man he supposedly loved. Charles would’ve stayed if he was in Max’s shoes. He was…pretty sure of it.

Thankfully, they stayed in the same hotel, albeit on different floors. Still, with most people still stuck at the circuit, sneaking over to Max’s room wasn’t the most difficult thing in the world. As soon as he had put his trophy and giant champagne bottle down, Charles stormed over and loudly knocked on Max’s door, the latter opening it a minute later.

Max had clearly just come out of the shower and was just wearing a towel, but this wasn’t a time where Charles would be getting distracted by that. He crossed his arms and narrowed his eyes a little, before he sucked in a deep breath and said four ominous words. ‘’We need to talk.’’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who is ready for some DRA-MA?


	13. Cars & Feelings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dramaaaaa....ish. I promise there is more on the way, you just don't know it yet :D

“We need to talk.”

Max just blinked a few times in confusion for a second, before he was able to respond to Charles’ words. “Hey…Charlie…” He said, looking just incredibly confused as to what exactly was happening. Had he done something wrong? Did something happen? He glanced into the hallway behind his boyfriend and, when he didn’t see anyone else, pulled the Monegasque inside, closing the door behind him. “We…what? How? Why? Why are you here? I thought we said no contact until we got back home…?”

“Yeah, we did. But then things happened and I needed to talk to you in person instead of just over the phone, so here I am.” Charles replied. He was still wearing his Ferrari kit and leaned against the wall of Max’s suite as he looked his boyfriend up and down. “But maybe you want to get dressed first before we do?” Max looked down at himself then, seemingly having forgotten that he was still naked. “Oh…right.” He said sheepishly. This whole situation was incredibly confusing to him. He had still been moping in the shower, cursing at everyone and everything and just being angry at the whole world in general when Charles arrived, and his mind was having some trouble with this sudden shift. 

Max walked back into the bathroom to go and get dressed, while Charles walked over to the sitting area of his boyfriend’s suite, sighing softly as he saw some pillows lying around on the floor that were probably thrown about in anger. Max was angry, he understood that. But for months now, Charles had been talking about how bad this season was going to be, how they’d even have to fight for points. And now that he managed an incredible race to end up on the freaking podium, the man he’d opened his heart to hadn’t even shown up to support him. That really fucking stung, and he needed Max to know that.

Max had quickly put on some underwear and sweatpants in the bathroom and hurriedly walked back out over to Charles, looking more concerned than anything. ‘’What’s wrong then Charles? It must be pretty bad if you couldn’t tell me over the phone.’’ Max told Charles, who didn’t really seem to react to his words.

‘’Why weren’t you there at the podium celebrations?’’ Charles finally asked as he stared Max down. ‘’I looked for you everywhere, asked around where you were, but they told me you’d left already.’’ Max stared at Charles for a few second, before he just let out a disbelieving laugh. ‘’Seriously? Seriously Charlie, that’s why you’re here? I might’ve just lost the fucking world championship out there because of ANOTHER engine issue and you wanted me to come and celebrate your 10th or so little trophy? That’s fucking bullshit and you know it.’’ He replied, instantly getting worked up at the accusatory tone Charles was using on him.

Charles frowned at Max’s sudden change in behaviour and narrowed his eyes a little. ‘’I expected you to be a supportive boyfriend and be happy for the man you supposedly love. I don’t even have a fucking text from you, Max. Were you going to say anything? At all? I would’ve been there for you at the podium, cheering you on, even if I had suffered a DNF.’’ 

Max’s expression only hardened and he shook his head, not believing what he was hearing. ‘’Un fucking believable. Do you even remember how you were moping yesterday? How you didn’t even want to talk to anyone at all? How I had to call you to get a response from you and how I had to be the one to cheer you up? And now my race was over after 11 laps and I am the one that has to be excited for you? I am entitled to my anger Charles. To my disappointment. You are not in charge of how I feel.’’ He was moments away from saying something much more hurtful, but he managed to swallow the words down so that the situation wouldn’t escalate too much.

‘’Besides, you were still in P-fucking-6 when I left. Nobody in their right mind would’ve predicted that pile or red coloured trash to make it to the podium. Not even with you behind the wheel.’’ Max added. Charles got up then, only getting angrier. ‘’Yesterday was totally different and you know it Max! We were both disappointed! ’’ He insisted to his boyfriend.

‘’And besides, yesterday was only qualifying! We both know that you don’t celebrate a P3 in qualifying, but you do celebrate a completely unexpected podium in a crazy race! And this wasn’t even a measly P3. I got P2 Max. P2. With Lando in third. Who you weren’t there for either, by the way.’’ He closed his eyes for a second then, mentally telling himself to calm down so that they wouldn’t have a repeat of the time Max came over to his apartment.

‘’You just….you really don’t understand, do you?’’ Charles insisted, the yelling subsiding for a quieter, but still very angry tone of voice. ‘’No, apparently I don’t, Charles. Apparently I’m not allowed to be disappointed in losing a possible race win and should just be a mindless cheerleader for my boyfriend. Of fucking course I would’ve congratulated you at some point. And been happy for you. But you KNOW I need time to deal with things like this and I cannot fucking believable that you of all people don’t understand that!’’ Max was just feeling so lost. This was bullshit, all of it. That fucking race, the DNF, and now Charles being mad because he was angry? No. Fuck all of this.

Charles stayed quiet for a second as Max continued to yell loudly. ‘’This isn’t working.’’ He finally said, letting himself fall back down into the chair he’d been sitting in. Max stared at Charles for a moment, feeling his heart sinking and the air suddenly knocked out of his lungs as his knees gave in and he sat down on the couch. ‘’You mean…us?’’ He asked quietly, staring at Charles with a look of utter surprise and disbelief.

‘’What? Oh…fuck…I…No, Maxy. Not us.’’ Charles said quickly, stumbling a little over his words as he tried to reassure his boyfriend as quickly as he possibly could. ‘’No I just…I just mean that things aren’t working like this. If we try and keep this up it is gonna tear us apart, Maxy.’’ He told his boyfriend, reaching out and taking the Dutchman’s hand into his own.

‘’There will come a moment where either of us will be so upset at something that happened over the weekend the we lash out and say something we regret. That’s just the way we are…Or we’ll get upset over a race win that the other doesn’t really want to celebrate immediately because they didn’t even finish…’’ Charles let out a long and deep sigh, before he looked into Max’s eyes. ‘’So, I’m really sorry about your DNF. I hated seeing you like that when I drove past. You deserved so much more. But I’m still really, really fucking happy about my podium.’’

Max allowed himself a little smile just a little bit at Charles’ words and pulled at the Monegasque’s hand until he came over and sat down next to Max. ‘’Thank you, Charlie. It’s nice to hear that from you.’’ He said and gave his lover a gentle kiss. ‘’And…congratulations on the podium. I…haven’t seen the race yet, but you must’ve driven like a legend to end up on there.’’

Charles finally laughed a little at Max and nodded softly. ‘’Yeah, I kinda did.’’ He admitted with a grin, feeling very proud of himself. He leaned in to kiss his boyfriend then, and only stopped when they were rudely interrupted by a knock on the door. ‘’Max, you alright? I heard a lot of yelling.’’ It sounded.

Max groaned as he pulled away from Charles and have him an apologetic look, but finally got up and went to the door to find his race-engineer on the other side. ‘’Hey, you alright?’’ The man asked. ‘’It sounded quite heated in there, who are you with…?’’ He asked, glancing past Max into the room, but not seeing anything. ‘’Yeah, I’m fine.’’ Max said and sighed deeply. ‘’I mean, I’m not fine given that we didn’t fucking finish, but….I’m fine.’’ He added. ‘’So…I’m kinda with Charles right now…’’ He added, making the other man get a little wide-eyed as he saw Max’s current state of undress.

‘’Oh…I uhm…I can come back later.’’ He assured Max, taking a few steps back. ‘’Just send me a text whenever you’re ready and I’ll come over then.’’ He said, before he quickly left. Only as he walked away did Max realise what was actually happening here. ‘’No, Gianpiero. It’s not…’’ Max started, but the man was out of earshot already. 

As he returned to the sitting room, Charles was just sitting there with the biggest grin on his face, apparently having heard the entire conversation. ‘’Fuck you.’’ Max just said, sitting back down as Charles laughed at him. ‘’I mean, if you insist?’’ The Monegasque replied. ‘’Your engineer is already convinced we were in the middle of it anyway and I could use some celebrating with my boyfriend…’’ He added, raising a curious eyebrow at Max.

Max just sighed softly again and shook his head. ‘’Fuck, Charles. I…you know I would absolutely love to, but…I’m just really not in the mood for anything like that right now. You understand, right?’’ Charles nodded softly in response and leaned over to give Max another kiss. ‘’Yeah, I understand.’’ He said with a smile. ‘’Do you want to come back to my room though? We can have some more of my champagne and hang out together.’’ He suggested, to which Max shook his head.

‘’As lovely as that sounds, duty still calls babe, as you’ve just heard. So I’ll just see you tomorrow at your place like we planned, alright?’’ Max suggested with a sweet smile. Charles let out a defeated sigh in response to that, but still finally shrugged. ‘’Yeah, I guess so…’’ He mumbled, getting up from his seat. ‘’Text or call me if you get sad again, although I might be a little drunk on champagne when you do.’’ He told his boyfriend with a chuckle. ‘’Love you, Maxy. See you tomorrow.’’ He said and gave Max a final goodbye kiss, before he finally left.

They spent the rest of their days on duties and or celebrations, with the both of them flying back home to Monaco the next day, albeit on separate flights. In the end, Max didn’t even bother going to his own place, and went straight to Charles’ apartment from the airport. He got in easily now that Charles had given him his own key, and found his boyfriend in the kitchen, making lunch for the both of them. 

Max dropped his bags in the living room and walked over to the kitchen, where he hugged Charles from behind and instantly started placing kisses in the man’s neck. ‘’Hi there, gorgeous.’’ He said and sighed happily. ‘’Fancy seeing you here.’’ Charles hummed softly and smiled brightly when he felt Max’s arms and lips. ‘’Someone’s in a very different mood than he was yesterday.’’ He noticed happily.

‘’Uh huh. Told you I just needed some time to deal with it.’’ Max replied. ‘’Now I’m just really fucking happy to be back in private with my incredibly hot boyfriend.’’ He added, giving Charles’ neck another couple of kisses for good measure. ‘’Love you, babe.’’ He told the Monegasque, who smiled brightly. ‘’Love you too, Maxy.’’ He said, as he finished up their salads.

They sat down together at the breakfast bar to eat and after a few bites, Charles decided to continue where they had left off the day before as they ate lunch. ‘’So…remember when I said that it wasn’t working?’’ He asked Max, who gave Charles a genuine ‘Are you fucking serious right now’-look. ‘’You mean the time when you very nearly gave me a heart attack? Yeah I kind of remember that, Charlie.’’ Max replied in an annoyed tone. It was still a fucked up thing to say.

‘’Yeah so I wanted to talk to you about that now…’’ Charles said and sighed softly. It was a bit of a sensitive subject for the both of them, but for the good of their relationship, they had to talk about it. ‘’So we probably need to lay down some ground rules with respect to the race weekends and how we act around and towards one another.’’

‘’Okay…’’ Max said and frowned a little. ‘’Such as…?’’ Charles took another deep breath, before he continued. ‘’So, I’m thinking that we just should talk as little about the race weekend as possible during the race weekend itself. Like on Friday and Saturday. Then we can’t really get annoyed with each other either. And as a general rule, maybe we should wait at least a couple of hours after the chequered flag until we react on it and each other’s? So we can calm down a little emotionally about how it went.’’

Max continued to frown as he listened to Charles, but finally nodded softly. ‘’Okay…’’ He said again. ‘’I mean really if I think about it we should just accept that the disappointed feelings come first. The congratulations if you did well will come eventually, it may just take a while.’’ He said, making Charles nod quickly. ‘’Yeah, exactly. That’s kind of what I meant to say!’’ He added excitedly, pleased Max was getting him. ‘’Well that’s mostly settled then.’’ He said and chuckled softly. ‘’The precise details will probably come as we race, but at least we won’t just get mad at each other out of nowhere anymore.’’

Max nodded softly in return and finished the last bit of his salad, before he looked at Charles. ‘’So, now that that’s all over with, will you allow me to finally take you to the bedroom to congratulate you properly on your podium?’’ He asked with a little hint of a smirk, making Charles grin. ‘’I would love nothing more.’’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm going to be going through the season a little quicker now, only really stopping at the points where it gets interesting. It's gonna get fun now...


	14. Celebrations & Sharing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MORE DRAMA. HERE WE F-ING GO.
> 
> If you have any comments at all, let me know! I love to read them all! :D

The next couple of Grands Prix went a lot better for both Max and Charles from at least a personal standpoint. They both still weren’t where they wanted to be when it came to the actual racing, but at least they weren’t fighting over it anymore. Max was still getting his podiums, and Charles was switching between DNFs and great races, the average being about what they were expecting. At least they thankfully weren’t fighting over it anymore. It all changed though, when they got to the absolutely bonkers British Grand Prix.

Max and Charles had somehow spent 49 out of 49 laps in the exact same positions so far, with Charles in a commendable 4th and Max in 3rd, when all things went crazy. First Bottas’ tyre blew, sending Max into 2nd and Charles onto the podium. Then, Max had to come in for a stop, because his tyres were on the verge as well. He had more than enough margin on Charles to stay in front, but it meant that when Lewis’ tyre blew as well, Max had to drive like crazy to try and catch up with him. 

As the lap went on, the gap got smaller and smaller. Thirty seconds, twenty seconds, ten seconds, eight seconds, but when he crossed the line, there was still a five second gap remaining, still keeping Max from his first win of the season. He wasn’t overly disappointed though. He had to make a stop for the sake of his own tyres and much more importantly, when he looked on the tower next to the pit exit, he saw car number 16 had finished in third. Charles was going to be right up there with him on the podium!

Charles was absolutely ecstatic as he crossed the line in third place. ‘’Boom! That’s how we do it!’’ He called out excitedly. ‘’P3, P3!’’ He laughed happily in the car, already extremely excited at the prospect of being able to celebrate on the podium together with Max as boyfriends for the very first time. He took his time on the slow lap, calming himself down a little as he didn’t want to do anything stupid, before he drove back into the pits as parked his car at the big 3.

He stepped out of the car and grinned when he saw Max was already waiting for him. He quickly went over and gave him a tight, but quick hug. ‘’Well done!’’ He said happily, constantly aware of the cameras in their faces. Max managed to give Charles a wink in return, before they quickly went off to do the pre-podium interviews.

Once those were finally over with, and the national anthems for both Lewis and Mercedes finally finished playing, it was at last time for the champagne. After first spraying Lewis like they were obliged to, Max and Charles only had eyes for each other. When they were done, the both of them were absolutely soaked with champagne from top to bottom, and grinning like two absolute idiots.

They left the podium with their trophies, and, as soon as it was possible with all the duties they had to perform as podium finishers, took a moment to themselves. Charles led Max into an empty and somewhat secluded area behind the Ferrari garage, where he pinned his boyfriend against the wall and kissed him deeply. ‘’I just couldn’t fucking wait any longer.’’ He whispered as he pulled away, taking a deep breath. ‘’I just had to kiss you. We were on the fucking podium together, Maxy.’’

‘’Neither could I babe.’’ Max replied, before he pulled Charles back in and kissed him. They should’ve heard, they really should’ve fucking heard. But either their ears were still full with champagne, the adrenaline had still clogged their ears, or they were just too focused on each other, because they didn’t. They somehow missed Will Buxton and F1TV turning the corner, chatting live about Charles’ podium as Max and Charles ended up in full view on camera. They pulled away as quickly as they possibly could, but it was too late already.  
As soon as the cameraman saw what was happening, he moved the image away, but both Max and Charles knew that those images would be all over the internet in a matter of minutes. Max was silent for a second, before he punched the wall of the Ferrari motorhome with a loud scream of frustration. ‘’FUCK.’’ He called out, taking Charles’ hand and storming off with his boyfriend without a single word to either the cameraman or Will. There wasn’t a moment to lose now.

As Max dragged him along, Charles felt more numb than anything else. This wasn’t supposed to happen. They had rules, they had talked about this. With each other, with their teams, with their families. And by taking Max there and kissing him, Charles had broken their rules and would now be forced to face the consequences. Fuck, Max was going to be so angry with him. Everyone was…

Max dragged Charles into the private room he had in the Red Bull motorhome and locked the door behind them. He finally let go of Charles’ hand then, walking around the room in circles as he cursed under his breath. ‘’Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. Why the fuck didn’t I pay attention?’’ He asked himself, si fucking angry before he finally noticed the state Charles was in. 

He quickly closed the distance between the two of them again and sat down with his boyfriend on the couch, holding both of his hands in his own. ‘’Charlie, are you okay?’’ He asked quietly, instantly turning from angry to concerned boyfriend as he saw Charles needed him.

At Max’s question, Charles finally came a little to himself again and let out a long, deep sigh. ‘’I…I don’t know.’’ He said quietly, after staying silent for a worryingly long time. ‘’I mean, on the one hand…I love you, and I want everyone in the entire world to know that I do.’’ He said, making Max smile lovingly at his boyfriend, even at this very worrying time. ‘’On the other….god, the backlash Maxy. People warned me about this. We’ll be hated, we’ll have to go through so much. I-I wanted to tell the world, but at our own pace, not yet. I’m so sorry I ruined it…I ruined everything’’

Max nodded softly in return and placed a little kiss on Charles’ hand, before he just pulled the man in close entirely. ‘’I understand, Charlie. And I’m not mad at you either, you didn’t ruin anything at all. I probably would’ve done the same to you if you hadn’t been the one to kiss me first.” He said quietly, gently rubbing his boyfriend’s arm a little as he tried to calm him down. ‘’But hard as it is to accept, what is done is now done. It’s going to be out there, whether we like it or not. So I’m thinking…’’ Max stayed quiet then as he bit his lip, prompting Charles to look up into his eyes.

He could read Max’s thoughts almost instantly, and he closed his eyes for a second as he did. ‘’You want to just come out ahead of it before the rumours get too much…’’ He said, to which Max nodded softly. ‘’Yeah…I do. Would that be alright with you, babe?’’ He asked quietly. He didn’t want to push Charles on this, but they would have to do something. Sooner or later the images would be everywhere, the rumours would start going crazy, and their teams’ PR people would force them to do this or that. Max wanted to do this now, as their own decision.

Charles finally nodded softly in response. ‘’Yeah, okay. How…What would you want to do then?’’ He asked, looking a little confused at Max, who hummed softly. ‘’Well what I was thinking was I could take a cute picture of us together now where I kiss your cheek and maybe a caption congratulating my boyfriend on his incredible podium…?’’ He suggested. Charles frowned slightly as he thought deeply about the suggestion, before he finally nodded. ‘’Yeah, alright. That sounds alright to me. But can I see the caption first?’’

‘’Of course!’’ Max said quickly. ‘’It would feel weird to post things about you without you looking at it first.’’ He assured Charles, before he got out his phone. It was already exploding a little with messages and notifications, but he decided to ignore those for the time being. Instead, he got the both of them in an acceptable position, before he finally kissed Charles’ cheek and snapped the picture, while Charles managed a happy smile as he looked into the camera.

Max chuckled to himself as he saw the picture and shook his head. ‘’How do you look incredible on any picture ever taken of you?’’ He asked in disbelief, before he went onto Instagram and uploaded the picture, tagging Charles in it and writing the caption ‘’I am so proud of you, babe! Our first real podium together! @charles_leclerc #P3 #P2 #F1’’ Once he was pleased with the way it all looked, he finally showed it to Charles. ‘’How’s this, babe?’’

Charles looked at the photo and caption and had to admit that it looked really, really cute. Max had his arm wrapped around him, and they just seemed to be really happy together. He took a long and deep breath, before he finally hit ‘Share’ on Max’s phone, thereby forever posting the picture onto the internet. ‘’Oh god…’’ He mumbled afterwards, just sitting there for a second with his head in his hands. ‘’I can’t believe that just actually happened and it’s real.’’

Max put his phone away then and started to gently rub Charles’ back. ‘’You know that I love you, right? And that whatever happens I will support you and us 100%?’’ He asked his boyfriend, who nodded softly and finally cuddled to Max’s side again, resting his head on the Dutchman’s shoulder. ‘’I know, Maxy.’’ He said and gave the man a little smile. ‘’I just…I worry about everything that’s gonna come at us now.’’ He admitted with a small sigh. ‘’I just wanted to enjoy you all to myself for a little longer.’’

Max smiled at that and leaned in, giving Charles a long, gentle kiss. ‘’You still have me all to yourself, babe. Whenever it’s just the two of us together, I’m all yours. Maybe even more so in general now, too. We don’t have to hide anymore. I could just hold your hand whenever I want to….although that would probably look a little weird given all the wash your hands things…Bad example. The point still stands though. Maybe we could even start sharing hotel rooms now!’’

Charles started to chuckle at Max’s words and shook his head. ‘’God, you’re an idiot.’’ He said and sighed happily. ‘’But you’re my idiot.’’ He added with a grin. He leaned in to kiss Max again, but was rudely interrupted as they heard banging on the door. ‘’Max, are you in there?’’ Christian called out. ‘’I think you’re aware of what just happened and we need to talk about what to do.’’ Max winced even as he just heard the question and sighed deeply as he looked at Charles. ‘’You can stay, babe. This concerns you, too.’’ He told his boyfriend, giving him a quick peck on the lips before he got up and let his team principal into the room.

Christian closed the door behind him and sighed deeply when he walked in and saw that Max’s boyfriend was there, too. “Hi Max, Charles.” He greeted them as he sat down. “So….like I said before, nobody in the entire team is against this relationship in general. You love each other and everything and that’s great. However it does put it into a weird position, given that you two will be racing each other…You’re rivals, not just lovers.” He sighed again.

“So you need to come out ahead of this now, show the world something besides those 2 seconds of footage. And then on Thursday’s media day, you can give a shared interview or Q&A session. Assure the world that you both will drive as fast as you ever have and fight like true rivals. We need to get any rumours of you two going easy on each other out of the way as quickly as we can.” Christian told the pair.

Max smiled softly and hummed as he listened to Christian talk. He sat back down with Charles and took his boyfriend’s hand, just wanting to be there for him as he seemed to be taking all of this a lot harder. ‘’All fine with me. I already sent out a picture on Instagram about it, you should check that out.’’ He told Christian. ‘’As far as an interview is concerned I’m good, what about you Charlie?’’

Charles nodded softly in response and smiled a little when Max took his hand again. “I agree in principal, but I will need to talk to my team first before it’s a definite yes.” He told Christian. “I will get back to you on it.” He took a deep breath and gave Max a quick kiss, before he finally got up. “I’ll go and talk to them now then.” He told the men.

Max frowned softly and reached out again for Charles, not really wanting him to just leave. “Want me to come with for support?” He asked, to which the Monegasque shook his head. “I’ll be alright. I kind of have to do this on my own.” He assured his boyfriend with a smile. He thanked Christian for the support, before he finally left the room and went on his way.

Christian waited for Charles to leave, before he sighed again and looked at his driver. ‘’This is going to become a hell at first, you understand that, right? Even more so for him than for you. The Italian press is going to vilify him for this and you need to be there for him. I’ve had my own share of tabloids to deal with concerning my wife, so trust me that I know what I’m talking about.’’

Max nodded in response to Christian and sat back against the back of the couch, sinking into a little. ‘’Yeah…’’ He said and sighed deeply. ‘’Can you take care of me and Charles being around each other with all the bubble regulations and stuff? I’m going to be there for him anyhow and I don’t want to sneak around anymore.’’ He told Christian, making the man chuckle. ‘’I will. Now come on, we need to speak to the PR team on how to handle this.’’

The situation at Ferrari when Charles got there could not have been more different than the calm, albeit slightly disappointed way at which Red Bull handled the sudden developments. They were beyond furious with Charles. Accusing him of going behind their backs, announcing this anyway when they had a specific agreement not to. Charles’ explanations barely seemed to have any effect at all.

Charles however, managed to just take it all in. He had already dealt with so much hardship in his life that he told himself he could easily take some more if it meant being with the man he loved. His Maxy. Charles spent hour after hour in meetings that day. With team management, PR people, even higher ups from Ferrari HQ in Italy themselves. He only got back to the hotel around midnight after Ferrari, in true Ferrari fashion, had decided not to say a word on the matter to the press and ordered Charles to stay quiet as well. He didn’t care either way. He had already decided to do the interview on Thursday, and they’d deal with the fallout afterwards. Just he and Max. Together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time: Interviews, drama, other things...?


	15. A Love Exposed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I personally really like this chapter. It was so fun to write. And Dan's finally in it! And we all love us some Dan <3

When Max finally left the Red Bull motorhome at about 8 in the evening, he had to sigh a little when he saw that the lights still on at Ferrari, and people walking around upstairs, seemingly still in heavy talks. He expected Charles wouldn’t get back to the hotel for at least a while longer, but Max really did not want to spend any more time at the track than he already had. It had been an insanely long day already, and he desperately needed some quiet. So, he decided to head back to the hotel, sending Charles a text on the way. ‘’I’m on my way back. I’ll wait for you in your room. Love you.’’

He checked his phone a few times on the way, but the text didn’t show as read, so Max wasn’t really expecting a text back soon either. He went upstairs when he got back to the hotel and used his spare key to go into Charles’ room, laying down on the bed with a long, deep sigh. Alone, finally. The talks with the team hadn’t been terrible. They had really just been continuations on the ones they’d had when they first announced their relationship to the team, only now things were focused on how to talk to the media, rather than how to keep it secret.

Max then decided to do the absolute worst thing that anyone could ever possibly do in the history of the universe: he started reading the internet comments. Specifically, the comments to his picture with Charles. It started off okay. The comments with the most likes were ones that were shocked, people that were happy for them, all that kind of stuff. But then he came to the abusive comments. And there were a lot of them. A lot. So many and so incredibly fucking disgusting that it actually made Max physically nauseous to read them, and so he quickly put his phone away again, covering his eyes and taking a few deep breaths to calm himself down.

He would still have to read his texts from friends and family and what not, and he was about to, when his phone suddenly started ringing. Daniel. Max debated with himself for a while as to whether he should even pick up or not, but apparently Daniel was quite persistent and the phone just kept ringing, so in the end, he did.

‘’Hey Dan.’’ Max answered, a little surprised at how tired his own voice sounded. ‘’Heeeeey, Maxy. I was starting to wonder whether you’d actually answer me or not.’’ Dan said and started to laugh a little. ‘’But then I realized that it was me calling and you’d never dare ignore me, I’m way too awesome for that.’’ As annoyed as he was with the world. As tired as his entire body felt after a long race and an even longer talk with the team, Daniel never failed to cheer him up and as stupid as his joke was, Max couldn’t help but laugh.

‘’Theeeeere’s my Maxy.’’ Daniel said happily, glad he’d made his friend laugh again, he hadn’t sounded great when he picked up. ‘’So…you and our little Charlie boy then, eh? I’m not the kind of person to say that I told you so, but did I or did I not fucking tell you so?’’ Max fondly rolled his eyes at the question and the memory of Daniel repeatedly telling him so, before he hummed in response. ‘’Yeah, you did. And I still don’t know how you knew, because I didn’t even have a fucking crush on him a year ago, Dan!’’

Daniel just started laughing and shook his head. ‘’Oh Maxy. Oh my poor, dumb, stupid little Maxy. Even a blind man could see that you were into that pretty little French boy even then. You just had to figure it out yourself, too.’’ He said happily. ‘’Is he with you?’’ He asked curiously, making Max sigh. ‘’No. He’s still at the circuit I think, in talks with Ferrari. They didn’t take the relationship amazingly to begin with and I don’t think it’s really going great now…’’

‘’Oh…’’ Daniel replied and Max could just hear his frown. ‘’Well that sucks. We can’t have that. Well, as long as you know that there’s not a single driver on the grid who won’t support our little lovebirds. We’ll all stand by you.’’ Max smiled a little at that and nodded softly. ‘’Thanks Dan. That really means a lot. I mean…I kinda knew already, but it’s great to hear it nonetheless.’’ He heard a key being inserted into the electronic lock then, and quickly sat up. ‘’Oh, I think Charles is back. I gotta go. Thanks again for your call mate, it really meant a lot!’’ He told Dan. They quickly ended their call, and Max jumped off of the bed to head to the door.

Charles had been stuck in his head ever since he’d finally left the track after long, long talks within the team. He almost stumbled out of the elevator and to his room, feeling just so fucking tired. He didn’t even really notice that the lights were already on in the room once he entered, and so when he turned around to shut the door behind him, he nearly had a fucking heart attack when Max’s arms suddenly wrapped around him. ‘’AAHH-o-oh…’’ He let out, before he finally let out a shaky breath and let his weight lean against his boyfriend. ‘’Fuck…you scared me, Maxy.’’ He mumbled. 

Charles was trembling slightly in his arms, and he sounded so tired that Max was immediately feeling very worried for his boyfriend. ‘’I’m so sorry, love. Are you alright?’’ He asked quietly, holding Charles tightly as he kissed his cheek. The Monegasque finally shook his head a little and sighed deeply. ‘’No…’’ He mumbled. ‘’I’m just so tired. I listened to so many people. Read so many things. I just want to sleep.’’ He told Max, pulling away a little from the hug so they could move to the bed.

‘’Alright then. Come on, gorgeous.’’ Max told his boyfriend, guiding him over to the bed and laying down with him. Charles waited for Max to lie down on his back, before he cuddled in close and put his head down on the Dutchman’s chest with a long sigh. ‘’Everything’s different from now on.’’ He said quietly, as Max started to play with his hair.

‘’Not everything.’’ Max said quietly. ‘’We’re still the same. Your family’s still the same. Your relationship with Pierre and the others and all your friends is still the same. Really the only thing that’s different is that anonymous people now know. And do we really give a single fuck about what they think?’’ He asked Charles, humming quietly at him.

Charles took another deep breath. His expression softened a bit as he smelt Max’s familiar cologne and he hummed softly. ‘’We shouldn’t….I know we shouldn’t…but it’s hard not to. They showed me articles from sport websites, tabloid papers. They’re all so fucking mean to us, Maxy.’’ He said quietly. Max moved his hand from Charles’ hair to gently brush his thumb over the Monegasque’s cheekbone and hummed softly in return. ‘’They are.’’ He agreed quietly. 

‘’But my point still stands. Our families support us. Our friends support us. I talked to Daniel and all the drivers support us. Even your team management agreed in the end after some persuasion. You need to stop caring what everyone else in the world thinks about you Charlie, and start focusing on the opinions of people that are right here. For example, me.’’ Max said and smiled lovingly down at his boyfriend, only continuing once he finally met his gaze. ‘’I for one think that you’re absolutely incredible. You’re beautiful, you’re smart, you’re just the sweetest boy in the entire world, and I just fucking love you so much that it actually hurts me to see you like this.’’

Charles listened to Max and only after his boyfriend finished talking did he realize that he hadn’t been breathing. He sucked in a deep breath and bit down on his lip as he felt his eyes getting a little watery. ‘’I…fuck…Maxy…’’ He said quietly, unable to find the words to express his love and appreciation for the man. It prompted Max to smile and gently brush his thumb over Charles’ cheekbone again. ‘’I know.’’ He whispered, leaning in and gently placing his lips against his boyfriend’s. ‘’Come on then. I know it’s early, but we’ve both had a really, really long fucking day and we need our beauty sleep. Or well…at least I do.’’ He said and winked.

Both Max and Charles spent the next few days as much together as they possibly could. Especially Charles seemed to be taking it all pretty badly still. Max hadn’t looked at any stories or comments since that first picture together, but Charles just couldn’t help himself. He just had to read stories, blogs, tweets, it was almost like he was addicted and Max came really close to taking Charles’ phone away from him for his own good.

Eventually though, it was the Thursday of the 70th anniversary Grand Prix, and Red Bull and Ferrari had finally agreed to schedule an interview with Will Buxton and F1 TV. The interview would be recorded in advance, the questions would be asked specifically to put the whole thing in a positive light and have the boys tell their own story, and Max and Charles would be allowed to stop it whenever they started feeling uncomfortable.

They finally all sat down for the interview, and after the normal friendly introductions, the camera started to roll. ‘’So today I’m joined by the pair that everyone has been talking about for the past couple of days; Charles Leclerc and Max Verstappen. Guys, first of all, how are you?’’ Will introduced them.

The boys looked at each other for a moment, before Charles finally nervously rubbed his thighs for a second, took a deep breath, and started to speak. ‘’Yeah, we’re…alright, given the circumstances. To be honest with you we hadn’t really wanted to make all of this public yet, but we didn’t really have a choice.’’ He told Will, who looked a little guilty. ‘’Yeah…sorry about that.’’ He said, making Max and Charles laugh a little.

‘’That’s okay.’’ Max said. ‘’We’re not the subtlest of people anyway, so we probably would’ve messed up at some point.’’ He said, before Will continued. ‘’So, I think the first thing that people want to know is, how long has this been going on? When did it start? How did it happen? Or just, what’s your story?’’ He asked, giving them the freedom to say what they wanted.

‘’Yeah so, it started about 3.5 months ago, after Charles did his incredible charity stream for people suffering from depression in this pandemic. As you…might know, we had a bit of a falling out on that stream and I went over to his apartment the next day to apologize in person. It was then that we started to realize that the feelings that we already had for each other were mutual, and we started dating soon after.’’ Max explained, glancing at Charles a few times with a loving smile. 

Will couldn’t help but smile either at the way Charles and Max kept looking at one another as the latter spoke and nodded when he finished. ‘’Thank you very much. Now, something else that’s come up a lot is how your relationship is going to affect things out here on and around the track. Can you speak a little on that?’’ He asked next, looking at Charles, who nodded.

‘’Yeah, of course. We have actually put down some ground rules. There are obviously the normal rules about confidentiality and such things, but I am best friends with Pierre too, so those things stay the same and it’s not really a problem for us or the teams. It’s more that we are both fiercely competitive and so we need to make sure that we don’t fight too much about it.’’ Charles said and laughed a little.

‘’So really we talk as little as possible about the race weekend during the race weekend. And we try not to talk about the race until a couple of hours after the finish, so that we’ve lost a bit of the adrenaline.’’ He explained with a smile. Max decided to add a little to that and spoke up.

‘’Yeah exactly. And like Charles said, we are both fiercely competitive, so there is absolutely no way that I’d go easy on him out on track. If anything, I’d go even harder on him, because I don’t want to hear all about it at the end of the day.’’ He said, smiling brightly when Charles gave him a bit of a look.

Will chuckled a little at that too and asked his last question once the guys had their attention back on him. ‘’And finally, is there anything that you would like to say to any young people out there that are struggling?’’ He asked them.

Charles was quick to nod, this was a subject that he really cared a lot about. ‘’I’d love to.’’ He told Will. ‘’The most important thing that I want to say to anyone out there who needs to hear it, is that it’s always okay to be yourself, and come out for who you are. You are amazing, you are worth it, and even though it might not feel that way, there are always people out there who will love and accept you for who you are.’’ He said, taking a deep breath, before he continued. 

‘’And even more importantly, it is always okay to ask for help. I will admit that the whole pandemic was having a really bad impact on my mental health, and my friends and family…and later on this amazing guy right here, managed to pull me through it. But nothing will happen if you don’t tell people what you’re feeling. They can’t just sense it on you, you have to take that first step and trust that the ones you love will walk the path with you.’’ Charles swallowed thickly then, and reached out for Max’s hand.

Max was quick to take Charles’ hand when the Monegasque reached for him and just smiled lovingly at Charles, because that was really fucking brave of him to say. ‘’I love you. I’m so proud of you.’’ He whispered, before Will started talking again to finish up the interview. ‘’Well Charles, thank you for that very open and honest answer. I’m sure it will be very helpful to a lot of people out there. Now then, I’d like to thank you both for seeing me today and I’m sure we’ll talk again very soon.’’

The cameras stopped rolling then, and Max almost immediately got up and hugged Charles tightly. ‘’You are so fucking spectacular and brave.’’ He told his boyfriend, before he slowly pulled away, still holding on to the man’s hand. ‘’Alright everyone, thank you. We’re done here, yeah?’’ He said, asking his question as he looked at the Red Bull PR man, who nodded in response. 

‘’Good.’’ Max said and pulled Charles along with him, back to his private room. They sat down together on the couch, and Max smiled lovingly as he hugged Charles again. ‘’You were so fucking amazing out there, babe.’’ He repeated, making the Monegasque chuckle softly. Charles felt so relieved, like it was finally all going to be alright. Like they were really going to be alright. What more could he ask for?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time! The 70th anniversary GP! Other stuff! And we're catching up quickly to the actual season, so I'll get to make up my own mind on what happens in the races :D


	16. The Mind is a Dangerous Place to get Lost

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Charles is in a pretty bad place right now and just a warning...it's not going to get better anytime soon...
> 
> Please, if you like the fic, leave a comment! I love reading them :D

For the rest of the media day and really the entire race weekend of the 70th anniversary GP, both the teams and the F1 organization made sure that neither Max nor Charles would have to say another word on the matter after their short interview. They still had to do their normal press moments, but all journalists had been briefed that any questions regarding their personal lives would be completely out of the question.

Despite it still not really being allowed, Max moved into Charles’ hotel room as soon as they got back to the hotel for the weekend on Thursday. He just did so, without asking anyone whether it was allowed or not, since there really wasn’t anyone around who was going to tell him he couldn’t do that anyway. And even if they did, it wasn’t like Max really gave a single fuck. Charles was still not dealing amazingly will all the backlash he was getting, and Max wanted to be there for him if and when he needed him there.

For the time being though, with Max around to help him through it, Charles seemed fine. Or at the very least, he had seemed a lot better ever since he had broken down a little on Sunday evening and they’d had their little talk. It really seemed to have helped in Max’s eyes. Or…or Charles just hid it very well. Nonetheless, it didn’t seem to really impact his racing either, with Charles managing to take his Ferrari into Q3 while Seb was stuck in Q2.

The race went even better still for both of them. Max felt almost like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders. He didn’t have to keep things a secret anymore. The world now knew that he loved Charles Leclerc, and it made him absolutely fly out there. He was up to first past both Mercedes cars after just 15 laps, and he absolutely dominated the race from there on out, even having the time to joke around a little with his engineer as he seemed to cruise to his first win of the season.

It didn’t go much worse for Charles. He didn’t have the car to challenge for race wins of course, but he managed a very well deserved fourth place, only 10 seconds behind Bottas and 10 seconds clear of Albon. Better yet, he didn’t have to hold back his excitement for Max’s race win now that everyone knew about them. So as soon as he had parked his car after the race, he ran over, jumping into Max’s arms and hugging him tightly. ‘’Congratulations! I’m so proud of you!’’ He yelled, his excitement clear even through his helmet.

Max laughed happily and hugged Charles back, grinning as they pulled away. ‘’Thanks, babe. I’ll see you tonight, yeah?’’ He said and winked at Charles, before he was taken away for podium duties. Chuckling happily to himself Charles stepped away then, watching all of the podium ceremony before he went to his own press duties and finally back to the hotel, where they spent the night celebrating Max’s win.

The next week went a lot worse for Charles than the last one. First, Max had to stay behind in England, having to do work at the factory now that they were there anyway. They had planned to go back to Monaco together, but that wasn’t happening now. Then, Charles too got called to the factory, and that’s where it got even worse. Every time he walked through the building, he felt like everyone was staring at him. They had been before, but it seemed…different, now. They didn’t feel like stares of interest anymore, about him being Charles Leclerc the golden boy, but rather stares of judgement. He told himself he was just being paranoid, but it did nothing to go against the bad thoughts that were slowly creeping up again at the back of his mind.

The days at the factory were nothing compared to the nights in the hotel though. Without Max to stop him, Charles couldn’t help himself. He took in everything, from Italian late nights shows, to news articles, to even going onto twitter to look at what people were saying. Before even the second night in Italy was over, he found himself curled up in bed in the dark, feeling so fucking alone and judged by the world, but not wanting to call Max either since it was his own fault that he was feeling this way. 

It felt both like a relief and a bad omen that he hadn’t even finished his thought before his phone started ringing. Max. Fuck. Charles took a couple of deep breaths to calm himself down. He couldn’t let Max know how he was really feeling. His boyfriend was still all the way over in England, and making him worried wouldn’t help anyone. It was better if he just tried to deal with this on his own, at least until Thursday.

He finally picked up the phone and forced a smile so that his voice would sound a little happier. ‘’Heeeey, Maxy.’’ He said, closing his eyes as soon as he heard Max’s voice. On the one hand, it was so good to hear his voice again. On the other, it made Charles just want to burst out into tears, because he felt so fucking terrible and he really needed his boyfriend there. ‘’Hey, babe.’’ Max answered, clearly happy to hear from Charles, too.

‘’How are things at the factory? How are you doing?’’ He asked curiously, prompting Charles to bite his lip for a second. ‘’Things are…okay. We’re still struggling a little with the car and everything, but there’s some confidence that we’ll be able to turn things around soon enough.’’ He finally answered his boyfriend. Charles decided to completely ignore the question about himself and instead turned it back to Max. ‘’How are you, Maxy? Things good in England?’’

Max hummed softly, his smile clearly audible in his words. ‘’Things are really good. We’ve got some updates coming and with the temperatures in Spain we should have a great shot at it again this weekend.’’ He told Charles excitedly, before he realized that the Monegasque hadn’t really answered his question. ‘’But how are you doing, Charlie? You know I worry about you.’’

Charles smiled to himself over Max’s worry over him and sighed a little. ‘’I’m alright, Maxy. Really. I’m just really tired is all. Sunday was really long and the days at the factory aren’t much shorter.’’ He was lying of course, but he just needed Max not to worry right now. At least until they were back together.

‘’Alright, babe. If you say so.’’ Max replied. It didn’t really do much to take away his worries, but it wasn’t like he could really push Charles on the subject either. That would have to wait until they saw each other again on Thursday in Spain. They talked for a little while longer, until Max decided that he should probably go to sleep to be well rested in the morning.

The ended the call then, and Charles once again found himself in silence, all alone and really only feeling worse after getting to hear Max’s voice, but not being able to touch him or just even be around him. He spent the rest of the week in that mind-set, and was more than a little relieved when he finally stepped out of the plane in Spain. Max was so close he could almost feel him and it already did wonders to stop the worries in his mind a little.

Max had already arrived a little earlier and was already at the track, having secluded himself a little to prepare for the media day. He sighed when he heard a knock on the door and shook his head. ‘’Come on guys, I asked you for some quiet as I go through my briefing.’’ He said, before the door opened and Charles poked his head through the gap. ‘’Does that mean I should come back later…?’’

Max immediately started laughing at his boyfriend and jumped up from the couch, running over. He threw the door open and immediately pulled Charles inside, hugging him tightly. ‘’Hey, babe.’’ He said quietly, letting out a pleased sigh as he finally had Charles back in his arms. Charles instantly nuzzled into Max, only pulling away to give his boyfriend a kiss. ‘’God, I missed you so fucking much.’’ He admitted, before he just kissed Max again, unable to keep off of him.

‘’I can tell.’’ Max said and chuckled as he took Charles back to the couch and sat down with him. ‘’And I missed you too, babe. Even more than I thought I would if I’m honest.’’ He finally had a chance to take a proper look at his boyfriend then and couldn’t help but frown a little. ‘’Charlie…you look exhausted…’’ He gently put a hand on the man’s cheek and hummed softly, looking right into his eyes. ‘’Are you sure you’re okay?’’

Charles winced a little just as Max’s expression changed when he looked at him. He could feel the question coming and he didn’t really want to answer it. The truth was he had barely slept all week. Everything he’d heard and read just kept going through his mind over and over and over again and it kept him up endlessly. He just sighed deeply in response to Max and shrugged a little, cuddling in close. ‘’I don’t know.’’ He said quietly, swallowing hard.

‘’It’s difficult. I had to see and read all these things and the tv shows in Italy and Twitter….I haven’t really slept well all week.’’ Charles finally admitted, making Max sigh deeply as he pulled the Monegasque in as close as he could. ‘’I told you not to look at anything.’’ He said quietly, but made sure not to get angry with Charles. He really looked like any anger from Max at this point would just make him completely fall apart.

‘’I’m here now for you, Charles. And as long as I’m with you there’s nothing that will hurt you.’’ Max assured his boyfriend, placing a kiss on his head. ‘’We’ll go back to the hotel right after dinner and spend the entire evening in bed together so you can sleep as much as you need. Does that sound good to you, love?’’ He asked, making Charles nod softly. ‘’I’d like that a lot.’’

Max was pleased that Charles seemed a little more relaxed, but he was still disappointed with his boyfriend. ‘’I called you every single day, babe.’’ He told Charles quietly. ‘’Why didn’t you tell me before that you were feeling bad? Maybe I could’ve done something.’’ He said, making Charles shake his head. ‘’No, you couldn’t. And I didn’t say anything because that would only worry you. And you were busy at the factory all week so you had to focus on that.’’ 

Max couldn’t help but roll his eyes at that and sighed deeply. ‘’Charles, babe. Look at me.’’ He said, waiting patiently for Charles to move his head and look up at him. ‘’Nothing in this world is more important to me than you, okay? Not even racing. Remember what you said just last week? If you feel bad, you need to tell someone, otherwise they can’t help you out of it.’’ He said quietly. ‘’Will you please promise me that you’ll tell me next time? Please?’’

Charles winced when Max repeated his own words back at him. He was right of course, and Charles hated it. ‘’I….fine.’’ He mumbled, making Max chuckle. ‘’I’m gonna need more than that, love.’’ He said, making Charles sigh deeply. ‘’I promise, Maxy. I’ll tell you if I feel bad again.’’ He promised his boyfriend, before leaning up for a kiss. ‘’Have I told you lately how amazing you are?’’ He asked the Dutchman, who grinned in response. ‘’Not really, but I do love to hear it.’’

They spent the rest of the together as much as they possible could, only being apart when they were forced to for media events or strategy meetings within the team. For the most part, now that he was reunited with Max and his mind wasn’t running crazy anymore, the weekend went pretty good for Charles. They showed some promising speed in free practice, and he had even managed to qualify himself in Q3, with Seb once again not making it out of Q2.

In the race though, it all fell apart for Charles. Things hadn’t gone great, but they weren’t bad either. He was in the mix in the midfield, doing his laps, keeping things under control, when his engine suddenly turned itself off in lap 35. He spun in the last corner and in his panic to get things going again, had somehow managed to undo his seatbelt. To make matters worse, the team managed to remotely get the car going again, and instead of stopping for safety reasons, Charles in his competitive racing state just kept going, only getting back into the pits at the end of the lap after doing a lap at full speed without a seatbelt. 

His team couldn’t manage to get his seatbelt on again in the pits, and only once he had stepped out of the car did Charles realize how incredibly stupid he had been. He secluded himself from everyone else as he slowly started to panic again, his mind already racing about how the press was going to absolutely kill him for doing something so dangerous and irresponsible. And worse…how angry Max was going to be with him.

He took the decision then to not wait for Max to be done with his podium duties, and flew home to Monaco as quickly as he possibly could, not wanting to spend a minute longer at the track where everyone was judging him. When Max finally got back to Charles’ apartment hours after the Monegasque had gotten there, he was furious, to say the least. Charles could hear the door being opened, and winced as he heard it being slammed shut. ‘’CHARLES?!’’ Max called out. ‘’Where the fuck are you?!’’ Charles let out a long, deep sigh, before he finally got up from the couch and walked towards the door. ‘’Here, Max.’’

Max could see in how bad a shape Charles was, but right now, his anger won from his caring side. ‘’What the actual fuck, Charles? How could you just fucking leave me in Spain? We were going to fly home together.’’ He said angrily, throwing his bag down on the ground. ‘’I just…Things were bad and I just wanted to get home as soon as I could. I’m sorry, Maxy…’’ Charles said quietly. Max wasn’t done though.

‘’And that wasn’t even the worst fucking part. You drove. An entire fucking lap. Without seatbelts?’’ Max said, stopping each time for added emphasis. ‘’Do you have any fucking clue what could’ve happened out there? You could have DIED Charles. You drove over 250 kilometres an hour without a seatbelt! How could you do something so irresponsible, so stupid, so fucking idiotic?!’’ 

Charles almost got visibly smaller as Max yelled at him and finally just closed his eyes as he took it in. ‘’I’m sorry…’’ He finally said again. ‘’I’m sorry, Maxy, okay? I know it was stupid, but you know how it is. You try everything to stay in the race and I immediately pitted as soon as I could.’’ He told the Dutchman. It was a terrible excuse, but it really was all that he had. Fuck, he just felt so fucking terrible.

Max just sighed deeply at that and shook his head in disappointment, swallowing down what remained of his anger before he closed the distance to Charles and collected him in his arms. ‘’The most important thing is that you’re not hurt.’’ He told his boyfriend quietly. ‘’But…fucking hell Charles, you can’t make me worry like that.’’ He said as he placed a kiss on the Monegasque’s cheek. ‘’You need to be more careful or you’ll really get hurt doing something stupid like that.’’

Charles nodded softly. ‘’I know, Maxy.’’ He told his boyfriend, looking at him with a sad smile. ‘’Are you mad at me?’’ He asked then. He kind of knew the answer already after all the yelling, but he hoped it had passed now. ‘’I mean….yes?’’ Max answered. ‘’But not really? I’m just mostly relieved that you’re okay.’’

Charles nodded and blinked back a few times to keep back his tears. Fuck. Why was he this weak? Why couldn’t he just be like Max and have it all brush off of him? Why did he always have to care so much about what other people thought of him? Why did he have to make stupid decisions like driving without a seatbelt. Fuck. At least Spa was coming up soon. The track where he got his first win. Things would have to take a turn for the better there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Next time, we go to Spa!


	17. Racing & Regret

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...this one's pretty heavy, just a warning. Like I said last time, things aren't getting better for sweet Charles anytime soon...

Over the next few days, Charles seemed to be slowly getting a little better again. Max was as always a calming influence, at least on his mind, and because he absolutely insisted, Charles even went and played some videogames with some of the other guys. He was a little hesitant at first, but it turned out to be real good fun! It wasn’t Max’s jam, but Charles found Fall Guys to be absolutely amazing, and he was sure he’d get his boyfriend to play it before long.

He was almost back to himself by the next weekend, the week off really doing wonders to help him get a little back into his normal groove and out of the constant tension. As soon as Monday hit though, things started to take a turn for the worse. Charles was visibly getting tenser, and Max was starting to worry again over his boyfriend. So, when Charles was just walking around the living room again, seemingly in very deep thought, Max just grabbed his boyfriend’s hand and pulled him down onto the couch, where he held him nice and close. 

‘’You’re thinking again. Which makes me worried.’’ Max said, while Charles frowned a little in return, both at Max’s words and being interrupted in his thoughts. ‘’That’s a rude thing to say…’’ He told his boyfriend. Max laughed a little at that and just shook his head. ‘’Hush, babe. You know what I’m talking about.’’ He told the Monegasque. who just hummed softly. ‘’I just worry…’’ Charles finally admitted. ‘’What if people start saying that I screwed up in Spain because of us? Cause they will…’’

Max hummed softly and took Charles’ hand in his own, gently playing with the man’s fingers as they talked. ‘’Then they’re absolute fucking idiots.’’ He said and shrugged a little. ‘’It’s racing. Mistakes happen sometimes. But they won’t say it’s because you’d have a new girlfriend or whatever. So saying it’s because of us doesn’t make any sense either.’’ Charles sighed at that answer and shook his head. ‘’Maxy…you know that it’s different. We don’t race against girlfriends. But we do race each other…’’

‘’I know, babe.’’ Max said quietly. ‘’But it still doesn’t matter, does it? I know that you’re not driving any worse because of us. You know that. The teams know that. Then why does it matter if others think so?’’ He asked, humming softly. ‘’Because…’’ Charles started, sighing deeply as he shook his head. ‘’Because I don’t want people to hate me.’’ He finally admitted. Max knew very well how obsessed Charles could get with being liked. He really didn’t understand why, because…well fuck other people, but it seemed to always be a big deal to his boyfriend. And so it was important to Max as well that Charles was liked.

‘’Anything I can do to help then, Charlie?’’ Max asked as he gently caressed the back of his boyfriend’s hand. ‘’I’ll talk to people if you want. Post things on social media. Whatever I can do to make you feel better.’’ He assured the Monegasque, who gave Max a little smile. ‘’Thank you, Maxy.’’ He gave his boyfriend a kiss then and even let out a pleased sigh, feeling content just being with Max like this. ‘’We’ll just let it be for a while I guess. Hopefully it gets better with time.’’ He finally decided.

Their talk had helped Charles for the evening at least, and he managed to have a relaxed night in with his boyfriend, just lazily cuddling on the couch with him. For the rest of the time until they finally left for Belgium though, he was back in his head, unwilling to do anything but think and mope and read things on the internet. It was starting to consume him and Max really didn’t know what to do about it other than be there for Charles when he needed him. 

They finally left for Belgium on Wednesday and as always, Max was extremely busy with media duties there, it being the country where he was born after all. That left Charles mostly on his own for the entire weekend. A weekend that they already knew was going to be bad for Ferrari, given their engine issues throughout the season. Even Charles hadn’t expected just how bad it was going to get though. He qualified himself in P13, a full 1.7 seconds behind the Mercedes cars. It wasn’t even a question whether they would get lapped during the race, but just when.

That night, Charles was pretty much at his worst. It was the race commemorating Anthoine’s death a year before, and whereas he won that one in his honour, he was the absolute laughingstock of the field this time around. To make it worse, he just kept getting asked about the seatbelt-saga from Spain in relation to safety and Anthoine’s and Jules’ accidents, and it made Charles feel even guiltier about it. He just…he just wanted these feelings gone. To have the bad, sad thoughts leave his mind, but they just kept coming. Not even having Max around was helping. Not that night.

In the end, he only slept about 4 hours, finally falling asleep next to Max due to absolute exhaustion, after having been staring at the ceiling for hour after hour without a wink of sleep. His nerves that morning were extreme. He just had to show the world that he was still an amazing driver. He just had to. To shut everyone up about Max slowing him down and removing his edge. To prove that Ferrari was still an incredible team with incredible people. And most importantly, to honour all those that he had lost, especially Anthoine that day.

His nerves meant that he felt like throwing up about an hour before the race and looked like absolute hell. The pressure on his young shoulders was immense. When those familiar five lights went off though, he was absolutely flying, on pure racing instinct alone. He passed 4 cars on the first lap, but that was where his luck ended. His car had been bad in qualifying, but in the race, it was somehow even worse. They had no straight line speed whatsoever, and cars were overtaking them left and right. Charles finally found himself in 15th, behind a freaking Alfa Romeo and a Haas.

The team then decided to make an early pit stop, but that would probably get him in behind Hamilton, and a lap down on the race lead. They didn’t have any other options though, and so they went for it. Sadly though, even the pit stop went wrong for Charles. The wheel gun on the front left didn’t work, and so his stop took an extra 4 seconds to get going again. Which meant that when he exited the pits, Max was right on his tail. 

Fuck. Charles couldn’t believe this was happening. He won this race last year. He was the absolute best. He was fighting with the Mercedes cars, could’ve won the championship if his car had been that good from race 1 and now he was getting lapped by a Red Bull. He couldn’t just let Max passed though. People would talk. He had to stay in front just a moment. Just enough to show people that he wasn’t playing favourites on his boyfriend.

Max had other plans though. As soon as Charles got in front of him, he started cursing. That only intensified when his boyfriend didn’t immediately move over to let him past. Cursing some more, Max decided that there was no chance in hell he was losing his gap to Lewis. Not when he was this close to getting a win in his ‘home’ race. His extra momentum compared to Charles’ Ferrari meant that as they approached Eau Rouge, he managed to put his car just alongside Charles on the left-hand side. 

They approached the steep incline side by side, hitting it at pretty much the exact same time. They both turned in to the right, when Charles on his cold tires had the tiniest moment of oversteer. His correction and slight loss of momentum meant that Max was moving ahead just as Charles moved sideways, and made contact with Max’s right rear tyre. 

The hit meant that Max’s car immediately started to turn, causing Charles to hit him in the side as well. He immediately lost his front wing, and as Max went by, there really wasn’t anything else Charles could do. He slammed the brakes as hard as he possibly could, but still couldn’t stop the nose of his car from burying itself into the barrier. Fuck. Fuckfuckfuck. How could he be that FUCKING stupid?! Why? Fucking why?! He ruined everything. People would say the worst things now. How could he…why would he….FUCK.

After his team started asking if he was alright after the crash, Charles came back a little to himself. ‘’Yeah, I’m fine…’’ He finally answered. ‘’I’m sorry guys…that was stupid.’’ He said, before he disconnected and started to climb out of the car. Fuck. Max was going to be so angry with him, and rightfully so. As he climbed out of the car and onto the barrier, he turned around, and nearly had a heart attack. Max’s car had hit the tyre wall from the side, and the cockpit of the car was buried completely under them. What was worse, there wasn’t any movement to be seen at all.

Max’s heartbeat was going crazy as he and Charles approached Eau Rouge side by side. Yes he was lapping his boyfriend, but this is what he wanted. To race him, to fight him on track. It went almost in slow motion from Max’s view. As they both turned in to the corner, he could feel Charles making a strange move next to him. He knew the contact was coming before he even felt it, his body bracing itself already. The sound of screeching tyres filled his ears as the Red Bull was sent into a spin at 300 km/h. The last thing he remembered was another hit as Charles hit his side, before he headed sideways towards the tyre wall. After that, it went black.

Charles was in completely shock as he looked on. He just stood there, staring at the smoking Red Bull car, silently praying for movement, anything at all to let him know that Max was okay. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he could hear that people were yelling at him, but he didn’t fucking care. That was the man he loved in there and it was his fucking fault. Oh god. What if…what if. Charles almost choked on his own breathing and he could feel his knees giving out as he collapsed.

By then, marshals were running over to Max’s car and the medical car arrived shortly after. The session was immediately red flagged for the time being, and Charles almost had to fight off a couple of marshals before running over. ‘’Is he alright, where is he?!’’ He called out as he approached. Most of the tyres had been removed by the time Charles had gotten there, and he was held up by some more marshals as he tried to get in and see his boyfriend. ‘’SOMEONE TALK TO ME.’’ He called out, before his eyes went wide as he saw the ambulance approaching from the corner of his eyes. 

No. No. Please no. This wasn’t happening. This absolutely couldn’t be happening. As the doctor moved slightly to start getting Max out of the car, Charles finally saw his boyfriend. His visor was all the way open, but they hadn’t yet gotten to taking his helmet off yet. Still though, Charles couldn’t see those familiar blue eyes looking back at him, and all the air momentarily left his lungs. ‘’Is he…is he…?’’ He asked weakly, reaching a little for his boyfriend as if that was going to do anything. 

‘’He’s breathing.’’ Someone finally answered him. ‘’But we need to get him out of the car now, so please stand back and let us do our jobs.’’ Charles finally took a few steps back then, and almost collapsed again if it hadn’t been for the kind medical professional helping him to stand. ‘’Charles. You’ve been in a heavy crash too. We’ll take care of Max as best as we can but I need you to come to the medical center with us now.’’ She said. 

Charles just blinked a few times and shook his head. ‘’No...I-I’m fine. I need to stay with Max.’’ He protested. ‘’There’s nothing you can do for him right now. We’ll let you go to him as soon as we’ve done our checks on you.’’ She assured him, guiding him into the medical car. Charles just let himself be taken along at that point. As the medical car started to drive off, he could just see Max being taken out of the wreckage and onto the stretcher. ‘’Are they taking him to the hospital…?’’ He asked, to which the doctor that was with him nodded. ‘’Yes. You’ll be with him again soon enough, don’t you worry. They’re going to take great care of him.’’

Time just seemed to move by Charles from that point in, while he was lost in thoughts. People talked at him, asked him questions that he somewhat answered and did some tests on his physical fitness, but Charles wasn’t paying attention to any of that in the slightest. All of his thoughts were with Max. Whether he was okay, how hurt he was…whether he would ever forgive Charles for doing that to him. The thought alone forced Charles to swallow down the tears, taking deep breaths to try and keep himself composed.

Once he was finally declared unhurt, he was taken along again to his garage to change out of his overalls, before they finally took him to the hospital. The drive there alone seemed to take forever. It took about 50 minutes in total to get there from the track, but they were without a doubt the longest 50 minutes of Charles’ entire life. He still knew nothing. He didn’t know whether Max was even awake, let alone how bad his injuries would end up being. His phone was absolutely exploding with texts and calls, but he ignored every single one of them. There was only one person he wanted to hear from right then, and he was still unresponsive.

When they finally got to the hospital, Charles pretty much sprinted inside, before realizing that he had absolutely no idea where to go. One of the track’s medics had driven along with him, and they were quick to take him along to the intensive care unit of the hospital. It had been a couple of hours now, so now that the initial tests had been completed, Max had been moved to a separate room for observation.

When Charles finally got to his boyfriend’s hospital room, he felt like the breath got knocked out of his lungs all over again. What he saw was Max lying there, hooked up to all these wires and machines that were monitoring his vitals and oxygen levels and all these things that Charles had no idea about. He still seemed to be unconscious, and Charles could see the insane amount of bruises all over his bare torso. His eyes immediately started to tear up, and he could barely hold back a sob as he saw Max like this.

This was his fault. He had done this. And he would be the one to pay for it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Next time...well, you'll see.


	18. Broken

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...this chapter...I nearly cried twice while writing it, and it still hurts my heart, so I hope it turned out any good.
> 
> Thanks anyway for reading and please leave a comment if you can! I love to know what you think!

Charles just stood there, staring at Max for what felt like an eternity. He could feel the tears running down his cheeks as he watched his boyfriend in this state, but other than that, everything felt numb. He still didn’t feel anything from his own crash, even though he should barely able to walk now that the adrenaline had faded. He had to gather all the courage left in his body, but he finally opened the door and walked inside, letting out a choked sob when it fell closed behind him. ‘’Fuck…Maxy.’’ He said quietly. He let himself fall into the chair next to his boyfriend and just started to cry, his face buried in his hands as he let it all out. 

He felt so terrible. So fucking guilty for being the one that had done this to the man he loved. Max would never forgive him for doing this to him and he had every right to. Charles would be alone again. All alone. Max would hate him, everyone in the paddock would hate him for being so irresponsible, the press would hate him and vilify him until his career was ruined. Why was he such an irresponsible idiot? He should’ve just let Max past immediately, then nothing like this would have happened.

When he finally felt a hand on his shoulder, he nearly jumped off of his seat in shock. ‘’Excuse me, monsieur Leclerc.’’ A voice said in French. When Charles was finally able to turn his gaze away from Max long enough to look, he saw a friendly looking doctor, wearing a mask. He offered Charles one as well and waited for the Monegasque to put it on, before he started to speak again.

‘’Would you please step out with me for a second?’’ The doctor asked Charles. ‘’I’d like to speak with you for a moment on his condition.’’ Charles was finally able to form any thoughts again other than guilt and regret now that someone was talking to him, but they were filled with nothing but worry as he stepped out of the room with the doctor, immediately launching into questions as the door closed. ‘’Is…is he okay? Is it bad? Will he…will he survive?’’ He asked, his voice getting quieter and weaker the longer he went on. The doctor nodded in return. ‘’I can’t say that he’s fine, but he doesn’t have any life threatening injuries.’’ He told Charles, who nearly started to cry again then in relief. He wiped away the tears that remained on his cheeks then and took a deep breath. 

‘’Is….what are his injuries? Is he going to wake up?’’ He asked the doctor. ‘’Well, we haven’t been able to check everything yet.’’ The doctor told Charles as he glanced through the window towards Max. ‘’We had to focus on any critical injuries first, the rest will be done later. It thankfully seems like he doesn’t have any head injuries, that’s most important. They told me he was awake for a time in the ambulance, but given in how much pain he was, we put him back to sleep for the time being.’’

Charles felt incredibly relieved when it turned out Max at least didn’t have any life threatening or head injuries. Those had been his first worries, and a little weight fell of his shoulders right then. However, the doctor continued. ‘’His body seems to be in worse shape though. He has at the very least 4 broken ribs, a bruised lung and a fracture in his shoulder from the impact. There was some slight internal bleeding visible on the scan as well, but thankfully nothing that needed to be treated right away. We need to take a closer look at his right wrist and hand as well, but we suspect some injuries there too.’’ Charles swallowed thickly as he listened to the doctor and finally closed his eyes for a second as he processed it.

‘’Does…Will…When can he race again?’’ Charles finally asked, to which the doctor sighed a little. ‘’I couldn’t tell you. Given the injuries that we’ve seen so far, it’ll at least be weeks before he’s healed and months until he’ll be back at the level needed to perform high level sports.’’ Charles’ heart sank at those words, and he had to hold on to the railing on the wall to keep himself from collapsing. ‘’Months…?’’ He asked quietly. ‘’I…fuck…’’

At this point, Charles was looking a combination of incredibly exhausted & pale as a ghost, and the doctor started to worry a little for him, too. ‘’You should probably sit down for a moment. You’re not looking too well.’’ He said, calling a nurse over. ‘’Could you please get monsieur Leclerc here something to eat and drink? I fear he’s about to collapse…’’ He told the nurse, who quickly walked off to get him something.

‘’When she comes back, you can just go back inside and spend some more time with Max. I’m sure he’ll want to see you when he wakes up.’’ The doctor told Charles, who nodded a little in return. ‘’I…yeah, okay. Thank you, doctor.’’ He told the man. ‘’Of course.’’ He replied. He waited for the nurse to come back, before he excused himself, and headed back to work.

The nurse returned to Charles with some fruit juice and a chocolate bar. ‘’Eat and drink this.’’ She told him. ‘’It’ll help raise your blood sugar a little and you’ll feel better after.’’ She then saw the way he was looking at Max before heading in and put her hand on his arm for a moment. ‘’He’ll be okay. He’s in good care here, I promise you.’’ 

Charles gave her a little nod and a weak smile that didn’t really come through with the mask on. ‘’Thank you.’’ He told her, before he went back in. He moved the chair from the side of the room to the side of Max’s bed and sat down again with hm, drinking his juice in one go before he just looked back at his boyfriend. He put the chocolate aside for the time being and instead took Max’s hand in his own ever so carefully. 

‘’Maxy…’’ He said, his voice barely above a whisper. ‘’I’m so, so, so sorry. And I know that you’ll never forgive me for doing this to you, but…I-I love you so much. I don’t know what I’ll do when you wake up and you hate me.’’ He swallowed thickly and blinked a few times to try and keep the tears away this time. ‘’I just hope that despite what I did, you’ll still love me, too…’’

He spent the next hour or so just sitting there, gently holding Max’s hand in his own as he caressed the skin and watched over him as he slept and healed. His eyes kept roaming over his boyfriend’s exposed torso, fixating on all the visible injuries and bruises and just wondering how much worse it was underneath the surface. A few other people had come by since then. Christian and some other guys from Red Bull had been over, but they hadn’t come into the room and Charles wasn’t about to go and speak with them. He was feeling terrible enough already.

It wasn’t long though, before Max’s mom finally arrived. Charles could see her before she came in. She was talking to a doctor as she looked inside, same as he had done. She finally entered the room and walked over, putting a hand on her son’s cheek as she leaned down and pressed a kiss to his forehead. ‘’You’ll be alright, sweetheart. I know you will.’’ She said quietly. She swallowed thickly then and slowly pulled away, finally looking at her son’s boyfriend.

‘’Hi, Charles.’’ She said quietly. She gave the Monegasque the tiniest of smiles, but it was clear that this was very hard on her as well. ‘’Can I…please…?’’ She asked, gesturing to his seat. She just wanted to be close to her son and Max’s other side was filled with machinery. Charles nodded quickly and put Max’s hand back down on the bed, before he got up. ‘’I…’’ He said, wanting to say something, but being at an absolute loss for words. There were so many things he wanted to tell Sophie, but he finally settled on a quiet ‘’I’m so sorry…’’ his voice breaking halfway through as the tears started to roll down his cheeks again. 

‘’I-I didn’t mean to cause this. I never wanted to hurt him. I…I…-’’ He was interrupted by Sophie’s arms wrapping around him and taking him up into a hug. ‘’Shhhhh, Charles.’’ She told him, gently rubbing his back a little. ‘’It wasn’t your fault. It’s racing. It’s….it’s terrible what happened, but…our Max is strong, he’ll pull through. I know he will.’’ She told Charles, who just completely fell apart at that point.

For the past hours, he had convinced himself that he was the absolute worst person on earth. He had…he had even started telling himself that maybe it hadn’t been an accident. Maybe he had somehow done it on purpose. Maybe some subconscious part of him was jealous of Max beating him, being on the podium time and time again when Charles had to fight for points. So when Sophie just…forgave him for hurting his son like this, it was too much to handle. He sobbed into her shoulder as he was held, all of the tension leaving his body in those tears. 

It was minutes until the tears finally stopped coming. Charles slowly pulled away and wiped at his eyes before letting out a humourless laugh at himself for falling apart like that. ‘’I-I’m sorry, I don’t know wha-‘’ He started, before Sophie interrupted him again with a kind smile. ‘’It’s okay, Charles. I understand how hard this must be on you.’’ He said and rubbed his shoulder for a moment. ‘’Why don’t you go and get a breath of fresh air? I’ll stay here by Max’s side and I’ll call you if anything happens.’’

Charles finally agreed after thinking it over for a moment, nodding in return. He left the room then and found the nearest bathroom, where he splashed his face with cold water a few times. He took a few deep breaths and after putting himself somewhat back together, walked outside to get some fresh air. He hadn’t even set one foot outside though, before he was bombarded with an insane amount of camera flashes and questions being shouted at him. ‘Charles, just how bad is Max doing?!’ ‘Are you still together after your crash?!’ ‘Did you mean to take Max out as revenge for breaking up with you?’

Dazed from the light, he shook his head and stumbled back inside, rubbing at his eyes a little as he frowned. Did he hear that right? Breaking up with him? His chest suddenly started to feel tight and he could almost hear his heart beating in his ears. He walked back towards Max’s hospital room and called Lando on the way there. He’d know. Max would’ve told him if anything was wrong. He’d be able to clear this whole thing up.

Lando picked up on just the second ring, apparently eager to talk to Charles, too. ‘’Hey, Charlie. How is he doing?’’ He asked immediately. ‘’Hey, Lando. He’s…okay. They put him to sleep and they tell me he has some fractures, but they’re going to do more tests in the morning when he wakes up.’’ Charles answered, before he sighed softly. ‘’Hey…can I ask you something…? About Max…?’’

Lando cursed a little under his breath at Max’s apparent injuries, but hummed in return. ‘’Yeah, shoot.’’ He told Charles, who had to pause for a second before continuing. ‘’So…I just went out for some air and there is an army of journalists out there. And they asked me all these questions, one of which was about Max breaking up with me…Do you know anything about that?’’ He asked quietly, to which Lando just started laughing.

‘’You’ve got to be kidding me, Charlie.’’ The Brit replied as he almost audibly shook his head on Charles. ‘’You are so freaking ridiculous. Max ADORES you. And to be honest I think he’d even be insulted by the rumour and you thinking that it might somehow be true. No he’s not going to break up with you, compared to that he’s even a lot closer to popping the question. He fucking loves you, Charlie. And I’m not trying to be rude here, but you’re being an overreacting idiot right now.’’

Charles smiled a little at the insult and couldn’t help the small chuckle coming out of him. ‘’Yeah…okay.’’ He finally said. ‘’I just…with everything that’s happened and me doing this to Max and him probably being angry with me when he wakes up I just thought…’’ He said, before Lando interrupted him. ‘’No, you’re weren’t thinking, Charles. Cause if you were, you’d know it was a stupid thought.’’ He told him. ‘’Now, as much as I appreciate getting the update, shouldn’t you be somewhere by someone’s side rather than talking to me…?’’

Charles nodded softly and smiled a tiny smile. ‘’Yeah, okay. Thanks Lando. This helped a lot.’’ He told his friend. ‘’You’re welcome, Charlie. Keep me updated.’’ Lando replied, before they ended the call. Charles then headed back to Max’s room and walked back inside. He gave Sophie a small smile when she looked at him, and finally sank down against the wall of the room, watching his boyfriend and his mother.

He sat there for what felt like ages, before his eyelids started getting heavy. The lack of sleep from the night before and the entire day that happened were finally catching up with him, and he couldn’t keep himself from falling asleep, even in this uncomfortable position. When he woke up again, it was nearly dark. It had clearly been a couple of hours, and the hospital had switched to night mode. When Charles moved, he could feel the soft blanket that he had been covered with. With a soft smile, he moved it off of him, and slowly got up, groaning a little at the ache in his entire body. God, he was in a lot worse shape after the crash than he’d originally thought. 

He saw that Sophie wasn’t in her chair anymore, so he sat down there himself by his boyfriend’s side. Max was still in the same position and sound asleep, so Charles took a quick moment to check his phone, while using his other hand to gently hold Max’s again. He saw he had a text from Sophie, telling him that she had left for the night to inform family members and other people close to Max about his condition, and would be back first thing in the morning. 

He texted her back and thanked her for the blanket, then spent a little time answering other texts from his own friends and family who were worried about him and Max after seeing the crash on tv. It was only a few minutes later, when Charles felt a soft squeeze in his hand. He gasped loudly when he felt it, nearly dropping his phone onto the floor. He let it fall onto the bed anyway, and used that hand to hold Max’s hand as well.

When he finally dared to look up at Max’s face, he saw two very familiar blue eyes staring back at him, and Charles broke all over again. His eyes welled up with tears, and he sniffled a little before letting out a relieved huff of breath. ‘’H-hi Maxy…’’ He said quietly, trembling slightly as he leaned down and kissed his boyfriend’s hand. 

Max gave Charles’ hand another soft squeeze after receiving the little kiss. He felt like his entire body was broken, but seeing Charles by his side, the man he loved so much, did wonders to make him feel better. He managed a weak, little smile, and swallowed thickly before he was finally able to speak. ‘’Hey, Charlie.’’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, poor baby Charles. I feel so bad for hurting him :(


	19. Awakening

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Max is awake! Yaaaaaaay! But very hurt :(  
> I love you all for reading and I'm sorry for hurting you with the last 2 chapters. Hopefully this makes it a little better? Somehow?

“Hey, Charlie.” Max said, his voice sounding broken and raspy. He was clearly in a lot of pain, and it visibly cost him strength to push the air out of his lungs to form the words. Nonetheless, they were the most amazing two words Charles had ever heard in his life. He let out a slightly broken sigh of relief and wiped the tears out of his eyes as he got up, not wanting Max to have to strain and look to the side to see him.

“You…you’re awake.” He said quietly, resisting an incredibly strong urge to just hug his boyfriend tightly. Max was awake. He was actually awake and talking and Charles had this insane mixture of guilt and relief and happiness in his stomach that he didn’t know what to do with. “Did I die and go to heaven?” Max asked quietly. Charles frowned deeply at the absurdity of the question and quickly shook his head. “N-no…you didn’t die. You’re here, Maxy. With me.” He said quietly, the question confusing him immensely.

Max managed to make an amused little sound in return and gave Charles the sweetest smile that he could under the circumstances, which wasn’t terribly convincing. “Then why do I have an angel watching over me?” Charles looked at Max in complete and utter disbelief for a second, before he just burst out laughing. God, his boyfriend really was the stupidest, most idiotic, loveliest, sweetest, most romantic boyfriend in the world. It was insane to Charles that even when Max was in his current state, he still wanted to make him laugh and stop his tears. “You….are so dumb.” Charles finally said as he kept chuckling. “And I love you so, so much Maxy.” He added quietly, leaning down and pressing the gentlest of kisses to the Dutchman’s lips. 

The kiss raised Max’s heartbeat enough that it triggered something, and a nurse came running over a few seconds later before Max could answer his boyfriend. She smiled brightly when she saw that Max was awake and used her pager to request that the doctor come over, too. “Hi there, Max.” She said as she walked over. “How are you feeling?” She asked as she stepped to the machines monitoring him and started to write down some things and numbers that neither Charles nor Max had any clue as to the meaning of.

Max closed his eyes for a second then and seemed to try and move every part of his body to see what hurt the most, which turned out to be a very bad idea. As soon as he moved his shoulder the tiniest bit, he let out a loud groan of pain, and both Charles and the nurse looked incredibly worried. ‘’Like I’ve been hit by a barrier while going 250 kilometres an hour…’’ He finally managed to say, the painful frown still present on his face. “Try not to move.” The nurse told him gently. “You have some bad fractures that we need to take care of in the morning. For now, I can give you some more painkillers if you need them?”

Max nodded the slightest bit at that and tried to stay as still as he could afterwards. “Yes please…” He told her. “But they do make my head feel funny.” He reached for Charles’ hand then, and held on tight once he found it. That explained his need to make dumb jokes at least. “You’ll stay here, right Charlie?” He asked his boyfriend quietly. As Charles looked at Max, he saw the polar opposite of what he had originally expected. He didn’t see his strong, proud Max, angry with him for being so stupid and making him end up in the hospital. All he saw was his sweet boyfriend, in pain and scared, needing Charles to help him through this for once instead of the other way around. And Charles would make sure he’d always be there, as long as Max would have him.

‘’O-of course I will, Maxy. I will stay by your side for as long as you want me to. I promise.’’ Charles answered honestly. He watched as the nurse increased his medication a little, before he leaned down again and pressed another soft kiss to his boyfriend’s lips. ‘’Mmmm, kisses help more than painkillers…’’ Max mumbled against Charles’ lips, making the nurse giggle a little. ‘’Sounds like they’re working.’’ She told Charles, before she stepped back a little from the bed and handed the doctor Max’s chart as he entered the room.

It was the same doctor as Charles had spoken to before, and Charles was quick to sit back down and put his mask back on when the doctor came in. He didn’t want to be rude and take up too much of the man’s time by distracting Max with kisses. ‘’So, mr. Verstappen. How are we feeling? Are you able to breathe alright?’’ He inquired as he checked the information from the machines the nurse had written down.

Max gave a little nod, then shut his eyes in pain for a movement when that hurt. ‘’Yeah…’’ He said finally. ‘’I can breathe, but everything hurts like hell.’’ He told the doctor. ‘’How bad is i-‘’ He started to ask, before he was halted by a coughing fit. As he couched, the nurse shot into action, helping Max to sit up slightly more and holding some tissues in front of his mouth. When it passed and the nurse helped Max to gently lie back down without too much pain, Charles was absolutely horrified to see the tissues Max had coughed on were covered with spatters of blood.

He made a little scared noise as he saw it and glanced back over at the doctor. ‘’Is…what…that’s blood.’’ He told the man, who nodded softly in return. ‘’Don’t worry. It’s nothing great, but it’s also nothing to worry too much about. As I told you, the impact bruised his lung, so some blood is to be expected. It’ll clear up in a day or two.’’ He told Charles, who sank back into his chair with a relieved sigh. 

The doctor then turned back to Max, looking a little more serious. ‘’I’ll be straight with you.’’ He told the Dutchman. ‘’Your injuries are pretty severe. Broken ribs, a bruised lung, fractures in your shoulder and wrist and after checking the original scans again we want to take another look at your hip as well. All in all, I think you’ve been very lucky after that crash. It could’ve been a lot worse.’’

Max winced visibly as the doctor named his list of injuries, and he couldn’t help but glance over at Charles when the man mentioned the crash. Charles however, did not meet Max’s gaze. He only looked paler when it was mentioned, and the thought of talking about it with his boyfriend terrified him more than anything else in the world. Max however, had other plans. ‘’Charlie?’’ He asked, reaching for and taking the Monegasque’s hand once more. ‘’What about you? Did you get hurt in the crash?’’ He asked.

Max remembered….flashes of memories. He remembered going side by side with Charles. He remembered that he went into a spin and then…pain, before it went completely black. Really then, he was just worried about Charles. He had to have crashed as well and Max wanted to be completely sure that his boyfriend wasn’t hurt. He had already had such a tough couple of weeks that Max would do anything to save him from more pain. Charles just shook his head at that and gave Max’s hand a tiny little squeeze. ‘’I’m not hurt, Maxy.’’ He finally said quietly. ‘’I’m fine. You…you just worry about yourself, okay?’’ 

Max finally nodded and turned his gaze back towards the doctor, who continued. ‘’So, when you came in we did a number of tests and scans and we thankfully found nothing that required immediate treatment or surgery. So we’ll let you rest for now and get a little strength back, and we’ll continue in the morning.’’ He looked at Charles then and hummed softly. ‘’It’s…after visiting hours, but given the circumstances we will let monsieur Leclerc stay with you for the night.’’

Max had started to tense up at the beginning of the doctor’s last sentence, but let out a relieved sigh when it turned out that Charles could stay with him. He really didn’t want to spend the night in the hospital all by himself. Not while he was in this much pain and unsure of the outcome of all this. ‘’Thank you.’’ He told the doctor, giving him a small smile. ‘’Well,’’ The doctor continued. ‘’We’ll get you something to eat and drink and I will see you again in the morning.’’ He told Max, giving him a nod before he left the room.

The nurse waited for the doctor to leave, before she looked at Max with a soft hum. ‘’What would you like to eat? You probably shouldn’t have anything too heavy, it’ll give you trouble. Do you think you could manage eating some soup?’’ She suggested, to which Max nodded. ‘’Yeah, that’s fine. Charles can help me, too.’’ He said and gave his boyfriend a look. ‘’Right, babe?’’ he asked, making Charles chuckle a little. ‘’Yeah, I’ll help.’’ He agreed. He didn’t mind feeding Max in the slightest. It’d be cute. He had sat back down by then, and was very gently brushing Max’s hair with his fingers as he looked down at his boyfriend. 

‘’You have no idea how relieved I am that you’re awake, Maxy.’’ Charles said quietly, biting his lip a little to keep himself from getting emotional again. Max had watched the nurse leave the room, but shifted his gaze to Charles when the man started talking, looking up into his eyes. He hummed softly in return then, blinking a few times as he tried to get rid of the haze that seemed to cover his thinking. ‘’Can I get some more kisses?’’ He finally asked. ‘’I wasn’t joking when I said they helped.’’

Charles just shook his head on his incredibly stupid boyfriend and removed his mask before he leaned back over to give him a few sweet, gentle kisses. ‘’I love you, Maxy.’’ He said quietly. ‘’And…fuck. I’m so fucking sorry for doing this to you…’’ He added, sucking in a deep breath and closing his eyes for a second again, the sight of all Max’s injuries overwhelming him a little. At the same time, Max just frowned up at Charles, staring at him until the latter opened his eyes again. 

‘’Charles…no. Don’t say things like that.’’ He told his boyfriend, his tone a little more forceful than it had been so far. ‘’You didn’t mean to hurt me, right?’’ He asked, to which Charles was quick to shake his head. ‘’N-No…I never ever want to hurt you, Maxy.’’ He told his boyfriend. Max nodded softly in response and gently caressed Charles’ hand once he found it. ‘’So it’s not your fault then, is it? Because accidents happen.’’

Charles listened to Max, and he really was making a good point, but Charles just couldn’t get that little voice in his mind to shut the hell up. ‘’But if I had just gone out of the way, this wouldn’t have happened…’’ He argued. ‘’If I would’ve just let you by, you would’ve won and you would’ve been amazing and because of me you’re in here and I’m the worst fucking boyfriend in the world and I totally get it if you hate me now and want to break up with me and never want to see me again for doing this to you.’’ 

Charles was just an absolute waterfall of guilt and regret and insecurity and really it was just too much for Max to handle in his current state. He was still tired. He was so, so tired and he really just needed Charles to be there for him, rather than it being the other way around like it had been for the past weeks. ‘’Charlie…please…’’ Max begged. ‘’Don’t….Don’t do this to yourself. Don’t do this to us. I’m not angry with you. Please, please don’t be angry with yourself either. I need you.’’ 

Charles let out a long, slightly shaky sigh and shook his head. ‘’I’m sorry…’’ He said quietly. He swallowed thickly and bit down on his lip again as he looked at Max. ‘’I just….look at you, Maxy. I can’t get it out of my head that I’m responsible for this. That it’s my fault that you’re here.’’ He told his boyfriend, who squeezed Charles’ hand again. ‘’Listen to me.’’ Max said. ‘’We’re going to get through this together, but we can only do it if you’re strong. I…I can’t be there for you right now like I want to be, but I really need you with me in this, okay? I’m scared, Charles.’’ 

Those last words really landed with Charles and he finally looked back up into Max eyes. He could see it. He hadn’t wanted to, because he was so convinced Max should’ve been angry with him, but that wasn’t there. He just looked frightened and desperate. Charles nodded softly then. His own feelings could and should wait, at least for now. He needed to be there for his boyfriend and he would let absolutely nothing stop him from doing so.

‘’Okay, Maxy.’’ He finally said. He took Max’s hand in both of his own and placed another kiss on it, before he just smiled at his boyfriend. ‘’I will be there for you. I promise.’’ He assured him. ‘’You don’t have to be scared.’’ It still felt wrong to Charles, that he would be the one to take care of him despite being the one that had put him there in the first place. But they would deal with that later.

‘’Thank you, Charles.’’ Max said quietly. He showed his first real sign of emotion then as he let out a shaky breath and stared at the ceiling for a moment. ‘’I…I remember waking up in the ambulance.’’ He said after a minute of silence. ‘’I was so scared, in so much pain. But…I remember only thinking of you. Hoping that you were okay.’’ He continued, his voice getting quiet as he spoke, until it ended barely above a whisper. ‘’You mean the world to me Charlie, and it breaks my heart when you think things like that.’’

Charles’ eyes teared up again as Max spoke and he had to wipe at them to keep himself from crying again. ‘’I love you so much.’’ He finally told his boyfriend, unsure of what to say to him other than that. ‘’They had to physically take me away from your car. I wanted to dig you out of there myself.’’ He said and let out a small laugh. ‘’You should see my bruises, but I didn’t even feel them. I just wanted to know my Maxy was still there.’’

Max gave Charles a small smile then and was about to continue when the nurse returned with his soup. He thanked her for it, and when he found he couldn’t actually eat it by himself, blushed as he asked Charles to help him. ‘’Of course, babe.’’ The Monegasque replied quickly, and slowly and patiently fed Max his soup. He cleaned up after they finished, after which Charles say back down in his chair.

He let out a big yawn then and couldn’t help a little rub at his eyes. He glanced at the clock, which read 03:49 in the morning and groaned a little, realizing how little he had slept in the past two days. ‘’I’d ask you to come and lay here with me, but I can’t really move…’’ Max said and sighed deeply, making Charles chuckle. ‘’That’s okay.’’ He told Max. He got the blanket he had slept on earlier and used another chair to be able to at least put his feet up. 

He leaned over then and gave Max another kiss, before finally getting as comfortable as he could possibly get on those chairs. ‘’We should both have some rest. Just…be sure to wake me up if you need anything, okay? Anything at all.’’ Max nodded a little and just laid there for a little longer, watching Charles fall asleep next to him. He was still scared, but it was just that little bit better, knowing he had the man he loved by his side.


	20. The Road Ahead

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So we're still in the hospital, figuring out how both Max and Charles are dealing with all this and the long road ahead. More plot development soon :D

It really didn’t take that long after Charles fell asleep for Max to join him. He was still extremely tired too, and his body needed the sleep to heal properly. Charles only woke back up again when the early morning sun shining through the window hit his face, and he groaned softly as he opened his eyes. God, his body just felt broken. He had had bad muscle aches before, but he was about 80% sure that if he tried to stand he’d just collapse instantly. He rubbed the back of his neck a little at he stretched, feeling some things pop back into place.

He found he had a bit of a headache too, so he was pleased with himself for bringing his glasses with him. He put them on and finally looked at Max then, who was still sound asleep. Or at least, he seemed to be. The insistent beeping of the heart monitor told Charles that Max’s heart rate was a lot higher than it normally was while resting, and the frown on his face showed that was probably having a not so great dream. Weirdly, Max’s heart rate kept climbing, topping 100…110…120. The Dutchman was now moving around a little, his fingers almost seeming to grasp something before his eyes shot open with a loud gasp.

His free hand instantly flew to feel at his chest, and Max was breathing very quickly as he awoke from his nightmare. Charles knew his reflexes were good, but even he didn’t know they were this amazing. Before he even knew it, he was next to Max, holding his hand and gently brushing his hair as he shushed him. “Shhh, Maxy. It’s okay. You’re safe. I’m right here.” He said quietly, leaning down to press a kiss to his boyfriend’s forehead.

He could hear both Max’s breathing and his heart slowly return back to normal, and found that the man was still trembling slightly from the shock. “Are you okay, babe?” Charles asked, bending through his knees a little so he could look Max right in the eye. The Dutchman finally nodded softly and looked back at Charles, although he still didn’t smile. “I think so…” Max finally said. “I…fuck…I was…we were…” He stammered. The terrified look in Max’s eyes told Charles enough, and so he just kissed the man gently. “But you’re not there anymore, Maxy.” He told his boyfriend. “You’re here with me, and I’m taking care of you.” 

Max calmed himself down again by taking deep breaths, but it just didn’t feel like enough that Charles was holding his hand. He needed more than that. So he summoned absolutely all the strength that he had left in his broken body to move away from Charles. He groaned loudly in pain as he did, but he finally managed to create a spot on the bed just big enough for Charles to fit on his side. He glanced down at it before looking back at his boyfriend and pouted a little at him. “Please…?” He asked quietly, making Charles grown softly.

“Maxy…” Charles replied, letting out a long and deep sigh. “You know I want nothing more than to lie down with you, but I don’t want to accidentally hurt you…” He told his boyfriend, who only pouted more. “Please, Charlie? It’s my good side and I’m the patient and you promised you’d be by my side. So I’m taking it literally.” Charles finally sighed again and gave in, unable to say no to Max for too long. He very slowly and carefully got onto the bed next to Max, his aching body almost giving a sigh of relief as he laid down. He finally put his head down next to the Dutchman and smiled at him, giving him a small kiss on his cheek. “Happy now?” 

Max hummed softly and moved his head, resting it against Charles’ shoulder, before he nodded. “So happy.” He said quietly, letting out a pleased sigh. Charles couldn’t help but smile fondly and gently put his hand down on Max’s abs, caressing the skin that wasn’t bruised. “How are you feeling, Maxy?” He asked quietly, making the other man sigh. “It hurts.” He told Charles. “It still all fucking hurts like hell.” He sighed again and shook his head. “I just keep holding on to the fact that it should all go away eventually.”

Charles sighed a little at that answer and placed a kiss on Max’s head. “I’ll help you in any way I can.” He assured his boyfriend, who smiled. “For now I just really want you to hold my hand and stay by my side like this.” He told Charles. His eyes slowly fell closed again then and before Charles knew it, Max was asleep again, this time seemingly a lot more relaxed against his boyfriend’s side.

Charles watched him sleep for a while. He was gently running his fingers over Max’s exposed, unbruised skin as they laid there together, and it seemingly helped to keep the Dutchman a little more relaxed as he rested. Still though, every single time Charles’ eyes drifted to bruised, dark purple skin on Max’s body, a shot of guilt went through his entire body. He had promised Max he’d be strong for him, but really, Charles wanted to just run away. 

He didn’t want to be a bother for Max anymore, someone that he had to look after day after day and even more than that, he wanted to make sure that he could never possibly again hurt the man he loved so much. He considered it for a moment, thought about leaving this all behind, when he was brought back to the present as the door to the room opened and Max’s mom walked back in.

Charles immediately blushed, because he should absolutely 100% not be on the bed with Max, but he couldn’t really move either, since Max was holding his arm and had cuddled against his side as much as he possibly could. Sophie didn’t seem to be judging him in the slightest though. She took one long look at her son, before she just sighed happily. “He wanted you to lie down with him?” She asked with a fond smile. “He always used to ask me that when he was scared.”

Charles finally nodded softly at the question and made sure to keep his voice hushed so he wouldn’t wake Max back up. ‘’Did they tell you about him waking up in the night?’’ He asked Sophie, who nodded in response. ‘’Yes. And they also told me that he only had eyes and worry for you despite his own pain.’’ She added with a little chuckle. She moved the chair around a little so that she wouldn’t have to look at Charles’ back while they spoke and sat down, looking at her son with a loving smile. ‘’He’s so head over heels for you.’’ She told the Monegasque. 

‘’I know…’’ Charles said quietly, placing another soft kiss on Max’s head. Part him wanted to start arguing again then, telling Sophie that Max should be hating him for injuring him and hurting his career in this way, but he had promised Max he wouldn’t, and so he didn’t. Instead, he just smiled down at his boyfriend as he answered. ‘’I love him, too. More than anything.’’ 

Sophie nodded softly and took a picture of the pair of them together. It could always be useful someday. ‘’They told me he was in a lot of pain, but he could talk alright?’’ She asked, wanting to verify the information with Charles. ‘’Yeah. It took him some effort to speak at first, but it got better as we went on.’’ He replied, then hummed softly as Max started to stir again against his side. The Dutchman started waking up soon after, and blinked a few times before his eyes could focus on the image.

He broke into a smile when he saw who had joined them and used his good hand to rub his eyes. He let out a yawn then and snuggled just that little bit more into Charles’ hoodie, before he looked over at his mother. ‘’Hey, mama.’’ He said quietly, greeting her. Max and Sophie continued their conversation in Dutch then, leaving Charles as the awkward third wheel. He had heard Max talk enough Dutch to figure out that his mother was asking after his health and he heard his own name mentioned a few times, along with adoring looks from Max, but that was all he could really make out.

The two of them spoke for a little while, before Max squeezed Charles’ hand to get his attention. ‘’Charlie, could you maybe please get us something to eat? I’m starving.’’ He finally asked of his boyfriend, who nodded quickly. Charles hadn’t really realized it until then, but he hadn’t eaten anything at all since before the race, and his stomach was getting quite upset with him. ‘’Yeah, yeah. I’ll get us something.’’ He told Max, giving his boyfriend a kiss before he got up from the bed. ‘’Would you…?’’ He asked Sophie, who shook her head. ‘’I’m fine Charles, thank you.’’

Charles left the room then and went on his way to the nurses’ station. He requested some breakfast for Max, informing them that he had woken up, before he went on his way again to score some breakfast for himself. After having to search for way too long in the absolute maze of a building, he found himself in the hospital’s cafeteria, where he bought a couple of croissants and some fruit juice, before he finally headed back and ate on the way.

He made his way all the way back to Max’s hospital room, and frowned deeply as he glanced through the window. It was…empty. Was he…He wasn’t going insane, right? There had to be a perfectly reasonable explanation for this. He was probably just on the wrong floor. He checked the number of the room again, and found that this was definitely the right one. Finally, a nurse approached the incredibly lost looking man, and informed him that Max had been taken away to have some more scans done. He’d be back in about an hour or so. 

Fuck. Charles couldn’t even fucking stay by his boyfriend’s side right. All he had to do was stay there, right fucking there, and be there for Max when and if he got scared or was in pain or just about anything that he could possible need Charles for. And because he had managed to get lost in a hospital, he wasn’t there. 

Charles went back into Max’s room, and decided that really, the only thing he could do was wait. It wasn’t like he could just start strolling through the hospital, because that was weird and disruptive, and he didn’t want to go outside, because there were reporters. Besides, he had an obligation to wait right there for Max to come back, and to be there for him once he finally did. God, he was so stupid for taking so long to get back from his breakfast run. 

He sat there for what felt like absolute ages, before he finally got a text from Pierre, asking him if he could call him. Given that he had nothing else to do with Max still gone for scans and he could really use a good talk with his friend, he instantly did. ‘’Hey, Pierre.’’ He said as soon as he heard the Frenchman answer the call. ‘’Heeeey, Charles.’’ Pierre answered, the relaxed tone of Charles’ voice taking away a lot of his worries.

‘’How are you guys doing then?’’ Pierre asked curiously, making Charles sigh deeply. ‘’Not great.’’ He admitted. ‘’Max is pretty hurt. Broken ribs, fractures everywhere, a bruised lung. He looks fucking broken, Pierre.’’ Charles said, wincing even as he said it. ‘’And it’s my fault. And Max keeps telling me that it isn’t and that it was an accident but I KNOW that it is. It might not have been on purpose, but it’s still my fault because if it weren’t for me it would’ve have happened at all.’’ 

Pierre sighed softly in return, both at the list of Max’s injuries and Charles’ just general existential dread. ‘’Charles, you’re being….well you, again.’’ He told his friend. ‘’How about that if Max doesn’t think it’s your fault, and I don’t think it’s your fault, and whoever you ask about F1 who knows their stuff doesn’t think it’s your fault, that you start to consider the fact that maybe every single person in the world that isn’t you might be right?’’ He asked, humming softly as he waited for Charles to consider that answer.

‘’They weren’t in the car with me though…’’ Charles finally said, making Pierre groan. ‘’You are so lucky that I love you too much to do so, because I really want to slap you in the face for being an idiot.’’ He told the Monegasque, shaking his head. ‘’You do realize that really you just have to take care of Max for the coming time, right? Put Charles second and your boyfriend first. He’ll need you.’’ Charles was quick to answer, not leaving any doubt. ‘’Of course! I…we already talked about it and I told him I would try and not think about it and just be there for him when he needed me.’’ He said and sighed deeply. 

‘’But then I went to get breakfast and got lost in this place and by the time I got back they had already taken him away to get more scans.’’ Charles told Pierre sadly. ‘’I’m already failing at this, Pierre.’’ He told his friend, who chuckled a little. ‘’It’s scans, Charles. You can’t be in the room anyway. I’m talking about once he’s out of the hospital. That part will be way more important, because then the long road to recovery finally starts. That’s where he’ll need you.’’ Pierre cleared his throat a little then, and bit his lip for a moment. 

‘’Speaking of the long road ahead…Helmut called me this morning to tell me I have Max’s car for the rest of the season…’’ Pierre informed Charles, who hummed softly. It was a little difficult for Charles to figure out how to respond. On the one hand, he was really happy for Pierre. He deserved everything that he could possibly get, and Charles wished the world for him. The circumstances however…made it less than ideal. He finally settled on trying to be happy for his friend. ‘’Congratulations, Pierre. I’m sure you’ll do amazing in that car.’’ He told his friend with a small smile.

They spoke for a little while longer, and finally ended the call when Charles saw Max being brought back to the room. He put his phone away and quickly jumped up from his seat, wincing as he felt his own bruised body protesting against that sudden movement. He gave Max a loving smile as the man was rolled back into the room and gave him an apologetic look after the nurses had left the room again. ‘’Sorry, Maxy. I got a little lost on my way back so I couldn’t come with you…’’ He explained.

Max just smiled back at Charles and held his hand when he finally could again. ‘’That’s okay, Charlie. Did you eat something?’’ He asked, to which Charles nodded softly. ‘’Yeah, don’t worry.’’ He said. ‘’What’s the verdict on you?’’ He asked his boyfriend, who just sighed deeply, groaning a little as he let his head fall back onto the pillow. Sophie gave Max an encouraging smile and his leg a little pat, before she looked at Charles.

‘’It really isn’t great. He has four broken ribs on his right hand side, his lung is most definitely bruised and there are fractures in his shoulder blade and hip. But we knew about those. Sadly, his wrist is broken as well, and that will take surgery to put back together.’’ Sophie sighed deeply and smiled sadly as she looked at her disappointed son. ‘’They’re going to do the wrist surgery later today, it’ll be a couple of hours long, so you can come home with me and get a shower and a change of clothes. We’ll be back before he’s done.’’ She told Charles, who swallowed thickly. Fuck…a broken wrist, that really wasn’t great.

‘’But…his wrist will go back to normal…?’’ He asked, wanting to make sure, to which Sophie nodded. ‘’The surgeon was pretty certain he could do it, so we have hope. Maxy is just a little disappointed about his wrist. He hoped he wouldn’t need any surgery.’’ Max sighed deeply and gave his mom a look, before he squeezed Charles’ hand. ‘’I’ll be fine.’’ He said decidedly, very much not wanting Charles to worry any further. 

Charles did sigh too and sat back down next to Max’s bed, brushing his boyfriend’s hair with his fingers again. ‘’Yes you will.’’ He said quietly. ‘’And we’ll be here to take care of you after you come out of surgery.’’ He added with a small smile. They spent about another hour together, before the nurse returned and informed them it was time for Max’s surgery. Sophie and Charles said goodbye to him, before he was rolled out again, leaving them together.

‘’Come on, Charles.’’ Sophie told her son’s boyfriend with a gentle smile. ‘’Let’s go home.’’


	21. The Surgery

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 2 updates. In one day. What the hell @ me. Seriously though, I won't be able to keep this up. I somehow also have a full time job next to this...
> 
> So this and the past few chapters I've really slowed everything down in order to show the impact of the crash on both Max and Charles. I expect things to really get going again in a few chapters time, so get ready :D

Charles really didn’t know how to feel as he walked out of the back of the hospital with Sophie, pretty much running to her car so that the paparazzi waiting outside wouldn’t notice them. This proved to be impossible, but they managed to get out relatively unscathed. They didn’t have to answer any questions, there were just some pictures taken of the two of them as they left the hospital. Once they were in the car and had left the parking lot, Charles sighed deeply and sank down into his chair as he stared out the window.

Sophie glanced over at Charles as she heard him sigh and gave him an encouraging smile. ‘’He’s going to be alright, Charles. He has a long road of recovery ahead of him, but I’m sure that he’s going to come out of it even stronger. And he’s still young. He has a very long career still ahead of him.’’ It was quite clear that it was hurting Sophie very much too to see her son like this, but she was still trying to cheer Charles up as he seemed to be taking it even harder. 

‘’Try and relax a little, okay? There’s nothing we can do for him now anyway, other than take care of ourselves, so that we can take care of him later.’’ Charles nodded softly at those words and sat up a little straight, groaning a little as he twisted his body. ‘’You okay?’’ Sophie asked with a small frown. ‘’Are you really sure you’re alright after the crash?’’ Charles sighed softly in return and just shrugged a little. 

‘’I mean…they checked me at the circuit. I think it’s just a lot of muscle aches from the impact and such, but other than that I’m fine, really.’’ Charles told Sophie. Nonetheless, his stomach let out a loud grumble, and Sophie hummed softly. ‘’You need to eat.’’ She told her son’s boyfriend. ‘’So here’s what’s going to happen.’’ She knew exactly what boys like this needed, since she had one of these herself. Guidance. ‘’When we get back to my house, you’re gonna put those clothes in the laundry and take a shower. Then I’ll make you a good lunch and you can relax a little and maybe take a nap before we go back to the hospital.’’

Charles looked at Sophie for a second, before he nodded softly. ‘’Okay…’’ He said quietly. He stared at the Belgian countryside rushing by for a few minutes, before he finally spoke up again. ‘’Can I ask you something?’’ He asked Sophie, looking back at her. When she nodded, he continued. ‘’Do you…could you tell me what they’re writing and saying about the accident?’’ He asked quietly. ‘’Is everyone blaming me?’’ He would look himself, and he really, really wanted to, but it absolutely terrified him to find out. He didn’t want the whole world to hate him, he just wanted to be loved.

Sophie sighed a little at Charles and shook her head. ‘’You’re worrying too much again, Charles.’’ She told him. Max had told her about this tendency of Charles, and she really found it unnecessary. ‘’Most that I have read so far talks just about it being a horrific accident. They’re not putting blame on anyone. Everyone understands that you would never purposefully hurt Max.’’ Charles made an uncomfortable little noise at Sophie’s words and didn’t really look satisfied. ‘’Most…?’’ He asked her. ‘’What does the rest say?’’

If she hadn’t been driving, this would have been the point where Sophie would put her head in her hands. She was though, so she couldn’t. ‘’Charles…’’ She started, but the look on the Monegasque’s face told her that he wasn’t going to let this go. ‘’Some, emphasis on some, are talking about how it was a very stupid mistake of you to make…the latest in a string of them.’’ Charles winced at those words and looked down at his hands as he fidgeted a little with his hoodie. So he was right. It really had been his fault. He still hadn’t seen the footage of the crash, but he had been sure of his guilt from the moment it happened. 

The rest of the drive was spent mostly in silence. Charles was in his head again, his mind filled with bad thoughts. He could already see how it would go from here. The media would keep going after him again and again and again for causing Max to crash like this. It would drive them apart, Max would get keep getting hurt whenever Charles would have a bad day about it and it would just keep going on and on until one day they suddenly found that they hated each other. He couldn’t let that happen. He just couldn’t. He should leave. He should. It would save them both a lot of pain. It w-‘’We’re here.’’ Sophie said. She was looking at Charles, looking very concerned as the Monegasque seemed very far gone into the depths of his mind. ‘’Charles, are you coming?’’

Being spoken to dragged Charles out of his own head and he blinked a few times as he processed what was said to him. ‘’Oh…uh yeah.’’ He told Sophie. He stepped out of the car with her and rubbed the back of his neck a little. His thoughts had been running absolutely crazy and he was still feeling a little uneasy. Sophie led her son’s boyfriend inside and pointed up the stairs. ‘’Second door on the left is the bathroom. Go ahead and shower and I’ll make you something nice to eat.’’ She told him, before she pretty much pushed Charles up the stairs.

Charles didn’t really argue at all and walked upstairs. Something inside of him told him that he really, really should look at Max’s childhood bedroom, but he decided to leave that for later. Now that he was close to a shower, he really started to realize just how much he smelled. He hadn’t had a shower since…oh god, Saturday. There had been no time after the race with the rush to get to the hospital, and he really was in need of one now. So he walked into the bathroom, discarded all of his clothes into the laundry basket and gasped softly as he looked at his body in the mirror for what was really the first time since the accident.

He was bruised. Like a lot. It really wasn’t a pretty sight to look at, and Charles started to realize just why he had been in so much pain when he woke up that morning. He had a huge bruise on his right thigh, and another on his left side that spread from his ribcage all the way down to his hip. He touched it gently at winced at the pain, before he decided to leave it. His pain could wait, it was nothing compared to Max’s. He finally stepped into the shower after letting it warm up for a moment, and he almost got embarrassed at the moan that escaped him once he finally stepped underneath the hot water.

‘’Oh god…’’ He mumbled. The shower felt absolutely incredible. It relaxed his still very tense muscles, and it really allowed Charles a moment of relaxation. For most people, the shower was where they did their thinking, but for Charles, it was where he found his peace and quiet after the difficult days. He could let his mind go to the pleasant nothing as he simply enjoyed the feeling of hot water on his naked skin. He just stood there for a few minutes, letting out a happy sigh of pleasant relief, before he started washing his hair and body, being very careful not to hurt his bruises too much.

In total, he spent nearly half an hour in the shower, before he finally stepped out and dried himself off. Only then did he realize that he didn’t actually have anything to wear, now that his clothes were all in the laundry. He thankfully found a robe in the bathroom and put that on, before he opened the door. He was about to yell and ask Sophie for some clothes, when he saw a neatly folded bundle right in front of the door. Oh…those were probably Max’s clothes. He picked the bundle up and took it back into the bathroom, finding boxers, socks, an old pair of sweatpants and a sweater. He wasn’t about to tell anyone, but he did smell the sweater for a moment, ending up slightly disappointed when he found it smelled of laundry detergent, rather than Max.

Nonetheless, Charles put the clothes on, happy that he was practically the same size as Max so that they fit, and headed downstairs to find Sophie. He looked for a moment, before he finally found her in the kitchen, just finishing their lunch. “Hey Charles. All freshened up I see.” She said and smiled brightly at the Monegasque. “I hope you’re hungry, cause I made you a big lunch and it’s rude not to eat it all.” She was teasing of course, but she still needed Charles to eat a enough. He was looking too thin and exhausted.

Charles sat down then at the kitchen table, and looked a little shocked as Sophie put a big plate of eggs and toast in front of him. “I…thank you Sophie, but…” He stammered. He never ate this much. He watched his diet like an absolute hawk, and eating like this just didn’t happen. “No buts.” Sophie said sternly. “You’re in my care for now and you are eating all of that.” She informed Charles, who just sighed a little, before he finally started to eat. 

He didn’t know if he was just really hungry or if Sophie was the best cook ever, but the lunch tasted absolutely incredible and Charles himself didn’t even believe how quickly he’d finished all of it. Sophie ate her own lunch, and smiled as she watched Charles pretty much inhale all of his food. She reached for a packet she had put on the table then, and put it in front of Charles, along with a glass of water. “Painkillers.” She explained when she got a weird look from Charles. “You’re obviously in a lot of pain, so these will help.”

She hummed softly as she watched Charles dutifully take the pills after some internal deliberation, and nodded softly. “Good. Now, I don’t want to force you, but if you’d like you could go and take a nap in Max’s bed. I’ll wake you up when it’s time to head back to the hospital, so there’s nothing to worry about.” She assured him. Charles hummed softly in return. He bit his lip, considering the offer. In the end, he got up. “I’ll….go lie down at least.” He told Sophie, who smiled in return. “First door on the right. Sweet dreams.” She replied happily, pleased Charles was listening to her advice.

Charles went back upstairs then, and went into Max’s bedroom. It wasn’t entirely what he had expected. It was a lot more…boring. He had expected posters and lots of stuff and just everything that you’d normally find in a teenage boy’s bedroom. Instead, it was just…neat, which disappointed Charles a little. Nonetheless, he was pleased to find that Max had a double bed in his room. It meant that they could at least sleep in the same bed together when Max came home to recover….and Charles wasn’t off racing.

He took his clothes back off and crawled into the comfortable bed. It had been really nice to have a bed under him when Max invited him onto his hospital bed, but this was infinitely better. When he headed upstairs, Charles had been afraid he wouldn’t been able to sleep with the bad thoughts going through his mind again. Instead, the soft comfort of the warm bed lulled him to sleep almost instantly, and he was gone before he knew it.

Charles had slept for about an hour when he was very gently shaken awake. ‘’Charles.’’ Sophie said quietly. ‘’Charles, wake up, sweetie.’’ Charles let out a groan and shook his head, pulling the duvet over his head. He was finally sleeping peacefully, and he really wasn’t ready to wake up yet. ‘’Max is out of surgery. If we go now we can be there when he wakes up.’’ Sophie said. At those words, Charles’ eyes shot open, and he was instantly sitting up, wide awake. ‘’Y-yeah, okay. Let’s go.’’ 

As Charles sat up, the duvet fell away, and Sophie saw the large bruise on the Monegasque’s side. ‘’Oh god, Charles.’’ She said, inspecting it for moment. ‘’That looks…extremely painful. Are you sure you’re alright?’’ She asked, clearly worried. Charles just huffed in response and jumped out of bed, quickly putting his clothes back on. ‘’I’m fine.’’ He told Sophie. He took a deep breath once he was dressed again and gave her a small smile. ‘’Let’s go. I want to be there when he wakes up.’’ 

Sophie still looked a little worried over Charles, but decided not to push it any further. They quickly left together and drove back to the hospital. ‘’The hospital told me the surgery went extremely well and they expect him to fully recover the use of his wrist.’’ She told Charles excitedly as they drove. Charles broke out into a grin too and sighed happily, this really was some much needed good news. ‘’Oh thank god.’’ He said and closed his eyes for a second. ‘’He’ll be so happy.’’

They finally got back to the hospital after a 30 minute drive, one that was a lot more relaxed and happy than the last one had been. Sophie parked the car in a secluded area again, and quickly headed inside with Charles to once again try and skip the paparazzi. They were told that Max had already been brought back to his room, and so they quickly went there. He was still asleep, but he seemed to start stirring a little as they went in. 

Charles immediately went back to his boyfriend’s side and started to gently brush his hair again with a loving smile. ‘’Hey, Maxy.’’ He said quietly. ‘’We’re back. Your mama and I.’’ He told his boyfriend. Max stirred a little more when he heard Charles’ voice, and slowly opened his eyes, taking in a deep breath as he looked around the room. ‘’Heeeeeey…’’ He said, smiling goofily as he was still very much influenced by his medication.

Sophie giggled a little at the expression on her son’s face and leaned over to give him a kiss on his cheek. ‘’Hi there, sweetie. How are you feeling?’’ She asked Max quietly. He hummed softly in return and turned his face up to Charles, pouting a little and clearly asking for a kiss. Charles smiled fondly and shook his head at Max, before he obliged and leaned in, kissing his boyfriend softly, but keeping it light since Max’s mother was in the room.

‘’Better now.’’ Max finally answered his mother after Charles pulled away. ‘’Charles’ kisses are magic and they make me feel better.’’ He said, making Charles fucking giggle. The Monegasque immediately blushed, unsure what exactly had just come out of him, before he just sighed happily and looked lovingly at his boyfriend. ‘’I love you so much.’’ He said quietly.

The rest of the day was spent mostly by cuddling, kissing and just talking a little more once Max’s head had cleared up and he wasn’t being a goofy romantic anymore. That afternoon, Max’s main doctor came by, and informed everyone that since his injuries didn’t really require further hospital care, he would be allowed to return home the next day. They just wanted to keep Max an extra night for observation, but if his condition didn’t worsen, he would be allowed to go home. He just had to come back in a week to get his stitches out, and have them replaced with a cast for his wrist instead.

Charles absolutely hated it, but he and Sophie were forced to go home when the evening finally fell. Someone from the circuit had kindly brought the Max’s phone to the hospital, and so they could at least stay in contact for the night. Max looked really sad when they had to leave though, and it really did break Charles’ heart to see him like this. He kissed his boyfriend again, and gently pressed their foreheads together as he spoke to him. ‘’It’s okay, Maxy. We’ll be back first thing in the morning and then from tomorrow on I can sleep by your side again in your own bed.’’ He whispered. ‘’Stay strong for me, alright?’’

They left after Sophie had said goodbye to Max as well and left the hospital together. It really hurt Charles to leave Max behind in there, but it would be alright. Tomorrow they could take him home. Tomorrow was when it was all going to get better again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Love you all so much, thanks for reading!
> 
> Leave a comment if you have any feedback, I love reading them!


	22. Homecoming

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Slightly longer chapter than normal, because I had slightly more to put in there :D
> 
> Hope you enjoy reading, please let me know if you do!

Charles had another bad night of sleep that night. After getting back to Sophie’s house, he first spent the rest of the evening mostly in calls with friends and family, updating them on the situation with both himself and Max, before he decided called it an early night. As he got into bed, he realized he still hadn’t really read anything about the crash. He just hadn’t really had the time. Even as he just thought about it though, the urge intensified. He knew that he really shouldn’t do it, that it would make him feel bad again, but he just couldn’t hold himself back. He tried to talk himself out of it for a little while, but eventually he did grab his phone and started to read pretty much anything he could find.

What he found made his heart sink. Just the headlines alone were absolutely devastating. They included gems like ‘Charles Leclerc causes huge crash at Spa while lapped’, ‘In new mistake, Leclerc sends Verstappen into the hospital’ and what felt like the worst one from Charles’ perspective: ‘Does Leclerc end Verstappen’s career with crash after break-up rumours emerge?’ He knew by now that the break-up rumours were bullshit, but it still hurt him that they were writing these things. 

When he remembered that he would already have to head to Italy on Wednesday for the Italian Grand Prix, he winced. For the first time in his life, he wasn’t looking forward to a race. Not only would he be forced to be apart from Max for a really, really long time, since he’d probably have to stay in Italy for the race the week after as well, but the media were going to absolutely tear him apart. Really, Charles wanted to just stay right there in that bed, preferably with Max by his side. He wanted to be there for his boyfriend in his recovery. He needed to be. But he couldn’t. They would be home together for exactly one day, before Charles would have to leave for a week and a half, and it hurt him to just think about it.

He didn’t sleep well at all that night. Now that his first worries about Max had left his mind again, it was filled with worries about the future instead. He laid awake for a couple of hours, before he finally fell into a light, not really peaceful sleep. He woke back up again after a number of hours when he heard some noise, and groaned softly when he realized it was probably Sophie getting ready for the day already. It really felt like it was still way too early for that. He let out a long sigh and reached for his phone, nonetheless breaking into a smile when he saw he had some texts from Max.

Most were just sent over the last couple hours asking if Charles was up yet, but the last one made him chuckle a little. ‘I fucking hate this hospital bed. It’s super uncomfortable. Or maybe that’s just my body…Anyway, can’t wait to sleep next to you again and have your magic painkilling kisses whenever I need them :*’ It read. As Charles finished reading the text, the smile slowly faded from his face and he sighed softly. Max was excited to sleep next to him again…he had to know that it’d only be for a single night, right?

Charles finally managed to drag himself out of bed too and was pleased to find that his clothes from Sunday had been washed as he walked into the bathroom, where they were waiting for him. He took a little time to freshen himself up, brush his teeth and all that, before he got dressed and fixed his hair as much as he could. He finally made his way downstairs and found Sophie in the living room. She was talking into the phone with a raised voice, and seemed a little more animated than usual. She was speaking in Dutch though, so Charles couldn’t understand what she was saying, until he heard the name of Max’s father mentioned in an angry tone. Oh no. 

Charles had completely forgotten about Max’s father. The man had devoted his life to making sure his son would become world champion, and Charles had put him in the hospital. Jos had never been a fan of their relationship, he had made that very clear to Max when he told him about it, but Charles was pretty sure he was going to try and kill him now. He was looking a little wide eyed at Sophie as she finally ended her call and sighed deeply. ‘’That was Jos.’’ She told Charles, like that hadn’t been obvious.

‘’He is…a little angry.’’ She added as she started walking back to the kitchen, assuming Charles was going to follow, which he did. ‘’He told me he called Max to ask him whether he could come and visit. Max said no. Decidedly so.’’ She dug around a little in the fridge, getting out everything they would need for their breakfast. ‘’You know that they haven’t spoken ever since you two got together and Jos didn’t give Max his approval, right?’’ She asked, Charles, to which he nodded softly. ‘’He blames you for the accident. Said some…bad things about you to Max, who didn’t take that well at all. So that’s another mess we have to deal with.’’

Sophie sighed deeply again and finally sat down at the table, starting breakfast with Charles. ‘’Anyway…’’ She changed the subject with a smile. ‘’Our Maxy is coming home with us today. Could you do me a favour after we finish here and get some pillows downstairs so we can make the couch nice and comfy for him?’’ Charles easily agreed to that and spent a little while making the house ready, before they finally went on their way. When they finally got back to the hospital, Max didn’t smile, but looked at both Charles and his mom with an annoyed look on his face. He didn’t even greet them, just immediately started talking to his mom in Dutch when she walked in.

‘’Did he call you?’’ Max demanded to know, making Sophie sigh as she sat down next to her son on the edge of his bed. ‘’I did. And I told him that it’s your decision whether you want to see him or not, not his.’’ She said. She could see how worked up Max was about all this, and she wanted to try and calm him down as quickly as she could. He couldn’t use all this anger in his recovery. ‘’Damn right it’s my decision. And I don’t want to fucking see him.’’ Max replied angrily. ‘’I swear to god, mama. If he ever says anything like that about Charles ever again I will never speak another word to him for the rest of my life.’’

‘’Shhhh, Maxy.’’ Sophie said in a calm voice, taking his hand and caressing it gently. ‘’You’re both a little hot headed, so just calm down, okay? Charles and I are here to take you home and you don’t have to see or think about your father until you want to.’’ She assured him. Charles had been standing a little awkwardly to the side so far, but cleared his throat when his name was mentioned for a second time. ‘’Uhm…Hi, Maxy.’’ He said awkwardly, giving his boyfriend a little wave.

Max just sighed deeply at that and pouted a little, reaching for Charles. ‘’You come here.’’ He told his boyfriend, pulling him down to kiss him deeply once the Monegasque did as he was told. ‘’I fucking love you so much and if anyone dares to say anything bad about you you just come to me and I will end them.’’ He told Charles, who looked a little taken aback. ‘’Uhm…okay.’’ He told his boyfriend. ‘’You do know I have no idea what you were just talking about, right….?’’ He asked, to which Max just shook his head. ‘’My asshole dad.’’ He said, earning him a look of disapproval from his mom. ‘’It’s true.’’ He told her, still very angry.

Max held onto Charles for a little while, just wanting to be close to him and admiring how incredibly good his boyfriend was looking that day…and really just every day, before he finally hummed softly. ‘’I’m gonna ask if I can go home now…Are you ready for me there if they let me go?’’ He asked his mother, who smiled brightly and nodded. ‘’Of course! Charles made you a comfy bed on the couch, so we’re all ready for you!’’ She said happily.

Max chuckled a little at that and gave his boyfriend another kiss, before he pressed the button to call for a nurse. They waited for a minute, before one finally walked in. ‘’Hi.’’ Max greeted happily. ‘’I would very much like to go home now please. Could you please let me?’’ He said, on his very best behaviour as if that would help in the slightest. The nurse chuckled a little and smiled. ‘’I’ll get the doctor.’’ He said, before he left the room again and returned with Max’s doctor a little while later.

‘’So, mr. Verstappen. All ready to head out then?’’ He asked curiously, as he went through Max’s numbers for a final time before nodding. ‘’As far as I am concerned, you’re good to go, so if you’re feeling well eno-’’ He said, before Max instantly interrupted him. ‘’Yes, I’m great. I’m going home.’’ He stated quickly, giving Charles’ hand such a hard squeeze that Charles actually started to wince a little in pain. 

The doctor just chuckled a little and nodded. ‘’Alright then.’’ He said and turned back to the nurse. ‘’Could you please take care of the discharge paperwork and call an ambulance to take mr. Verstappen home?’’ Max looked back up at Charles then, looking nervous and just the tiniest bit scared. ‘’Will you ride with me?’’ He asked quietly, to which Charles nodded eagerly. ‘’Of course, Maxy. And you can squeeze my hand as much as you want if it hurts.’’ The Belgian roads were famous for being a little…bumpy, and Charles realized that it wouldn’t be the most pleasant of drives with Max’s injuries.

It wasn’t long before everything had been taken care of, and they were ready to take Max home. They were going to bring him to an ambulance parked at the back of the hospital, out of the view of paparazzi, to give the Dutchman as much privacy as possible. It took him a little while and a lot of pain and sweat, but Max managed to finally sit up and dangle his legs over the edge of the bed. He slowly moved towards the ground, and managed to finally put his weight down and stand, while leaning heavily on Charles. Still, it was a lot of progress.

‘’You’re doing amazing, babe.’’ Charles whispered into his ear. ‘’I’m proud of you.’’ He told Max, as the Dutchman carefully shuffled to the wheelchair and let himself slowly sink down into it with Charles’ help. Max let out a deep, relieved breath once he was finally sitting again and closed his eyes. ‘’That was the hardest fucking thing I have ever done in my entire life.’’ He said, even sounding a little out of breath at the effort it had cost him.

Charles decided he would be the one to push Max’s wheelchair and leaned over to give him a quick kiss on his cheek. ‘’Let’s go home, babe.’’ He told his boyfriend, pushing him out of the room. Max thanked his doctor and the nurses for their care, before they finally went downstairs together. They went over to the ambulance, where the paramedics carefully loaded him onto the stretcher and put him in the back of the ambulance. Sophie said goodbye for the moment, before she quickly left so that she’d be home when the ambulance got there.

Charles climbed into the ambulance after Max and sat down next to him, taking his hand and caressing it softly. Max was still looking scared, but Charles’ touch seemed to relax him a little if nothing else. The ride home proved to be a lot better than either of them had hoped. Because they weren’t in a rush, they drove nice and calm, meaning that there were minimal impacts on Max’s body from bumps in the road. Additionally, the paramedic that sat with them in the back turned out to be a huge Formula 1 fan, and whereas Charles was a little hesitant of engaging with him at first, it proved to be a very welcome distraction for Max.

They finally turned up the driveway of Sophie’s home after about 40 or so minutes, and the paramedics were kind enough to help Max all the way inside. They pushed the stretched all the way over to the living room, where Max, with some help from Charles, got off of the thing and moved the short distance to the couch, where he laid down with a pleased sigh. ‘’Thank you guys!’’ He told the paramedics and gave them a little wave of thanks before he just relaxed with his eyes closed, needing a few minutes to himself after all that effort and the long journey.

Sophie and Charles thanked the paramedics as well and walked them back to their ambulance, before they hurried back inside to be with Max. Charles sat down on the couch next to his boyfriend and leaned in to give him a sweet kiss. ‘’Finally out of that place and back home.’’ He said and sighed happily. ‘’How are you feeling, Maxy?’’ He asked curiously. Max just hummed softly in return and let out a yawn before answering. ‘’Honestly? This was more tiring than racing in Singapore. I’m exhausted, but the pain is manageable.’’ He told the two people worrying over him. 

‘’Do you want to take a nap, sweetie? We can leave you be for a little while if you like.’’ Sophie offered her son with a loving smile, to which Max was quick to shook his head. He pulled Charles in a little closer, he was on his good side anyway, and turned his head to nuzzle into his boyfriend’s hoodie a little. ‘’I would really like a nap, but I also want Charles to stay.’’ He decided, before he looked up at the Monegasque. ‘’Will you, please?’’

Seeing Max like this both warmed Charles’ heart and broke it a little. He seemed so sweet and tender, so pretty and romantic, but at the same time he was in so much pain, and he needed his boyfriend to make it better. ‘’Of course I’ll stay with you, Maxy.’’ Charles answered easily. ‘’I didn’t sleep great again last night, so I could use a nap, too.’’ He told his boyfriend. Sophie hummed softly as she watched and checked the clock. ‘’Stay awake for a minute longer, sweetie. It’s time for your painkillers.’’ She informed Max, before she left the room to go get them.

Max sighed softly. He waited patiently for Sophie to return and took his pills like he was told, before he zeroed in completely on Charles’ words once she had left the room to let them nap. ‘’You didn’t keep yourself awake by reading bullshit on the internet again, right?’’ He asked, making Charles blush slightly. He was a terrible fucking liar. ‘’I…uhm…I…fuck. I kinda did…?’’ He finally offered, making Max sigh deeply. ‘’You need to stop that.’’ He told his boyfriend, nuzzling back into his very soft and warm hoodie. ‘’You promised me that you wouldn’t focus too much on that shit and I will get very upset with you if you break that promise.’’ He mumbled.

Charles just sighed in return and decided to ignore the subject any further for now, not really wanting to talk about it. There were more pressing matters anyway. He shuffled around a little until he could lie down properly next to his boyfriend and looked into his eyes. ‘’Maxy, you know that I have to leave tomorrow, right?’’ He asked quietly, making Max frown in response. ‘’Are you in well enough condition to drive…?’’ The Dutchman asked quietly. ‘’I…you seemed so hurt too that I kinda assumed you would have to stay…’’ He admitted, biting his lip a little. Fuck. He had been so focussed on getting home to be with Charles that he hadn’t even considered the possibility that his boyfriend would actually have to leave again right away.

‘’But you’ll be back on Sunday, right? You’re not going back to Monaco or whatever?’’ Max asked after he thought it over, making Charles sigh and shake his head. ‘’I’m sorry.’’ He whispered, giving his boyfriend a soft, gentle kiss. ‘’I have to stay in Italy. Mugello is next weekend and I have meetings in Italy all week long.’’ He said, trying his best to give an encouraging smile. Max started to frown in return as he thought it over and ended up just staring at Charles for a moment. ‘’But…that’s a week and a half then before I see you again…’’ He finally said, his frown slowly fading away in exchange for a look of pure sadness in his eyes. ‘’Charlie…I…I can’t miss you for that long.’’ He said quietly. 

No. This just wasn’t happening. For the past 2 days, all of his thoughts had been with Charles. He had lived through the pain with really only the thought of being reunited with his boyfriend keeping him going in his worst moments of despair. To now have to hear that Charles was going to leave him for a week and a half was almost too much to handle, especially in Max’s current fragile state. He shook his head and finally just nuzzled his face back into Charles’ hoodie, really not wanting to talk about this anymore.

Charles held Max as much as he could without hurting him and placed a kiss on top of his head. ‘’Are you okay, Maxy?’’ He asked quietly, earning him a headshake in return. ‘’No, Charles. I’m not okay. Fuck, I….I need you.’’ Max mumbled in return. He didn’t want to do this, he didn’t want to be this weak. Fuck. He was the strong one in their relationship, the one that always looking out for the both of them. Why was he fucking crying?! 

Max let out a little sniffle then and swallowed thickly before he spoke up again. ‘’I’m sorry.’’ He said quietly. ‘’You have to go, I know. I just…I don’t know, I guess I somehow thought you’d be able to stay with me.’’ Charles could feel the wetness on his own cheeks as Max broke down in his arms, and he shook his head. ‘’You know that I’d stay if I could, Maxy.’’ He said quietly. He placed another kiss on his boyfriend’s head then and closed his eyes again, wondering how the both of them were ever going to survive being apart for so long.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time: Charles has to leave. Also a lot of angst, which has apparently become my trademark...?


	23. Don't Go, Stay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, just a heads up. The start of this chapter is a little lighter and fluffier in parts than it has been for a little while, but for good reason....it's also the last of it we're gonna have for a while. So you better enjoy it....
> 
> Thanks for reading as always, and I love to hear your thoughts if you have any <3

Charles held Max in his arms as his boyfriend cuddled against his chest and just let out a long and deep sigh. “We’ll get through this together, Maxy.” He told the Dutchman quietly. “You still have your mom here to take care of you and we will video call every day until I get back. It’ll be over before you know it.” He didn’t even believe himself as he said it, and judging by the sad look he got in return, Max didn’t either. “You know that that’s not the same, Charles.” He replied with a pout. “I want to touch you and smell you and kiss you and just have you physically here with me.”

He shivered a little at the memories coming into his mind and tried to cuddle even closer to his boyfriend. “I have never felt as lonely as I felt in that hospital.” He finally said quietly. “I couldn’t sleep, Charles. I was in so much pain, everything was foreign to me, and you weren’t there to make it better. That was one night….How am I going to get through 11 of those without you here?” 

Charles swallowed thickly as he listened to Max and finally just closed his eyes as he shook his head. “I don’t know…” He whispered, biting his lip to keep himself from crying. God, Max was basically begging him to stay at this point, and it was the hardest thing of Charles’ life to not just cancel his entire season so he could take of his boyfriend in his hour of need. “All I can do is stay with you right now, and try and give you enough love that it will get you through the next week and a half.” He said with a tiny smile.

Max let out another groan at those words and after a minute, just let out another deep sigh, resigning to his fate. “You know…” He told Charles. “You saying you’re gonna give me love would normally be followed by me kissing you and telling you to fuck me and I fucking hate that we can’t do that right now because I could really use it to get all this stress out of my body.” He gently put his good hand on Charles’ cheek and caressed the Monegasque’s cheek with his thumb. “You not having shaved in days and growing a bit of a sexy stubble isn’t really helping me keep it down by the way.” He said with a teasing little smile.

Charles chuckled softly at his boyfriend and ended up just kissing him in response to all that. He really tried to keep it sweet and gentle, but Max had other plans. He wrapped his good arm around Charles and pulled him in closer, deepening their kiss and letting the Monegasque in if he wanted to. Before Charles even knew it, they were full on making out, and he really hadn’t realized just how fucking much he had missed this kind of intimacy with Max, too. He pulled away breathless after a little while, and opened his eyes to see a very familiar look on Max’s face. Want. Which…fuck, that got Charles going.

They couldn’t though. Max was very, very injured, and they were on his mother’s couch for crying out loud. Charles closed his eyes for a moment to try and calm his body down and groaned when Max just took his hand and put it on his crotch. “This is what you fucking do to me, Leclerc.” The Dutchman told him, before he tried to kiss Charles again. Before he could though, Charles managed to pull away. “Fuck, Maxy…” He said, taking his hand off of his boyfriend’s erection and putting it back on his side instead. “You know we can’t. Your injuries…. And we’re on your mom’s fucking couch.”

Max let out a annoyed groan in return and just started to pout at Charles as he looked into his boyfriend’s eyes. ‘’I fucking hate not being able to just drag you to bed and have my way with you.’’ He mumbled, making Charles chuckle a little in return. ‘’I know, babe. Once you’re well enough again to return home to Monaco we can have all the sex you want, but you need your bedrest now.’’ He told Max, who finally just sighed deeply and stopped trying to seduce his boyfriend. 

It wasn’t long before the Dutchman started to yawn again, the efforts of the day finally catching up with him again now that his initial horniness for Charles had passed. He snuggled back into his boyfriend and hummed softly. ‘’Charlie, are you able to not move away from me, but also grab that blanket from over there?’’ He asked, gesturing at a folded up blanket underneath the coffee table.

Charles hummed softly and turned around to look. ‘’Uhm…I’ll try…’’ He offered. He reached out as far as he possibly could, not really wanting to stop cuddling with Max either, but it was just…too…far…away. If he could just reach that tiny bit more he co-‘’FUCK.’’ Charles called out as he rolled off of the couch and straight onto the floor. As he watched it happen, Max just started laughing uncontrollably, before he instantly put his hands on his ribs, because that fucking HURT. ‘’Oh…fuck. You dick. Don’t make me laugh!’’ He told Charles as he continued to chuckle.

Charles just rubbed at his back a little and gave Max a hurt look. ‘’You’re the one laughing while I could have died in that fall!’’ He told his boyfriend. He did grab the blanket Max requested, and draped it over the pair of them as he laid back down on the couch next to his boyfriend. ‘’Mhmmm.’’ Max finally agreed, looking a lot more pleased now that he had both Charles close and the warm blanket on top of him. He sighed happily and cuddled back into his boyfriend’s chest, before he let his eyes fall closed and slept soundly against Charles.

Charles looked on lovingly as he watched Max fall asleep and placed a few kisses on his head as they cuddled together. ‘’I love you.’’ He whispered. He held Max for a little while, making sure that his boyfriend was sleeping soundly, before he finally got up. He tucked the Dutchman in with the blanket and placed another kiss on top of his head, before he left the room. He ran into Sophie in the hallway, and she gestured to the bags that were now standing there. ‘’Someone from Ferrari came by with all of your things.’’ She told him. ‘’So you at least have everything to head to Italy in the morning.’’

After checking to see if all of his things were there, Charles looked back and Sophie and sighed deeply. ‘’Max thought that I wouldn’t have to go. That my crash meant that I could stay with him. He really didn’t take the news well.’’ Sophie sighed a little and nodded. ‘’That was to be expected. He’s in a pretty fragile state right now emotionally, so any bad news might set him off. I’ll deal with the fallout though, don’t you worry, Charles.’’ She assured him.

Charles gave Sophie a thankful smile. It was really, really great that he didn’t have to deal with this alone and that Max’s mother was being such an amazing support for the both of them. He gave her a hug then, which surprised her a little. ‘’Oh, okay…’’ She said, but hugged Charles back. ‘’Thank you for everything.’’ Charles told her. ‘’I don’t know what we would have done if you hadn’t been there for us.’’

Sophie smiled in return then and chuckled softly as they pulled away from the hug. ‘’You don’t have to thank me, Charles. You’re family too now, so of course I want to make sure you’re okay.’’ She glanced into the living room to make sure Max was still asleep, before she looked back at Charles. ‘’I don’t think he’s ever been so in love with anyone before. You’re really someone special, Charles.’’ She told the Monegasque, making him blush a little. ‘’I…thanks.’’ He said just, feeling slightly embarrassed in front of his boyfriend’s mom.

Charles spent the rest of the time of Max’s nap calling back all the people who he had been ignoring before, which was mostly people like his PR team, managers etc. When Max woke back up, they spent what was left of the day together, mostly cuddling and kissing and just trying to keep things as nice and relaxed as possible. When the evening fell, they ran into a problem that they hadn’t actually considered before…how to get Max upstairs. With some effort, he managed to walked to the stairs on his own, but that’s where the easy part ended.

They tried a couple of different ways, before finally, Charles decided that he could carry his boyfriend. He had Max hold onto his neck, and very gently lifted him up by his thighs so that he wouldn’t put any pressure on the man’s ribs or wrist. Nonetheless, it still hurt Max, and he had to wipe a couple of tears from his eyes when they finally reached the bedroom. ‘’Fuck…’’ Max mumbled as Charles sat him down on the edge of the bed. ‘’I am not looking forward to doing that again…’’ He said, taking a few deep breaths.

Charles sat down next to Max and put a hand on his boyfriend’s shoulder, rubbing gently. ‘’Are you okay, babe?’’ He asked, a concerned look on his face. Max nodded softly in response, not wanting to worry Charles too much. ‘’Yeah, fine. Just need a minute.’’ He said with a weak smile. ‘’Could you please help me undress? I still can’t really move too much to take my clothes off…’’ Charles quickly agreed to help and got up, carefully helping Max to undress so they could get into bed. ‘’Well this is very different than the last time I undressed you.’’ The Monegasque teased, making Max shake his head and smile fondly. ‘’Shut up. Don’t you fucking dare get me turned on again!’’ 

Max carefully laid down underneath the duvet then, and let out a pleased sigh as he could finally relax again. The journey upstairs had been a rough one. He turned his head to look at Charles then, and bit his lip as he watched his boyfriend undress and get ready for bed, too. ‘’I thought I said to not turn me on.’’ He told Charles, who just laughed in return. ‘’This is not a striptease, Maxy. I’m just trying to get into bed so that we can cuddle in a super platonic way.’’ He said and winked. He finally took his socks off, before he quickly got into bed next to Max, leaning over to give him a kiss. ‘’Ready. You want cuddles?’’ He asked, to which Max nodded quickly. ‘’Yes.’’ He replied decidedly, moving in a little closer and putting his head down on Charles’ shoulder.

With a loving smile, Charles turned on his side and moved in close to Max, kissing his cheek as they cuddled together. ‘’I’m so happy I have you here next to me tonight.’’ He said quietly, making Max sigh deeply in turn. ‘’Only for one night though…’’ He said sadly, still not really over the fact that he would have to miss Charles for eleven actual days. Which was just…an eternity. Charles sighed softly at Max and gently caressed his boyfriend’s uninjured hip as they cuddled together. ‘’Maxy…’’ He said quietly. ‘’I hate it too, but you are the one that tells me to focus on the positive. We’re here now, the two of us. I really don’t want to think about the race weekend yet, so can we please just focus on the now?’’

Charles wasn’t lying. If he just thought about the next couple of days alone he could feel his heart sink. He had read enough in the media by now that he was sure they’d come after him, and he wouldn’t have Max to calm him down if he got into a bad mood. Pierre would probably be too busy too, with his new Red Bull duties and all, and so he’d really be all by himself. 

They spent a little more time just being together, finding comfort and peace in each other’s presence, before they decided to go to sleep. The night went reasonably well. Charles didn’t have any bad dreams, as was usually the case when Max was by his side, and Max only woke up a few times when he made a weird move in his sleep and the pain shot through his body. The alarm of Charles’ phone woke them up at 8 in the morning, so that they would have a little more time together before the Monegasque’s flight was scheduled. 

Charles stretched himself out and let out a pleased moan at the feeling. He rubbed his face a little, helping himself to wake up a little before he finally blinked his eyes open and was greeted by a pair of blue ones staring back at him. ‘’Hi…’’ Charles mumbled, rubbing at one of his eyes a little more to get the sleep out. ‘’Hey, Charlie.’’ Max whispered in return. He had a small smile on his face as he looked at his boyfriend and leaned over to peck his lips. ‘’Have I ever told you how good looking you are in the morning?’’

Apparently, Max had already been awake for a while, and Charles’ brain was still having a little bit of trouble processing all those words in his third language first thing in the morning. ‘’You’re…pretty.’’ He mumbled in return, making Max chuckle as he cuddled with his boyfriend. ‘’And you’re also adorable. And mine.’’ The Dutchman added happily. He waited patiently for Charles to wake up properly before he just kissed his boyfriend again. 

Charles was finally awake enough to reply to the kiss and held Max nice and close as they made out for a moment. He finally pulled away and regarded his boyfriend with a loving smile, gently caressing his cheek. ‘’I’m gonna miss you so fucking much.’’ He said quietly. ‘’I can call you whenever I want to, right?’’ He asked, to which Max rolled his eyes a little. ‘’Do I look like I have a single other thing to do than talk to my boyfriend?’’

‘’Well I don’t know.’’ Charles replied and shrugged a little. ‘’You might not want me calling you 24/7. You could get sick of me…’’ He said and pouted. Max hummed softly at that and kissed Charles again. ‘’I could never get sick of you. And if anyone tries to tell you otherwise, send them to me. I’ll beat them up.’’ He said and winked. They laid there for a little while longer, before Charles finally got out of bed, getting himself ready for the day and the trip to Italy. After he was done, he helped Max out of bed and to get dress, before the Dutchman insisted he could make it down the stairs on his own. Charles…did not really agree, but he let Max, because there was no arguing to be done when he got something like this in his head.

They slowly made their way over to the stairs, where Max took a deep breath and started to very slowly and carefully make his way down, taking it step by step. He let out a little groan of pain every time he stepped down onto the next step, but he managed..sort of. He could take a little pain. He finally sighed in relief when he reached the ground and leaned on Charles as soon as the man was back next to him. ‘’Why do they build stairs with so many steps?’’ He complained. ‘’It’s dumb.’’

They made their way back to the living room after that, where Max parked himself on the couch for the day. Charles brought him breakfast and spent a couple more hours with his boyfriend in a nice, relaxed atmosphere, before it was finally time to head out. He had wanted to call a taxi to take him, but after much insistence, he finally allowed Sophie to take him instead. With a last glance on the clock, Charles turned to his boyfriend and took his hand, caressing it gently. ‘’It’s time, Maxy.’’ He told the Dutchman. ‘’I’ll see you in a week and a half. Be strong for me, okay? Listen to your mom and don’t you move a centimetre more than you need to. You need all the rest you can get.’’

Max had been a little quiet for the past half an hour or so, knowing that the moment that Charles would have to leave was coming up. He didn’t meet Charles’ eyes as the Monegasque spoke to him, and was instead looking down at this blanket. Fuck, why was this so hard? ‘’Okay. I love you Charlie.’’ He finally replied, his voice breaking slightly halfway though. No. Fuck. He just had to get Charles out the door without crying. He had a week and a half to do that afterwards. He just couldn’t have Charles worry over him, it was unfair to his boyfriend to do that to him.

Charles’ heart broke almost entirely in two as he heard his boyfriend’s voice breaking. He hugged Max, still very careful not to hurt him, and kissed his cheek a few times. ‘’I love you too, Maxy. I love you so fucking much.’’ He whispered. Max was really reaching his breaking point. He wanted to beg Charles to stay. To tell him that he couldn’t possible do this without him. That his body just hurt so fucking much and he really couldn’t deal with the additional pain and heartache of missing Charles for so long. But he didn’t. He swallowed his pain. He took a deep breath and wiped the tears from his eyes, before he pulled away from the hug and gave Charles the most sincere smile he could manage.

‘’Make me proud, okay?’’ He asked his boyfriend, who nodded in response. ‘’I’ll do my best, Maxy.’’ He promised, giving the Dutchman one long, final kiss, before he finally left. Max watched Charles and his mom leave, and as soon as he heard the car leave the driveway, he started to cry. He couldn’t do this. He really couldn’t fucking do this without Charles. He could feel the tears rolling down his cheeks as he sobbed, but he didn’t care anymore. He was all alone, and he was broken, inside and out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh why am I crying along with Max at the end of the chapter? Why do I break my boys? I don't know. But it's gonna get worse. So buckle up.


	24. Separation Anxiety

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooooo it's a sad one, be warned. 
> 
> Also AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH at that race. My sweet little french cupcake won and I'm so happy for him <3
> 
> As always, love you for reading and comment if you have anything to say! :D

When Sophie finally returned from the airport about an hour later, she was planning on spending some nice quality time with Max, to distract him a little from the fact that he would have to miss his handsome boyfriend for so long. What she did not expect to find, was her son curled up on the couch where she’d left him, a crying, broken mess of a boy. She quickly hurried over to his side and crouched down, wiping the tears from his cheek. “Oh, sweetie, what’s wrong? Did you hurt yourself?” She asked, very worried about her son’s injuries and looking him up and down to see whether she could discover anything.0

Max was quick to shake his head and sniffled as he wiped his eyes with the sleeve of his sweater. “N-no, mama. I just…I can’t do this without Charles. It hurts so much and I won’t be able to see him for so long and I just have to sit here and watch as they all go on racing and…I just don’t know anymore.” He said, crying into his mother’s shoulder as she held him and tried to calm him down. It was the combination of everything really that was just too overwhelming. He had already been in a more emotional state than usual with the reveal of his relationship with Charles, and the meds he was taking now only amplified his feelings about missing his boyfriend and the rest of the racing season. Charles leaving was really just the straw that broke the camel’s back. And oh was Max broken. 

Sophie carefully held her son close without hurting him and gently rubbed his back. “Mama’s here, sweetie. It’s going to be alright. I’m going to help you get through the next 2 weeks and then Charles will be back to take care of you. We’re just going to take it day by day, okay? And if that’s too much to think about right now, we’ll do it hour by hour, or minute by minute. Just make it manageable in your mind.” She kissed Max’s cheek a few times and felt how the crying slowly stopped as she held him.

“I’m just….my head is so full, mama. And I….I feel so alone. I know I shouldn’t say that because you are here and I love you but….my heart hurts…” Max confessed quietly. He slowly pulled away from the hug and swallowed thickly, unable to look his mother in the eye after that confession. Sophie sat down next to her son and put an arm around him, allowing Max to lean against her if he needed to. “He’s special, isn’t he?” She asked quietly. She wasn’t mad, or even really hurt by Max’s confession. He was her little boy, and she could read him like a book. But he was an adult now, and that meant he needed the person he fell in love with, not just his mother.

Max nodded softly at Sophie’s question and bit his lip, thinking about the question before he answered. “I….He is, mama.” He told her quietly. “I don’t think I have never loved anyone like this before. I didn’t even know that it was possible.” He had to swallow again and took a deep breath. “Being around him calms me. Everything makes sense when I’m around Charles. It allows me to be the caring one when I’m with him, because he makes me feel whole and complete, and I want to do the same for him…But when he isn’t here….a part of me is just gone and it makes me feel so alone. And I just want to cry and shut myself in until I can see him again.”

Opening his heart helped a little to understand his own wild emotions and put things into some perspective, but the underlying problem was still there. “How am I going to get through 2 entire weeks without him? He distracts me from the pain, he makes me laugh when I’m sad, he motivates me when I want to give up. I need him, mama.” Max said, finally looking up at his mother for guidance. Sophie had a sad smile on her face as Max looked at her. She was happy that he could still open up to her like this, but sad because he was hurting just so very much. She finally placed a kiss on her son’s forehead and just held him close. “I know you do, Max.” She told him quietly.

She gently rubbed his shoulder as they cuddled together and hummed softly. “And I know that I can’t replace him, but I’m going to do my very best to try.” She assured her son. “So, here’s what we’re gonna do. I’m going to get you something to eat, we are going to watch whatever you want on Netflix and after that you are going to take a nap. Charles will have landed by the time you wake up and you can talk to him then, okay?” Max nodded softly at that and kissed his mother’s cheek. “Thank you, mama.” He told her, feeling a little less lonely with her around.

Charles usually didn’t mind flying. It tended to be one of the last moments of peace before a hectic race weekend, and so he usually quite enjoyed it while it lasted. Now though, it was just another time without anything to distract him from the sinking feeling of dread in the pit of his stomach. He had looked at himself in the mirror and found that he still looked exhausted, pale, and malnourished. Which wasn’t ideal. He just kept thinking back on that last moment before he’d left. When he said goodbye to Max and his boyfriend broke down a little in front of him. Not for the first time since the crash either.

He had never seen Max cry, really cry before then. Sure, he’d seen his boyfriend shed a tear before at a sad movie or whatever, but genuinely crying because he just couldn’t take it anymore, that was new. It was like Max at all and it worried Charles immensely. Max had always been the strong one in their relationship. The safety net that Charles was always able to fall back on. If that wasn’t there anymore, there was no telling just how deep he’d fall the next time things got too overwhelming. That’s what worried him the most. Max had been there for him when he got too lonely and depressed during lockdown to lift his spirits. He had been his rock when it all got too much for Charles after their relationship was exposed. But now. Now that Charles was going to get destroyed after nearly killing his boyfriend, he had nothing to fall back on. Nobody at his side who could help fight the bad thoughts. And it absolutely terrified him.

When Charles landed in Milan, there was a team car waiting for him to take him to the circuit. He gave away all of his bags so they could bring those to his hotel and got in the car, where he decided to call Max. The Dutchman had indeed woken up from his nap not too long before, and picked up the phone pretty much as soon as he saw his boyfriend’s name as the caller-ID. “Hey, Charlie!” It sounded excitedly, making Charles chuckle. “Hi there, Maxy. Everything okay? You still feeling alright, taking your meds on time?” He asked curiously.

Max fondly rolled his eyes on Charles’ worry, but answered him anyway. “Everything is still the same, so not okay, but not really worse either. I’m still feeling the same too and yes mom has forced me to take my pills even though I hate them cause they make my head feel fuzzy.” He said, sighing deeply at the end. Charles hummed softly at that and sat back in his seat, watching the city go by. “I know they do, babe. But they also make sure you’re not hurting so much, so….it’s still an overall win in my book. So your mom is taking good care of you then?”

Max nodded in return to Charles, but giggled a little when he finally realized that his boyfriend couldn’t see that. This wasn’t a video call after all. God, his head really was starting to feel funny again and thinking was proving to be kinda hard. “Yes. Yes she is. After she came home from taking you the airport she even took care of me when I cried because I was so sad you left, so she’s the best.” He answered Charles, not even really realizing that he had said exactly what he had not wanted the Monegasque to know. 

Charles’ heart nearly broke again then. Max had cried over him. Oh no. Oh no that wasn’t okay at all. He shouldn’t be here. He should be there, with his Maxy, taking care of him. “I….are you feeling better now, Maxy? Are you still crying?” He asked, hearing Max sigh deeply on the other end. “No I’m not crying anymore…but that doesn’t mean I’m not still really sad that you left me.” The Dutchman answered. “I’m sad too…” Charles said quietly, before he noticed that they were getting close to the track.

“Shit. Maxy, I need to go. I love you very much and I will call you tonight, okay?” Charles said. “Okay, I love yo-“ He started, but then heard the dial tone, as Charles had apparently already ended the call. “Too…” Max still whispered into nothing, sniffling a little again as the sadness returned. Hearing Charles was amazing and all, but all it really did was get Max straight back into that mindset of missing his boyfriend. And that feeling was almost as painful as his broken bones.

Charles’ day was mostly as he had hoped after that. Media day wasn’t until the next day, so his schedule was mostly filled with strategy meetings, team meetings and sponsor activities that he had approximately 0 motivation for. Lots of people asked about his and Max’s health, but they didn’t push any further beyond that. He started to feel a little more at ease again, getting the feeling that the team was behind him again and supporting him. That was…until he overheard a conversation he wasn’t supposed to.

“-just can’t get over the fact that he suddenly decided he’s gay. I used to even like him. It’s fucking disgusting.” A male voice said. “I agree. It’s not only disgusting, but the bible forbids it, too. Maybe that crash in Spa was the work of God, punishing the sinners for their evil.” Someone else started laughing, and Charles’ stomach turned as listened. “No, it was definitely our emotional, little faggot who did that, not God. I heard he decided to make Verstappen crash after hearing rumours he wanted to break up with him. What a fucking pussy.”

Charles should have said something. He should have confronted them. He should’ve made them eat their words and gotten them fired. But he didn’t. He just…turned around and walked away. Faster and faster, until he was full on running. He ran into a bathroom and threw up into one of the toilets. Trembling, he flushed it and let himself fall over against the wall, turning around until he sat on the floor. Fuck. So it really was true. Even his own team hated him. It wasn’t….it wasn’t even the homophobia, Charles knew that that would be there with certain people. But these people knew him. To think that they would even for a moment entertain the thought that he would deliberately crash into someone and almost get them killed made him sick. If that was how his own fucking team thought about him, how the hell would the rest of the world look at him?

He managed to clean himself back up as well as possible could in that bathroom and found a breath mint to hide the fact that he’d been throwing up. He thankfully didn’t have to talk to too many more people after that and could keep the act up for as long as the meeting lasted, but he was back in the car to his hotel as soon as was humanly possible. He pretty much stumbled into his hotel room then and just curled himself up on the bed. Charles’ chest felt tight, and he felt like was going to have a panic attack. Fuck. This is normally when Max would come and save him, hold him, tell him it would be alright in the end because they were together.

Charles tried his very best, asking himself ‘What would Max do?’ and telling himself those things over and over again in his mind. It helped the slightest bit, and though he still felt absolutely fucking terrible, he didn’t feel like he was having a panic attack anymore. He just stayed there for a little while, and contemplated calling it an early night when his phone started ringing. Which in itself wasn’t strange, but it was Max’s ringtone, and Charles wasn’t entirely sure he could handle that at the moment. He feared that he would panic again, that he would tell him things Max didn’t need to know because he’d worry too much. He just kept debating it in his head until finally, the sound stopped. Max had called, and Charles had ignored him. Fuck.

Max remained quiet for a moment after Charles didn’t answer the phone. It went to voicemail, but Max just ended the call there. He would talk to his boyfriend himself, not via fucking voicemail. When she didn’t hear anything, Sophie walked back into the living room and hummed softly as she looked at her son. ‘’Something wrong? I thought you were going to call Charles? Is he still busy at the track?’’ She asked Max, who shook his head. ‘’No…he shouldn’t be. He texted me his schedule, he’s supposed to be back at the hotel by now. I’ll try him again, maybe he was just doing something.’’ Max replied, before he tried again.

Charles winced when the silence was broken once again by Max’s ringtone, and he closed his eyes for a second. He couldn’t ignore Max a second time, that was just out of the question. Besides, something urgent might have happened if Max called him again, and he needed to know that. So, in the end, he finally answered. ‘’Hi, Maxy. Sorry about just now, I uh…I just missed you call.’’ He lied, already calling himself an idiot for being so unconvincing.

‘’Hey, Charlie.’’ Max replied, clearly happy to hear his boyfriend’s voice. ‘’That’s okay. Are you still busy? I thought you were finished at the track already, so I figured it was a good time…’’ He told Charles. ‘’Yeah, I just got back to the hotel.’’ The Monegasque replied. ‘’Sorry, I was just changing and getting ready to relax so I didn’t get to my phone in time is all. I was about to call you back.’’ He lied again, but Max seemed pleased enough with that answer.

‘’So how was your day then? Anything interesting happen at the track? Predictions for the weekend? You can tell me now cause I can’t use it against you anyway…’’ Max said, trying to laugh a little at his own joke, but making it very clear that he absolutely hating being stuck at home. It gave Charles a moment to gather his thoughts. There was no way he was telling Max what had happened. He didn’t need to worry over that, he had enough on his plate already. So instead, he settled on just keeping it as normal as possible. ‘’Oh, you know. Nothing special…Just strategy meetings, sponsor talks and all that. The Italian Grand Prix is a bit boring now that there are no fans if I’m honest. You’re not missing much.’’ 

Max just sighed softly in return and shook his head. ‘’You know that I don’t give a fuck about all the side things, Charlie. But thanks for trying to cheer me up. I’d give everything to be there right now. Fuck it’s gonna hurt to see Pierre driving my car on tv.’’ He sighed again then, just seemingly a little grumpy about everything now. ‘’Can you at least make me a promise for the weekend, Charlie?’’ He asked then, making Charles look a little confused. ‘’Uhm, yeah of course. What?’’ He asked Max, who hummed softly. ‘’That you won’t let the haters get to you this weekend and show them what future world champion Charles motherfucking Leclerc can do. Will you make me that promise, for my sake?’’

Charles just chuckled softly at Max and shook his head, before he just looked down sadly. He knew he couldn’t promise that. Things had already been getting to him, and he just almost had a fucking panic attack. He really didn’t know just how much more of this he could take. On the other hand, he could hear the hope in Max’s voice. He wanted to be there through Charles. To push him towards greatness, and that meant that Charles just couldn’t say no. ‘’I promise, Maxy. I promise I’ll do my best to make you proud.’’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time: The Italian Grand Prix which....might just be as crazy as the real one was. We'll see ;)


	25. The Show Must Go On

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 2 chapters in a day. What the fuck @ me. I just couldn’t help myself I HAD to do the Italian GP after watching it. Ugh. I’m still crying over Pierre <3

That night was just the latest in a long line of many that Charles couldn’t sleep, no matter how hard he tried. He couldn’t believe that his own team thought about him like that. It just put things into a whole new perspective. A worse one. One where he was even more convinced that the entire world was against him now. Anyone. Everyone.He just kept checking his phone every half hour or so. Looking at his messages, scrolling through twitter, until finally he received a message on WhatsApp that instantly made him blush. ‘’I can see you’re awake, Charlie. Go sleep.’’ Max sent him. Charles just groaned at that. He knew he should’ve turned his privacy settings on. Then again, he also wanted to see those things for Max, and that would mean he couldn’t so…

He thought it about for a moment, before he finally just texted his boyfriend back. ‘’I want to sleep, but I can’t. As usual.’’ He replied. It took about 5 seconds, before Max was video calling him. With a pout, Charles picked up. ‘’If you’re just calling me to tell me off then I’m hanging up right now.’’ He told Max, who chuckled softly in reply. The Dutchman looked to be in bed too, but it was hard to see given the bad lighting. At least Charles had had the foresight to turn on the lights.

‘’Don’t worry, babe.’’ Max replied with a soft smile. ‘’I just wanted to call you because I know that when you can’t sleep it means that you’re thinking about something…and I want to help you deal with that. So talk to me.’’ Charles debated it in his head for a moment. He still really didn’t want to tell Max, but on the other hand…he was still his rock. He was the one who always helped Charles when he was having his bad thoughts, helped to get them out of his head so that he could actually sleep. If there was anyone in the world who could help him, it was Max, right? 

It was a really hard decision. He really didn’t want to put all of his problems on Max’s shoulders, especially given that he was already dealing with so much internal and external pain of his own. But he was just so, so tired of the struggle and the fighting, and he just wanted to sleep so very badly. ‘’I…I overheard something today, Maxy.’’ He finally said quietly. ‘’And I didn’t want to tell you because I didn’t want you to worry over me but…I can’t stop thinking about it.’’ He swallowed thickly again, while Max sighed softly. ‘’Charlie…you know you can tell me anything. I will always help you, no matter what it is. Will you please share with me?’’

Charles nodded softly in response and closed his eyes for a second to gather his courage, before he finally started to speak. ‘’When I was with the team earlier today I heard some guys talk about us, about me, while they didn’t know that I was there. They…called me disgusting. A faggot. Said that the crash was a punishment by god or me getting emotional because they heard that you wanted to break up with me.’’ He cursed under his breath as he could hear his own voice breaking, the pain of it soaking into every word he spoke. ‘’And…I didn’t fucking do anything, Maxy. I didn’t confront them, I didn’t speak up I just…I felt so sick that I had to run off and throw up.’’ He started to fully cry then, the tears one by one dropping onto his pillow as they rolled off his cheek.

Charles was on his side, and he curled himself up even smaller as he quietly sobbed, unable to even look at Max. He had to be so angry, so disappointed with him for not saying anything sooner. For hiding this from him until now even though it was eating away at him from the inside. ‘’That’s how they think about me, Maxy. My own team. I…I can’t even imagine how the rest of the world looks at me now.’’ He was nearly inconsolable, and he finally looked up to see Max wiping away the tears from his own cheeks.

‘’Fuck…Charlie.’’ The Dutchman said quietly, clearing his throat a little to get his voice back. ‘’I am so sorry you had to go through that. That’s absolutely fucking terrible…Fuck, I wish I could just hold you.’’ He said and sighed deeply. He really wasn’t mad that Charles hadn’t told him before. He was just worried that Charles wasn’t sharing everything anymore. ‘’It’s so unfair that you’re being treated like that. You are the kindest, sweetest, most thoughtful person I have ever met and it’s bullshit that other people talk you down. Fuck I just want to come over there and beat them up. Do you know who are they are, gorgeous?’’ He was being extremely gentle with Charles, and the Monegasque knew it. Still, it was very much appreciated, and just what he needed from Max.

‘’Thank you, Maxy.’’ Charles said quietly in response, wiping some more tears away as he sniffled a little. ‘’Sorry I’m getting so emotional. It just…it really hurts, you know?’’ He said, to which Max nodded softly. ‘’I know, love. That’s why I don’t read anything or really give anyone the chance to say something bad. About me or you. Because if they dare to badmouth you I WILL cut them.’’ That made Charles giggle a little, and he shook his head. ‘’You are ridiculous. And I love you so much.’’ He told the Dutchman, who smiled in response. ‘’I love you too, gorgeous.’’

Max let out a long sigh then and kept looking lovingly at his boyfriend, even when he looked this sad and broken. ‘’Did it help to get it off your chest, Charlie?’’ He asked the Monegasque, who nodded slightly. ‘’A little bit.’’ He admitted. ‘’But it still hurts to think about it.’’ Max nodded softly at that. ‘’That seems reasonable.’’ He told his boyfriend. ‘’How about we make a deal that the next time you hear something like that, you at least find out who they are so that we can do something about it? Confronting them may be a little scary, but those people are an exception to the rule Charles. A very, very bad exception and we need to expose that as soon as we can. Because the problem here isn’t you, it’s their outdated and bullshit mind-set. If they can hurt you, they can and will hurt other people, who might not be as strong and courageous as my beautiful boyfriend.’’

Charles couldn’t help but smile then, and he hid his face in his pillow for a moment as he blushed. ‘’Maxy, stop it!’’ He called out, but couldn’t help laughing a little as he turned back to face the camera. ‘’Have I told you before that you genuinely are the best boyfriend in the entire world and that I wouldn’t know what to do if I didn’t have you to take care of me when I feel bad?’’ Max just smiled brightly at the question and nodded. ‘’You have told me that. Several times in fact. But it still feels special and amazing to hear, so thank you, babe.’’

Charles hummed softly then. He really did feel a lot better after talking to Max, and he was so relieved that the Dutchman wasn’t actually angry he had hidden it from him. ‘’So…why are you still up at this hour? Shouldn’t you be resting and healing?’’ He asked Max, whose turn it was to sigh and pout. ‘’Everything hurts.’’ He complained. ‘’And I know that’s part of the healing process and all that bullshit, but I think that should mean it starts to hurt less, not more. It’s bullshit.’’ It was Charles’ turn to chuckle a little at his boyfriend and he hummed softly. ‘’You really just miss having your strong and handsome boyfriend next to you to hold you while you sleep, don’t you?’’

Max let out the tiniest little needy noise, and nodded softly as he continued to pout at Charles. ‘’That’s because your kisses are magic and painkilling. I have told you this before, Charlie.’’ He complained with a deep sigh. ‘’And it’s fucking unfair that I have to make do without them for so long.’’ Charles hummed softly at that and let out another sigh of his own. ‘’Don’t you make me feel extra guilty for leaving you, Max. I already feel more than fucking guilty enough with everyone around me here reminding me every 5 seconds that I am that one that put you in the hospital to begin with.’’

‘’But I told you before that that wasn’t your fault, Charlie. I was just saying that I-‘’ Max said, cut off by Charles mid-sentence. ‘’Can we just drop it, please? I know how you feel about it, Max. Everyone here just feels differently.” He said, sounding almost a little aggressive. Charles was clearly getting a upset again, and he decided to try and go sleep again before he did something stupid. ‘’I…I can feel myself getting a little tired now. I’ll talk to you again tomorrow, okay?’’ He told Max, who was still a little taken aback from Charles’ intense reaction. ‘’I-I…Yeah. Goodnight, Charlie. I love you.’’ He said. ‘’Love you too.’’ Charles replied, before he ended the call.

Thankfully, sleep came a little easier to Charles after his talk with Max. His mind had been somewhat put at ease, and he finally fell into a deep, much needed sleep. The opposite was true for Max. He was only more worried after their brief talk, and the pain still remained. He laid awake for pretty much the rest of the night, thinking about how it was possible for anyone to think of Charles the way those Ferrari people had done. It just made no sense at all, at least not to Max. Charles was the most incredible person in the world. How could you possible hate him? He finally fell asleep around sunrise, but even then he remained restless.

The media day turned out to be absolute hell for Charles. Again, all journalists had been instructed not to ask Charles about his relationship with Max, and that he wouldn’t say a word on his boyfriend’s current health situation, but that didn’t make it much better. All day long, he was bombarded with questions about the accident. Whether he took blame, whether he had been super frustrated with his performance beforehand, if he acted differently because of his relationship with Max, etc. It took a real toll on Charles, and in addition to the questions about the still terrible pace of his Ferrari, it meant that he was exhausted by the end of the day. 

He did talk with Max that evening, but when his amazing boyfriend saw just how sleepy he was, he told Charles to just go to bed and they ended the call there. Friday really wasn’t much better for Charles, albeit for very different reasons than Thursday. The car was proving to be absolute and utter shit once again, and there was just no fixing it. Still, it was a marginally better day, given that he didn’t actually have to talk to any journalists and could just focus on trying to improve his red garbage truck. Seb would be doing media duties that day for the both of them.

Qualifying on Saturday proved to be a challenge. Charles finally managed to qualify himself in 13th, but that was really all the speed that was possibly in the car. There just wasn’t anything more, sad as that was. He was pleased to see though that Pierre was doing really well in Max’s car. He had qualified in third after the Mercedes cars and he seemed really fast all weekend. Charles wished the world for his best friend, and it really made him feel a little better that at least he was doing well.

Max reacted a little prickly though, when Charles brought up Pierre doing well. “That should’ve been me out there. They don’t even have their fucking party mode anymore, Charlie. I could’ve fucking been world champion this year.” The Dutchman replied with a long, deep sigh. “It’s all so fucking unfair.” Charles didn’t really know how to respond. He didn’t really want to talk about the accident again, or talk bad about his best friend, so instead he just tried to change the subject. “I’m gonna try for some points tomorrow. Who knows, if it gets really crazy out there I could even win it for the second year in a row.” He said and chuckled a little, not even really believing it himself. He spoke to Max for a little while longer then, before he finally called it a night.

Charles felt nervous the morning of the Grand Prix. He usually did, but today it just felt a little more so than usual, like he had something to prove. He got through all of his normal routines okay, and finally found himself at the paddock, about half an hour before the start. He had just jumped out of his car and was walking back inside to relax for a moment in his room, clearing his head as he always did before the start. Apparently he was slightly too deep in thoughts though, because he bumped into one of Seb’s mechanics on the way. “Oh, sorry.” He quickly apologised, but instead of anything in return, he just got a distasteful look, before the man turned and started to walk away. “Uhm, seriously?” Charles asked. “What the hell was that?” Charles had already pretty much turned his race mode on in his brain, which meant that he was a lot more confrontational than usual.

The man turned back to Charles and looked like he could barely stand to be in the same room as him. “What? You want me to apologize for you running into me? Go prepare for the race.” He told him off, before he turned away again. As he did, Charles could finally hear one last word the man said underneath his breath. Frocio. Faggot. And that set him off. “Are you fucking kidding me?” He called out, giving the man a hard push and nearly sending him tumbling over into a tool rack as he fell to the ground. “Call me that one more time. One more time you absolute piece of shit and I will fucking tear you apart.” He yelled as he looed down at the mechanic. He was immediately pulled back by another couple of guys from his own side of the garage, who tried to calm him down. “Let me fucking go!” He told them. They didn’t though. They pulled Charles back to his own room, where Mattia joined him a minute later.

“What the hell happened out there, Charles? This is completely unacceptable behaviour.” Mattia told him, while Charles just looked at his team principal in shock. “Me?! Mattia he called me a fucking frocio! Am I just supposed to take that?!” Mattia sighed deeply and shook his head. “No, but you’re not supposed to start fighting either. I…” He started, before he checked his watch. “We’ll talk about this some other time. For now Andrea has been sent away. You have to get ready to race, Charles.” Charles took a long deep breath then. Okay. At least the man was gone. That was something. He could work with that. He nodded at Mattia and got back up, grabbing his helmet. “I’m ready.”

Max was absolutely hating this. Over the past few days, his body only started hurting more instead of less, but that was apparently ‘part of the healing process’ or whatever. It was bullshit. On top of that though, he was actually watching a Formula 1 Grand Prix from home, rather than racing in it, for the first time in years. And it was awful. He was aching to be there. To feel the excitement and the adrenaline. To smell the fuel and the burned rubber. To be there on the grid with the man he loved. Instead, he was stuck at home, only able to cheer for Charles from his seat on the couch. 

At first, the race seemed to go reasonably well for Charles. He had a great start again and got up to P11, but it went downhill from there once again. After losing 2 places in the next 5 laps, Seb suddenly retired with a braking issue, which instantly got Max to worry over Charles car. “That fucking Ferrari.” He told his mother. “Everything that can go wrong with that piece of crap actually has.” 

Somehow though, magic started to happen. First, the bad tyre management of his car meant that Charles was forced into an early pit stop, leaving him at the back of the field. However, when Magnussen managed to retire his car at the actual pit entrance, forcing it closed, it meant that the safety car and the string of pitstops that followed it after suddenly left Charles in 5th, with Pierre and his Red Bull in a completely unexpected but very welcome 1st. Everything seemed to go great, things were finally starting to look up for Charles. And then it happened.

He was chasing Giovinazzi through Parabolica, when out of nowhere, the back of the car was just completely gone. Charles tried to correct it, gave his steering wheel a snap to the right to get it back on the racing line, but it was already too late. Going over 200km/h, he flew right over the gravel; and slammed hard into the tyre wall at the edge of the track.

“NO!” Max called out as he saw it happening in the background of the image. The feed immediately switched to a close up of the crash site, and Max could feel his heart pounding as he watched. No. Fuck fuck FUCK. Why wasn’t there any movement? Why was nobody going over there to see if he was okay? “SOMEONE DO SOMETHING!” Max called out, all the images from his own crash flooding back into his head. “No no no. Please Charles. Please be okay. Please…” He said quietly, his eyes tearing up a little as he stared at the screen and could do absolutely nothing but wait for a sign of life from the man he loved.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I warned you! I told you it would get worse and here we are. I hope you’re happy.


	26. Aftermath

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ugh. So I have the WORST headache today, but I still wanted to post a chapter because I love all of you <3
> 
> Hope you enjoy, leave a comment if you do!

As soon as Charles felt the rear of the car just falling away from under him, he knew it was bad. He did his very best to keep his Ferrari on the black, but before he knew it, he was off, heading towards the wall at about 200 kilometres an hour. He had just enough time to take his hand off of the wheel so that the force of the impact wouldn’t break his wrists, before it hit. He could feel the insane amount of g-force as the car instantly came to a complete stop, all the air being forcefully expelled from his lungs.

For a moment, he felt like he couldn’t breathe, and he almost started to panic, before his throat finally opened again and he was able to suck in a deep breath of air. He immediately heard his engineer over the radio, asking if he was okay, but he didn’t answer just yet. He needed a second first, figuring out if anything was hurt or broken on his body, before he finally pressed the radio button. ‘’Yeah…I’m okay. Fuck, I’m sorry guys…’’ He said sadly, before he unbuckled his seatbelt and started to carefully climb out of the car.

Max’s heartbeat just kept increasing as he watched the screen, still not having heard or seen anything from his boyfriend. When the tv feed finally switched to Charles’ on board and he saw movement, the Dutchman could finally breathe again. He found that he had jumped up from the couch in his complete and absolute panic for his boyfriend’s health, and so he really needed Sophie’s help to sit back down again. He was still staring at the screen as he sat back down, and the lack of radio contact from Charles was still worrying him. When the Monegasque finally answered, Max let out another sigh of relief and he swallowed down his panic, before it turned to anger. ‘’THEN ANSWER HIM IMMEDIATELY YOU DICK! DON’T WORRY ME LIKE THAT!’’ He yelled at the screen.

He had been so scared for his boyfriend, and Charles not immediately informing Max specifically that he hadn’t died in a terrible accident was unacceptable. And Max very much planned on telling him so as soon as Charles had access again to a phone. Charles slowly climbed out of the wreckage that used to be his Ferrari and put the steering wheel back in, before he jumped off of the thing and started walking back towards the pits. He could see the red flag being waved, so it was probably fine. He didn’t feel the pain, probably because of all of the adrenaline still shooting through him, but about three steps in, he collapsed down onto the gravel, his left leg suddenly giving out.

‘’Fuck…’’ Charles grumbled, taking a few deep breaths, before he slowly got back up. He still didn’t really feel any pain, but it was nearly impossible to put too much weight on the leg before he’d collapse again. So, he did what any sane person would do. He just continued walking and ignored the fact that he might have an injury. He finally made it to the edge of the actual track, when the pain started coming through a little. He quickly waved over a scooter and jumped on the back, letting it take him back to the pits instead of walking all the way there himself. 

Once he got there, he was immediately taken over to the medical center for a full check-up, given the heavy impact of his crash. They inspected him from top to bottom, making sure he didn’t have a concussion or any other serious injuries, before they finally got to him not really being able to walk on his left leg. They found quickly enough that it wasn’t actually his leg, but that Charles had suffered a bruised hip in the crash. Which really…was practically nothing. They discharged him after that, and told him to get back in on Friday morning so they could determine whether he was fit to race or not.

After thanking the medics, Charles finally left and returned to his garage. He could put some weight on his leg again, but it still looked a little funny as he walked, and Charles hated it, looking weak like this. When he finally got to the garage, he instantly went to his private room and locked himself in. He didn’t want to see anyone. He didn’t want to talk to anyone. Really he just wanted to stay in that room for the foreseeable future, where nobody could tell him how much of an idiot he was or how much he had fucked up again this time. Sadly, it wasn’t long before he heard a knock on the door. ‘’Charles, can I come in? We need to debrief.’’ Xavier, Charles’ race engineer said. The Monegasque let out a long, annoyed sigh, before he finally got up and opened the door, letting the man in. 

Xavier sat down on the couch, while Charles, who had taken the moment of peace to change back into his jeans and team shirt, kept standing against the wall with his arms crossed. ‘’Do we really need to? Everyone could see what went wrong out there! I fucked up. Again.’’ Charles said. Xavier shook his head and sat down on the couch. ‘’It wasn’t your fault, Charles. The rear end of the car just suddenly gave way. There was absolutely nothing you could’ve done to save it.’’ He told his driver, who just shook his head again. ‘’No, that’s not true. I’m sure that I had just been a moment quicker I could’ve s-‘’ He started to complain again, but Xavier interrupted him. ‘’Charles. I’m telling you that the data is saying it wasn’t your fault. You can’t fake data. I mean, I’m fine if you went to tell the media that it was your fault to protect the team from more damage, but it really wasn’t.’’

This just didn’t make any sense to Charles. He had felt a little out of it since before the start of the race, his mind still a little preoccupied with what had happened just before. Then again, if Xavier was sure that the data showed it wasn’t on him, then he really didn’t have any other choice but to trust his own race-engineer. It really just made him more confused as he finally sat down in a chair and rubbed his face for a moment. ‘’I just don’t know anymore, Xavier. Things keep fucking going wrong and I feel like I’m starting to lose it. I fucking risked my life with that stupid move in Spain, I put the man I love in the hospital in Spa and now today I was so out of it by someone in my own team calling me a frocio that I thought I had crashed because of it.’’

Xavier sighed a little as he looked at Charles, unsure of what to tell him. He was a mechanical engineer, not a psychologist. ‘’I don’t know what to tell you, Charles. Spain was a mistake, yes. But Spa and today, not your fault in my expert opinion. You’re really just doing whatever you can to get the team out of this slump, and people should be commending you for that, rather than talking you down.’’ They spoke for a little while longer, doing their regular debrief, before Charles finally decided that he wanted to know how the actual race was playing out. As he walked back out into the garage and checked the tv, he was shocked to find that with only 3 more laps to go, Pierre was still leading. Carlos was only 2 seconds behind, but the Frenchman might actually end up winning this!

Charles watched breathlessly. His own hardship nearly forgotten as he hoped so, so much that Pierre would actually be able to bring this home. His last stint with Red Bull had ended so miserably, and Charles knew that nobody in the world deserved this more than his best friend. As the last lap went, and Pierre went into the final corner, Charles already had tears in his eyes. He was so fucking happy for his friend, so relieved, so proud. He deserved every moment of this and so much more. The pain in his hip was pretty much forgotten as he started making his way to Parc Fermé, and as soon as Pierre had finished celebrating with his mechanics, Charles was around his neck. ‘’YOU DID IT! YOU FUCKING DID IT, MON FRERE!’’ He called excitedly. ‘’I’m so fucking proud of you, Pierre. You’re the best!’’ 

Pierre had to continue on after Charles’ quick celebrations, and the Monegasque settled for watching the podium ceremony from down below. He had to wipe away a tear as he watched Pierre sing along to the Marseillaise, and he really was cheering as loud as anyone else around. Fuck, he was just so incredibly happy for his friend. He didn’t even care about the camera that was nearly shoved in his face, was too distracted to really notice it anyway. He stayed behind to enjoy the moment for a little while longer, before he finally made his way over to the media for his post-race interviews.

The first couple of little interviews went alright. Charles was too distracted to care, really. He just spoke about how he was alright, lied about how the accident was his mistake to save face for the team, and told everyone time and time again how extremely pleased he was for Pierre, and how he more than deserved everything that was coming to him now. When he finally got to Sky Sports though, he got a question that made his stomach turn. ‘’Hi Charles. Can you say anything regarding the rumours that you fought with a Ferrari mechanic over alleged homophobic remarks just before the race?’’ The silence and deer-in-the-headlights look Charles gave really said enough, and it was all people needed to know before his PR lady could pretty much forcefully drag him away from there, all while yelling ‘’No comment.’’

Charles was a little out of it as he was taken away from the interview section. How the fuck did they know about that? How much did they actually know? Had someone leaked anything to the press? About a thousand and one thoughts were shooting through Charles’ mind before he finally ended up in the Ferrari motorhome, with Mattia and people from the PR and HR departments there to try and figure out a way to do some damage control on this. To Charles’ absolute horror, it was HR who finally decided that not a single word would be spoken on this to the press. It was still an ongoing internal matter, and until an investigation had been completed, there was not a word to be shared to the outside world.

That hurt Charles in a way like few things had so far. He felt like the least, the absolute least the team could have done is clarify that there was an ongoing investigation into homophobic slurs being used by a member of the team and that that member had currently been put on administrative leave. It would have been an incredibly clear and much needed bit of support for their supposed number 1 driver. But they wouldn’t even do that. Charles’ management yelled at the Ferrari people for a little while, but they just wouldn’t budge in the slightest. 

In the end, Charles was forced to leave the track in silence. He really felt like it made him look like the bad guy in all of this, and while he had been feeling so happy after witnessing Pierre’s maiden win in F1, Charles had seldom left the track in a worse mood. He was more and more convinced that the entire team was turning on him. If they couldn’t even support him anymore after this kind of abuse, then when were they ever going to behind him again in the future? He felt like there really was almost nobody at the team he could trust anymore, and that in itself made him incredibly sad. It had been his lifelong dream to drive for Ferrari. It had been his papa’s, Jules’. And now it seemed to all be falling apart just like this. Because he had to get into a relationship with Max Verstappen. Fuck, he really did manage to make everything worse for anyone whose life he touched.

It was only when he got back to the hotel that Charles realized that he hadn’t actually turned his phone back on since the crash. There just hadn’t really been the time, nor had there been place for thinking about it in his head on the drive back from the track. It was just so full with all of this shit and he didn’t know how to turn it all off again. He finally did turn his phone back on then, and saw that he had a grand total of 16 missed calls and an absolute ton of messages from Max, demanding to call him back, which instantly made him groan. Oh no. He was in trouble.

Max had been restless from the moment of the crash. He had called and texted Charles time and time and time again, and each time it went straight to voicemail. When the day turned into evening and Max still hadn’t heard a single word from Charles, his worry started to slowly turn into anger. How dare he not even have the decency to call Max and tell him he was okay?! Why did he have to figure that out by watching tv?! It was absolute and utter bullshit and Max was planning on telling Charles just that. When the Monegasque finally called him back, Max had just finished his dinner, and was still sitting grumpily on the couch as his mother watched tv. When he finally saw Charles was calling, Sophie was kind enough to leave the room and give him some privacy, while Max answered the request for a video call.

As soon as he could see Charles on his screen, Max narrowed his eyes. ‘’What the hell took you so long?!’’ He demanded. ‘’I called you 16 times, Charles. SIX. TEEN. TIMES. I was worried sick over you after that crash. I just wanted to know you were okay, and I had to fucking hear it from tv! Do you have any idea how fucking worried you made me by not even moving in that car or replying when they asked if you were okay?!’’ He could feel himself getting a little emotional, and Max had to take a deep breath then. ‘’I’m so relieved that you’re okay, but I’m so angry with you for making me wait this long. You apparently had time to go and fucking celebrate with the guy who drove my car around, but not enough to call your boyfriend back.’’

Charles had to swallow a little as Max ranted at him. Fuck, he already felt so bad about everything that had happened that day, he really could not use the added guilt of all this. ‘’Maxy…I’m sorry.’’ He finally just said quietly. ‘’I…I was busy. I had the medical check-ups and the debrief with the team and then Pierre won and…then the Sky interview happened and all hell broke loose…’’ He winced a little even as he just said it, while Max frowned. ‘’What interview? What happened?’’ He had been so busy calling Charles and being angry with him that he had genuinely missed the entire saga. 

‘’I…you don’t know?’’ Charles asked in complete disbelief. ‘’I…fuck I don’t really want to explain it all again, Maxy. Could you please just go to their website and read it?’’ Charles asked his boyfriend, who nodded softly. He opened another window on his phone and went to the Sky news website, where it was the top news story, naturally; ‘Charles Leclerc fights team member after use of homophobic slur’. ‘’You WHAT?!’’ Max called out, looking wide-eyed back at Charles. ‘’You…he…WHAT?!’’ He asked again, genuinely shocked at this chain of events. ‘’I…when…explain?’’ He stammered, really unsure of how to go about this.

Charles just groaned again. He had really hoped that he wouldn’t have to, but apparently he didn’t really have a choice. ‘’He called me a frocio, Maxy. Italian for…Italian for faggot. And by then I was already so worked up for the race that I told him what I thought of that and shoved him. And he fell to the ground. And I wanted to go on but some guys pulled me away. I…I was just so fucking angry, Maxy.’’ Charles said, before he swallowed thickly. ‘’They put him on leave, but they won’t do anything else to help me. They wouldn’t even put out a statement about what the investigation is about until it’s all over.’’ He let out a long, deep sigh and shook his head. ‘’I just don’t know if there’s anyone in the team I can still trust after the past couple of days…’’ It hurt him to even say it, but it was the genuine truth.

‘’Oh, Charlie…’’ Max just said, his anger dissipating almost as quickly as it had come on earlier. ‘’Fucking hell things are really not letting up for you are they?’’ He asked and sighed deeply. ‘’Fuck I don’t really know how to react to that…I was so angry with you just now, but I don’t feel like that anymore at all. Instead I feel…’’ Max said, looking for the right word to catch all the things that were currently in his head. ‘’Pity?’’ Charles offered as he pouted. The Monegasque knew how this looked. It was just sad. He was just a stupid boy, making mistake after mistake, whose own team had even turned against him just for who he was. Maybe he should just disappear. Then he would stop ruining things. For Max, for his team, for everyone else whose lives he was ruining more and more by just existing.

Max shook his head at that and gave Charles a loving smile instead. ‘’Proud.’’ He offered. ‘’I remember how you felt last night after hearing them talk about you, how you said that you felt when it happened, too. It is such a gigantic step for you to actually confront one of those assholes, Charlie. And I couldn’t be prouder of my amazing boyfriend.’’ Max’s smile only widened when he saw the corners of Charles’ mouth turn up a little, and he hummed softly. ‘’Theeeeere’s my gorgeous boyfriend’s beautiful smile.’’ He said and grinned.

Charles let out another long sigh as he looked at Max and bit his lip. ‘’I want to come back to you.’’ He said quietly, before his face lost the sadness and instead started looking determined. ‘’I…fuck it.’’ Max frowned softly at Charles’ words and hummed softly. ‘’What, babe?’’ He asked. He could see Charles was getting up and going somewhere, and it confused him a little. ‘’What are you doing?’’ Charles looked back at Max with a smile and looked just very excited now. ‘’Fuck them. If they can’t support me, I won’t support them either. Make some room in your bed tonight, Maxy. Because I’m coming home.’’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things. Are. Happening.


	27. Reunited

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So while I know that we're all very horny for angst and drama, I think we could also use a tiny bit of a break. So here's a nice fluff chapter to keep us going. Don't worry though, we'll be back in the angst and drama soon.
> 
> Love you all and as always, please leave a comment if you like it! Thank you!

As soon as Charles had ended his call with Max, he was back on the phone, getting himself a flight back to Belgium as soon as was humanly possible. Thankfully the airports were still working at minimum capacity, so fitting in a flight for Charles could easily be done. The Monegasque had just enough time to change out of his team clothing and into just a nice fitting shirt and some sweatpants, before he headed out with all his things. The hotel had already called for a car to take him back to the airport, so he just had to get in and enjoy the ride. 

As the plane finally took off with Charles in it, the man was still mostly feeling defiant. How fucking dare Ferrari treat him like this. He was their number one, their absolute shining star. They were supposed to stand behind him no matter what, not discard him at the first sign of trouble. Charles felt betrayed. He felt anger and sadness and really he would’ve fully fallen down the well of his own mind again, if there wasn’t that little bright light shining through the darkness. He was on his way back to see Max. Even the thought calmed his racing mind. Max would know what to do, he always did. Max would make it better. Charles had to believe in that.

He found Sophie waiting for him again at the airport and hugged her tightly once he was finally able to. “Max told me what happened.” Sophie said as she gently rubbed Charles’ back. “Know that you’re always welcome here, Charles. With people who love and support you.” She told her son’s boyfriend, before she pulled away with a warm smile. “Come on, let’s go see him. He’s very excited to see you again, too.” She said happily. She helped to carry all of Charles’ luggage back to the car and drove the pair of them home, while Charles mostly sat in silence. He appreciated Sophie a lot, but she wasn’t the one he wanted to see or talk to. That person was still waiting for him at home.

As soon as Sophie stopped the car, Charles was out, grabbing his bags as quickly as he could and rushing inside, which turned out to be a bad idea. He hadn’t made it even five meters before he was on the ground again, his hip once again giving way as he tried to run. ‘’Fuck…’’ He grumbled, pulling a pained face as he got back up and dusted himself off a little. Sophie was quick to rush over, checking Charles to see if he was hurt. ‘’Are you alright?’’ She asked the Monegasque, who nodded a little. ‘’Yeah, as much as I can be.’’ He said and sighed. ‘’Got a little too excited there, I just have to take it easy.’’ He added with a small smile. He picked his things off of the ground and made his way inside then, albeit a little more slowly than before. 

Once he got in the hallway, he pretty much dropped everything back onto the ground again and made his way over to the living room. As soon as he saw him, Max’s face broke into a grin and he lifted himself onto his feet, opening his arms as he took a few steps towards Charles. The Monegasque himself quickly closed the distance and put his hands on Max’s cheeks, kissing him deeply as he felt the Dutchman’s arms finding their way around his waist where they belonged. He kissed Max for what felt like forever and somehow still way too short, before he finally pulled away and just smiled lovingly at him. ‘’Hi…’’ He said quietly. ‘’I missed you.’’

Max both held Charles nice and close and used him to somewhat lean against. He chuckled a little at his boyfriend’s words and continued to grin at him as he pulled away. ‘’I missed you, too. And I am so fucking happy that you’re here with me again.’’ Max said, placing another little kiss on Charles’ lips as he just looked at him. He was so incredibly happy and relieved to have Charles back with him, despite the terrible circumstances. He pulled away a little more to look his boyfriend up and down and hummed softly. ‘’Are you really okay, babe? It looked like a pretty rough crash. You didn’t bang that pretty little head of yours or something?’’ He asked and winked. Max slowly pulled away then and sat back down on the couch, patting the spot next to him for Charles to sit.

Charles watched Max move to and sit back down on the couch and was very pleased to see that it seemed to already be going a lot smoother than when he had left. He took a step towards the couch then himself, and let out a pained groan when he nearly fell down. Again. ‘’Not…entirely okay.’’ Charles groaned, before he let himself pretty much fall down onto the couch next to Max and laid his head down in the Dutchman’s lap. ‘’You’ll take care of me though, right?’’ He asked Max with a cute smile, making him laugh. ‘’I will always take care of you, babe. ‘Cause I love you.’’ He started to gently played with Charles’ hair as his boyfriend laid there with him and moved his other hand down to his boyfriend’s side, moving his sweatpants aside a little so he could take a look at his hip. The giant bruise there made Max wince a little, and he quickly put it away again with a deep sigh, before he just took Charles’ hand and laced their fingers together.

‘’That doesn’t look great, Charlie.’’ Max told his boyfriend. He continued to very gently play with the Monegasque’s fluffy hair and hummed softly. ‘’Does it hurt? You can have one of my painkillers if you need it. I would offer you my boyfriend’s magical painkilling kisses, but I’m hoarding those because I don’t want anyone to steal him from me.’’ Charles just stared at Max for a second, before he started giggling. Max always knew just what to do to cheer him up, and he just still got butterflies in his stomach whenever he was around him. ‘’You’re such an idiot.’’ He told the Dutchman with a bright smile. ‘’I love you.’’ 

Max continued to smile down at Charles and hummed softly. ‘’This is normally the point where I’d lean down and kiss you and maybe make out a little while you sit in my lap, but I have a couple of broken ribs so I’m gonna have to ask you to do all of that work yourself. I’d still love to make out with you if you’re offering though.’’ Charles continued to laugh a little at Max, but did start to move. He had the Dutchman lie down on his back and moved over him, holding himself up so that he wouldn’t put any actual weight on his boyfriend. He smiled down at him then, and placed a little peck on Max’s lips. ‘’Hi there.’’ He said quietly. ‘’Fancy seeing you here.’’

Max just let out a bit of a needy groan at that and wrapped his left arm around Charles’ neck, he still couldn’t lift his right that high. He pulled the Monegasque down just slightly, and stared into his vibrant green eyes. ‘’Will you just fucking kiss me already?’’ He demanded. Charles really did not need to be told twice, and finally closed the distance between them, kissing Max hard and deep and really just making up for the past few days when they were forced apart. They made out for a couple of minutes, before Sophie finally joined them in the living room. She had brought all of Charles’ things upstairs and was finally ready to spend some time with the boys, but was a little shocked at what she found in the living room, with the pair of them making out on the couch. ‘’O-oh…’’ She stammered, blushing a little. ‘’I’ll uh….go…’’ She told them, before she turned around and quickly left.

Max let out a big groan after his mother had left the room and pouted up at his boyfriend, who was looking very caught and embarrassed. ‘’Fuck me. Talk about ruining a mood.’’ Max complained, before he just started to gently stroke Charles’ back again underneath his shirt. ‘’You good, babe?’’ He asked the Monegasque, who still seemed a little shocked from being interrupted like that. ‘’Yeah…’’ Charles said and smiled a little again, coming back to himself. ‘’I’m fine.’’ He added, giving Max another little kiss. ‘’But…maybe we should save the making out for in bed, where we can’t be interrupted…’’ He suggested.

Max just shrugged a little at that and smiled. ‘’Then let’s go to bed. Because I wasn’t finished making out with you yet.’’ He told Charles, who chuckled. ‘’Fine, fine. Were you always this hot for me? Or is this a side-effect of your meds?’’ He asked, raising an eyebrow as he had a playful smile on his face. He climbed off of Max and extended a hand, offering to help the Dutchman up. Max hummed softly in response and shrugged again. ‘’I have always been hot for you. Have you ever looked at yourself?’’ He asked and smiled as he let Charles help him up from the couch. ‘’But yeah, maybe it’s the meds. Because I have so many dirty things in my mind that I want to do with you right now.’’ He added as he pressed another kiss to Charles’ lips.

Charles shook his head on Max and just sighed softly. ‘’You horny idiot.’’ He told his boyfriend, before they started to head upstairs. Max stopped Charles for a moment and walked to the kitchen first, before he finally came back with a happy smile, while Charles just looked a little confused. ‘’Went to tell mom the coast is clear.’’ Max said with a bit of a chuckle, before he took Charles’ arm again and let the Monegasque guide him over to the stairs. Max was actually able to very, very slowly walk upstairs himself by now, but Charles was still constantly ready to catch his boyfriend if he needed to nonetheless.

They finally made it to Max’s bedroom, and the Dutchman turned back around to face Charles. ‘’Can you please help me undress again, Charlie?’’ He asked, earning him a look from the Monegasque. ‘’Maxy…’’ He warned his boyfriend. Max let out a gasp and just looked faux-shocked at his boyfriend. ‘’Charlie I would never try to seduce you while you’re undressing me! And I am actually shocked that you would accuse me of that!’’ Charles just shook his head and smiled fondly, and started to undress Max. He helped the Dutchman out of his shirt, placing a kiss on his collarbone as he did, before he sank down onto his knees.

Charles winced a little as he went down to the ground, his hip giving him some trouble, but he was fine, really. He waited for Max to undo his jeans, before he helped his boyfriend out of them and glanced up while the Dutchman grinned down at him. ‘’Max…’’ He warned again, while Max just put up his most innocent face. ‘’Whaaaaaat. I can’t help it if you being down on your knees for me reminds me of very fun and very sexy times.’’ He told his boyfriend.

Charles just sighed a little and shook his head again. He had Max sit down on the bed and helped him get his socks off, before Charles quickly took care of his own clothes, undressing to his boxers. Max had been fully planning on making a comment about how sexy his boyfriend was as Charles undressed in front of him, but he had to frown a little. The Monegasque had three giant bruises on his body. Two of them were already fading for the most part, but he had the fresh one right on his left hip. It made Max sigh and reach for Charles once he was all done undressing. ‘’I hate seeing you hurt like this.’’ He told his boyfriend. ‘’You’re so unbelievably gorgeous and amazing and you don’t deserve to be in pain.’’ 

Charles simply hummed a little in return and moved over, getting Max to lie down properly and joining him once he was nice and comfy. ‘’That goes for you too, love.’’ He told his boyfriend, giving him another sweet kiss as he laid down on his side, supporting his head on his hand. Max turned his head back to look at Charles and made a little noise. His boyfriend was looking so incredibly good like this. He was only covered by the duvet up to his hips, and so his bare torso was on full display. Charles wasn’t even trying, and he was still doing such things to Max…

Max was only really ripped from his thoughts when Charles waved a hand in front of his face. ‘’Can you tell me what I was just talking about?’’ The Monegasque asked, raising an eyebrow at Max, who blushed slightly. ‘’Uhm…’’ He mumbled, making Charles chuckle. ‘’While I very much appreciate how horny you are for me, we really can’t, babe.’’ He told Max. Nonetheless, he leaned over, kissing his boyfriend as a sort of apology. ‘’I promise you that when your medically allowed to have sex again we’ll do whatever you want. I’m all yours.’’ Just that sentence made Max groan, and he shook his head. ‘’How do you expect me not to get turned on when you say things like that?’’ He complained.

Charles hummed softly at that and finally decided that a little bit of fun probably couldn’t hurt…right? He kissed his boyfriend again and had a little smirk on his face when he pulled away that told Max that he was very much up to no good. ‘’What…?’’ The Dutchman asked. He could feel Charles’ hand slowly tracing shapes on his abs, and he gasped softly when it moved downwards and underneath the waistband of his boxers. ‘’Charlie, wh-‘’ He started to ask, but couldn’t suppress the moan that came out of him when he felt his lover’s fingers wrap around his cock. 

‘’Be quiet now, Maxy.’’ Charles whispered with a smirk. ‘’You wouldn’t want anyone to overhear you now, would you?’’ He asked with a soft hum. He pulled Max’s boxers down fully then, and kissed his boyfriend to keep him quiet as he gave him a quick hand job. He wasn’t about to have sex with Max while he was this injured, but this probably couldn’t hurt, right…? He wasn’t a doctor, and Max seemed to be very horny, so Charles just made an executive decision and did it anyway. 

Max seemed to very, very much enjoy what Charles was doing to him, and it didn’t take him long to come at all. Once he did, Charles quickly snuck to the bathroom to get something to clean up both Max and his own hand with. When he returned, the sight before him made him chuckle. Max was just lying there, still covered in his own cum, with his eyes closed and this satisfied little smile on his face, still very much seeming to be in the moment. ‘’Someone looks like he had fun.’’ Charles noted with a smirk of his own, as he walked back and gently cleaned Max up. He tossed the wet wipe in the bin when he finished and crawled back into bed, where he just laid down again and looked lovingly at his man. 

‘’I had a lot of fun.’’ Max finally replied, opening his eyes and looking back over at Charles. ‘’Fuck, I’m sorry, babe. Come here. I’ll take care of you too.’’ He was quick to say. He had been so preoccupied with Charles finally touching him again that he had completely forgotten to do the same for his boyfriend. ‘’That’s okay.’’ Charles replied with a gentle smile. ‘’I’m alright, babe.’’ He assured Max, leaning over to give him a gentle kiss on his cheek. Really, Charles hadn’t been feeling horny at all. Or…for a little while now. His head just wasn’t in the right mind-set for it. It was so focused on other, bigger things that there wasn’t really space left for his own pleasure. Hadn’t really been for some time. He was just happy that he could still give some to Max. 

It wasn’t soon after that Charles began to yawn, and he snuggled in a little closer to Max. He had been the one holding the Dutchman when they went to sleep ever since the crash, but now he was back where he felt like he belonged. There was this little spot in the crook of Max’s neck where Charles just fit absolutely perfectly, and he could thankfully cuddle against the Dutchman’s good side all he wanted. He snuggled in nice and close, the cold Belgian air meaning that it was nice to warm up together like that, and he sighed happily. He was about to ask Max if it was alright if he went to sleep, but his boyfriend knew him better than that. ‘’Goodnight, Charlie.’’ Max whispered to him as he held him close. ‘’I love you.’’

Charles smiled lovingly at those words and placed a small, sweet, little kiss in Max’s neck, before he allowed himself to start drifting off. ‘’Night, Maxy. Love you too.’’ He whispered, before he was finally completely gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> God, I love them so much. My sweet boys :'(   
> I hate that I will be hurting them again soon.


	28. Goodbye

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't hate me. Please. Don't hate me.

The next couple of days were an absolute rollercoaster of emotions from Charles’ perspective. On the one hand, he was so incredibly happy to be back with Max. His boyfriend was such a calming influence on him. He made Charles smile and laugh, and the Monegasque realized that he hadn’t really done either of those things when being apart from him. At the same time though, Charles was still stuck in this tunnel, and although Max provided instances of much needed sunlight, he still spent most of his time stuck in the darkness. He was almost constantly on the phone, being angry at people from the team who were angry at him for bailing on them all of a sudden.

He finally told them to unequivocally fuck off, and that if they weren’t going to support him when he was abused, he did not feel comfortable coming to the factory to do work there. He ignored their calls from then on, and had his management handle it. He also spent a lot of time on Twitter whenever Max was out for a check-up or to start his physical therapy, which turned out to be a bad idea. Yes, there was support for Charles, and the Monegasque was determined to like every single one of those messages he could find, but the amount of homophobic abuse was just off the charts. By not issuing a statement, the Italian press had latched onto the story and did their very best to make him the bad guy, accusing him of ruining the atmosphere in the team and just being an asshole who fought with everyone.

Then there was Max. His Maxy, who he loved so very, very much. Whenever he returned from one of his therapy sessions, he seemed to be on the verge of tears, having such an incredibly difficult time to bring his body back to health. He was in so much pain, and Charles felt awful for both causing it in the first place, and there being absolutely nothing he could do to make it better. He was nothing but a burden on the man he loved. He didn’t make his life better, he was only ruining it. He found himself crying a couple of times when Max and Sophie were out to these sessions, telling himself that it really would be better for everyone if he was out of their lives. He wouldn’t be able to hurt his Maxy anymore, or have him spend his limited energy at cheering Charles up. He would stop ruining things for his team, or make things harder for the people that still worked so hard to bring Ferrari back to where they belonged. Even for his friends like Pierre, who should be celebrating his win, not calling Charles every day to make sure that he wasn’t falling apart with guilt and despair.

Every time Max came back though, and kissed him, those feelings were pushed aside again in favour of the love and safety he felt being around his boyfriend. Everything was better when the Dutchman was around, and Charles really felt like he was the only thing that was holding him back from falling into the endless void. Inevitably though, it became Wednesday afternoon, and Charles had to fly to Florence for the Tuscan GP of that weekend. He had been a little down all day, despite Max’s attempts to cheer him up, and eventually even he gave up and just settled on cuddling with Charles for as long as he possible could. As they sat together, Charles curled up on the couch against Max’s side, the Dutchman gently playing with his boyfriend’s hair and placing a kiss on his temple. ‘’Just try and relax this weekend, love.’’ He told him quietly. ‘’You have nothing to prove, nothing to make up for. Just be Charles Leclerc, and drive out there like I know you can.’’

Charles didn’t smile in response, and just hummed softly as he cuddled with his boyfriend. ‘’I’ll try…’’ He said quietly, but he didn’t really sound committed at all. His mind was filled with all kinds of other things. About Max, about the team, about the press, and newly, what the hell he was going to get for his mother’s birthday, because Lorenzo had reminded him about the party and he had completely forgotten it was even happening. Which really was just another thing to feel guilty about ‘’It sucks that you can’t come with me next week.’’ He told Max with a deep sigh. ‘’You know how much my mom loves you. I’ll just tell her that whatever present I get her is from the both of us though, okay? And maybe you can call her on her birthday? She’ll enjoy that.’’

Max chuckled a little in response to Charles and pressed another kiss to his temple. ‘’The things you worry about…’’ He noted, before he finally just smiled lovingly. ‘’If it makes you happy, I’ll do anything.’’ He assured the Monegasque. He could see Charles had his thinking face on again, and so Max gently put his finger underneath his boyfriend’s chin, tilting his head upwards so that he could distract him from his thoughts with a kiss. Charles hummed a little against Max’s lips and looked a little confused as he pulled away. ‘’What was that for?’’ He asked, prompting Max to break into a smile and peck his lips. 

‘’It’s because you are incredibly cute when you’re thinking. And also when you’re not. Really it’s just because you are fucking cute and also my boyfriend and I wanted to kiss you.’’ Max said, giving Charles a shrug as he put on an innocent face. Charles laughed at that and just started to kiss Max properly, giving his boyfriend exactly what he wanted. They just lazily kissed for a little while, until Sophie came over and told them it was time for her to take Charles to the airport. They once again said their, almost tearful, goodbyes, after which Charles left to head to the next race.

The race weekend turned out…fine, from a sporting perspective at least. Charles’ hip had started feeling better throughout the week, and thankfully the medical check on Friday wasn’t much of an issue. On Saturday Charles qualified in 11th, one place behind Sebastian, and he brought home a 10th place for the grand total of a single point. It wasn’t incredible by any stretch of the imagination, but given the last couple of weekends, Charles really couldn’t have wished for anything more. No real mistakes, no penalties, just a boring old race without much to do other than bringing it home. How different was is outside of the actual racing though…

As soon as he had gotten to the circuit on Wednesday afternoon, he received an absolute earful from Mattia, who yelled at him until Charles finally snapped and started to yell back in response. He told Mattia exactly what he thought. How Ferrari was being a fucking disgrace. How he had dreamed to drive for this team, and how much it fucking hurt that they wouldn’t stand by him. In the end, neither of them gave an inch, and they left it at that, not really on speaking terms anymore for the rest of the weekend. Charles was just so fucking tired at all of it. He was tired of fighting each and every moment. Tired of losing all of these battles and so very tired of constantly having to look over his shoulder, wondering if someone was going to do something or stab him in the back when he wasn’t paying attention. 

On Wednesday evening, he cried himself to sleep. He just felt so hopeless. About being without Max, his deteriorating position within the team and just…everything that was happening. He just couldn’t take it anymore. It was too much. On Thursday, the only really he really managed to sleep at all was because Max was there on the phone, talking to him and giving his mind some much needed peace and quiet. It was noticeable when people saw him, or at least, Charles believed it to be. He had lost some weight in the past weeks and he found that looked more tired with almost every passing day. He got asked a few times in media sessions how he was feeling, but he just lied his way through it, giving some bullshit story about losing some muscle mass after not being able to train after his crashes or whatever.

When he finally flew back to Belgium on Sunday evening, Charles didn’t feel excited. He wanted to go and see Max, more than he wanted anything else in the world, but he had this constant feeling of dread and panic in his stomach, like something in his brain was telling him not to do this. To run away. That all that would happen once he was there was that Maxy, poor, sweet, incredible Maxy, would have to carry the burden of all of Charles’ problems again. And he couldn’t do that. He just couldn’t do that to his boyfriend, no matter what the Dutchman thought of it himself. This was Charles’ battle to fight, and his alone, and it was so unfair that even in his current, broken state, Charles just kept piling on all of his own problems. Max had more than enough to deal with on his own. He had to get better, and that was all he should be focusing on.

So he wasn’t all that cheerful when he finally got back to Sophie’s house to greet his boyfriend. He kissed him and hugged him and cuddled with him just like normal, but it was more like he was just going through the motions as his mind kept coming back on these thoughts. He loved Max. He loved Max more than anyone else had had ever been with. Or possibly would ever be with. But this wasn’t about him. This was about needing to not hurt Max anymore. Or ever again. As they laid together in bed that night and Charles cuddled close to Max’s side as the Dutchman was asleep already, he started to cry. He had come to the only logical conclusion that remained in his head. It had taken him a while, and he just kept fighting against the thought, but there was no other choice. In order to protect him from Charles and all his pain, he would have to break up with the man he loved. He had to end it with Max, as soon as possible.

Charles was due to fly back to Monaco on Monday evening, so that he would have the time to buy a gift and be present all day for his mother’s birthday on Tuesday. As soon as he woke up that morning, he knew that it was the day. That day would become the worst day of his life. He was going to break up with Max. If anything, Charles had finally learned to lie over the past couple of days. He was keeping up appearances, pretending like he was just a little sad at having to leave Max again so quickly. Really, he was fighting the hardest fight in his mind that he would ever have to face. He KNEW that he needed to break up with Max to protect him, but every fibre of his being was begging him not to. This was the love of his life, and he was throwing it all away.

Max had physical therapy again that afternoon, and was gone for more than an hour. In that time Charles had packed, put all of his bags at the door, and had reserved a taxi to take him to the airport. Sophie would normally do it, but she had to head out on an appointment of her own as soon as she dropped Max back off at home. When Max finally did return home, it was immediately obvious that he was in a lot of pain. He had been pushing himself again, more so than the therapist wanted him to, and he seemed to be pretty much in tears as he sat down on the couch again, his head in his hands. 

Nonetheless, this was the time. It was the only time. If Charles didn’t do this now, he knew that he would never have the courage again to go through with it, and he would be causing Max insufferable pain and heartbreak until the man finally got sick of him. He had to be strong now. He had to go through with it. ‘’Maxy, can we talk?’’ Charles asked as he sat down next to his boyfriend. Max let out a bit of a shaky breath and wiped at his eyes, before he shook his head a little. ‘’Fuck, Charlie. Can we…Can we just talk when you get back on Wednesday or something? Fuck it hurts so much.’’ He said as he cradled his ribs a little, taking slow breaths to try and calm his own body down.

‘’No, it can’t wait…’’ Charles said quietly. He turned to the side a little so that he was properly facing Max, and took a deep breath. Every single fibre of his being, from his head to his toes, was screaming at him that this was the worst thing he would ever do, the worst mistake he would ever make in his life. It caused him to hesitate, just for a moment. ‘’Mom was really sad that you couldn’t be there tomorrow, Maxy. She would’ve loved to have you there.’’ He finally said. He was such a fucking coward. He couldn’t even break up with someone properly. He just had to chicken out. 

Max just huffed at Charles in return. Seriously? Max asked Charles not to go into it, to just give him some time to deal with the pain, and then this was what he decided he so desperately needed to talk to him about. The pain was already making Max a little angry, and Charles bullshitting him like this set him off. ‘’Well I could’ve fucking come with you if you hadn’t crashed into me, Charlie’’ He replied, the way he said Charles’ name just dripping with annoyance. Charles’ breathing stopped for a moment. Max had never, ever blamed him for the accident before. But it…it made total sense. He had just never wanted to hurt Charles, but even he knew that this was the truth. It only strengthened Charles in his logic, and he finally found the courage to say those terrible few words.

‘’I think we need to break up.’’

Max could feel his entire world falling apart and his heart breaking into a million little pieces at the sound of those 7 words. He felt sick, his chest felt tight and it was like a sudden ringing started in his ears. His intense pain was almost instantly completely forgotten as he sat up a little and just stared at Charles, the shock and pain and heartbreak clearly visible in his normally so stoic looking eyes. ‘’W-what…?’’ He asked quietly. ‘’N-no…no Charlie I didn’t mean to say that. I…fuck……don’t do this to me………please.’’ He voice sounded weaker and more broken with every word he said, until he was finally begging Charles at the end.

The Monegasque watched his boyfriend….or ex-boyfriend now, the tears rolling down his own cheeks as he took a deep, shaky breath. He heard the honking of the taxi then, and closed his eyes for a moment as he got up and looked down at Max. ‘’I’m sorry, Maxy…’’ He whispered. He looked like he was about to lean over then to Max, to kiss him. Max was starting to lean forward already, but just then, Charles turned around and nearly ran out of the room. The last thing Max heard was the front door falling shut and the taxi driving off, before he was alone. Truly alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
> 
> My babies :'(


	29. Broken and Alone pt. 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm still sad. Sleeping on it didn't help. Why am I unable to write a story where everyone's happy. Ugh.
> 
> Sidenote: I cannot believe the traction that the last chapter got! The amount of hits and comments and everything is insane and I cannot express how much I love you all. I just started writing this to have a creative outlet during all of *gestures wildly* this, and it is insane to me that you all like it so much. Thank you.

“I think we need to break up.”

The words kept echoing in Max’s mind over and over and over again. This wasn’t happening. It could not be happening. Charles loved him, he would never, could never….a joke! It had to be a joke, right? A really funny joke that he just didn’t understand yet….Max could hear himself breathing shallow and quick, his heart beating insanely fast and his chest feeling almost impossibly tight as he made his way to the hallway. Charles would be there. He’d be standing there and it’d all be a joke and they would laugh together and the Monegasque would kiss him and everything would be just fine. He opened the door and….found it to be completely empty. No. No….this was impossible, it had to be a dream or something, right? A nightmare he could just wake up from. He pinched himself then, but instead of a groan of pain, a small, broken sounding sob came out of his mouth. Charles was gone. He was really gone, and he wasn’t coming back. 

As the reality of things started to finally sink it with Max, he had to hold on to the doorframe to keep himself standing. He let out a broken sob then, and finally allowed himself to start crying. ‘’No…no…’’ He said quietly. ‘’Charles…’’ He had to call him. He just had to call Charles and they could sort all of this out. Max stumbled his way back to the couch, his vision blurred through the tears, and sat down. He grabbed his phone from the coffee table and unlocked it, his hands trembling uncontrollably as he called Charles. He could hear the dial tone. Once…twice…before it went to voicemail. Charles had seen his call, but had declined to answer. ‘’Hi, this is Charles. Leave a message after the tone and I will get back to you.’’ Was all that Max heard from him.

As soon as Max even heard his ex-boyfriend’s voice, he started to sob, heartbroken sounds coming from him as he tried to control his own breathing and get his body to stop panicking. ‘’C-charlie, please….’’ He begged as he recorded his voicemail message. ‘’Please, don’t do this to me…I love you…’’ He stayed silent for a few seconds then as he tried to think of other things to say, but the words just wouldn’t come. He finally just hung up, cradling his phone close as if it was his lifeline as he curled up on the couch and just started to fully cry, letting all of his cropped up emotions out in one go. He body hurt, but his heart was hurting more than his body ever had since the crash.

When Sophie finally returned from her lunch appointment, she found her son on the couch, sobbing horribly. She quickly rushed over to his side and crouched down, gently stroking his hair. “Hey, Maxy. What’s wrong? Are you in pain? Charles will be back on Wednesday, right? It’ll all be fine.” She told her son with a soft hum. Max just let out the most broken little sound Sophie had ever heard from her baby when she mentioned Charles, and it instantly broke her heart. “Oh, sweetheart.” She said, taking his hand and caressing it gently. “Tell mama what’s wrong.” She said quietly.

It took Max a lot of effort, but he finally managed to talk through his tears. “Charles….he…he was about to leave and he wanted to talk to me and….mama he broke up with me.” Sophie’s concerned looking face fell instantly, and she just stared at Max for a little while, completely in shock. “What…?” She asked her son. “But…why? I thought you two were doing so well. I thought that you loved each other…” She told Max, feeling terrible for him. “Oh, sweetheart, I’m so sorry.”

Max wiped a little at his cheeks and shook his head as he kept sniffling. ‘’I thought we did…?’’ He said quietly, although it sounded more like a question. He just didn’t know what was true anymore. He loved Charles. More than anything. But apparently it wasn’t the other way around. ‘’How could he do this to me, mama?’’ He asked Sophie as she sat down on the couch next to him and had Max cuddle close to her. ‘’He knows how much I need him…’’ Sophie held her son close and gently rubbed his arm as she tried her best to comfort him. ‘’I know, sweetheart.’’ She told him. ‘’But I’m here for you not matter what. You can always count on me.’’

They sat together for a little while longer. Sophie did her best to cheer her little boy up a bit, but it was clear that his heart was completely shattered. She ended up ordering Max’s favourite pizza for dinner, but even that didn’t really help. He barely ate at all, and he had stopped crying a little while before. For now, he just sat there, a shadow of the happy boy she had seen just a day before with his boyfriend. Max got up soon after dinner and excused himself, telling Sophie that he was tired before he headed upstairs. 

Sophie looked a little worried at her son, but eventually just let him go, deciding that he probably needed some space. ‘’Okay, sweetie. Goodnight, sleep well.’’ She told him with a small smile. Max finally made his way back up to his bedroom. It took some time and effort to undress himself, his body still hurting, but he eventually managed. He crawled into bed, laid down on the pillow, and then it hit him. He had laid down on Charles’ side of the bed, and the pillow still smelled of his boyfriend. The reminder of Charles opened the floodgates once again, and before he knew it, the entire pillow was wet with tears. 

Max had no idea of time anymore. It all just felt like one big blur. Who knows how long he had been crying. All he knew when he finally managed to stop crying and look outside was that the sun had gone down by then. He looked at his phone again, hoping for a missed call, a message, anything from Charles. But there was nothing. It almost seemed like the Monegasque had just completely disappeared. There were no tweets either, no Instagram pictures, no likes on any platform. It was silent, and yet it was the loudest silence Max had ever heard. 

When his phone finally rang a minute later, he almost had a heart attack. He answered it without looking, his breath trembling as he listened for a voice on the other side. ‘’Charlie…?’’ He asked quietly. ‘’Uhm…I can see how you could confuse us, cause we’re both equally hot and all, but no. It’s Lando. Your best friend. Who you haven’t called in ages because you’ve been so busy with your pretty boyfriend.’’ Lando said, seemingly just happy and cheerful as always and pleased to be talking to Max again. It really had been a while.

Max tried to take a deep breath and internally cursed at himself when it came out again as another sob. ‘’Fuck…’’ He mumbled. He could hear some noises on the other side, which was most likely Lando almost falling off his chair in shock at the things he heard from Max. ‘’Max? Are you crying?’’ The Brit asked, sounding very confused and a little concerned. Max swallowed thickly and took another breath, before he wiped the tears from his eyes. He couldn’t hold in the sniffle before he talked though. ‘’I…no…maybe? Fuck, Lando. I don’t even know what I’m doing anymore.’’ He told his friend as he closed his eyes.

‘’What happened? Did you get hurt again? Did Charles do something? Do I need to kill him? You just tell me, I will go and kill that bastard if he cheated on you or something?’’ Lando instantly offered. ‘’No, don’t do anything to Charles.’’ Max replied. ‘’I love him. I…Fuck…He broke up with me, Lando.’’ He finally said. He really didn’t want to say it, because it still didn’t seem entirely real, but it was the truth. And maybe this way Lando could be of some help, crazy as that sounded. 

‘’HE FUCKING WHAT?!’’ Lando instantly yelled back, so loud that it made Max wince and hold the phone away from his ear for a second. ‘’That absolute fucking bastard! I don’t care if you still love him or whatnot, I am going to kill him. How the fuck could he do that to you?! He is the one that fucking broke you! You have always been there for him, and now that the going gets just a little tough the other way around he just bails on you? No. No fucking way. I’m going to end that asshole!’’ Once Lando finally finished his rant, Max let out a long and deep sigh. ‘’Don’t do that, Lando…’’ He said quietly. 

Lando let out an annoyed noise at that and sighed. ‘’Then what do you want me to do, Max? You’re clearly not alright or taking this well. And you still love him, you just said so. You want me to go to his place and threaten him until he takes you back?’’ Max groaned a little at Lando’s newest proposal and shook his head. ‘’No. If…if he doesn’t want to be with me anymore, that’s his decision. I just…I think I need to be alone for a little while.’’ Max replied, swallowing thickly again. ‘’Thank you for calling mate, but I’m really tired. Can we talk more some other time?’’

Lando was quick to agree with Max and sighed again. ‘’I’ll be in Belgium visiting family next week. Call me if you want me to come over, yeah? I’ll drop everything for you.’’ Max nodded softly at that and told the Brit that he was a great friend, before they finally ended the call. Max cried himself to sleep that night. In fact, he cried himself to sleep for the next few days as well. The days went on, and he still hadn’t heard a single word from Charles. There was still 0 presence on social media, too.

It was Sunday by now, and a full 6 days after Charles had originally broken up with him. Max’s initial sadness had made way for quiet. He spent entire days in bed, just curled up and wallowing in his own thoughts, and only got out when his mother forced him to go to physical therapy. His entire motivation for getting better was gone, too. Racing would mean seeing Charles, and Max genuinely didn’t know if he could handle that. He still called his ex every single day, just to hear his voice on the voicemail message. At times, it felt like it was the only thing that was still keeping him going. 

It was towards the end of the afternoon when Max heard the stairs. He knew what was coming, so he pulled the duvet over the top of his head. His mom came to see him a couple of times a day, but he just didn’t want to talk to anyone. He just wanted to be alone and sad and heartbroken. He groaned a little when he heard his door swinging open and the drapes being opened to let in some light. ‘’Jesus Christ it smells in here. When’s the last time you took a shower?’’ A familiar British voice asked. With a deep frown, Max removed the duvet from his face and squinted for a second against the light, before his view focused on Lando.

‘’What the fuck are you doing here…?’’ Max finally mumbled, which just caused Lando to start laughing. ‘’Hi to you too, Max!’’ He said, sitting down on the bed next to his friend and staring down at him. ‘’I’m here because you my friend are heartbroken and depressed and you desperately need a Lando to get you out of this slump. And I don’t know if you read, I’m guessing you didn’t cause you haven’t read my messages either, but the season has been cancelled again. Too many infections. So I have all the time in the world to fix you!’’ Max had just been giving Lando an annoyed look. He hadn’t asked him over, didn’t really want him to either. He didn’t want this excitable, fun presence in his life. He just wanted to stay in bed all day and cry over Charles’ voicemail.

As soon as Lando mentioned the season being cancelled because of new infections though, his look changed to worry. ‘’What? Who? Charlie?’’ He asked, instantly panicking a little as the thought of Charles being ill and alone crossed his mind. Lando rolled his eyes a little on Max and shook his head. ‘’Will you stop panicking. No. It’s a couple of mechanics from different teams. They’re pretty much all asymptomatic, but people didn’t want to take any chances and so they cancelled the season.’’ Max let out a relieved breath at that and let his head fall back onto the pillow, which, much to Max sadness, had started to smell less and less like Charles as the week went on.

‘’Have you heard anything from him?’’ He asked Lando then, who hummed softly. ‘’No…’’ He admitted with a bit of a sigh. ‘’I got into contact with Pierre and asked him a couple of times about it, but he has trouble reaching Charles, too. He just said he’d spoken to him once on Monday evening and that he was in tears then, but he hasn’t heard anything since. He’s supposed to be heading over there tomorrow to check up on him, so maybe I’ll know more then or in a couple of days.’’ The Brit explained. ‘’But...really…maybe you should start trying to get over him, Max. If he doesn’t want to be with anymore, you can’t force him.’’

‘’I just want to know why…’’ Max said quietly. ‘’I still don’t understand why he broke up with me, Lando. We were doing so well. Or…I thought we were.’’ He sighed again and curled himself up a little further, before Lando shook his head. ‘’Nope. You have been in bed more than long enough. You are going to drag your ass out of bed, and you’re gonna spend an evening with your best friend, because he came all the way to see you.’’ He demanded, pulling the duvet completely off of Max. ‘’And you’re also gonna get dressed…’’ He added, quickly getting up and going through Max’s closet to find him some loose fitting clothes. 

Max let out a long, deep sigh. He did not have the energy to fight this, not even a little bit, and so he just got out of bed and put on the clothes Lando handed him. He would play ball, he just wouldn’t like it. They spent the evening together, and Lando even managed to make Max smile and forget Charles for a few short moments. Which in and of itself was a giant step in the right direction. He went back to his family when it got pretty late, and promised Max that he would be there again for him whenever he needed him to be. 

It was a couple of days later when Lando’s phone rang, and it showed Pierre as the caller. He instantly answered, hoping the Frenchman had been able to reach Charles and could give him some more information on what the fuck the Monegasque was doing with his life. ‘’Hey, Pierre. Got anything for me?’’ He asked the Frenchman, who just sighed in return. ‘’Hi, Lando. Yeah, I do. This is going to take a while…’’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why is this chapter called part 1? Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm *Sherlock Holmes intensifies*


	30. Broken and Alone pt. 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The longest chapter of the fic so far. And oh my god did it hurt to write. I have such a headache now I need to sleep for a week. Hope you enjoy though :D
> 
> Thank you so much for all your comments by the way! I love them, even if you're discussing directions for the story that I hadn't been planning on ;)

‘’I think we need to break up.’’

Just saying those words felt absolutely terrible. Charles could already feel his eyes filling up with tears as he said them, and he had to bite his lip to stop himself from sobbing immediately. He could see Max starting to fall apart in front of him, and he was almost grateful when he heard the honking of the taxi. He hesitated for a single moment, had started leaning over towards Max for a kiss goodbye almost on instinct, but he managed to just stop himself. He got up then, and, knowing that he would break completely if he said even a single word, finally just turned around and walked away from the man he loved without so much as a goodbye.

He got to the hallway and grabbed his bags then, carrying them outside. God, he had never been so thankful for the rain. At least it meant that the taxi driver wouldn’t be able to tell just how much he was crying as he walked outside. He put his things in the car once he got to it and got in himself, sitting in the back where he tried desperately to hold himself somewhat together. He managed to reaffirm to the driver that he wanted to go to the airport, but as soon as the car started and drove off, Charles fell apart completely, sobbing silently as he held his head in his hands.

What had he done? Sitting in that house was the absolute love of his life, and he had just broken his heart. He was an idiot. He was a complete and utter moron. He was just the dumbest person in the entire world. And still…that little voice in the back of his head told him that he did the right thing. He would only have kept hurting Max, until the Dutchman would have no other choice than to hate him for it. He couldn’t do that to the man he loved, and so he had to rip the Band-Aid of in one go. Charles was fighting a battle with his own mind, and the way things looked now, it seemed like he had lost it.

When they finally got to the airport, Charles was incredibly pleased that he didn’t have to go through the entire hassle of check in and all that. He had a private plane lined up, so once he was able to hold the back tears for at least a moment again, he let the staff guide him through the airport and to his plane. He could just wait inside for a moment as the pilots got everything ready for departure. The flight itself to Nice seemed pretty much endless. Charles was all alone with his thoughts and he just couldn’t stop crying. He missed Max so much already, and it started to finally sink in that he would never spend another night in the man’s arms.

He would never again be able to kiss Max, or just hug him, or just spend a nice night with him on the couch or in bed, watching a nostalgic movie together. Charles heard himself crying before he even realised that it was happening. He didn’t really feel anything anymore, almost like a stranger in his own body. He felt so alone, so angry with himself for what he’d done. He curled himself up in his chair and just stared out of the window for the rest of the flight, as the tears just kept rolling down his face. When he finally landed in Nice, Charles knew that Lorenzo would be waiting there to take him home. The only problem would be to actually face his brother.

The two hours in the plane that he had spent crying and drowning in self-pity had exhausted him and pretty much made him run out of tears, or so it felt. He was sure he looked like absolute hell too, but he didn’t really care at this point, he just wanted to go home. He got his things and managed to say a quick thank you to the crew of the plane, before he went on his way, trying to find Lorenzo at the pick-up area of the airport. It was busier than Charles had counted on though, and he couldn’t actually seem to find his brother. It was then that he finally grabbed his phone, to see if he had received a call or something from Lorenzo while he was stuck in the air, telling him where to meet him.

When Charles finally turned the flight mode of his phone off though, his chest almost instantly felt tight again, and he nearly started to cry in public. ‘6 missed calls: Max Verstappen <3’ his phone said, but it was the message underneath that got him even more ‘1 new voicemail: Max Verstappen <3’ Charles suddenly felt like they were way too many people around him. Like he couldn’t breathe anymore. He dropped his bags on the ground and was about to crouch down to just try and get away when a pair of arms suddenly wrapped around him and took him into a tight hug. 

‘’Hey, calm down. Try to relax, Charles.’’ A familiar voice filled his ears, and Charles actually needed a second before he realized that Lorenzo had found him. He let himself lean against his brother then, his breathing laboured as his throat still felt tight and he desperately tried to fill his lungs with air again. Lorenzo held him, listening to Charles’ breathing and only pulling away when his brother had calmed down a little. He put his hands on Charles’ face then, looking into his eyes with a reassuring smile. ‘’You okay there, big guy?’’ He asked, to which Charles nodded softly. 

Lorenzo’s smile widened when he got the okay from Charles and hugged his brother again then, letting out a pleased sigh. ‘’Had me worried there for a second, Charles. You looked like you were about to faint.’’ He told him as he pulled away from the hug and picked up his little brother’s bags. He saw Charles was about to answer him, but shook his head then. ‘’No. In the car. Let’s keep it between us.’’ It was only a minute or so walk to the car, but Lorenzo kept a close eyes on Charles on the way, and only really relaxed when he had started the drive back to Monaco. ‘’So….what’s wrong?’’

Charles let out a long, deep sigh as he considered where to even begin. So much had happened, and Charles was pretty sure that if he were to tell Lorenzo the whole truth, his brother would 100% think he was crazy. So he decided to just keep it as general as possible. ‘’I broke up with Max…’’ He finally said quietly. That news hit Lorenzo so hard that the car suddenly lurched to the side, and he had a very angry looking driver on the other side of the road before he got it back in the right direction. Once his initial shock had waned though, he glanced at Charles in disbelief. ‘’I…really?’’ He asked quietly, his brother’s entire demeanour telling him more than enough. ‘’Why…? You seemed so happy.’’

The entirety of the Leclerc family had been worried about Charles after the lockdown started. He had been so incredibly down and they had feared he was getting depressed. It all changed when Max came into his life though. It was like night and day, and none of them had ever seen their Charles happier. So this was, to say the least, a bit of a shock. He was still his brother though, and so Lorenzo would support his decision no matter what.

Charles sighed again in response to his brother and finally just shrugged. ‘’It didn’t work anymore…’’ He mumbled. He took out his phone then as a way of telling Lorenzo that he didn’t want to talk about it anymore, but his own body was working against him once again. He took one glance at his phone, and at just seeing Max’s name light up on the screen, he started to cry again, letting out a sob as he pulled his legs in and made himself small in the seat.

Lorenzo sent a concerned glance Charles’ way and reached out, giving him a gentle pat on the knee just to remind his brother that he was there and supporting him. ‘’Talk to me if you need to, okay Charles?’’ He offered. He had been through his own share of break-ups, and he knew it was never easy. He also didn’t want to push his brother though, especially not after all that he had been through with Max lately. Surely he hadn’t taken this decision lightly, and even though they all loved Max, this was Charles’ choice to make.

They finally got back to Charles’ apartment building after about half an hour, and Lorenzo parked his car there. Charles had been silently crying for the rest of the drive, and he was worried about his little brother. ‘’I’m coming inside with you.’’ He told his brother, who just nodded a little and got out of the car. Lorenzo carried Charles’ bags up, and put his brother in the living room while he went to make him something to eat. There really wasn’t much, since Charles hadn’t been home in ages, and so he just ended up ordering something that he knew Charles would at least somewhat enjoy. 

Lorenzo finally joined his little brother in the living room and sat down next to him on the couch. ‘’Do you want to talk about it?’’ He asked, to which Charles just shook his head. ‘’No…’’ He said quietly. ‘’I just…Have you ever had the feeling that your head knows it did the right thing, but your heart just won’t stop hurting?’’ Lorenzo let out an amused little noise and smiled at Charles as he reached over and put a hand on his shoulder. ‘’I think that’s what love is, Charles. Your head and your heart constantly fighting. You just have to make sure that the right one wins.’’

Charles wiped at his eyes then and swallowed thickly as he thought about his brother’s words. ‘’I just don’t know anymore.’’ He said quietly. ‘’I knew that I had to break up with Max, but…it hurts so much.’’ He told his brother, before he just moved over to Lorenzo’s side and started crying into him. Lorenzo was quick to wrap his arms around Charles again and gently rubbed his back. ‘’Shhhh, big guy. I know it hurts.’’ He said quietly. ‘’Just know that I am here for you. And so is Arthur, and mama.’’ He told Charles, who gasped then. ‘’Mama’s birthday. I still have to get her a present, we need t-‘’ Lorenzo interrupted him then, shaking his head. ‘’You just need to relax. It’s all taken care of, the three of us got her a very nice necklace. You can pay me back later.’’

They spent the rest of the evening together, with Lorenzo making sure that Charles wasn’t falling into complete despair, but not really pushing him about the break-up either. If Charles wanted to say something, he’d do so on his own. Finally though, Lorenzo had to head back to his own place for the night. He hugged Charles tightly, told him to call him whenever he needed something, and left his brother all by himself.

Charles had never felt more alone. His own apartment felt foreign to him. He hadn’t been there in ages, and the last time he’d been there, it was with Max. His Maxy. His sweet, amazing Maxy. It had now been calling to him in his mind for hours, but he still hadn’t listened to the voicemail the Dutchman had left him. But now that his brother had finally left, he just couldn’t stop himself any longer as he called his voicemail and put it on speaker. ‘’C-charlie, please….Please, don’t do this to me…I love you…’’ Max’s voice said. It went on for about 15 seconds more after, but all Charles could hear were Max’s shallow breaths and sniffles as he cried. Then it went quiet and the voicemail ended.

Charles just stared at his phone for what felt like forever, the tears that he had somehow found once again rolling down his cheeks in silence. He had been so stupid. He had broken Max’s heart, and now there was no way that he could ever make it whole again. He went to shower then, sitting in there on the ground for over an hour until the water turned cold, but even that didn’t help to quiet his racing mind. Pierre called him that night, and Charles cried to him for a good hour, just rambling incoherently, before he was finally so tired that he fell asleep in the middle of their call.

His mother’s birthday was difficult, to say the least. Charles was really trying. He was desperately trying to put on a good face for his mother and not make this about himself, but he just couldn’t. He had barely set foot inside the door when his mother asked after Max, and Charles burst out crying again. He was just lucky that it was only them and his brothers that day, but Charles still felt extremely guilty when he got home that night. He felt like he had ruined his mother’s birthday, and the thoughts about it being better if he was just out of everyone’s lives started to come up once again. 

He locked himself in his apartments for the next few days, only really allowing his mother and brothers in whenever they came to check up on him. Well, there wasn’t much to allow, since they all had their own keys and just came in to clean up for Charles and make food for him and allowed him to talk to them if he wanted to, which he didn’t. Charles just spent all of his time in bed. He barely slept at all, he didn’t eat, he just spent most of his days crying and listening to Max’s voicemail. It had been the most painful decision of his life to walk away from Max, but he just didn’t want to hurt him anymore. That had to count for something, right?

When he heard of the season being cancelled, that really just added to the mountain of despair that was already weighing Charles down. Now he genuinely had nothing left in his life that made him happy. No Maxy, no racing, just emptiness and loneliness. It was all he deserved, really. 

It was ten days since the breakup when there was finally a loud banging on his front door. It was night time already, and Arthur had already come by that day, so Charles was confused as to who it was. ‘’CHARLES. I KNOW YOU’RE IN THERE. OPEN THE DOOR.’’ Pierre called loudly. At first, Charles really didn’t want to. He just wanted to be left alone, where he couldn’t hurt or bother anyone else, but Pierre wouldn’t let up. ‘’Go away! I’m trying to talk to my friend!’’ Charles heard, when apparently someone came and complained to Pierre about being loud. He finally made his way over to the door after that and opened it, letting his best friend in.

When the door opened, Pierre’s face fell, and he just looked at Charles in shock. ‘’My god, what happened to you…?’’ He asked. Charles had a blanket wrapped around himself, and was wearing a loose shirt and sweatpants underneath. What shocked Pierre though, was the way his face looked. Charles looked like he hadn’t slept in a week, with dark bags under his eyes, and his hair looking ropey and untamed. He didn’t look to have eaten anything in that time either. His cheeks had started to fall in a little, and he looked as pale as a ghost. ‘’Mon Dieu.’’ Pierre said again, quickly stepping inside and closing the door behind.

He took Charles into a tight hug after stepping inside, and sighed deeply as he felt how weakly the Monegasque was holding him in return. ‘’Charles…’’ He said quietly as he pulled away and looked at the man. ‘’What are you doing to yourself…?’’ As Pierre asked, Charles’ bottom lip started to tremble a little, and he shook his head with tear filled eyes. ‘’I…I don’t know, Pierre.’’ He said, his voice sounding weak and broken from crying. ‘’I can’t sleep. I’m not hungry, I…I…I just miss him so much.’’ He said quietly, before he just started to cry again, looking absolutely miserable and pathetic.

Pierre quickly took Charles back into his arms and rubbed the Monegasque’s back, hushing him softly. ‘’I’ve got you, Charles. I’m here for you.’’ He assured his best friend. He gently guided Charles over to the couch in the living room and sat down with him. ‘’Can I ask you something?’’ He asked gently, waiting for Charles to get his breath back a little after crying. The Monegasque nodded softly then, wiping his eyes and cheeks with the blanket. ‘’You never told me why you broke up with Max. You…You obviously still want to be with him, otherwise you wouldn’t be taking this so hard. What happened, Charles?’’

Charles just let out a shaky breath. Was he actually going to tell Pierre? He always told Pierre everything, so he was just going to tell him this too, right? Fuck, it was probably a bad idea, but he just had to tell someone. Had to get it out because it was eating him alive. ‘’Everything happened…’’ Charles said quietly. ‘’Fucking everything happened, Pierre. I got together with the love of my life, we were exposed to the world, my entire team started hating on me because of who I am and who I love and then I managed to almost KILL Max. I…I just can’t take it anymore.’’ He let out another shaky breath and pulled his legs in again as he closed his eyes. 

‘’I had to break up with Max.’’ He told Pierre quietly. ‘’I just had to. I…I am only causing him pain and suffering by being with him and around him and I…I just don’t want to hurt him anymore.’’ He added, letting out a broken little sound. ‘’But look what it’s doing to you, Charles…’’ Pierre said quietly. ‘’How I feel doesn’t matter, I just…I don’t want to keep hurting him. I don’t want him to hate me because if I keep doing it he will.’’ The Monegasque said, explaining his insane logic. Pierre listened almost breathlessly to Charles. He finally just reached out, taking his best friend into a hug and just letting him cry against him for a little while. ‘’Oh, Charles.’’ He said quietly. ‘’Why didn’t you tell anyone you felt this way before?’’ He asked his best friend.

Charles held onto Pierre for absolute dear life and shook his head. ‘’I just don’t want to be a bother anymore, Pierre. I…I made you come over here, too. I’m sorry…’’ He said quietly. ‘’Nuh uh.’’ Pierre answered immediately, pulling away to look into Charles’ eyes. ‘’Hey. You stop that. There are all these people out there that love you and you do not have the right to deny them that. And that includes me. I came over here because you are my best friend in the whole world and I care what happens to you. And I’m the one who’s sorry for not coming over sooner when you needed me here.’’ He held Charles tightly again then and rubbed his back, before he sighed deeply.

‘’Max doesn’t for a single moment blame you for what happened at Spa.’’ Pierre said quietly. ‘’It was an accident, Charles. You know that.’’ He finally pulled away from the hug then and sighed deeply as he looked at his friend. ‘’Did you talk to Max about this before you broke up with him?’’ He asked, to which Charles shamefully shook his head, looking down at his feet. ‘’You know why?’’ Pierre asked with a hum. ‘’Because you know damn well that Max would tell you what I am telling you. That he doesn’t blame you for the accident. That he loves to you to the ends of the world and back and that your presence in his life is the best thing he’s ever had. And you know why I know that?’’ He asked.

Charles shook his head again then, looking up at Pierre as he waited for an answer. ‘’Because he tells EVERYONE that.’’ The Frenchman said, before he sighed deeply. Charles swallowed thickly at that and shook his head. ‘’He just thinks that now. But I could hurt him again tomorrow. Or the day after. And sooner or later he would hate me and…I don’t think I could survive that, Pierre…’’ He admitted quietly. Pierre sighed deeply then and nodded softly, getting up from the couch. He understood that he wasn’t going to get through to Charles’ mind today, so he needed to try and work on getting his body back to where it needed to be first. ‘’Alright.’’ He told Charles. ‘’Come on. I’m gonna get you to bed and I will cuddle with you until you fall asleep.’’ He told the Monegasque, almost forcefully dragging him along when he hesitated.

Pierre put Charles to bed and got in next to his best friend, cuddling with him. It seemed to help a lot, because Charles was gone almost instantly, obviously needing someone to ground him so that he could rest. Pierre shook his head then and stared at the ceiling for a little while. He just couldn’t believe how far gone Charles was, and how deep these ideas had rooted themselves into his brain. Like he’d promised a couple of days earlier, he got out of bed then, leaving the room and calling Lando. ‘’Hey, Pierre. Got anything for me?’’ The Brit asked the Frenchman when he picked up, who just sighed in return. ‘’Hi, Lando. Yeah, I do. This is going to take a while…’’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I saw some people discussing songs in yesterday's comments, and I loved that! So if you have any more that fit this chapter, let me know!


	31. Wildfire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Early today with the update!  
> I just woke up this morning with the neeeeed to write. We're heading into the endgame now <3
> 
> Love you all so much, thank you all for reading and as always, feel free to leave a comment, I love each and every one of them.

‘’Hey, Pierre. Got anything for me?’’ Lando asked Pierre when he answered his call, who just sighed in return. ‘’Hi, Lando. Yeah, I do. This is going to take a while…’’ 

The two of them spoke for a little while, and Pierre slowly explained Charles’ entire mindset and thinking to a very shocked Lando. “Jesus H. Christ….Did you have any idea that Charles was in such a bad place?” He asked the Frenchman, who just sighed deeply. “No. I always used to be able to read him like an open book, everyone who knew Charles well could, but he apparently got better at hiding things. I don’t think he even said a word to Max as part of his whole ‘not wanting to be a bother’ thing.” Lando shook his head a little at Charles, before he made his mind up on what to do next. “Alright. I’ll go and talk to Max tomorrow and I’ll let you know what’s next.” Pierre easily agreed to that and assured Lando that he’d be with Charles 24/7 for the foreseeable future so that he could keep an eye on him, before they finally ended their call.

Since it was the middle of the night, Lando didn’t immediately drop everything to go to Max’s. He decided to give his friend one more night of peace…or whatever he could possibly call this, before he’d drop the bomb on Max that really, he was the only person in the entire world that could still save Charles from himself at this point. So he spent the rest of the night with his family, figuring that there was a serious possibility it was the last night he’d spend with them for a little while.

The next morning, Lando headed over to Max immediately after breakfast. He was pleased to see that Pierre was now sending him regular updates on Charles, informing him that he was still sleeping after being put to bed 10 hours earlier. When he got to Sophie’s house, he talked to her for a little while, before he decided it was time for Max to get his ass out of bed. He ran up the stairs to his best friend’s room and threw the door open, opening the curtains as well before he sat down on a chair. “Goooooodmorning, Maxy.” He said happily, earning himself a groan and a middle finger.

Lando gasped and put a hand on his heart, looking incredibly offended. “What?! Is that really any way to treat your best friend in the whole world?” He asked and got up again, walking over and pulling the duvet down from Max’s face. “You go shower and get dressed. There’s something important we need to talk about and I want you focused. So take your shower and brush your teeth and whatever first.” He went back downstairs then, spending some more time just talking with Sophie and making sure there was some breakfast for Max to eat.

The man in question finally joined them just over half an hour later. He looked ready for the day at least, but he still glared a little at Lando for forcing him to get out of bed when he didn’t want to yet. He wished his mother good morning and gave her a hug, before he finally sat down for his breakfast, starting off with some coffee. “So what’s this big, important thing you need to talk to me about? I swear to god if it’s another of your dumb games like Fall Guys or whatever I’ll kick you out of this house….” He told Lando, before taking a sip.

Lando hummed softly in return and sat down across from Max, looking a lot more serious than he usually did. “No. It’s not that. I’ve heard from Charles.” He told Max, who nearly choked on his coffee at Lando’s words. He went into a coughing fit as he put his cup down and had to hold his chest as slowly calmed himself. “Fuck, that hurts…” he mumbled, before he glanced back at the Brit. “What do you mean you’ve heard from him?” He demanded. “Well I mean that Pierre went over there last night to check up on him and support him and after Charles went to sleep he called me to tell me how he is doing.” Lando said, before he sighed deeply.

“Max, he is in a really, really bad place.” The Brit told his friend as he leaned forward a little. “He barely sleeps, he doesn’t eat, he just spends his days crying in bed over you.” Max looked a little more heartbroken than he even had before for a moment, but his expression quickly hardened a little. “Well…he’s the one that broke up with me, so maybe he should’ve thought about this a little sooner.” He told Lando defiantly, making the Brit shake his head. “That’s…kind of the whole point. Were you aware about the feelings Charles had been having about you and your relationship before he ended it?”

Max looked a little confused at Lando and frowned as he shook his head. “I….no? I don’t think so? I mean I know he was still fighting a little with himself about the crash, but I told him about a million times that I don’t blame him. And I know that he was having some serious issues within Ferrari, but that didn’t really translate to us, did it?” He asked, frowning deeper as he thought about it. Ever since the crash, Charles had been seeming more and more down as time went on. But did that really impact things so much? ‘’Up until the moment he broke up with me, I thought we were doing great. He was my rock and I was his. I-I love him…’’

Lando sighed again at Max and shook his head. “I thought so, he did hide it from you, too.” He told his friend. “So, I don’t really know how to put this tactically, so I’m just going to be blunt. Charles broke up with you because he is depressed and hates himself.” Lando said, making Max only frown deeper. “Mate…what the fuck.” He said, getting up and looking angry. “If you’re just here to talk shit about Charles then….” Lando gestured for Max to stay calm then, and for him to sit back down, which the Dutchman finally did.

“This is not coming from me. It’s from Pierre, who talked to Charles for hours last night and got him to finally get everything off his chest.” Lando assured his friend. ‘’But…How could I not have known that he was depressed…?’’ Max asked quietly. ‘’Is that why he broke up with me? Because he knew that I couldn’t help him and that I was a shit boyfriend for not figuring it out sooner…?’’ He swallowed thickly then, trying to imagine the hell Charles had gone through while Max had just mostly been focused on his own recovery.

‘’No…that’s not it either.’’ Lando said with another sigh. ‘’Pierre told me that Charles really broke up with you because he has convinced himself that he destroys everything he touches. That he is toxic. He broke up with you because he loves you so much.’’ Max just stared at Lando for a second. Charles didn’t hate him? Charles still loved him? But…but then… ‘’But he broke my heart…why would would he do that then?’’ Max asked quietly. This whole thing was just so incredibly confusing and difficult to get his head around. Charles broke up with him, but still loved him? That just didn’t make any sense.

‘’Apparently Charles is completely stuck on the crash being his fault, your relationship coming out being his fault and just really…everything being his fault. He has convinced himself that by being with you, he will only keep hurting you over and over again until you finally end up hating him and break up with him. So because he loves you too much to keep doing that to you, he decided to end it. Which means that now he is stuck in Monaco, without the love of his life, and his mind falling into the worst abyss I have ever seen.’’ Lando said, pretty much repeating Pierre word for word. ‘’At least that’s what Pierre told me last night.’’

Max just looked absolutely horrified. That’s why Charles broke up with him? That’s why the Monegasque broke his heart and left him alone like this? He had expected to feel sadness, but instead, Max just felt anger. ‘’That…asshole!’’ He told Lando. ‘’Where the fuck does he get the right to just…do this without talking to me?!’’ He slammed his fist down on the table and seemed very close to starting to throw things around the room. ‘’I fucking love him! I fucking love him and he just decides that I’m not allowed to anymore?! What the FUCK?!’’ He got up then, breathing hard as he smacked the wall with his flat hand and groaned at the shot of pain he felt after. 

Sophie was with Max almost instantly, putting a hand on his shoulder and squeezing gently. ‘’Sweetie, calm down.’’ She said quietly. ‘’Charles is just confused. Very, very confused. Yes he should’ve talked to you about this or…anyone really, but what’s done is done. All that we can do now is look ahead.’’ She guided her son back to the table and sat him back down, before she looked at him. ‘’Do you still love him?’’ She asked Max.

Max had to actually consider the question for a moment. He was feeling so incredibly angry with Charles, but somewhere, deep inside his heart, was a feeling much, much stronger than that. He finally looked back up at his mother and nodded softly. ‘’More than anything.’’ He said quietly, making Sophie smile. ‘’Then I think you know what you have to do.’’ She told her son. Max nodded softly and glanced back at Lando. ‘’I’m gonna go to Monaco.’’ He decided.

He grabbed his phone and was about to call to charter a plane, when his mother cleared her throat. ‘’Max…I know that you want to go over there, but I’m not going to let you fly. You’re in no condition to do so, it’s too dangerous.’’ Max groaned loudly at that and put his phone back down on the table, looking desperately over at Sophie. ‘’But then what the hell am I supposed to do?! I can’t drive yet either, how the hell am I sup-‘’ He started to complain, when Lando interrupted him. ‘’I’ll drive you.’’ He told Max, a pleased smile on his face. ‘’That’s what friends do, right? Besides, I could use a road trip.’’

Max almost let out a sob and almost started to cry as he got up and hugged Lando as tightly as he possibly could without it hurting too much. ‘’Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.’’ He said time and time again, until the Brit finally pulled away and laughed. ‘’You’re welcome. Now. You go pack and get ready, I’m gonna get us a car and pack some things for myself.’’ He told Max, before he quickly left. Sophie helped her son to pack enough to last him at least a couple of days, before she hugged him goodbye when Lando got back to pick him up. ‘’Good luck, sweetie. Know that I love you and I will be there for you whenever you need me.’’ She told him quietly, before she finally let him go.

Max walked outside with his things and rolled his eyes at the extremely new and shiny McLaren that Lando had showed up with. ‘’What?!’’ The Brit called as he saw Max. ‘’This is a perk of the job! I never do road trips, so I’m gonna freaking enjoy myself.’’ Max just hummed in response and managed to fit his things in the tiny luggage compartment, before he joined Lando in the car. ‘’Well, at least it won’t take us too long before we actually get there with a car like this…’’ He told his friend, who chuckled and turned the sat-nav on. ‘’Yeah, it’s only 1.250 kilometres and eleven hours to get there.’’ He replied with a chuckle, before they finally set off.

A little while into their trip, when they had just crossed into Luxembourg, Lando glanced over at Max, who seemed lost in thoughts. ‘’So…what are you actually going to do once we get there?’’ He asked curiously. ‘’You can’t very well barge in there and demand he’s your boyfriend again, right?’’ Max shrugged a little in response. ‘’I…genuinely don’t know. My entire relationship with Charles is based for a large part on feelings and instinct, so…I don’t think I’ll know what I’ll do until I actually get to see him.’’

Max swallowed thickly as he thought about his Charlie being all depressed and alone and looked back at Lando. ‘’Pierre is with him, right? All the time? Charles isn’t alone?’’ He asked, to which the Brit nodded in response. ‘’Yeah, Pierre’s there all the time. He’ll be taking care of Charles until you get there, so don’t you worry about that.’’ Max nodded softly then. He tried not to talk too much about the topic anymore for the rest of the drive, talking about it making him feel way too nervous. Thankfully, Lando was just the best company for that, endlessly entertaining Max by just being his fun and bubbly self.

All in all, the drive took them about 13 hours to complete. They had to stop a couple of times for food and drinks and bathroom breaks, but Lando’s driving meant that they won a lot of that time back. They finally crossed into Monaco around midnight. Lando offered to take Max to his own apartment for the night, so that they could go to Charles’ in the morning, but Max wouldn’t have it. He needed to see Charles and he needed to do so now. Lando gave in easily enough, and followed Max’s directions to Charles’ building. He let Max out there, wished him all the luck in the world, and told him to call him if he needed a pick up, before he left for Max’s apartment, planning on spending the night there himself.

Max himself approached the building then. He gave the doorman a nod when he was recognized and took the elevator to Charles’ floor. He slowly made his way over to his apartment, his nerves raging inside his body and his heart already pounding in his ear as he did. He finally made it to the door and put his key in, letting out a sigh of relief when it still fit. He let himself in then, and found Pierre sitting in the living room by himself, watching some TV.

The Frenchman had already heard the door and got up when he saw Max, walking over and giving him a hug. ‘’Hey.’’ He told Max. ‘’I managed to get him to sleep, but he’s in a really bad place, Max. He won’t eat at all, and he just…I’m not sure how much longer he’ll be able to do this without you…’’ Max nodded at that and hugged Pierre back, taking a deep breath. ‘’Thank you, Pierre. For being here for him and taking care of him.’’ He told the Frenchman, who just smiled. ‘’Of course. Now, go ahead. But be very, very careful with him. He really can’t take much more.’’

Max nodded one last time, before he took a long, deep breath, trying desperately to calm his nerves. He slowly walked over to Charles’ bedroom and gave the door a few knocks, before he finally opened it and stepped inside. 

Charles had been sleeping soundly, Pierre having helped him to calm his thoughts so that he finally could. The knocks on his door woke him up though, and he groaned softly. He heard his door being opened then, and Charles rubbed a little at his eyes, before he finally looked over to see what Pierre wanted from him. Once he did though, he just gasped like he saw a ghost standing at the foot of his bed. ‘’M-maxy…?’’ He asked quietly, his eyes filling with tears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.  
> I need these boys to just TALK and get back together and ALL the fluff.
> 
> This is 100% the song that plays in my mind when Max goes to Charles. It's so incredibly sad and lovely and I'm not crying you're crying:  
> SYML - "Wildfire" - Alternate Version


	32. The Eye of the Storm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They. Finally. Talk. Ugh. I’ve been waiting for this for AGES.
> 
> Love you all! 😘

Max had to do his very best not to freak out when he saw Charles. First of all, because it was actual, real-life, right there, almost able to be touched Charles. It had been almost two weeks since the breakup, and Max was almost getting a little overwhelmed at just seeing his ex-boyfriend. He had had missed him so much, it was impossible to even put it into words. Secondly, Charles looked absolutely horrible. He looked so unbelievably tired, like he hadn’t eaten in a week, and Max was pretty sure that the Monegasque hadn’t shaved himself since the breakup.

His heart broke all over again when he saw Charles in this state, and it somehow only hurt worse when the duvet fell away a little, and Max instantly recognized the hoodie Charles had been sleeping in as one his own that his ex-boyfriend had stolen from him. ‘’Fuck…Charlie…’’ He finally said quietly, his voice thankfully holding up surprisingly well. There was just so much he wanted to say, so much he wanted to do. His anger had pretty much entirely dissipated as soon as he saw the Monegasque and really he just wanted to hold him in his arms again and tell him that everything was going to be alright.

Charles had other plans though. As soon as he finally realized that this Max was real, that he was actually here and not a figment of his own imagination, he started shaking his head. ‘’No, no, nonono…’’ He mumbled to himself, getting up out of bed and stepping towards Max. ‘’You…you just have to get out of here, you can’t be here.’’ He said, finally giving the weakest push against his chest that Max had ever felt as he let out a helpless little sob. ‘’Please Maxy, please. Go. I don’t want to hurt you anymore I...I…I can’t, please just…’’ Charles continued to try and get Max out of the room and only finally gave up and stopped talking when Max’s arms wrapped themselves around him, holding him close. 

The Monegasque just started to cry helplessly then, his head buried in Max’s chest as he was held. ‘’Please go, Maxy. I-I can’t do this…’’ Charles mumbled into Max as he held on to the Dutchman as a lifeline, his own body betraying him once again. ‘’I destroy everything I touch. I ruin everything. I just…I don’t want to hurt you anymore, please.’’ He begged. Max just shook his head and only held Charles closer. The way the Monegasque was clinging on to him hurt a little, but he really could not care less. ‘’I’m not going anywhere, Charlie.’’ He said quietly.

Max slowly turned the two of them around and slowly sat down on the edge of the bed, taking Charles on his lap as he just kept crying. Max could feel his own cheeks getting a little wet as his heart broke for Charles, but he didn’t act on it. He just held Charles close then, very gently rubbing his back as he let the Monegasque cry. ‘’I’m not going anywhere.’’ He again said quietly. ‘’I’m going to stay right here with you, because….because I love you, Charles.’’ Max swallowed thickly then and placed a small kiss on the man’s head. ‘’I love you more than anything else in the world. Any you cannot take that away from me.’’

Charles let out a broken little noise at Max’s words and shook his head again. ‘’But I hurt you, Maxy. I-I nearly killed you and it’s all my fault. Everything is. I made you come out when you didn’t want to. I made you look after me when you were hurt. Everything I do hurts you and…I don’t want to do that to you anymore.’’ He said quietly. He finally looked up at Max then, his eyes bloodshot and red from crying. He just looked so helpless, so hopeless in Max’s arm, and yet the Dutchman still loved this man more than he had loved anyone else in his life.

‘’You should’ve…’’ Max started, but then realized his tone was a little too aggressive. He was still mad about it, but this wasn’t the time. ‘’You should’ve talked to me about it first, Charlie.’’ He said calmly, before he placed a kiss on his ex-boyfriend’s forehead. ‘’Do you know why I’m here?’’ He then asked quietly, looking down at Charles as he waited patiently for an answer. Charles finally did look up at Max and gently shook his head as he wiped at his eyes. 

‘’Well it’s not because you still have my sweaters, even though that one is mine.’’ Max said and hummed softly, but smiled nonetheless. ‘’I am here because I don’t accept that you broke up with me. I am here because I love you and because you love me, and because together, we are going to work through this like we always do. All I need from you Charlie, is that you talk to me.’’ Max said and sighed softly. ‘’I would’ve done whatever I could to help you if I had known you felt this way, but you need to talk to me, okay?’’ He very gently started to play with Charles’ hair then, like he always did when they cuddled together, and he could see the Monegasque relaxing visibly under his touch.

Charles swallowed thickly at Max’s words and sighed deeply. ‘’I don’t know anymore, Maxy. I-I love you so much, but I’m so scared of hurting you again. I’m so scared that you end up hating me. You…you are the love of my life and I don’t think I could cope with that…’’ He admitted quietly. ‘’Shhhhh.’’ Max whispered when Charles finished, placing a kiss on his ex-boyfriend’s temple. ‘’We’re not going to worry about the future. Not now. Not today. We are going to take all of this one day at a time. Just you, just me, one single day at a time. And if that feels like it’s too much to handle, we can take it hour by hour, or minute by minute. As long as it feels doable to you. Does that sound okay?’’

Charles thought for a long, long time about Max’s words, before he finally nodded softly. He still wanted to push Max away, wanted to save him from Charles’ everything, but…Max was here…and he was so amazing…and he felt so much like home…Charles just really did not have the strength to keep fighting it anymore. ‘’Yeah…I think so…’’ He said quietly. He sniffled a little again, and gave Max a tiny smile. Nonetheless, it was the most beautiful sight that Max had ever seen. He gently cupped Charles’ cheek and caressed the Monegasque’s cheekbone with his thumb. ‘’Can I kiss you now, love?’’ He asked, looking into Charles’ eyes as he slowly leaned in. 

It was Charles who finally closed the distance between them and pressed his lips against Max. The kiss itself was nothing special, and the both of them were all wet from crying, but still it was also the most special kiss they had ever shared. Max smiled brightly as he slowly pulled away. ‘’That alone was worth the 13 hour drive with Lando.’’ He said and sighed happily, making Charles look at him a little wide-eyed. ‘’You drove here…?’’ He asked quietly. ‘’That’s…Maxy are you alright?’’ He asked, loosening his iron-grip on Max a little so the Dutchman could breathe and Charles could check him for injuries. Max chuckled softly in return and just sighed happily. ‘’Never been better, Charlie. You?’’ Max asked, making Charles blush a little, which added some much needed colour to his face. ‘’So much better.’’ He said quietly, nuzzling back into Max’s chest.

Max just sat there for a couple of minutes, holding Charles in his arms and giving him little kisses whenever the Monegasque looked up at him. He finally hummed softly and glanced towards the door, biting his lip for a moment. ‘’Do you think you’ll be alright on your own for a minute, love? I just want to go tell Pierre that we’re okay and he can go to bed.’’ A panicked look appeared on Charles’ face for a minute, and he held a little tighter on to Max as he swallowed. ‘’Y-you will come back, right…?’’ He asked quietly.

Max immediately nodded in response and smiled. ‘’Of course, Charlie.’’ He said and gave his boyfriend a sweet kiss. ‘’It’ll just be for a minute and then we’ll spend the whole night together.’’ Charles finally nodded softly in agreement and let Max go. As Max got back onto his feet, Charles crawled back into bed, curling himself up with soft sigh. ‘’Hurry.’’ He told Max, who just chuckled a little. ‘’I’ll try, love.’’ He told his boyfriend, before he left the room and went back to Pierre.

Pierre was still sitting in the living room with the tv on, but was more focused on his phone. He looked up when he heard someone coming and gave Max a small smile when he saw him. ‘’So…?’’ He asked, looking a little nervous. Max smiled back at Pierre and nodded. ‘’We’re good for now.’’ He said and let out a relieved sigh. ‘’Fuck, you weren’t kidding when you said he was in a bad state. My god…’’ Max sat down next to Pierre for a moment so he could explain the situation. ‘’I’m gonna stay with him for the night. Are you okay with taking the guest room? You could also go to my place if you want, but Lando’s there, too.’’ 

Pierre hummed a little in response and thought for a second, before he got up. ‘’You have a guest room too, right?’’ He asked Max. When the Dutchman nodded, Pierre smiled. ‘’I’ll leave you and Charles by yourself then. Privacy might do you some good.’’ Max got back up then too and gave Pierre a hug. ‘’Thanks again for looking after Charles, mate.’’ He told the Frenchman. ‘’Lando is at my place, so he’ll let you in.’’ He gave Pierre the address and directions, before he let the Frenchman out and finally returned back to Charles.

He found Charles in the exact same spot that he’d left him in, staring at the door. He saw the Monegasque let out a relieved sigh when Max came back in, which made the Dutchman hum softly. ‘’I told you I’d be back, love.’’ He told Charles as he undressed himself for bed. Once he was done, he finally crawled in underneath the duvet and opened his arms. ‘’Come here.’’ Charles visibly hesitated for a second. He was still feeling a little unsure about all of this, but finally his heart won from his head and he moved in closer to Max, cuddling back to his side in his normal spot. He couldn’t help the happy little noise that escaped his lips once he did, and Max just smiled lovingly.

He could see that Charles was still feeling a little uneasy, still wanted to say more, but this wasn’t the time. ‘’It’s late, love.’’ Max whispered to his boyfriend. ‘’It’s time to sleep now. We’ll talk in the morning, I promise.’’ He turned the lights off then and just laid there for a little while. Charles had fallen asleep easily enough, his mind as always feeling a lot calmer and more relaxed now that he was really back where he belonged, in Max’s arms. Max finally went to sleep too, unsure how he should feel. He was so, so happy that he had Charles in his arms again, but the Monegasque was clearly so broken that it would be a long time still before they would be back to normal.

When Max woke up the next morning, he was greeted by a pair of green eyes staring at him. Max took a deep breath to wake himself up a bit more and rubbed at his own eyes for a moment, before he finally looked at Charles with a small, lazy smile. ‘’Goodmorning, gorgeous.’’ He whispered. Charles hummed softly in return to Max and just sighed softly as he looked at his boyfriend. ‘’Hi…’’ He said quietly.

God it was early for this, but Charles obviously wasn’t feeling well first thing in the morning, so Max just had to kick himself into gear despite himself. He stretched himself out a little, before he turned somewhat on his side and placed a cute little kiss on Charles’ nose. ‘’Talk to me, Charlie. What’s bothering you? That’s what we agreed last night, remember?’’ Charles hummed softly at that again and looked down a little then, unsure of himself. ‘’I…don’t know. I just thought I would feel happy that you’re here, but…’’

‘’But you don’t?’’ Max asked quietly. Charles shook his head in response and sniffled a little, seeming very close to crying again already because he knew he was supposed to feel happy Max was there. ‘’Shhhhhh.’’ Max whispered, gently lifting Charles’ head again by lifting his chin. ‘’I told you we’d deal with anything, right? I’d much rather you admit this to me now than hide it from me.’’ He said with a loving smile. ‘’Are you sad that I’m here then?’’ He finally asked after Charles had settled down a little. ‘’Angry? Disappointed?’’ He suggested. Charles was quick to shake his head to those and bit his lip a little. ‘’I don’t know…I feel lots of things and I don’t know what to do…’’

Max nodded softly and moved a little closer to Charles so that he could give the Monegasque a kiss. ‘’That’s okay, Charlie. We’re going to make sense of it together, okay?’’ He asked, to which Charles nodded softly. ‘’Alright, can you maybe try and describe which feelings you’re having? Then we can try and find out where they’re coming from.’’ Charles closed his eyes at Max’s question and took his deep breath. ‘’I’m…scared, because I don’t want to hurt you again.’’ He started. ‘’And…angry…but not at you. At myself, because…because I let you win last night…’’ He swallowed thickly then, but continued. ‘’But…I’m happy too, because I love you.’’ He slowly opened his eyes then, and saw his boyfriend smiling brightly at him. 

‘’That’s it, love.’’ Max praised, giving Charles another little kiss. ‘’I’m proud of you. Did that help a little now that you know what you’re feeling?’’ He asked curiously. Charles nodded softly at Max. He visibly looked a little more relaxed now that he was able to make sense of his thoughts. They weren’t just racing anymore, he was actually able to compartmentalize them a little. It really helped, and he almost felt…calm? He still wasn’t sure that he had made the right decision the night before, and the thoughts of anger at himself were still there, but the happiness he felt for having Max there really took centre stage.

He leaned in then, kissing Max deeply and moving a little closer to the man so that they could make out a little. He had missed this so fucking much. To be able to touch Max. To kiss him. To feel the warmth of the man’s skin against his own.

Neither of them had heard the front door, and they were so engrossed in each other now that they didn’t hear it either when Charles’ bedroom door was opened. Smiling happily to himself, Lorenzo stepped in, planning on having his brother eat a nice breakfast for once. ‘’Goodmorning, Charles. I brought your favouri-….Oh my god.’’ He said, nearly dropping the box of pastries on the ground. That was Max. In bed. With Charles. ‘’What?!’’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love these two idiots just so much you guys 😭❤️


	33. I'm not Crazy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I. Love. These. Idiots. And I will protect them with my life.  
> And I'm so happy so many of you like my story too! It's been exactly 1 month today since I started, and I can't believe just HOW MUCH has happened since then. It's insane. Genuinely insane.
> 
> Love you all so much <3

Charles and Max instantly pulled away from each other when Lorenzo started talking. Neither of them had heard the man enter the room, and so they both nearly had a heart attack when they realized someone was standing at the end of the bed. ‘’Fucking hell, Lorenzo. You scared me.’’ Charles said in French, earning himself a disbelieving look from his brother. ‘’I scared you?! You have your ex-boyfriend in your bed!’’ Lorenzo replied in return, giving Max a bit of an unsure look. Max of course didn’t speak French, and so he just look at a little lost at the two brothers. ‘’Uhm…hi?’’ He finally offered.

Charles couldn’t help but chuckle a little at how awkward Max was acting and looked lovingly at his boyfriend for a moment, before he sat up to talk properly with his brother. ‘’Maxy got here last night.’’ He explained to Lorenzo. ‘’He…uh…He came because…’’ He started, but then blushed and looked down at little. He didn’t really want to share all the details about the breakup with his brother. Lorenzo had been incredibly supportive throughout all of it, and Charles didn’t want his older brother to think bad of him. 

Max noticed Charles’ body language and reached out, gently grabbing his boyfriend and pulling him back into his chest. ‘’Would it be okay with you if we join you in the kitchen in a couple of minutes?’’ Max asked Lorenzo, who looked at his little brother for a moment, before finally nodding. ‘’I…yeah, of course. I’ll make us all some coffee.’’ He told Max, before he left the room. When Lorenzo had closed the door again behind him, Max started chuckling, while Charles looked absolutely mortified. ‘’That was so awkward.’’ The Monegasque complained, groaning softly as Max just looked at him entertained. 

‘’Oh come on, babe. It’s fine.’’ Max replied and smiled down at Charles as he held him close. ‘’We were just making out a little, it’s not like we were having sex or something.’’ He added and laughed a little. He kissed Charles again then, getting really into it, a little too much even, before the Monegasque was the one who pulled away. ‘’Maxy, no. Lorenzo’s waiting for us…’’ He said, moving away from his boyfriend and stepping out of bed. ‘’Did you bring any clothes or do you want something of mine?’’ He asked the Dutchman, who only started laughing again.

‘’He asked, while still wearing my hoodie.’’ Max replied, looking very amused. He stepped out of bed himself then and walked over to Charles, giving him another kiss before he went into the closet and got himself some comfy clothes to wear. Charles watched Max get dressed, before he sighed softly. ‘’Maxy…Lorenzo doesn’t know anything about how we broke up before and…I don’t really want him to…’’ He said quietly. Max frowned at that, and once he had pulled his hoodie down over his head, walked back over to Charles, taking his hands in his own. ‘’Why not, Charlie?’’ He asked, feeling a little confused.

‘’Because…because I know how it sounds to other people why I did it and I don’t want my own family to think bad of me. I-I’m not crazy…’’ Max saw that Charles was about to start panicking a little again, and so he took his boyfriend into a hug. ‘’Shhhh, babe. It’s okay. You’re not crazy. You’re just confused, and you need help. And we’re gonna get through it together.’’ He kissed Charles’ cheek as they stood there for a second and finally pulled away with a smile. ‘’Come on, let’s go say hi to your brother.’’

Charles took a deep breath and stilled himself a little, before he finally nodded. ‘’Yeah, I’m ready.’’ He told Max with a small smile. The Dutchman’s took Charles’ hand and placed a small kiss on it, before he finally took him along to the kitchen for breakfast. ‘’You really need to eat, love. You look way too thin.’’ Max noticed with a bit of a sigh. ‘’You will, right?’’ Charles nodded in return. ‘’Yeah. I just…I was never hungry before…But I am now.’’ He told Max with a sweet smile. He was being honest. He had just felt too depressed to eat anything in the days before, but now that Max was back, it was almost like a switched was turned in his head. He was just able to live almost normally again, without crying every five minutes.

Max seemed pleased enough with Charles’ answer and kept holding on to his hand as he walked his boyfriend to the kitchen, where Lorenzo was just finishing the final cup of coffee. An espresso for Charles, and a cappuccino for Max as he was, as Charles had often told him, a weakling. ‘’Thank you Lorenzo.’’ Max told Charles’ brother as he sat down at the breakfast bar. ‘’So…I’m guessing you kind of understood that I went here to win Charles back?’’ He asked the man, who nodded a little. ‘’I mean…that’s part of what I assumed?’’ Lorenzo replied as he put some pastries in both of both Max and Charles. ‘’Eat up.’’ He ordered, having noticed that Max was looking a little skinny, too.

Lorenzo sat there and watched on a little surprised as the both of them ate. Charles had really just not been eating at all for the past couple of days, so this was a giant step, even if it was an unhealthy pastry. ‘’So I don’t want to pry or anything, your relationship is your relationship and private, but are you two back together? Officially?’’ Max looked at Charles then, while the Monegasque just nodded at his brother and took his boyfriend’s hand. ‘’Yes.’’ He told Lorenzo with a small smile. ‘’I…we still have things to work through but…Maxy has convinced me that we can do it together.’’ He said, looking lovingly over at the Dutchman once he finished talking.

‘’Well, that’s really great.’’ Lorenzo said, clearly very happy with this development. ‘’I’m happy you guys are happy. Mom and Arthur’ll be overjoyed, too. They love Max.’’ He said excitedly. Max chuckled at that, and just looked a little awkward at the praise. ‘’I really like all of you too.’’ He told Lorenzo, before he looked back at Charles and leaned over to give him a quick, little kiss. ‘’But you most of all.’’ He told his boyfriend with a wink. ‘’I also finally figured out why I have so few hoodies left.’’ He said to Lorenzo. ‘’Your little brother here is a thief. His entire closet is just filled with my clothes.’’ Charles just shrugged a little like he had done absolutely nothing wrong. ‘’I like your clothes…’’ He said, before he mumbled a little under his breath. ‘’They smell like you…’’

Lorenzo didn’t pick up on those last words, but Max did, and he squeezed Charles’ hand a little, before he continued his breakfast, a pleased little smile on his face. His boyfriend was just the freaking cutest. They spent the rest of breakfast and a little while longer just talking with Lorenzo, until the man finally had to leave for an appointment. Max saw him off, and finally returned to Charles, who seemed to be sitting curled up on the couch as he waited for Max, just looking absolutely adorable. ‘’That went really well.’’ Max commented as he sat down next to his boyfriend and kissed him.

Charles hummed softly in return and kissed Max back, before he just cuddled to his boyfriend’s side with a bit of a sigh. ‘’I guess so…’’ He said quietly. He swallowed thickly now, and gave Max a bit of a worried look. ‘’What do we do now, Maxy…?’’ He asked quietly. Max hummed a little in return and took Charles’ hand, stroking it softly as he smiled. ‘’Well I was thinking we could take a shower together. Since I’ve gotten back I’ve only seen you in my sweater and I’d love to see you out of it, too…’’

Charles frowned a little at that and pulled his hand away, sitting on his own a little as he crossed his legs and his arms. ‘’No, I mean…us…’’ He told Max with a small sigh. ‘’I love you and…I’m willing to try again, at least for a little while, but…I’m still feeling the same, Maxy.’’ He told the Dutchman, looking a little distressed. Ever since Max had come back, Charles had felt so much better, calmer. But he could still quietly hear that little voice in the back of his mind that had pushed him to break up with Max in the first place. It wasn’t gone, it was still there, albeit a lot less loud.

Max let out a long sigh of his own and took Charles’ hand again once the Monegasque allowed it, placing a small kiss on it. ‘’Are you willing to try anything?’’ He asked quietly, looking into Charles’ eyes. He didn’t want to push Charles, not on this. If he was going to try anything to make himself feel better and the way that he deserved to feel, it had to come from himself. Charles finally nodded softly. ‘’Anything if it means that I can be with you…’’ He told Max quietly.

Max smiled at that and leaned over, giving his boyfriend a soft, loving kiss. ‘’Okay.’’ He said quietly. ‘’I think that it would be best for you to go and talk to someone. A professional. Someone that understands how you feel and how you think, but someone that you can trust 100% too and share everything with.’’ Charles’ throat felt a little tight as he listened to Max, and he let out a little sound that indicated that he really wasn’t sure of this idea. ‘’You want me to talk to a therapist…? I-I’m not crazy, Maxy…’’ He said, his eyes watering up a little again already. Fuck, if even Max thought he was crazy there really was no hope left.

‘’Shhhhh.’’ Max quickly said, gently pulling Charles back in until the Monegasque gave in and cuddled back to Max’s chest. ‘’You’re not crazy. Not even close to it. But like we talked about yesterday, you are a little confused, right?’’ Charles listened to Max’s words and blinked away his tears, but didn’t really react to the Dutchman’s words. ‘’I just think that it would help for you to make sense of things. That it would help you be my sweet, beautiful Charlie again, without having to worry about breaking up with me.’’ Max said quietly. He gently rubbed Charles’ back as they cuddled together, until he heard Charles finally take in a deep breath. ‘’Okay…’’ He said quietly.

Max instantly broke into a bright smile when Charles answered and pulled away to give him another kiss. ‘’I love you so much.’’ He told the Monegasque. ‘’And I’m so proud of you already.’’ He added with a pleased sigh. ‘’I’ll make some calls later today and we can find the one you like best.’’ He assured Charles as he started to gently play with his boyfriend’s hair again. ‘’In the meantime, how about we go take that shower, and then we’ll do whatever you want to do.’’ Max suggested, to which Charles easily agreed. His worries had died down a little again, and so he had enough room in his head to be excited for a very naked shower with his boyfriend.

Max took Charles along to the Monegasque’s bathroom then. The Monegasque was quick to undress himself, after which he turned around to look at Max, who, annoyingly, was still fully dressed. The Dutchman frowned a little as he looked at Charles and stepped closer, gently running his fingers over his boyfriend’s sides. ‘’You look so thin, Charlie…’’ He said, sounding concerned. ‘’We really have to get you to eat all the ice cream.’’ He added with a little chuckle. Everything was more than serious enough already, so now that the initial shock of seeing Charles like this had gone away a little, Max decided to keep it light.

Charles let out an actual giggle at Max’s words, not having expected a joke. He hummed softly and kissed his boyfriend, before he smiled as he pulled away. ‘’That’s what I wanna do after this. I wanna cuddle with you underneath a blanket and watch the Lord of the Rings trilogy in one go.’’ He said, looking pretty excited about the prospect. Max just fondly shook his head and kissed Charles again, before he finally stepped back and undressed himself, only groaning a little bit at the pain and effort it took him to do so.

Charles had already turned the water on by then, letting it warm a little before he finally stepped underneath. He hadn’t told Max, but it had been a couple of days since he had last had the will or the energy to shower, and he was a little embarrassed now that he thought about it. He quickly rinsed himself a little and let his hair wash out, before Max stepped in as well. Charles was quick to let the Dutchman join him underneath the hot water, before he wrapped his arms around Max’s waist and tucked his head into the man’s neck with a pleased sigh.

‘’Thank you for forcing me to shower.’’ He mumbled into his boyfriend’s bare shoulder. ‘’Both because I smelled and because this is really nice.’’ Max chuckled softly at that and just pressed a kiss to Charles’ temple as he held him close. ‘’I just know that this is where you usually go when your head is too busy.’’ He said quietly. ‘’I wanted to give you some nice time to unwind a little.’’ Max continued to hold Charles for a couple of minutes, before he slowly pulled away and reached for the shampoo. ‘’Turn around, babe.’’ He told his boyfriend, before he started to gently was Charles’ hair and afterwards his body, just helping the man to relax completely.

Max finally ended up on his knees in front of Charles, which took some effort from the Dutchman. He washed his boyfriend’s legs and placed a small kiss on his thigh, when he noticed Charles was sporting a bit of a semi. ‘’Babe?’’ He asked, looking up at Charles with a curious look. ‘’When’s the last time you came?’’ He asked with a playful smile. ‘’Have you been naughty without me?’’ Charles’ face nearly turned red as Max started talking. Yes, they were together. Yes, they had had sex more times than Charles could reasonably be expected to count and yes, he felt awkward as hell being asked this kind of question.

‘’I-I…I don’t know…’’ He finally said quietly. He wasn’t lying. His libido had pretty much been at its lowest point ever since the crash and he just hadn’t really felt like it in the weeks since. ‘’I think the last time was when we were here in Monaco and I fucked you before we went to Spa…?’’ He said, although it sounded more like a question as it came out. Max couldn’t help but frown at that and got back onto his feet, letting Charles help him up a little. ‘’Really, are you sure?’’ He asked as he gently cupped Charles’ cheek, caressing the cheekbone. When Charles nodded softly, Max kissed the man deeply and hummed against his lips. ‘’Well I think we’ll just have to do something about that then. Get you to relax a little.’’ He whispered as his fingers slowly wrapped themselves around Charles’ cock.

Charles let out a gasp, which turned into a low moan about halfway through. Okay…so maybe his libido hadn’t gone down the drain completely. Maybe he just really, really needed Max to touch him, given by the fact that he was hard in pretty much seconds. He leaned against the man a little, nuzzling into his shoulder as he felt his boyfriend’s hand stroking him and his own hardness against his thigh. Charles was almost instantly turned into a moaning mess against Max, and it wasn’t long before through the moans, he managed to tap Max’s side. ‘’Fuck…Maxy. I…I…fuuuuuuuuck.’’ He moaned, as he came hard between the two of them.

Charles was breathing heavily as he came down from his high, but he wasn’t done yet. He could feel Max was still hard against him, and he just desperately wanted to make his boyfriend feel good, too. So he sank down through his knees, glancing up at Max as he licked his lips a little. Max really only realized what was happening as he looked down at Charles, and moaned in response. ‘’Fuck, babe. Please.’’ He said, making Charles smile. The Monegasque grabbed Max’s cock in his hand and leaned in, about to suck his boyfriend off, when there was a loud banging on the bathroom door. 

‘’OI! YOU TWO FINALLY DONE IN THERE?! YOU DON’T HAVE TO PROVIDE ENTERTAINMENT FOR THE WHOLE BUILDING!’’ Lando yelled, making both Charles’ and Max’s eyes go wide in shock.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I could not resist doing the same thing again, shoot me :P  
> It's only even more awkward this time around :D


	34. Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's a slightly shorter chapter today, but that's mainly because today is SO HOT IN WESTERN EUROPE and I'm dying a little bit. So I didn't really have the energy to write...

‘’OI! YOU TWO FINALLY DONE IN THERE?! YOU DON’T HAVE TO PROVIDE ENTERTAINMENT FOR THE WHOLE BUILDING!’’

Charles immediately pulled away from Max when he heard the yelling, whereas Max just froze completely for a moment. They were silent for a few seconds, before Charles just started laughing, resting his forehead against his boyfriend’s thigh. This whole turn of events was just incredibly funny to him. Max seemed to take it a little differently. He had been incredibly sexually frustrated for a little while now, and Lando cockblocking him was not helping. ‘’FUCK OFF!’’ He yelled in return. ‘’This is our place, we do what we want in here!’’ 

Nonetheless, Max had started to go soft, and he didn’t really feel like doing naughty things with Charles anymore, at least not right at that moment. He looked down at his boyfriend and pushed a hand through his hair with a soft hum. ‘’Do you think we can continue this tonight, love?’’ He asked his boyfriend, giving him a hopeful smile when Charles looked up. The Monegasque couldn’t help but chuckle a little at Max and got back up onto his feet with a playful looking smile. ‘’Maybe. Maybe some other stuff…’’ He said, giving the Dutchman a sweet kiss before he turned the water off. ‘’We should probably…right?’’ He said, gesturing towards leaving the shower.

With an exasperated sigh, Max finally agreed and stepped out of the shower with Charles. He reached for one of the overly expensive, yet incredibly soft towels the Monegasque had laying around and handed one to his boyfriend, before he started to dry himself off, getting back dressed once he’d finished. Finally, Max pressed a kiss to Charles’ lips and took a last, longing look at his lover’s physique, before he pulled away. ‘’I’m gonna go kill Lando. So if you hear screaming, it’s fine.’’ He said, giving Charles a smile before he finally left the bathroom.

‘’LANDO NORRIS.’’ Max yelled as he stormed through the apartment in search of his best friend. He finally found the Brit in the kitchen as he rummaged through the fridge, seemingly without a care in the world. Or a death wish. Max was planning on changing that. With fire in his eyes, Max almost ran towards Lando, smacking him hard on the back of his head. ‘’Why the actual fuck did you do that, you…’’ Max groaned then, balling his fist as he swallowed down a string of curse words that would’ve instantly sent him down to hell.

‘’OUCH!’’ Lando exclaimed, rubbing the back of his head with a bit of a pout as he turned to look at Max. ‘’That hurt! Why would you do that?’’ He asked Max, who, if that were in any way possible, only looked angrier. ‘’Seriously? Fucking seriously Lando?! I haven’t been able to really get anything done with Charles for weeks. WEEKS. And you storm in here uninvited and fucking cockblock me?! You’re lucky that I don’t want to get blood all over my boyfriend’s apartment or I would’ve fucking killed you.’’

Lando just stared at Max for a second or two, before he started laughing, unable to keep it down. ‘’Your face!’’ He let out, almost out of breath as he had to bend over a bit with laughter. He continued to laugh for a full half a minute, before he finally wiped the tears of laughter from his eyes and took a deep breath, still chuckling a little. ‘’Oh god, that’s amazing.’’ He finally said, shaking his head. ‘’Lighten up, Max. At least you have someone to get funky with. Some of us are stuck in our bubbles without a fuckbuddy.’’

Max was still absolutely raging. In fact, Lando laughing at him only made him angrier. He was already lifting his arms a little, debating between pushing the Brit or just giving him a good punch in the stomach, when two arms suddenly wrapped around his waist and pulled back against a very familiar feeling chest. ‘’Maxy, calm down.’’ Charles said as he put his chin down on his boyfriend’s shoulder. ‘’Don’t be rude to our guest.’’ He said, giving Max’s bestie a smile. ‘’Hi Lando. Thanks for bringing this one back to me.’’ He said happily.

Max instantly calmed down when Charles hugged him and just grumbled a little, whereas Lando instantly broke into a bright smile. ‘’See, Maxy.’’ He teased the Dutchman. ‘’This is how you treat your guests. Not by yelling at them, by saying thank you.’’ He looked back to Charles and gave him a nod, rather than a hug. There were still the Covid rules to think about after all. ‘’Anytime, Charles.’’ He said happily. ‘’I dug into your fridge for something to eat by the way. There was *nothing* in Max’s apartment. That place is a hellhole.’’

Charles started to laugh again at Lando and just nodded softly, before he placed a kiss on Max’s cheek with a knowing smile. ‘’I am aware of the state of Maxy’s apartment.’’ He said and kept chuckling a little, while Max frowned deeply. ‘’Why is everyone ganging up on me here? I’m the injured party here. Literally!’’ Both Lando and Charles ended up just laughing at the Dutchman then, and it wasn’t long before Pierre decided to finally join them in the kitchen as well. ‘’Sounds like fun in here.’’ He commented. ‘’Almost as fun as it sounded in that bathroom.’’ He added, giving Charles a wink.

Charles just chuckled a little in return and shrugged. Loving Max was pretty much the one thing in his life that didn’t embarrass him, and it was by far the absolute best thing in it, too. ‘’Well I can’t help it that my man is an absolute legend in the bedroom….and the bathroom, too.’’ He replied Pierre with a grin, making Lando groan very loudly. ‘’Noooooo, don’t put any images like that in my head. I don’t want them.’’ He said, putting a hand in front of his eyes like that would be any help whatsoever. 

‘’Soooo, to change the subject…’’ Pierre said and chuckled a little as he sat down at the breakfast bar. ‘’You guys are back together then for good? Max told me last night things were okay, but…yes?’’ Max was the one to answer this time, and did so by turning his head and giving Charles a loving kiss. ‘’Yes.’’ He finally said, although he was still just staring into Charles’ vibrant green eyes. ‘’I love you.’’ He whispered to the Monegasque, who giggled a little in return. ‘’I love you too, Maxy.’’ Charles replied quietly.

Their beautiful little moment was interrupted, once again, by Lando making gagging noises. ‘’Are you FUCKING kidding me?!’’ Max yelled as he turned his head back to look at his best friend. ‘’I swear to god if you do that one more time I am not responsible for what happens to you.’’ Lando just started laughing at Max again and put a cookie in his mouth before he decided to answer with his actual mouth full. ‘’I dunno. Sounds to me a lot like you will be responsible for it.’’ He mumbled around the food.

Max was about to get angry again and opened his mouth to yell at Lando, but a kiss from Charles on his cheek shut him right back up again. He could hear a cheeky ‘’Oh, someone’s been whipped real good.’’ From Lando, but finally decided not to actually engage in the Brit’s teasing any longer. Instead, he gently pulled away from Charles enough to turn around and wrap his own arms around the man, kissing him for a second before he pulled away completely. ‘’So what’s next for you guys?’’ Pierre asked curiously. ‘’Now that you’re going to stay together after all, are you gonna move in together or something?’’

Max hummed a little at Pierre’s question and finally shrugged a little. ‘’I’m planning on at least staying for a while, or for as long as Charles would like me to. Wouldn’t immediately want to call it moving in together though, that all sounds so super official.’’ He told Pierre, who nodded softly. ‘’Yeah, that sounds about right.’’ He said. He was still a little worried about his best friend, but the heart eyes that Charles was currently giving his boyfriend really told him everything he needed to know. ‘’Right then…’’ He said, getting back up. ‘’I think that it might be about time for Lando and me to head home.’’

Lando frowned a little at Pierre’s suggestion. ‘’What…? Mate, I literally just got here last night!’’ He told the Frenchman, who sighed deeply and shook his head. ‘’I mean…if you want we can do a road trip to Normandy and you can see my place?’’ He suggested, looking at Lando and trying to give him all of the signals he possible could to indicate that really, he just wanted Max and Charles to have all the privacy they could get. ‘’Yeah, sounds fun!’’ The Brit almost instantly replied. He wasn’t really jumping at the chance to go either home or back to Belgium, and so this sounded like a fun alternative.

They spent a little more time at Charles’ place, just all catching up with one another really, even though Max and Charles just had a little more attention for each other than the others. It was a little after noon when Lando and Pierre finally left, and both Max and Charles thanked them profusely for all the help they had been over the last weeks, before finally sending them on their way.

After that, Max took Charles back along to the couch and held the man in his arms as they cuddled together. He noticed Charles was giving him an expectant look, and he hummed softly as he gently ran his fingers up and down his boyfriend’s arm. This wasn’t going to be fun, but it was something he needed to do. ‘’So, babe. One more annoying thing before we can finally dive into our movie marathon…We were going to get you a therapist, remember?’’ The words weren’t even out, before Charles visibly winced and balled himself up a little further in Max’s arms. ‘’Do we really have to…?’’ He asked quietly.

Letting out a long sigh, Max moved his fingers from Charles’ arm to his hair, and started to gently play with the strands as he hummed. ‘’No.’’ He said quietly. ‘’You don’t have to do anything that you don’t want to.’’ He assured his sweet boyfriend. ‘’But we talked about it and we both agreed that it would really help you.’’ He added with a concerned look. ‘’Will you please give it a chance? For me?’’ Charles just let out a long groan at that. Fuck. Why did Max always know just how to play him? ‘’Fiiiiine. For you. Because I love you.’’ He said in a defying tone, still wanting to make sure that Max knew he did this really only because he feared losing Max even more than he feared talking to a therapist.

‘’Alright, babe.’’ Max said and smiled lovingly. He got up then, retrieving Charles’ laptop and taking him through the long list of therapists the rich and famous saw in Monaco. They finally narrowed it down to a couple of names and went through their websites, LinkedIn accounts, learning pretty much all there was to find online, before they decided it came down to three options. ‘’I want the woman.’’ Charles finally decided. ‘’The others are guys and…I dunno. I just have a better feeling about talking to her.’’ He decided. 

Max very easily went along with Charles. He would have been fine with any of the three, but it was absolutely crucial that Charles chose his own therapist and wanted to do this himself. ‘’Alright, love. You want me to call and get you an appointment?’’ Max asked gently, to which Charles nodded. ‘’Yes please.’’ He was going to go. He was! He just…actually calling to make an appointment was extremely terrifying, and if Max was offering to do it anyway…

Max hummed gently in return and kissed Charles’ temple, before he picked up the phone and dialled the number listed on the website. He talked for a moment to the assistant that answered the phone, and after giving her all of Charles’ information and answering the other questions that he had, looked back down at Charles. ‘’Tomorrow at 1, does that work for you, love?’’ He asked the Monegasque, who just stared back at Max with almost comically wide eyes. 

Tomorrow, already? That was. He wasn’t ready. That was way too early. There was absolutely no way that he’d be mentally prepared for that. His mind started to race again, but his thoughts were interrupted when he felt Max’s lips pressed to his forehead. He made a weak little noise and bit down hard on his lip, but finally nodded softly. ‘’Y-yeah…okay.’’ He said quietly. It still terrified him immensely, but if Max was with him, he was pretty sure that he could handle anything, even a therapist.

Max confirmed the appointment with the assistant, before they finally ended the call. As soon as it had ended, Max pretty much threw his phone aside so that he could hold Charles tightly and kiss him deeply. ‘’I am SO proud of you!’’ He told the Monegasque as he pulled away from the kiss with the biggest grin Charles thought he had ever seen on Max. It made him blush a little. ‘’I just…I just agreed to an appointment Maxy…’’ He said quietly, making Max roll his eyes. ‘’Oh shut up you. You just took a giant first step and I have never in my life been prouder of you.’’ He kissed Charles again then, holding him close with a pleased sigh while the Monegasque giggled a little. ‘’Love you too.’’ He told the Dutchman.

They just stayed like that for a little while, both comfortable in the pleasant silence. Finally, Max got up from the couch to get them drinks and snacks, while Charles got the movie started so they wouldn’t have to sit through all of the opening credits and could get right to it. Max finally returned after a little while, carrying with him two smoothies he’d managed to put together, as well as a bucket of ice cream, which he triumphantly showed Charles. ‘’It’s straciatella.’’ He said, making his boyfriend laugh by putting special emphasis on the Italian pronunciation. ‘’I fucking love straciatella. We’re eating ALL of this.’’

Charles just giggled happily to himself and got back into Max’s arms when the man sat down. He was still very nervous for the therapy session the next day, but at least he felt like that day was absolutely perfect as he started the Fellowship of the Ring and dug into his ice cream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!   
> Please leave a comment if you enjoyed the chapter, I love reading them!


	35. Healing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love these boys so much and I just keep writing full chapters even when I'm trying to start wrapping things up <3  
> You're welcome! :p

It was nearing midnight when they finally got to what felt like the 16th and final ending of The Return of the King. Max stretched himself out and let out a long, big yawn before he let his arms fall back down around Charles. ‘’I’m so tired.’’ He mumbled as he nuzzled into his boyfriend’s soft, fluffy hair. They were sitting underneath a comfy blanket, and with Charles in his hoodie sitting so close to him, it was close to the perfect circumstances for Max to fall asleep with. He had been fighting sleep for about an hour now, only the action and loud music coming from the screen keeping him awake. 

Charles had more of an eye for what was happening in the actual movie, and he really only heard Max’s words somewhere in the back of his mind. And so it took him a little while to actually process the words and react. When he finally did, he curved his head backwards to look up into his boyfriend’s eyes. ‘’You wanna go to sleep?’’ He asked quietly. ‘’Cause I mean…I did offer you something in the shower this morning…’’ He told his boyfriend. Max had been so incredibly good to him all day, taking care of him, watching his movie marathon, Charles wanted to give back a little, just because he loved Max so much.

In response though, Max just let out a bit of a groan and put a hand on his face. He rubbed it a little, before he just sighed deeply and shook his head. ‘’Fuck me…’’ He mumbled. ‘’Baby, I’d love to, but I’m so fucking tired. I’m not sure I’ll even make it to bed before I fall asleep…’’ He said and let out an exasperated sigh. He desperately wanted to do things with and to Charles. More than anything. But he was just completely out of energy for the evening. ‘’Maybe we can have some fun tomorrow morning.’’ He finally suggested. ‘’When we’re both a little more rested and I won’t fall asleep while we’re going.’’ He said with a small chuckle. 

Charles couldn’t help but pout just a little bit. He had genuinely been looking forward this, so he was a little disappointed that Max didn’t actually seem up for it anymore. ‘’Ugh, if I had known that we wouldn’t be able to get it on anymore today I would’ve let you kill Lando.’’ He said, gently pulling away from his boyfriend’s embrace. He turned around when Max let go of him and kissed his lover, before he turned the tv off and took Max’s hand, dragging the sleepy man along with himself to the bedroom.

Max did protest not in the slightest when Charles took him along and easily walked with to their bedroom. Once there, he had just enough energy left to take his clothes off and let them fall onto the ground, before he crawled into bed with a pleased sigh, curling up and waiting for Charles. The man in question went into the bathroom first, only coming back out after a couple of minutes. Max greeted him with a groan and opened his arms then, pouting a little. ‘’Finally. I’ve been waiting for you for ages. I almost had to go to sleep without kissing my boyfriend goodnight. It’s unacceptable.’’

Charles started laughing a little at that and shook his head at his dumb boyfriend, before he too finally got into bed and quickly crawled into Max’s warm and familiar embrace. ‘’I love you.’’ He said quietly, kissing the man softly as they cuddled close together. ‘’Love you too.’’ Max mumbled, before he let out another yawn. ‘’Goodnight, Charlie.’’ He then added, letting his eyes almost immediately fall closed. ‘’Goodnight, Maxy.’’ The Monegasque whispered in return. He placed a final peck on his lover’s lips, before he cuddled in nice and close, taking in his favourite spot in Max’s arms. 

Sleep did not come easy to Charles that night. Now that the excitement of the movie marathon had started to fade away a little, and Max hadn’t been able to relax him again, his mind was free to start getting nervous for the day to come. His first therapy session. He was absolutely terrified. He would actually be forced to face his feelings, to talk about them out loud to someone who wasn’t his Maxy. And even that had been incredibly difficult to do. It took him another 2 hours to calm his mind, and even then it was really only done by Max holding him a little closer and nuzzling into his hair as he slept. That distracted and relaxed Charles enough to help him fall asleep.

Max was, once again, greeted by two vibrant green eyes staring into his own as he woke up the next morning. Charles looked like he had already been awake for a while and Max groaned a little when he checked the clock. ‘’Charlie…it’s only 8…’’ He mumbled, rubbing his eyes a little as he took a deep breath in an attempt to wake himself up a little more. ‘’I know…’’ Charles replied quietly. He was looking at Max as the Dutchman woke up and sighed softly. ‘’I just can’t sleep anymore…’’ He admitted quietly.

Charles had been up for about an hour now. He had woken up seemingly completely randomly, but his mind had instantly started to race again, scared as he was to go to therapy. Once it did, he really wasn’t able to turn it off anymore, and that was then it for Charles’ night. He hadn’t slept a single second since. Max hummed a little in response. Charles’ worrying helped to wake him up a little more and he moved around a little so he could look into his boyfriend’s eyes without straining his neck too much. ‘’Talk to me, love.’’ The Dutchman said quietly. ‘’Tell me what you’re feeling. What you’re thinking.’’

Charles let out a long, deep sigh and bit his lip a little. He didn’t really want to tell Max how he was feeling, because it was stupid, but they had made a deal after all. ‘’I’m scared about therapy…’’ He said quietly, swallowing thickly. ‘’I’m gonna go and I know that it will probably help in the end, but…it’s really scary to face myself like that.’’ He told Max, looking a little shaken and just helpless as he looked into his boyfriend’s eyes. 

‘’Oohhh, Charlie.’’ Max said quietly, pulling his boyfriend in a little close and give him sweet little kisses all over his beautiful face. He smiled lovingly at Charles as he pulled away from the kiss and gently rubbed his back as he held his boyfriend close. ‘’You’re so precious.’’ He told the Monegasque quietly. ‘’It’s completely normal to be scared, you understand that, right?’’ He asked quietly, to which Charles nodded. ‘’Yes…but that doesn’t mean that it doesn’t bother me…’’ He said and sighed again.

Max hummed softly in return and placed another kiss on Charles’ nose as they cuddled together. ‘’So tell me, would you like me to relax you here in bed, or maybe make you some breakfast, or take you for a nice shower, what do you want? I’m here to help.’’ He told his boyfriend with a sweet smile. Charles couldn’t help the happy little sigh that came out of his mouth and he snuggled in a little closer to Max, placing a kiss on the man’s shoulder as his boyfriend held him. ‘’Shower and breakfast sound really nice…’’ He finally said, after thinking it over for a minute. ‘’I-I’m sorry but I’m not really in the mood right now for other things, Maxy…’’ 

The Dutchman hummed softly in return and couldn’t help the small sigh that escaped him, but he nodded nonetheless. ‘’No worries, love. Like I said, right now I just want you to feel as good as you possibly can.’’ He kissed Charles again, before he finally started to move away, stepping out of bed. ‘’Would you mind showering alone though? In the meantime I can make you some food aaaaaaand I dunno if I can actually hold myself back if I were to see you naked right now…’’ He admitted with a bit of a chuckle.

‘’That’s okay.’’ Charles replied easily. ‘’I’ll just put some music on and shower on my own. It might give me a chance to relax a little bit.’’ He told Max with a soft smile. Once his boyfriend had left the room, Charles got up and went to shower, putting on a playlist of pop songs he could easily sing along to. It relaxed him. He ended up spending a lot longer in the shower than he possibly needed to. The water was nice and warm and it felt like he was in his own little world there, momentarily not needing to worry about a single thing.

After almost half an hour though, he realized he did when Max called for him. ‘’Charlie, you okay?! It’s been a while, I’m getting slightly worried!’’ The Dutchman yelled over the loud music. ‘’Y-yeah, sorry!’’ Charles replied. ‘’Just lost track of time, be right there!’’ He shut the water off then and stepped out, spending some more time in the bathroom to brush his teeth and do his hair and just get ready for the day. He went back into the bedroom then and put on fresh boxers, some tight black jeans, an overly expensive designer shirt and his glasses, before he finally joined Max in the kitchen for breakfast.

‘’Heeeeeey…’’ Max said as he heard Charles walk into the kitchen behind him. ‘’Someone took his sweet time getting rea-‘’ He turned around and suddenly stopped talking when he noticed the way the Monegasque was looking. ‘’Holy shit…’’ He said, blinking a few times to come to himself again after the initial shock of actually seeing his boyfriend making an effort to look good again. ‘’You look….wow…’’ He said, laughing a little as he walked over and kissed Charles. ‘’You look fucking hot, babe.’’ He finally settled on when he found the right word, before he pulled his boyfriend over to sit down. ‘’So guess who managed to actually put together some French toast and fresh fruit?! Spoiler alert, it me.’’

Charles started laughing then, shaking his head on Max again and humming in surprise when he got served his food. ‘’Oh wow, Maxy…this looks…actually edible.’’ He told his boyfriend with a bright smile. Max gave him a hopeful look then, and after Charles cut a piece of his toast and ate it together with a raspberry, he let out a pleased little moan, before he leaned over and pecked Max’s lips. ‘’Tastes really good, too.’’ He added, making Max absolutely beam with pride. ‘’Yes, thank you!’’ The Dutchman said, before he got his composure back and blushed slightly. ‘’I mean…yeah, thanks babe…I do this all the time…’’ 

Max cleared his throat then and just kept smiling like an idiot as he served Charles some coffee as well, before he sat down next to his boyfriend and enjoyed his breakfast. After they’d finished, Max cleaned up after the both of them and hummed softly. He just could not keep his eyes off of Charles and hugged his boyfriend from behind, placing a few kisses in his neck. ‘’Do you think you’d be alright on your own for a little while? I wanna go and shower and get dressed, too.’’ He told his boyfriend, who considered the question for a moment. ‘’Yeah, I wanna go and call my mom anyway.’’ He told Max. 

The Dutchman nodded softly and placed another kiss in his boyfriend’s neck then, before he finally pulled away. Like Charles, he took a nice and long shower, really enjoying himself and fully relaxing in there for a while. For a moment he considered touching himself, given he’d really been horny ever since their shower the day before, but he finally decided against it. He still just really wanted to get it on with Charles, and doing this now would only ruin it. So he just had a regular shower, after which he too got himself ready and dressed for the day to come. Max decided to raid Charles’ closet to do so, and put on another one of Charles’ expensive shirts, while sticking to just a normal pair of blue jeans, even though knowing the Monegasque, they were all still extremely expensive designer ones.

Max finally returned to the living room, to find Charles still on the phone. He looked happy though, with a beautiful little smile on his face as he talked to what Max presumed was still his mom. He sat down next to Charles and pulled the man against his chest, giving him little kisses as his boyfriend kept talking. ‘’…uhhu. Yes, mama. I will…No, Maxy stop it, that tickles.’’ He wriggled a little in Max’s arms, but the Dutchman only held on tighter in response and continued to place kisses in his boyfriend’s neck, finally turning Charles into a giggling mess. ‘’I…mama can I call you back some other time? I have to go and take care of this.’’ He stopped talking for a second then, still giggling. ‘’Okay, love you too, bye.’’ He said, before he quickly ended the call and started to properly fight back. 

Charles turned around in Max’s arms, giving him a little shove so that the still somewhat injured Dutchman ended up on his back, with Charles towering over him. ‘’Max. Emilian. Verstappen. You do not interrupt me like that while I’m on the phone with mama!’’ He told his boyfriend, who just gave a sheepish shrug in return. ‘’Well my boyfriend looked really cute and I wanted to give him kisses…what else was I supposed to do?’’ He asked, giving his boyfriend an innocent look. Charles just fondly rolled his eyes then, leaning down and kissing Max deeply. ‘’I hate you.’’ He mumbled against the man’s lips, making him laugh. ‘’Love you too, Charlie.

They made out for a while then, until Max finally glanced at a clock and noticed that really, it was time for them to leave for Charles’ appointment. ‘’Babe. It’s time.’’ He told Charles then, gently rubbing his side a little when he instantly felt the Monegasque tensing up. ‘’Shhh, relax. It’s going to be fine and I’m going to be there for you. Promise.’’ He assured his boyfriend, before they slowly got up. ‘’Are you able to drive, babe?’’ Max asked Charles, to which the Monegasque gave a bit of a huff. ‘’I have driven through these streets at 300 kilometres an hour. I can handle a drive to an office, Max.’’ He mumbled, clearly getting a little nervous and irritable now.

Max stayed quiet then, not wanting to set Charles off by accident, and finally left the apartment with him. The car ride to the office was quiet beside the sounds coming from the radio. Charles finally parked the car when they got there, and held on to Max’s hand just a little too tightly as they went in together. Charles completely unnecessarily introduced himself to the very kind assistant, and took place in the small waiting area. It was clear the therapist worked as the sole therapist in this office given how small it was, but it was tastefully decorated and as Max looked at Charles, it seemed like the man was at least somewhat at ease. ‘’I’m here for you. Now, and when you come out. There’s absolutely nothing to worry about, Charlie.’’ He told him quietly.

They waited for a few minutes, before an older, kind looking woman opened the door to the office with a warm smile. ‘’Charles? Tu peux entrer maintenant.’’ She told the Monegasque, which Max took to mean as much as that Charles could come in. He pressed a kiss to Charles’ hand then and demonstrated to his boyfriend to take a deep breath. Charles did, before he finally got up and went in, leaving Max on his own. Max knew that this was going to take about an hour, so it wasn’t long before he left, at least for a little while. He took a walk outside in the fresh air, trying to clear his head a little. He was so worried about Charles. He had seen just how scared the man was, and he hoped it really would all go well in there.

Max was back at his post when the hour was up, and it was a few minutes after that that the door to the therapist’s office finally opened again. Max got up with a smile, but his heart instantly sank when he saw Charles walking out. The man’s shoulders were slumped, his eyes were red, puffy and bloodshot from crying, and he looked as bad as Max had ever seen him. Oh no.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...here's the bad news...I might not have time to write new chapters tomorrow or the day after...the good news is that I have an idea for a new fic, which will also feature these two idiots, albeit a different universe. So look forward to that!


	36. Endings & New Beginnings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's here. This is it. It's the final chapter you guys.  
> I can't believe we actually made it here. This fic is 100.098 words in my Word file, which is just....insane.  
> Thank you all so much for reading and commenting and everything, I love every single one of you <3

Max nearly started to cry himself when he saw Charles walking out of the therapist’s office. The Monegasque just looked absolutely broken and defeated as he finished his appointment. The man’s shoulders were slumped, his eyes were red, puffy and bloodshot from crying, and he looked as bad as Max had ever seen him. The therapist put her hand on Charles’ shoulder for a moment, and he gave her a weak smile and a nod before he finally walked back over to his boyfriend, almost falling into his arms as Max hugged him tightly and held him close. ‘’I’m here, baby. Are you alright?’’ Max asked quietly. 

Charles took a deep breath once he was finally back in Max’s arms and didn’t give an answer, because he genuinely did not know. He was worse, he was better, he was broken and he was relieved. His mind was an absolute and utter mess. ‘’Let’s go home.’’ Max whispered after a minute, giving the Monegasque a small kiss on his temple before he took his hand and walked him out of the office, back to the car. ‘’Hand me the keys, Charlie. I’ll drive us home.’’ Max knew that he really should not be driving yet, given his injuries, but Charles was not in any state to drive whatsoever.

‘’No. I’m driving. You’re….no.’’ Charles finally said. He had been quiet ever since he’d walked out of his session, but Max trying to care for him despite his own injuries shook him awake enough to get him back out of his head and into the real world. Max let out a long sigh in response and walked back over to Charles, giving him a quick kiss before staring into his eyes. ‘’Are you sure you can drive, love? I don’t want you t-‘’ Charles interrupted Max before he could even finish his sentence. ‘’Yes. Just let me.’’ He told his boyfriend almost angrily. He could drive. He wasn’t that weak.

Max was taken aback a little by Charles’ aggressive reaction, but stepped away and got in the passenger’s seat. The both of them stayed completely silent for the entire drive home, Max because he did not want to set Charles off, and Charles because he still had too many things to think about, rather than talk. When they finally got back home, Max watched as Charles laid down on the couch, just staring at the wall. He decided then to just leave the Monegasque alone for a little while and went to the kitchen to make them both some sandwiches to have for lunch. 

It was about fifteen minutes later when Max finally returned to the living room, lifting Charles’ legs and putting them back down on his own lap as he sat down. Absent-mindedly, he started to gently run his fingers over Charles’s ankle, subconsciously just wanting some kind of skin contact with his boyfriend. ‘’Do you want to talk to me about it, Charlie?’’ He asked quietly, making Charles shake his head. ‘’I just talked for an hour. I’m done talking.’’ He replied, curling in on himself a little more as he closed his eyes. ‘’Okay…’’ Max said quietly. He hummed for a moment, before he started moving again. He pushed Charles forward a little from the back of the couch and squeezed himself in behind, spooning his boyfriend as he gently hugged him close to his chest.

Charles really just let it happen, allowing Max to do whatever he wanted with him. He didn’t feel like talking in the slightest, but he really, really needed a little cuddle with his boyfriend. Max hadn’t even really wrapped his arms around Charles’ waist, before he Monegasque just started to cry. Really, he had felt like crying again as soon as he had set foot outside of the office, but he was trying to stay strong and not show just how much the entire thing was getting to him. Now though, he was in the safest possible place in the world. He was in his boyfriend’s comforting embrace, and that was where he could let all of his walls down. It wasn’t long before Charles was turning over in Max’s arms, burying his face in the man’s shirt as he cried in his arms. They just stayed like that for a few minutes. Max knew he didn’t need to say anything. He just needed to be there for his boyfriend, holding him nice and close and just making him feel safe enough to let go.

‘’Maxy…it was so awful.’’ Charles finally managed to say in between his sobs. ‘’I know, babe. I know.’’ Max whispered in returned. He nuzzled his face into Charles’ fluffy hair and kissed his head. ‘’I’m here for you, promise. Forever and always.’’ He said quietly. They stayed like that for pretty much the entire rest of the afternoon. From time to time, Charles shared a little more about the experience as he found the courage to do so, and finally, much to Max’s enormous relief, told the Dutchman that he would still be going back for this next appointment. Charles was scheduled for 2 appointments a week for the foreseeable future, so that it wouldn’t end up being too much on him. He would still have some time to process everything that way, instead of being bombarded with new ideas and insights each and every day.

The weeks after were incredibly difficult to Charles. He went to all of his appointments like an absolute champ, and Max was there for him every step of the way, but it didn’t make facing his demons any less difficult. After a few sessions, he got a prescription for some pills, that Charles was extremely hesitant to take. He kept saying that he wasn’t crazy, that he didn’t need pills to make him normal. It took a long talk with the therapist and Max present in the room to make Charles feel more safe and secure, before he finally agreed, as his therapist explained the pills weren’t designed to make him ‘better’ or anything like that, which Charles was afraid of. In fact, he had to think of them like painkillers, as for a time, they would numb the pain, while they together would try and get to the source of it.

Charles took that explanation to heart and finally accepted the extra help. The first few days after he started taking the medication were hard on him. He had spells of dizziness and nausea, and he was terrified that his mind started to feel different and almost alien. He felt even worse and extremely guilty when he woke up one morning, and could hear Sophie’s voice through the phone as Max was on a call with her next to him, wishing her son a happy birthday. Charles had completely forgotten. Max kept telling him that it didn’t matter, that they’d have more birthdays to celebrate, but Charles spent almost the entire day throwing up, the guilt making him feel physically terrible, too.

After about a week though, he started to finally settle down. Most of the side effects started to fade, and Charles increased his amount of sessions to three a week as he tried to work his very hardest to try and make himself better. Max had never felt so proud. Obviously some days were better or worse than others, but overall the progression that Charles had was absolutely staggering, and it really seemed like things were starting to take a turn for the better. 

Charles really found that he had lost all track and sense of time when he woke up one morning to a brightly smiling Max. ‘’Good morning, birthday boy.’’ The Dutchman said quietly, giving Charles a gentle kiss as he pulled him in a little closer, while the Monegasque just looked very confused. ‘’It’s my birthday…?’’ He asked quietly. ‘’But…really?’’ Max hummed softly in return and nodded. He smiled, but even Charles could see how concerned he was that he didn’t even manage to keep track of this. ‘’It is, love. And we’re going to make today a very nice one for you.’’ He said quietly. Charles pulled a bit of a face and bit his lip. ‘’I don’t really want a party…I’m not ready to face all those people’’ He admitted quietly, to which Max just smiled. ‘’I know, baby. We’re just gonna spend the day together. Just the two of us. And you can have all the cake you want.’’ He said and winked.

They ended up having a really nice day together. Max had bought Charles an extremely over-expensive watch for his birthday that the Monegasque had had his eye on for a while now but had decided was too pricey to really get for himself. After getting his present, Max made Charles breakfast in bed, and they stayed there until noon, just cuddling and making out and enjoying each other’s company as much as they could. The rest of the day was spent entirely as Charles wanted it. He got some calls of course and had to take care of those for a while, but mostly he just spent it with Max. They ate some cake, watched a movie, Charles played some piano, it was just the way that he wanted it.

The next day though, he had to get right back to it. All in all, it was about early December when Charles’ therapist finally told him that in her opinion, he had improved so much over the last few months that he could both stop using his medication and cut back his appointments from twice to once a week, really just so that she could continue to monitor him and his recovery and make sure they’d catch it early enough if his demons were ever to come back in this way. Charles was shocked as he left the office. He left together with Max and just stared ahead a little as he sat down in the passenger’s seat. Max’s injuries had healed pretty much completely at this point, and so he had now designated himself as Charles’ driver to and from his sessions.

Max gave Charles a concerned look. The Monegasque had been so much more relaxed after his sessions lately, and this seemed very out of character. ‘’Are you okay, love…?’’ Max asked quietly. Charles seemed almost startled when Max talked to him and turned his head to look at his boyfriend. ‘’I…I think so…?’’ He told the Dutchman. ‘’She just told me that I don’t have to take my pills anymore. And that we can go back to one session a week…’’ Max looked shocked for a second, before he broke into just the widest possible smile. He leaned over the middle console, hugging Charles tightly and kissing his cheek. ‘’I knew it. I knew it. Fuck, I’m so proud of you, babe.’’ He told the man. Charles just hugged Max back, melting almost into the embrace and sighing happily. ‘’We made it, Maxy…’’ He said quietly.

Charles’ feelings of needing to break up with Max were long gone, and as the days continued, he realized that he had genuinely never been happier in his entire life. That same day they put up their Christmas tree in the apartment, and decorated it and the rest of the apartment with an extravagant amount of decorations. Charles absolutely loved celebrating Christmas, and he was looking forward so much to getting to do so with the man of his dreams. 

On Christmas morning, Charles once again woke up in Max’s arms, as he did every single morning. He smiled when he felt the Dutchman’s arms tightening a little around him, and stretched himself a little before he cuddled in closer. ‘’Goodmorning.’’ He heard above him, in Max’s low morning voice, which made the Monegasque giggle a little. ‘’Goodmorning, Maxy.’’ He said quietly. He pressed a small kiss to Max’s shoulder and took a deep breath, just enjoying the warmth of his boyfriend as they cuddled. ‘’Merry Christmas.’’ He added when the realization hit him, and he looked up at Max with a bright smile.

Max watched as Charles figured out the date and chuckled a little to himself, before he leaned down and kissed his boyfriend. ‘’Merry Christmas, Charlie.’’ He replied as he pulled away. Charlie hummed softly then, the grin still visible on his face. ‘’Do you want your first present yet?’’ He asked excitedly, to which Max could only nod. ‘’Uhm….sure? Is it you?’’ He asked, making Charles laugh, before he hummed. ‘’Well….no. No it’s not. I mean…later.’’ He said and just started laughing again, before he pulled away and jumped out of bed, running out of the room. 

Max could only look on confused as he waited for Charles to come back, which he finally did after a few minutes, carrying a small gift-wrapped box with him. He handed it over to Max and sat down on the bed with just the biggest, excited smile on his face. ‘’Oohhhh, this looks special.’’ Max noted with a hum. He sat up too and unwrapped the box, opening it once all the wrapping was off. Once he had done so, he gave Charles a very confused look. ‘’Uhm…Charlie? Are these the apartment keys I’ve been looking for for two days…?’’ He asked, making Charles blush a little.

The Monegasque cleared his throat as he didn’t really get any other reaction from his boyfriend, and almost jumped a little with impatience as he sat on the bed. ‘’Yeeeees, but what do they mean?’’ He demanded from Max, who was more lost now than ever. ‘’I…I genuinely don’t know, babe…’’ The Dutchman replied, making Charles sigh deeply. ‘’I’m asking you to move in with me you dummy.’’ He told Max, who just started laughing in return. ‘’You…what? Charlie, I’ve been living here for months if you haven’t noticed.’’ He told the Monegasque with an amused smile. 

Charles just gave Max an annoyed look in return, a little pissed that his boyfriend didn’t appreciate the gesture as much as he’d hoped. ‘’Yes, but not like…officially…’’ He told Max with a bit of a pout. ‘’And I want to make it official and have you cancel your lease on your depressing little apartment and all…’’ At that, Max put the box on his nightstand and reached over, pulling Charles on top of himself as he laid down. ‘’You are the cutest boy that has ever lived.’’ He told the Monegasque with a loving smile. ‘’And of course I will officially move in with you! I will cancel that apartment first thing tomorrow, promise.’’ He said with a wink.

Charles finally broke into a smile then and kissed Max deeply. ‘’I love you so much, Maxy.’’ He said as he pulled away, sighing happily as he looked down into his boyfriend’s eyes. ‘’We’re going to be okay.’’ He said quietly. ‘’We really are. Now and forever.’’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I'm gonna need a week off after writing this whole fic in the span of a month and a week, buuuuuut I do already have a new fic idea lined up with the same pairing cause I love them.  
> And if you guys want me to, I will do another cute one-shot on the 2021 season as a sort of mini-sequel to this fic.  
> Let me know!


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